I mean I sure wouldn't want to know how often THEY get it on.
October 24, 2011 7:13 PM Subscribe
As an adult, how honest should one be with parents?
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (41 answers total) 9 users marked this as a favorite
First of all, my family isn't super duper close, but we've always gone through the motions of going out on birthdays, a family vacation here and there, me coming home every vacation in college to spend time with them. Now that I'm out of school and working full-time a couple hours away, they still expect me to call on the weekends and visit whenever I have a holiday.
Recently, things have gotten more serious with my SO, and I've been spending weekends at his place, something that my parents have made clear would be end-of-the-world, catastrophic-level immoral/unsafe. So I haven't told them. I'm typically a pretty honest person, though, so when they call me Sunday morning, it makes me extremely uncomfortable to have to lie to them about where I am. It also makes me feel a bit like they're still checking up on my whereabouts, even now that I'm no longer living at home.
To get to the point of this question, I'm grateful for what my parents have done for me, and I don't want to do wrong by them. I don't think it makes me a bad person to omit details, necessarily, but I still wonder if I'm being unfair to them, or somehow betraying them, by lying to them.
My parents have never really spoken to me about sex, except maybe "don't do it." They are religious, conservative, and don't communicate well with me about things in general. Sometimes I think that they might even prefer not to know.
How have you handled this issue with your parents/children? Is it wrong of me not to tell them? And maybe more in general, how much do my parents really need to know about my life, now that I'm no longer living with them?