Frustrated con spanglish non-progress
March 5, 2010 5:27 AM Subscribe
How do I relax and start conversing in Spanish?
I would consider my spanish level at intermediate/survival. I can read most simple things and understand enough of a conversation to follow along. I have many programs that include writing, reading, audio, video, etc. I listen to the radio and watch TV in spanish, etc. I have things I can manipulate and games/toys in spanish. I have every sense covered but I just can't get conversation. Primarily I'm feeling like I'm *stuck*. How do I get over the "hump" and work on conversation?
Historically speaking this sort of thing has always been hard for me. I'm not wired to accept the errors that come along with this. I am a computer programmer so perhaps it's the nature of my training, but I also went through the same thing with learning a musical instrument. I never did get the hang of "relaxing" and playing so I eventually dropped it. Learning this language is important to me and I'm afraid it will go the same route as my 3 years with guitar went.
Can someone who has been through this offer some advice or, perhaps, a learning program that helped them?
I would consider my spanish level at intermediate/survival. I can read most simple things and understand enough of a conversation to follow along. I have many programs that include writing, reading, audio, video, etc. I listen to the radio and watch TV in spanish, etc. I have things I can manipulate and games/toys in spanish. I have every sense covered but I just can't get conversation. Primarily I'm feeling like I'm *stuck*. How do I get over the "hump" and work on conversation?
Historically speaking this sort of thing has always been hard for me. I'm not wired to accept the errors that come along with this. I am a computer programmer so perhaps it's the nature of my training, but I also went through the same thing with learning a musical instrument. I never did get the hang of "relaxing" and playing so I eventually dropped it. Learning this language is important to me and I'm afraid it will go the same route as my 3 years with guitar went.
Can someone who has been through this offer some advice or, perhaps, a learning program that helped them?
Just do it. Seriously.
Keep talking and don't stop. If you make a really major mistake, correct it, otherwise keep going and don't stop.
posted by devnull at 5:43 AM on March 5, 2010
Keep talking and don't stop. If you make a really major mistake, correct it, otherwise keep going and don't stop.
posted by devnull at 5:43 AM on March 5, 2010
Best answer: The only way to do it is just to do it. But tandem practice is a good idea. Failing that, or if that's a little too anxiety-inducing for you right now, you can always avail yourself of the use of a language-learning site and community like Livemocha. Meet some people and set up some live chats.
posted by cmgonzalez at 5:56 AM on March 5, 2010
posted by cmgonzalez at 5:56 AM on March 5, 2010
Best answer: I have every sense covered but I just can't get conversation. Primarily I'm feeling like I'm *stuck*. How do I get over the "hump" and work on conversation?
Forget the guitar and think about when you learned to ride a bicycle or learned to swim. Playing a musical instrument well takes some talent, speaking a language (like riding a bicycle) pretty much anyone can do (because you don't have to be perfect to be understood.)
Really you just have to jump in. The water's fine and you know the basics so it's just a matter of getting the arms and legs (i.e., your brain and your mouth) coordinated.
Your pronunciation will be horrible. Your accent worse. Your grammar will be bad. Your sentence structure strange. You'll make lots of mistakes and people will have difficulty understanding you. You will have to repeat yourself. You won't be able to translate from English fast enough. You'll be hugely frustrated and feel stupid. But really it's not that bad.
Insist that the people you speak to do not switch to English when you get in trouble - you have to let yourself struggle a bit. As molecicco said avoid having people to correct you - it just becomes annoying. Correction comes later once you can stream out the words.
And then - actually rather more quickly than you imagine - fluency will come. Slowly and then quickly. It's really hard and frustrating - even harder if you speak English 90% of the time - but it's not as hard as you think. Anyone can do it, but it takes some effort.
Once you can carry on a conversation with some fluency then you land on a plateau and you struggle to improve your grammar, and then you struggle to speak well.
YOU CAN DO IT. Good luck.
posted by three blind mice at 6:02 AM on March 5, 2010 [2 favorites]
Forget the guitar and think about when you learned to ride a bicycle or learned to swim. Playing a musical instrument well takes some talent, speaking a language (like riding a bicycle) pretty much anyone can do (because you don't have to be perfect to be understood.)
