Resilience when the schedule changes.
December 2, 2011 11:51 AM Subscribe
How do I bounce back more quickly when plans go awry?
posted by SNWidget to Human Relations (9 answers total) 23 users marked this as a favorite
I've got anxiety, depression, and ADHD, and I'm on meds for all of it. They're working at various levels, and I'm still tweaking them. I'm a PhD in the last year of coursework for a social science/music/education degree.
That out of the way, here's where I find myself. In the past year, I've finally realized that I need a schedule. I live and die by a schedule, and when the schedule is in place, I can have a life that looks very much like something normal. My wife's been instrumental in helping keep me on the rails with my schedules (without being a mother figure, thank God). With her help, medication, and some therapy, I can now usually make schedules, follow them, and do what I need to do.
It's not perfect, but it keeps me on a path.
And then something goes wrong.
Today, I was supposed to get up and start pulling articles for a literature review due next week. However, my internet was down. Instead of regrouping, thinking, "Ok, call to let the cable company know, then off to Starbucks," I got stuck on making the internet work. Like, without that, nothing else could go on. It was a block that I couldn't get around to save my life. By the time that got fixed (2 hours later), I was back to my old ways, playing Sporcle quizzes, Minecraft, blogs, and wasting time instead of doing what I was supposed to be doing.
That one little thing screwed up my schedule, and 5 hours later, I'm still not back on it. In fact, I've had to cancel other things I was supposed to do today because I feel so overwhelmed.
Part of this is end of the semester stress; I realize that. Part of it, though, is something I've always had trouble with. By learning to become more tied to schedules and lists for survival, I find that any unplanned deviation can really fuck with me. I can go on vacations without schedules and wander around, no problem. With my school/work schedules, though, things completely explode if something changes.
How do you get around this? From a completely messed up life with no schedule or plan to a more regimented life, how do I learn the adaptation ability? Where's the middle ground?