Ill Apron Strings
July 13, 2011 9:37 AM Subscribe
My mother doesn't take of her health at all, she ignores everyone's health advice when she has problems, and it's making me feel guilty and frustrated for not trying hard enough and not being able to support her.
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (13 answers total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
Our parents are asian immigrants to the UK who had us kids here. Her teeth are coming loose but she refuses to see a dentist, her back is always hurting but she refuses to buy a mattress to replace the broken one. My siblings and I have tried for years to get her to take better care of herself by reason and it's gotten us no where. There have been points when we've forced her to go to doctors and dentists appointments we've booked for her and I've threatened to buy her the mattress that she won't. Here in England the immediate family is all she has so it seems like her idea of love is sacrifice and martyrdom; self abnegation is her identity and also one of the few ways she feels she can 'help' us, but it just makes everyone feel shit. She refuses to spend money on anything and represses all her problems. So we can't tell when a problem is serious, chronic, etc. Our dad is a self absorbed narcissist who doesn't really give a crap. What do you do.