Really you just have to jump in. The water's fine and you know the basics so it's just a matter of getting the arms and legs (i.e., your brain and your mouth) coordinated.
Your pronunciation will be horrible. Your accent worse. Your grammar will be bad. Your sentence structure strange. You'll make lots of mistakes and people will have difficulty understanding you. You will have to repeat yourself. You won't be able to translate from English fast enough. You'll be hugely frustrated and feel stupid. But really it's not that bad.
Insist that the people you speak to do not switch to English when you get in trouble - you have to let yourself struggle a bit. As molecicco said avoid having people to correct you - it just becomes annoying. Correction comes later once you can stream out the words.
And then - actually rather more quickly than you imagine - fluency will come. Slowly and then quickly. It's really hard and frustrating - even harder if you speak English 90% of the time - but it's not as hard as you think. Anyone can do it, but it takes some effort.
Once you can carry on a conversation with some fluency then you land on a plateau and you struggle to improve your grammar, and then you struggle to speak well.
YOU CAN DO IT. Good luck.
posted by three blind mice at 6:02 AM on March 5, 2010 [2 favorites]
I am unclear if you are somewhere where you can be surrounded by native speakers or not. If so, please take advantage of it. When I was abroad and surrounded by native speakers of a language I was trying to learn, the best motivator for me to really relax and just start trying to speak as much as I could was having a beer before or while talking to people. I lost some inhibitions about speaking and generally became more comfortable with the language.
posted by piratebowling at 6:03 AM on March 5, 2010
posted by piratebowling at 6:03 AM on March 5, 2010
Another trick I used was speaking in a restaurant, food shopping, etc. situations where you can practice in advance most of what you need to say.
Go into a Mexican restaurant and order in Spanish. Ask about the food. Ask where the toilets are. Ask for more beer. The check. The usual conversation with your server. Practice your words and sentences in a real application. This is a great confidence builder.
posted by three blind mice at 6:13 AM on March 5, 2010
Go into a Mexican restaurant and order in Spanish. Ask about the food. Ask where the toilets are. Ask for more beer. The check. The usual conversation with your server. Practice your words and sentences in a real application. This is a great confidence builder.
posted by three blind mice at 6:13 AM on March 5, 2010
I agree that the guitar comparison is a bad one, wrong notes = not being able to play. With language wrong notes do not stop your ability to communicate. You've heard many non-native English speakers make mistakes and barely noted them, the same applies for you.
I've been speaking French for 20+ years, have a degree in French, lived in Francophone countries for 7 of those years and guess what? I still make mistakes.
I've been speaking Spanish for the last year, never had a lesson but am lucky enough to be able to speak it every day and boy, do I butcher that poor language. But nobody cares, we're communicating and every day I' getting better.
Good luck, you can definitely do it.
posted by jontyjago at 6:14 AM on March 5, 2010
I've been speaking French for 20+ years, have a degree in French, lived in Francophone countries for 7 of those years and guess what? I still make mistakes.
I've been speaking Spanish for the last year, never had a lesson but am lucky enough to be able to speak it every day and boy, do I butcher that poor language. But nobody cares, we're communicating and every day I' getting better.
Good luck, you can definitely do it.
posted by jontyjago at 6:14 AM on March 5, 2010
In German, it helps me to leave out the tenses. Of course it would be nice if I could speak grammatically, but the odds of anything at all coming out are increased if I don't have to think about how the past/future tense works. To do this, I say everything in the present tense, and just remember to mention when it is... so:
Yesterday, I go to the shop.
I go to the shop now.
Tomorrow, I go to the shop.
Everybody understands what I mean, and it's just far more likely that I can work out what to say and say it before the moment has passed by altogether.
(I don't know if this would work in Spanish)
Also, try having more very short casual conversations with complete strangers.... "nice shoes!", "isn't the weather lovely!".
posted by emilyw at 6:17 AM on March 5, 2010
Yesterday, I go to the shop.
I go to the shop now.
Tomorrow, I go to the shop.
