Daughter set up Facebook when forbidden. Now what?
April 27, 2010 12:03 PM Subscribe
Tween daughter on facebook behind my back.. Want to educate and discuss without freaking out. Help!
posted by anonymous to computers & internet (65 answers total) 6 users marked this as a favorite
Posted anonymously as I am a single parent and don't want my ex to use this against me in any way.
I have done my best to educate my children to online dangers - not only predators, but on chain emails, keyloggers, the dangers of sharing passwords with friends, viruses, etc. We have a family rule of not using facebook for a few reasons including that facebook put's too much of their personal information out there, even with permissions/etc. set, and that people may use this information in the future.
I will eventually let my children use facebook, but when they're 14/15, not 11 or 12.
I have recently discovered from the mother of one of my daughters friends, that while at a sleepover at her house, my daughter and her friends created a facebook account for her and is actively using it. The mother has told me that my daughter will "come out" to me about breaking the rules tonight.
So, my question is, I understand that by simply overreacting and freaking out about this, that I will a) drive this behavior, b) teach her to hide things better, c) teach her she can't come to me. But at the same time, I am not willing to budge, and think she should wait two more years before starting to use this site.
My question is, how should I approach this? What are things I should say, but also what are things I should avoid?
I think I am looking at points for consideration rather than a script or plan.
For the record, I do not have my own facebook account. I have provided my children with mobileme emails for their computers, and have basic content filtering running on their laptops using Bluecoat's free product.