I should probably stop impulse-based food shopping.

March 8, 2009 12:58 PM

What do I do about the five oysters I can't open?

I opened five out of ten with absolutely no grace at all. I watched a bunch of YouTube videos, they all feature some cheerful guy in a t-shirt popping oysters open with the ease of somebody cracking an egg. It's quite annoying. I know to find the hinge and where to put the oyster knife, but in all the videos the guy just slides it in there, gives it a gentle twist, and the shell pops open. My kitchen, on the other hand, is covered in oyster shrapnel.

I did give them a few minutes rest in the freezer, it really didn't do much at all.

On the positive side, the five I ate were really good.

If anyone knows some awesome secret that appears no where else on the internet about some top secret way of opening an oyster, please share. It took me forever to open the ones I did open. I'm wondering if that 'just slip it in hinge and twist thing' is just a big lie spread by the oyster industry so I have to buy twice as many as I need because I won't be able to open half of them.

What do I do? If I can't open them, what can I do with them? Preferably an option that involves eating them.

posted by A Terrible Llama to food & drink (13 comments total)

When you find the hinge, put the knife on it and turn it a couple times, as if you were making a hole (which you are). Once you have the hole, put the tip of the knife into it and move it from side to side until you get a fair bit of the blade in. Then sweep the blade inside the oyster a few times--you need to slice the muscle that it's using to hold its shell together. Then twist, and you're fine. Make sure the deeper side of the oyster is at the bottom.
posted by nasreddin at 1:05 PM on March 8 [1 favorite]

Oh, and you shouldn't even need an oyster knife. I've successfully used a small kitchen knife and even a Swiss Army knife blade, without problems.
posted by nasreddin at 1:07 PM on March 8

Try a medium to large flat-bladed screwdriver with a short handle instead of an oyster knife. I have shucked a lot of oysters and find that while a good oyster knife works great, a screwdriver is better than a crappy one. Whatever you use, if the oyster doesn't just pop right open, all you usually need to do is twist your knife back and forth and basically drill through the hinge. It may take a minute or two but you will get there. A lot of restaurants use something like this, but that is probably not cost effective unless you really eat a lot of them. Good luck; your post reminds me that I am missing an oyster roast right now.
posted by TedW at 1:12 PM on March 8

I recall Stefan admonishing Carla, (to the camera and before helping her), for not steaming her oysters to ease the shucking on the most recent season of Top Chef. I haven't any idea if this method actually works. I would look at Serious Eats.
posted by geekyguy at 1:15 PM on March 8

You can also gently steam them or roast them on a grill or otherwise heat them and they will open a little bit and usually be very easy to open.
posted by TedW at 1:15 PM on March 8

I recall Stefan admonishing Carla, (to the camera and before helping her), for not steaming her oysters to ease the shucking...

Just a little too late; the story of my life. I don't watch Top Chef, but if you heat them you will end up with cooked (perhaps only slightly) rather than raw oysters. I love 'em both, but they are not the same thing.
posted by TedW at 1:17 PM on March 8

Whatever you use, if the oyster doesn't just pop right open, all you usually need to do is twist your knife back and forth and basically drill through the hinge.

See, this is where I wind up with all that oyster shell dust. I'm not sure if I'm not using enough force or if I'm using too much force.

If it matters, it's a good quality oyster knife, not one of those bendy ones. I've previously used a screwdriver when I've bought oysters before.

I sucked at it just as much.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 2:03 PM on March 8

Sometimes those suckers are ALIVE, I always think that on T.V. thay have gamed the process, by say, steaming them or just having plain near dead oysters.

Hold the oyster with a towel, and rock the knife gently to get it in between the shells.

What type of oysters as well? them kumamotos can be a bitch, the virginicas usually don't have as much shell growth over the hinge...
posted by Max Power at 3:07 PM on March 8

I shucked oysters professionally for a while. I hate those ones with the brittle upper shells.

You want to aim your knife downwards, not inwards for these ones. Dig a little bit and you'll get enough space to use torque to pop the shell.

You're at a greater risk to stab the oyster but it'll get these ones open. As you get more experienced, you'll learn how to aim down and miss the oyster, but until then, use a glove or a heavy towel and be patient.
posted by David Fleming at 3:19 PM on March 8 [1 favorite]

Oyster shucking involves a lot of pressure - enough that if you were using a thin blade to do so, you could snap the blade. Similarly, while cooks usually say a sharp knife prevents cuts, the oposite is true with shucking oysters - you have a dull blade because in the entual event where you cause yourself to bleed, you haven't hacked through half your hand. Now this isn't to say that a truly dull oyster knife will open an oyster, because if the crack is tiny enough, you may actually need a slightly thinner oyster knife to get in there.