Everybody understands what I mean, and it's just far more likely that I can work out what to say and say it before the moment has passed by altogether.
(I don't know if this would work in Spanish)
Also, try having more very short casual conversations with complete strangers.... "nice shoes!", "isn't the weather lovely!".
posted by emilyw at 6:17 AM on March 5, 2010
Getting detained at Heathrow was what helped me a lot in getting through my embarrassment at my accent.
More helpfully, getting slightly drunk helps.
Talking with other non-native speakers also helps ( as they are learning or went through the process of learning the language ), although you have to be careful not to imitate how the others speak.
Native speakers are, of course, very helpful but may be harder to meet depending of where you live. Livemocha, as cmgonzales suggested earlier, is a good alternative for that.
posted by Memo at 6:26 AM on March 5, 2010
More helpfully, getting slightly drunk helps.
Talking with other non-native speakers also helps ( as they are learning or went through the process of learning the language ), although you have to be careful not to imitate how the others speak.
Native speakers are, of course, very helpful but may be harder to meet depending of where you live. Livemocha, as cmgonzales suggested earlier, is a good alternative for that.
posted by Memo at 6:26 AM on March 5, 2010
Do you drink? Can you practice your Spanish in a situation where you'll be having a few? This worked great for me. When I was in Spain, a friend said he knew when I was drunk because that's when I'd only speak Spanish.
posted by ludwig_van at 6:36 AM on March 5, 2010 [1 favorite]
posted by ludwig_van at 6:36 AM on March 5, 2010 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Thanks for the comments everyone. To address a few issues... I am from the US but my wife is a native spanish speaker. Before you say 'WTF?' let me tell you that she's just as frustrated with me as I am with myself. She eventually gives up with me because I feel blocked and just can't get started with speaking. I tend to have more questions than not and she, as a native speaker, doesn't have all the grammar answers that I tend to ask. It feels like I'm holding my breath and someone is poking me. I can't seem to shake the feeling and get started. It's the same thing with sitting in a mexican restaurant (as someone suggested). When sitting in my car I can envision scenarios and order the food/greet the waitress/etc. but in the situation I lock up.
I have been on Livemocha for a while and love the site. For those that don't know of it please check it out. Thanks for bringing that into the conversation.
I'll continue to look for ideas so thanks for what has been submitted so far. I like what 'three blind mice' had to say and will consider that further.
posted by mcarthey at 6:37 AM on March 5, 2010
I have been on Livemocha for a while and love the site. For those that don't know of it please check it out. Thanks for bringing that into the conversation.
I'll continue to look for ideas so thanks for what has been submitted so far. I like what 'three blind mice' had to say and will consider that further.
posted by mcarthey at 6:37 AM on March 5, 2010
Best answer: Memo has it. one, maybe two drinks - enough so you're still totally competent, but relaxed. try ordering your cats around. in the car, roll up the windows and shout at other drivers in spanish. same with radio & tv announcers. get yourself used to the idea of thinking and responding in spanish *all the time*.
molecicco is also totally right - if you know native speakers and talk to them a lot, do ask them to not correct you unless you can't be understood. later on, you can ask them if there's anything specific you need to work on.
last of all, don't get too stuck on not remembering a word. just say the english word, or the word closest to it in spanish, and move on. the context will reveal your meaning, and someone else will give you the word.
in fact everybody here is dead on. just speak! your listeners will almost all be generous and forgiving and you'll learn more!
I totally know where you're at. I've been studying spanish ~15 years and today I go for my state teaching exam. wish me luck, and good luck to you!
posted by toodleydoodley at 6:40 AM on March 5, 2010 [3 favorites]
molecicco is also totally right - if you know native speakers and talk to them a lot, do ask them to not correct you unless you can't be understood. later on, you can ask them if there's anything specific you need to work on.
last of all, don't get too stuck on not remembering a word. just say the english word, or the word closest to it in spanish, and move on. the context will reveal your meaning, and someone else will give you the word.
in fact everybody here is dead on. just speak! your listeners will almost all be generous and forgiving and you'll learn more!
