Help my partner and me to resolve our Dogs-on-the-Bed stalemate!
December 31, 2009 1:09 PM Subscribe
My partner has two cute and excitable 2-year old male dogs who are used to sleeping on the bed. I have a problem knowing that dog butts and genitalia have been lying where I put my face.
posted by Piscean to Pets & Animals (52 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
I apologize for the graphic descriptions here, but I must describe my dilemma. I am a pet lover, and have owned both a dog and cats in my life. I cuddle with my pets, but I have never felt comfortable about allowing them on my pillows, where I rest my face. This is just a personal preference- I don't prefer to wake up with fur on my mouth from a shedding animal.
My partner has two cute little dogs who present an even more disturbing problem for me: I have witnessed them doing the drag-the- anus-across-the-rug thing that dogs do, and have seen them do that on the bedsheet on more than one occasion. I have also seen wet spots on the pillows where their genitalia meet the fabric. My partner, who has NO PROBLEM WITH THIS (and doesn't see the need to change the sheets or pillow cases each time) told me that dog butts on the bed are no different than my (clothed) human butt on the bed.
I don't find this to be a healthy practice and have made it clear (politely) that I do not want the dogs on my pillow or the part of the sheet I lie on. Since this habit existed before I moved in, I have been willing to compromise by covering my pillows with a sheet or towel so that when the dogs are on the bed, I don't have to deal with their dirty paw prints or any invisible "leave-behinds". Unfortunately, I have come home several times to find the dogs on the bed and on my unprotected pillows. Only then does my partner angrily order the dogs down. If we are both at home and the dogs jump on the bed, I have to check to see if they are on my pillows or whether the sheet is protected because my partner won't check. The mere act of my turning to look at the dogs so exasperates my partner that a round of angry dog-shooing ensues, even though I am careful not to say a word or even make a face. When I try to discuss the situation during a calm moment, my partner becomes too angry for a civil conversation.
Now, to be honest, my partner knows that I can deal with cats on a bed better than dogs. When my partner visited my home before I moved in, I would allow my room mate's cat on the bed during the visit because the two of them got along so well. I just grinned and bore it, basically. This is because cats are cleaner and have never left dirty paw prints or pee spots on my bed (and I've never witnessed a cat scratching its anus the way dogs do).
The bottom line is that my partner doesn't like not having the dogs on the bed whenever they want to lie there, and also believes I am discriminating against them. No amount of discussion or compromising has been able to clear this issue between us. I am viewed as unreasonable. By the way, I play with the dogs and am friendly towards them. I have taken them outside when they need to go out, fed them their treats, etc. The dogs like me.
I am asking the MeFi community: am I being unreasonable about the dogs being on my pillow or unprotected sheets? I'm baffled as to my next step in resolving this problem.