Can anyone offer tips for chugging a bottle of beer - sans straw?

July 7, 2010 5:38 PM

With the Beerlympics coming up, I need to "get in shape". Specifically, the Bottle Chug. Sadly, straws are disallowed. Any other tips, tricks or advice to get my time down?
posted by TrueVox to Food & Drink (13 answers total)

Do not seal your lips on the bottle.

Tilt your head back with mouth agape. Place the lower rip of the bottle on your lower lip and raise the bottle. You want to only raise the bottle far enough that the beer pours smoothly, if the stream has to fight against incoming air you'll lose time. If you try to suck the beer down by face fucking the bottle, you'll swallow too much air and slow yourself down.
posted by Loto at 5:41 PM on July 7, 2010

Definitely what Loto said. Also, open it ahead of time if you can, swish it around as much as feasible to let some of the carbonation out. It's much easier to swallow non-carbonated stuff so take advantage of this unless they make you crack it open & slam it immediately.
posted by rkent at 5:44 PM on July 7, 2010

Best answer: do as loto says, and practice tapping the bottom of the bottle when it is at a 75 degree angle. This will eject the beer if you do it right.

I'm told....
posted by glaucon at 5:45 PM on July 7, 2010

It's simple enough to practice with water. You can swallow with your mouth open with some practice and don't swallow the last of the beer - just close your mouth and put the bottle down once empty. You can swallow the last mouthful later.
posted by GuyZero at 5:46 PM on July 7, 2010

Fastest way to empty a bottle using no tools is to swirl the bottle and get a vortex going... air goes up while liquid comes down. I have no idea why this wouldn't work for a beer bottle, I imagine it's already been figured out by other ingenious alcoholics. Then just let it pour into your mouth and chug like a good boy.
posted by lizbunny at 5:52 PM on July 7, 2010

Response by poster: Sadly, opening beforehand isn't an option, so that's out.

Vortex, eh? Any tips on how to accomplish that?

How often should I tap the bottom of the bottle?

Oh, I forgot to mention - I'll be using a warm beer (my teeth are very sensitive) - will that change any of this advice?
posted by TrueVox at 5:59 PM on July 7, 2010

I'd think warm beer would produce more foam.

And foam + chugging is not a pleasant thing. Try burping foam out your nose.
posted by PlutoniumX at 6:04 PM on July 7, 2010

Response by poster: So... anyone know of some particularly "flat" beers straight out of the bottle?
posted by TrueVox at 6:33 PM on July 7, 2010

Absolutely NOT non-alcoholic beer if that was even being considered. It has a different surface tension and foams like anything.

I'd suggest something generic like a Corona which has next to no head and is quite pleasant warm.

Also I would thing a vortex would take to long to get going. If you had to chug a gallon of beer, yes. With a bottle vortex creation time > just drinking it.
posted by GuyZero at 6:55 PM on July 7, 2010

Response by poster: Sweet, no I'm planning on getting tanked. Thanks for mentioning that though - it's good to know. So, Corona, eh? Would something in the Bud family also work?
posted by TrueVox at 7:28 PM on July 7, 2010

Best answer: Personally, I find Bud to be more carbonated than Corona but I suppose Bud Light might be safe in that it's also flatter than average. You can also drink twice as many of them to practice with.
posted by GuyZero at 8:41 PM on July 7, 2010

Best answer: The technique people tried to teach me was to use the carbonation to your advantage and shrug the bottle until it sprays down your throat. Like this (skip to the end). People who can do it makes it considerably faster than you can empty a bottle upside down.

The trick is to have warm beer, shake, and leave no other way than down.
posted by furisto at 10:41 PM on July 7, 2010

Best answer: Here are more examples of what I am talking about.
posted by furisto at 10:53 PM on July 7, 2010