I totally know where you're at. I've been studying spanish ~15 years and today I go for my state teaching exam. wish me luck, and good luck to you!
posted by toodleydoodley at 6:40 AM on March 5, 2010 [3 favorites]
oh, mcarthey, that's my situation exactly. just start talking like (as David Sedaris says) a hillbilly or an evil baby. point, grunt, and say as many words as you can to get your point across. don't pester your wife for grammar - a lot of native spanish speakers in US don't know much spanish grammar because they've never had a spanish class but were raised by parents to speak the language.
also, try going to spanish-speaking outlets alone, and practice talking to people by yourself. you probably want to do a good job speaking in front of your wife, but talking in front of somebody else - even somebody you love - can give you performance anxiety. when you're by yourself, if you say something dumb, it's just you and a stranger, and the whole encounter just evaporates after it's over.
posted by toodleydoodley at 6:48 AM on March 5, 2010
also, try going to spanish-speaking outlets alone, and practice talking to people by yourself. you probably want to do a good job speaking in front of your wife, but talking in front of somebody else - even somebody you love - can give you performance anxiety. when you're by yourself, if you say something dumb, it's just you and a stranger, and the whole encounter just evaporates after it's over.
posted by toodleydoodley at 6:48 AM on March 5, 2010
mcarthey, I'm in pretty much the same boat as you, a couple lengths further down, and with Japanese, but seriously? Drink a little bit, as others have suggested.
Here in Japan, all of my English speaking friends (from the US, Australia, Canada, etc) speak Japanese much better than I do. For a long time, I was very, very self-conscious about speaking Japanese. One night, I got pretty drunk with my friends. I was single at the time, and drunk enough to start talking to women at the bar. The next morning, I had something of an epiphany. Not that I could speak good Japanese, but that I could speak enough of it, and well enough to have sat down with a group of Japanese people and get the phone number of a woman who spoke no English at all.
Try a drink or two, just to relax, and let go of all that nervousness. Just chat. Talk to your wife, maybe, and let her know that, just for tonight, you won't ask any questions, and maybe she won't correct you, and maybe you both get a little sloshed. You'd be surprised how much you can really do if you just relax.
posted by Ghidorah at 7:30 AM on March 5, 2010
Here in Japan, all of my English speaking friends (from the US, Australia, Canada, etc) speak Japanese much better than I do. For a long time, I was very, very self-conscious about speaking Japanese. One night, I got pretty drunk with my friends. I was single at the time, and drunk enough to start talking to women at the bar. The next morning, I had something of an epiphany. Not that I could speak good Japanese, but that I could speak enough of it, and well enough to have sat down with a group of Japanese people and get the phone number of a woman who spoke no English at all.
Try a drink or two, just to relax, and let go of all that nervousness. Just chat. Talk to your wife, maybe, and let her know that, just for tonight, you won't ask any questions, and maybe she won't correct you, and maybe you both get a little sloshed. You'd be surprised how much you can really do if you just relax.
posted by Ghidorah at 7:30 AM on March 5, 2010
Echoing comments of others: I was too shy to speak French in anything other than the most controlled circumstances (like ordering off of a menu or buying metro tickets) until I wound up drinking with a bunch of French near-strangers.
The nice thing about interacting socially with near-strangers in a foreign language is that the justifications for the mental barriers are pretty much all removed. You're not holding up the waitress, bothering your wife, embarrassing yourself in front of family or friends, talking to something that can't respond, etc.
posted by desuetude at 7:31 AM on March 5, 2010
The nice thing about interacting socially with near-strangers in a foreign language is that the justifications for the mental barriers are pretty much all removed. You're not holding up the waitress, bothering your wife, embarrassing yourself in front of family or friends, talking to something that can't respond, etc.
posted by desuetude at 7:31 AM on March 5, 2010
Before you say 'WTF?' let me tell you that she's just as frustrated with me as I am with myself. She eventually gives up with me because I feel blocked and just can't get started with speaking.
Not strange at all. You couldn't speak Spanish when you got to know your wife. "Your" language - the one you speak together - is English. I don't know if it is a rule, but generally the language I speak when I first meet and get to know someone is the language I always speak with them. It still feels odd to speak to my older Swedish friends in Swedish. I got to know them before I learned it and English is the language we always spoke - and always seem to.
