What is the proper level of affection in front of children?
July 14, 2010 6:36 PM Subscribe
I am a childless woman dating a man with children and I need some advice.
posted by anonymous to human relations (29 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
We are both in our late 40s and divorced. I've never had children, never wanted children and he has two older teenagers from his long term marriage. His kids are cool. I like them. He, on the other hand, gets really weird when he's around them with me. We've been living together for 7 months and his kids rarely come over because he doesn't invite them. When we are together with his kids for dinner or some other activity, he won't touch me, kiss me or call me by any term of endearment. It freaks me out because he's usually pretty touchy feely. He will flinch if I touch him and will actually move away from me. In fact at lunch today with one of his children, he escorted me to another room to kiss me goodbye because I had to leave early.
Is this normal parent/child behavior? My parents were always affectionate around me, so I'm thinking this is odd. He says his ex-wife hated physical contact, but he seems to be showing sypmtoms of this around his children.
When I ask him, he gets defensive. He doesn't want to make his children uncomfortable. I tell him, "but your behavior makes me uncomfortable."
I need some unbiased opinions here. Should I get over myself?