Did I Just Waste My Flirting Skills on a Back-Up Boyfriend?
July 25, 2010 7:44 AM Subscribe
Thought I hit it off with somebody I met through a mutual friend. There's been lots of fun chatting at parties, a bit of drunk flirting, but I fear I may have misread their intentions. After talking with both the mutual friend & this person, I'm starting to suspect that this person perhaps has feelings for the mutual friend.
posted by anonymous to Human Relations (7 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
About a year ago I became friends with G, who is the friend of another friend of mine. Skip ahead a couple of months and I attended a dinner party where G had brought along Q, who was another friend of hers. I spent a good deal of time at this party talking with Q and enjoyed the company. Skip ahead more time and Q is included in more parties with this particular circle of friends. Generally in each situation, Q tended to gravitate towards me and chat/hang out. Also during this time, G goes from being single to being in a relationship with somebody who was a long term friend.
After a few of these parties & social events, I ran into Q at a local hang out and we spent the afternoon with a pitcher of beer and having what I thought was a pretty great time. Lots of joking around, drunk storytelling and innocent flirting. Q insists on seeing me home, gave me his phone # & I thanked him for the fun with a very chaste kiss on the cheek.
You would think after having such a great time that maybe Q would like to hang out with me again. Nope. I've extended a couple of invitations and been politely turned down. The thing that I'm curious about is that Q has dropped everything in the past to help G out with stuff like household repairs, go on road trips, last minute wedding date et cetera. G has a boyfriend and refers to Q as just a good friend who's helpful and sweet. But I also know that G's current boyfriend was a long-term platonic friend before anything happened between them. Am I crazy for thinking that while G sees Q as "just friends" that perhaps he's hanging around (and being nice to her social circle) because he's got feelings for her? I'm not too hung up on why he's not interested in following up with our one outing*. But I do value my friendship with G and am trying to figure out what's exactly going on so that I can keep our friendship out of any sticky situations.
* Okay maybe a little bit. We really really had a great chat hanging out with each other & I'd love to get to know Q better. But if my suspicions are correct, I also feel like that's just bad news. Like Q is hanging around hoping that maybe things will eventually work out with G.