As sort of confirmation, I was together with a Swedish girl for years, we always spoke Swedish together, and when we went on holiday and had to speak English it felt very strange although her English was perfect.
So long story short, at least based on my experience, your wife's frustration is to be expected and perfectly normal.
posted by three blind mice at 7:34 AM on March 5, 2010
Not strange at all. You couldn't speak Spanish when you got to know your wife. "Your" language - the one you speak together - is English. I don't know if it is a rule, but generally the language I speak when I first meet and get to know someone is the language I always speak with them. It still feels odd to speak to my older Swedish friends in Swedish. I got to know them before I learned it and English is the language we always spoke - and always seem to.
As sort of confirmation, I was together with a Swedish girl for years, we always spoke Swedish together, and when we went on holiday and had to speak English it felt very strange although her English was perfect.
So long story short, at least based on my experience, your wife's frustration is to be expected and perfectly normal.
posted by three blind mice at 7:34 AM on March 5, 2010
Response by poster: Thanks for the responses, all. It's difficult to pick a best answer since so many of you have said similar things. Overall, it's nice to know that this "block" isn't terribly unusual. I don't know that any one thing said will help me to overcome it, but I like the idea of not worrying about grammar for the time being and correcting that aspect of it later. Maybe I will try to institute "el día de español" with my wife and see where that gets us. The problem I hate is that I love to tell stories but I find myself struggling so much I tend to just sit and stare.
Here's a perfect example.
1. In English I think, I want to say (for example) "The earthquake in Chile was terrible. I hope everyone was ok. Did you feel it at your house?"
2. I start breaking down the sentence to think about what words I might know, and whether it's phrased properly for Spanish. For example, would I phrase it, instead "It was terrible the Chile earthquake."
3. I run through my head the sentence in Spanish.
4. In a best case scenario, I try to say it.
By now, I've sat and stared at the person for a good 30 seconds and only come to the realization (perhaps) that I can't even say what I want to say so I end up just saying something like "How is your food?" instead, or something equally useless.
Anyway, I will attempt the spanish/english combination and see where that gets me. I realize I shouldn't be concerned with mistakes, but I would love to be able to say the things that I feel rather than revert back to textbook sentences.
Thanks again!
posted by mcarthey at 8:03 AM on March 5, 2010
Here's a perfect example.
1. In English I think, I want to say (for example) "The earthquake in Chile was terrible. I hope everyone was ok. Did you feel it at your house?"
2. I start breaking down the sentence to think about what words I might know, and whether it's phrased properly for Spanish. For example, would I phrase it, instead "It was terrible the Chile earthquake."
3. I run through my head the sentence in Spanish.
4. In a best case scenario, I try to say it.
By now, I've sat and stared at the person for a good 30 seconds and only come to the realization (perhaps) that I can't even say what I want to say so I end up just saying something like "How is your food?" instead, or something equally useless.
Anyway, I will attempt the spanish/english combination and see where that gets me. I realize I shouldn't be concerned with mistakes, but I would love to be able to say the things that I feel rather than revert back to textbook sentences.
Thanks again!
posted by mcarthey at 8:03 AM on March 5, 2010
Alcohol (in moderation) will help - it lowers inhibitions, after all! The father of the host family I lived with when I was on a language program (France) in college poured me a glass of wine at my first dinner, and then a second. When I tried to decline, stumbling through some horrible "I have homework," he reminded me that my most important homework was learning French, and to do that I had to talk.
