Can you grow goals?
November 26, 2011 1:41 PM Subscribe
I used to have clear goals. Now I don't. Have you been through a foggy period in which you had no clue what you wanted to do with your life while everyone around you spoke with confidence about moving abroad, writing the book or saving the world? What can I do to shake myself out of limbo before 10 or 15 years fly by?
posted by jessca84 to human relations (25 answers total) 81 users marked this as a favorite
When I was 23, I knew what I wanted: to move to New York City to work as an editor. I'm 27 now and have been "living the dream" for three years.
Recently, I was having dinner with a super accomplished and ambitious friend. As he shared all of the projects he's excited to be working on, it hit me: I don't have projects. And honestly, I don't have big goals anymore, either. Every day is roughly the same: I roll in and out of work, go for a run or attend a yoga class, and head home to my apt. A few times a week I grab food with friends.
While I have no desire to live a life as turbo-charged as my friend does (seriously, he's a little manic), I really do want to be engaged with life. And excited about something. I'm just not sure HOW. My brain feels like a dull pencil tip, and it's been that way for years now.
Any suggestions about how to, well ... grow some goals? The one thing I can think of is to sign up for a class in something that at least vaguely interests me.
(Oh, one note: I very much want to fall in love, get married and have a family. While I don't apologize for that, it frightens me that it's my only discernible life ambition. And I know it's counterproductive to put all of my focus on it.)