With each oyster type you wind up doing something slightly different - really it takes a couple of hundred oysters of one type to really set into a good rythm and know an oyster. Even with that under your belt, an experienced shucker is going to be cursing a half dozen or so that they did (the difference is, they will probably get them open after a few curse words).

A word on powdering and breaking the shell. If you dig into the oyster and crack the shell, you will undoubtedly leave a good shard in one of your oysters. Comparative to the soft slimy goodness, this will crack teeth, cut tounges, and otherwise be a major hazard. No matter how soft the shell is, cracking the shell can be worse than failing to open an oyster from a liabilty/ trip to the emergency room standpoint. That doesn't mean throw out the ones where you crack it, but just be damn sure that you don't serve yourself, someone you love, or a customer, a big piece of shell. There is always a preassure point which will result in the oyster popping without making a mess, and yes, just like David Fleming said, with messy shells, its usually a down, twist, straighten, flatten, twist, swizzle, cut, pop to separate the top shell.

Even with a couple hundred thousand (rough guess) of oysters representing maybe 8 or 9 different varietals, I always used a towel for protection... or I shoud say, when I didn't, I paid for it.
posted by Nanukthedog at 6:44 PM on March 8 [2 favorites]

Sometimes those suckers are ALIVE

I thought they were always alive! Except for the dead ones.

Some are big and some are small, and some seem old, I mean, in oyster standards. They have other shells on them, where other animals have moved in. Maybe they're just wiser than other oysters. I didn't buy them where I normally do, I just got them at our regular supermarket, although last time I went to Whole Foods and got a few of a couple different kinds from them, and still had the same trouble.

I gave up on the five from last night, wrapped them in a wet cloth napkin and left them in a bowl in the refrigerator. I'll try when I get I home from work trying to focus on some of your suggestions...the thing that's driving me nuts, though, is that it seems like I'm doing everything right. Maybe I'm doing something I don't realize I'm doing...but it kind of seems like I've got it right. But then, my effort to payoff ratio is so bad I guess I don't.

Maybe I need to yell at them. I'm probably just not intimidating enough.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 3:33 AM on March 9

Dig a little bit and you'll get enough space to use torque to pop the shell.

This seems to be the problem, I can't get enough of a wedge in there...and when I can't get any farther, which happens early on, I twist too early out of desperation and the shell crumbles because it's just that thin lip.

I'm coming in at a little angle, like maybe 20 degrees? Not straight on, not a dramatic angle--pretty much like the guys do in those YouTube videos that taunt me so.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 3:39 AM on March 9

I moved to Florida in November. Since then I personally have consumed 3, 30lb sacks of oysters, a 15lb box, a 2 lb bag, and probably 20 dozen at oyster bars. Seeing that 30 lbs of oysters in a box costs $15, and a dozen in a restaurant costs about $8, I generally buy them and shuck them myself. I'm getting pretty handy at it.

My advice is to get a *good* oyster knife. I bought a couple crappy ones with wide blades for cheap before I got smart and bought a good dexter for about $10. Please don't use a swiss army knife or a paring knife or w/e, they're just not designed for the torque.

The best most important thing I learned was watching the dudes at the bar shuck 'em like mad. It was to hold the oyster in my non-dominant hand, with my palm UP, fingers wrapped around the sides of the oyser, hinge facing me with the point facing up. This gives you great leverage AND greatly increases the chance that you'll skewer the oyster if the blade slips and not your hand. Oh yea, wear a nice heavy leather glove too.

It's also a lot nicer if the oysters are washed, I should have said that---because the joint's a lot easier to find.

First, pop him on the shell a good little rap. It stuns him and convinces him to loosen his pucker.

Anyway, I put the tip of the knife in the hinge and DO NOT GO BACK AND FORTH, I go up and down, pushing in at the same time. You're making space in the hinge. The deeper you get it, the less up and down you can go. Then it's in there pretty good, maybe a quarter of an inch or so, twist. It'll pop open. Now, pull the blade out and wipe it on your palm, you don't want calcium bits in your oyster. Slide the knife in with the curve UP to hug the shell, if your knife has a curve, and twist around the inside of the oyster till he's open. Slide under to cut the connective piece, add the garnish of your choice, and slurp.

Out of a 30lb box there's generally a couple that I just walk away from. I'll toss them on the grill till they JUST open up and eat 'em, they're very good that way too. Just be careful, when you heat the shells they get brittle and extra sharp, if I'm gonna cut myself, that's where I do it.
posted by TomMelee at 5:22 AM on March 9