Since your wife is a native speaker, can you two perhaps have designated Spanish-only times at home? A few evenings a week, she speaks to you only in Spanish, you speak to her only in Spanish, and you watch/listen only to Spanish-language media. The more you do this, the faster you'll move away from "Think of something to say in English; now translate it into Spanish" and the sooner you'll get to just speaking, accent and bad grammar and all.
posted by rtha at 8:09 AM on March 5, 2010
Since your wife is a native speaker, can you two perhaps have designated Spanish-only times at home? A few evenings a week, she speaks to you only in Spanish, you speak to her only in Spanish, and you watch/listen only to Spanish-language media. The more you do this, the faster you'll move away from "Think of something to say in English; now translate it into Spanish" and the sooner you'll get to just speaking, accent and bad grammar and all.
posted by rtha at 8:09 AM on March 5, 2010
I'm in a similar situation (english speaker living in spanish speaking country), and while it's a lot easier for me to absorb spanish, the speaking part still leaves me struggling. In the beginning, my policy was that the burden of understanding me was on the other person. I assume that they will automatically fill in the gaps or correct grammar in their minds. Just like a person speaking broken english is still understandable. Most people appreciate the effort and are willing to play along. But I think the key is practice, and if you find somebody to indulge you, perfect.
posted by dhruva at 8:23 AM on March 5, 2010
posted by dhruva at 8:23 AM on March 5, 2010
I would love to be able to say the things that I feel rather than revert back to textbook sentences.
So would I, but textbook sentences are damned useful. I rely on them every day. I get into trouble if I try to get fancy.
If I want say "The earth quake was terrible" I would say "El terremoto fue 'orrible". And I would not analyze it any further than to think-Gosh, I hope 'terremoto' means 'earthquake.' And if I didn't know 'orrible' I would say 'muy malo' and smile sheepishly for talking like a second grader. Burt I would be talking.
Once you start, learn how to say "Como se dice?" and use it a lot . The people you are talking with will be happy to suggest words for you, and you can dump your dictionary.
Good luck!
posted by SLC Mom at 8:30 AM on March 5, 2010
So would I, but textbook sentences are damned useful. I rely on them every day. I get into trouble if I try to get fancy.
If I want say "The earth quake was terrible" I would say "El terremoto fue 'orrible". And I would not analyze it any further than to think-Gosh, I hope 'terremoto' means 'earthquake.' And if I didn't know 'orrible' I would say 'muy malo' and smile sheepishly for talking like a second grader. Burt I would be talking.
Once you start, learn how to say "Como se dice?" and use it a lot . The people you are talking with will be happy to suggest words for you, and you can dump your dictionary.
Good luck!
posted by SLC Mom at 8:30 AM on March 5, 2010
I'm going to be a contrarian and say that learning a language is a lot like learning to play the guitar. In both, there exists an arbitrary level of perfection or proper form that enthusiasts aspire to (prescriptive correctness or technical prowess), yet in both you can get very far off the mark and still affect people in the intended way. This isn't to say, you failed at guitar, now I laugh as you fail at Spanish! It's inspiring because language (or music) isn't a binary success; many of the more advanced touches are signifiers of expertise more than functional musts.
posted by threeants at 8:50 AM on March 5, 2010 [2 favorites]
posted by threeants at 8:50 AM on March 5, 2010 [2 favorites]
Oh and another thing that's useful: Find out the Spanish for "thingummijig" and "whatsit"! This makes the "dive head first into a sentence" approach more tolerable; at least you won't get completely stuck in the middle.
posted by emilyw at 9:24 AM on March 5, 2010
posted by emilyw at 9:24 AM on March 5, 2010
People are really forgiving when you're talking around a subject: it's a good skill to have in your non-native languages.
Imagine a non-native-English-speaking friend came up to you and said this:
"Hi mcarthey! You know, I was eating dessert last night and ate something delicious, but I can't remember the word now. It was very red, sweet, with lots of seeds on the outside. It was almost the same size as a golf ball, but not round. What do you call this fruit?"
You would absolutely be able to say "ah, it's a strawberry!".
Even simpler: "Hi! Last night I ate something, but I don't know the word. It's a small, sweet, red fruit with seeds on the outside and a green top. What's the word in English?"
What we call relative pronouns (which, that, who, etc) are useful to know too: "This person has a job which is in a hospital, but they aren't a doctor." "What do you call a person who works in a hospital, but isn't a doctor?"
posted by mdonley at 3:06 PM on March 5, 2010
Imagine a non-native-English-speaking friend came up to you and said this:
"Hi mcarthey! You know, I was eating dessert last night and ate something delicious, but I can't remember the word now. It was very red, sweet, with lots of seeds on the outside. It was almost the same size as a golf ball, but not round. What do you call this fruit?"
