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August 1, 2010 4:41 PM

How can I convince my employer to promote me when there is a potential conflict of interest? Should I even try?

My spouse and I work at the same company: my spouse a middle manager, and I in the festering bowels of customer service. Recently, the company advertised a new position that matches my degree and skill set perfectly, and I promptly applied.

The new position would give me access to confidential information - including salary data for everyone in the company. My boss believes that although my application is strong, my relationship with my spouse and my spouse's position in the company could jeopardize my chances of getting this promotion. My boss says that the person hiring for this position thinks it is human nature for husbands and wives to share secret information with each other, and is hesitant about hiring me even if I am the best person for the job.

I am desperate for this promotion, and I will probably be granted an interview as a matter of courtesy. I want to persuade the interviewer that I will not share confidential salary information with my spouse, but I am not sure how to argue this in a convincing and compelling way. Does anyone have any suggestions? Should I even bring this up in the interview?

For what it's worth, my spouse has been with the company for many years, is trusted and well-respected, and has an exemplary performance record. I have been there for a far shorter period of time, but I perform well and have an excellent work ethic.

posted by anonymous to Work & Money (11 answers total)

If you found out, in the course of your daily affairs in the new position, that your husband was the lowest paid person in his position, and dramatically so, would you really do nothing about it? No hints to look elsewhere? No discussions about how to effectively ask for a raise? And how would a hiring manager tell the difference between someone who would do this and someone would not?

The best you can do here is find outside evidence for salaries, to convince this person salary information is not as top secret as claimed. Glassdoor for example, has a nice "Show me yours and I'll show you everyone else's" information gathering model. I realize that companies try to prevent this kind of thing, because it reduces their massive negotiating power. There's a reason most people get the bulk of their raises from switching companies: on a promotion, the employer knows how much you make but you don't know how much others make. By pointing out how much info is on glassdoor, you may be able to argue that the negotiations are not as at risk as one might think. If you're particularly Machiavellian, you might namedrop the site to coworkers to drum up information (this could well backfire).

The other possible option is a Non Disclosure Agreement with substantial penalties. The problem is plausible deniability, and monitoring for enforcement. Plus, they'd have to think you have something to lose that outweighs an increased negotiated salary. When the subject of conflict of interest comes up, and the other side seems uninterested in offering the position without your husband leaving the company, ask them if they think an NDA could be drafted instead.
posted by pwnguin at 5:08 PM on August 1, 2010

Would it be possible for someone else to handle just your husband's records? Else I think you're out of luck - imagine if you saw your husband was the lowest paid of his peers? Not telling him would fester inside, telling him is not allowed and he would be upset. Lots of companies do not allow any family hires at all.
posted by meepmeow at 5:12 PM on August 1, 2010

I'm sorry, I'm sure you're very trustworthy, but if I were one of your coworkers, there is literally nothing you could say to me to convince me that your husband does not have a substantial advantage in salary negotiations based on your access to financial data. No matter how much I trust you, I'd feel that it was shady. Human nature is such that no matter how hard I tried not to let it, this issue would probably lead to me treating your husband differently. It's not fair to other employees in the company to set up this situation. If I were you, I'd start looking for jobs at other companies.
posted by decathecting at 5:43 PM on August 1, 2010

The only way to ensure there is no chance of a conflict of interest is to automatically deny you the position. Any other way and you introduce the risk of impropriety. Doesn't mean that risk is ever actualized. But the risk exists nonetheless. Sorry.
posted by Civil_Disobedient at 6:19 PM on August 1, 2010

meepmeow: "Would it be possible for someone else to handle just your husband's records? Else I think you're out of luck - imagine if you saw your husband was the lowest paid of his peers? Not telling him would fester inside, telling him is not allowed and he would be upset. Lots of companies do not allow any family hires at all."

I think it's safe to say it's not her husband's information that's being protected here, it's everyone else's. This does make me wonder though, how well compensated people who handle salary data are.
posted by pwnguin at 7:08 PM on August 1, 2010

How'd you guys get "husband" from "spouse"?
posted by mendel at 7:37 PM on August 1, 2010 [8 favorites]

I honestly don't know. For some reason my mental picture of the asker was formed quite early. Before I even saw what the conflict of interest was. I could run the question through gender guessers, but no one phrase gave anything away. I blame society for brainwashing me.

At any rate, the point stands. It's not the spouse's information that's being hidden, you can get that from a tax form and the bank statements. It's the knowledge of what other people are earning that the company fears being revealed.
posted by pwnguin at 9:49 PM on August 1, 2010

Honestly, your best bet here might be to acknowledge the conflict of interest, and make it clear to your boss that you'd like to proceed with the interview process, as even if it ends in a "no" because of the conflict, the process will better prepare you for the next similar opportunity that comes up with no conflict of interest.
posted by davejay at 10:28 PM on August 1, 2010

Whoops, sorry, yes, I read husband in a prior comment, not the original post, and picked it up there. My advice is the same regardless of the genders of the spouses.
posted by decathecting at 10:39 PM on August 1, 2010

Yes - be blunt about this during the interview, at an appropriate time:

"Look, I know this is an issue, but I won't do it. I'm extremely trustworthy, and this example that I gave you earlier in the interview is evidence of that. I'm exceptionally qualified for this position, as evidenced by the resume in front and the anecdote we discussed earlier in the interview. I'm willing to go out of my way on all trust issues in this position. I would love having this job because it matches what I studied so perfectly, and because I would love it I: (A) would never endanger it by doing something stupid like and (b) would excel at it, providing value to the company above and beyond the job description."
posted by Pants! at 10:59 PM on August 1, 2010

I would suggest mentioning it as an element of your professionalism, e.g. "And of course I mentioned to my spouse the sensitive info that I would be a party to, and my spouse agreed it would be unethical for us the discuss such info."
I would also tend to think your spouse might be significantly underpaid if everyone is touchy about this.
posted by bystander at 11:16 PM on August 1, 2010