You would absolutely be able to say "ah, it's a strawberry!".
Even simpler: "Hi! Last night I ate something, but I don't know the word. It's a small, sweet, red fruit with seeds on the outside and a green top. What's the word in English?"
What we call relative pronouns (which, that, who, etc) are useful to know too: "This person has a job which is in a hospital, but they aren't a doctor." "What do you call a person who works in a hospital, but isn't a doctor?"
posted by mdonley at 3:06 PM on March 5, 2010
I'm a native English speaker with a native Spanish speaking fiancé. I completely understand how you feel, the fear of sounding stupid clams everyone up.
Some things I do:
1. Say something in English: 'The earthquake was terrible.' Then I force myself to repeat it in Spanish: 'El terremoto fue terrible.' This way, he knows what I'm trying to say and translate, and can offer corrections.
Since you guys are English-based, perhaps after your wife says something, you can ask her to repeat it in Spanish?
2. A lot of times, if I don't know the word in Spanish, I'll say something like: 'Mirábamos esta pelicula que se trataba de este tipo de España que tocó the harmonica y comió muchos waffles, pero por fin no logró sus sueños.' I just try to use as much Spanish as I can, but don't get stuck on every word. At this point, it's just about establishing rhythm, comfort, and a solid base--all things that build fluency. (Then I'll ask him how he would have said it.)
I think the bottom line is that we make active efforts to pepper our conversations with both languages, with the ultimate goal of the two of us being bilingual. I would recommend inserting Spanish whenever you can, rather than saving it for one day a week (although that's a noble goal that can't hurt). In my experience, it's that all-or-nothing thinking--I can only speak in Spanish, this must be perfect, I have to say exactly what I'd say in English--that can cause me to clam up.
Don't be too hard on yourself. Everyone gets nervous. Except, of course, for those few pompous jackasses who have the confidence to ramble on with natives from day one--and, because of all of that extra practice, end up being much more fluent than nice sensitive types like us who spend too much time with our noses in grammar books.
posted by blazingunicorn at 2:15 AM on March 6, 2010
Some things I do:
1. Say something in English: 'The earthquake was terrible.' Then I force myself to repeat it in Spanish: 'El terremoto fue terrible.' This way, he knows what I'm trying to say and translate, and can offer corrections.
Since you guys are English-based, perhaps after your wife says something, you can ask her to repeat it in Spanish?
2. A lot of times, if I don't know the word in Spanish, I'll say something like: 'Mirábamos esta pelicula que se trataba de este tipo de España que tocó the harmonica y comió muchos waffles, pero por fin no logró sus sueños.' I just try to use as much Spanish as I can, but don't get stuck on every word. At this point, it's just about establishing rhythm, comfort, and a solid base--all things that build fluency. (Then I'll ask him how he would have said it.)
I think the bottom line is that we make active efforts to pepper our conversations with both languages, with the ultimate goal of the two of us being bilingual. I would recommend inserting Spanish whenever you can, rather than saving it for one day a week (although that's a noble goal that can't hurt). In my experience, it's that all-or-nothing thinking--I can only speak in Spanish, this must be perfect, I have to say exactly what I'd say in English--that can cause me to clam up.
Don't be too hard on yourself. Everyone gets nervous. Except, of course, for those few pompous jackasses who have the confidence to ramble on with natives from day one--and, because of all of that extra practice, end up being much more fluent than nice sensitive types like us who spend too much time with our noses in grammar books.
posted by blazingunicorn at 2:15 AM on March 6, 2010
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In most cases, native speakers will be very forgiving, and will appreciate the enthusiasm. If people correct you too much, you can ask them not to correct you unless you ask, or they cannot understand what you mean.
Have you considered tandem learning? Can you find a native speaker who wants to improve their English? You can meet once a week for coffee and to chat; do the first half Spanish, second half English.
posted by molecicco at 5:35 AM on March 5, 2010 [2 favorites]