What should my LED belt buckle say?

January 29, 2009 7:44 AM

What are some clever or entertaining messages I can put on this scrolling LED belt buckle?

5 of the 6 messages can be up to 256 characters, and one can be 512. I'm pretty open to anything here. I already have a few highly personalized ones that have been painstakingly entered solely for the benefit of particular friends, but I'm looking for good messages or quotes to share with the world via my belt. I can do upper or lowercase letters and pretty much any symbol you would find on a standard QWERTY keyboard.

No holds barred here. If it's something you would find amusing in the slightest, please don't hesitate to suggest it.

Unfortunately, I imagine it would be ill-advised to wear such a contraption to graduate school interviews, but if someone out there has a brilliant suggestion for a scrolling belt message that would wow potential advisors, please go ahead and lay it on me.

posted by solipsophistocracy to clothing, beauty, & fashion (84 comments total)

"My face is not down here."
"Dangerously low oxygen levels detected"
"ZOMBIES AHEAD"
"Error 18122309293u727"
posted by Inspector.Gadget at 7:48 AM on January 29

NOT A REPLICANT
NOT A CYLON
NOT A TERMINATOR

well, you're not...right?
posted by cowbellemoo at 7:53 AM on January 29

a long line of recognizable stock quotes?
posted by tybeet at 7:55 AM on January 29 [8 favorites]

What are you studying in grad school? You could do "Ask me about string theory" or similar.
How about the weather? "Forecast: Mon 52/34 Tue 60/43..."
"All pants 50% off"
256 digits of Pi
URL of your blog
posted by JuiceBoxHero at 7:55 AM on January 29

"I'VE GOT A FUCKING LED BELT BUCKLE"
posted by le morte de bea arthur at 7:56 AM on January 29 [27 favorites]

interested? details inside.
posted by zennoshinjou at 7:56 AM on January 29 [7 favorites]

"This space for rent, $10"
posted by Gneisskate at 7:57 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

PANTSOTRON 5000

or

1337 P4N75
posted by burnmp3s at 8:00 AM on January 29

"There is only one thing in life that is really important, taking precedence over all other mundane concerns. This is the principle that under no circumstances should you ever place yourself in a situation in which you feel, even if momentarily, that [MESSAGE REPEATS]"
posted by vacapinta at 8:01 AM on January 29 [8 favorites]

I have one and it made the rounds at a party.

When I got it back someone had programmed "9 INCHES" into it.
posted by ODiV at 8:03 AM on January 29

"Why are you staring at my crotch?"
posted by ND¢ at 8:04 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

Are you going to the party? It's in my pants and everyone is coming.
posted by banannafish at 8:04 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

I PURCHASED AN LED BELT BUCKLE
posted by gum at 8:05 AM on January 29

Bernie's Bar & Grill Happy Hour 5-7...YOUR AD HERE ... PaPa Joe's Pizza Lg 12.99...
"Even my pants are smarter than you."
"Go-Go Gadget Belt Buckle"
Java/python code
"I got my wish. Where's yours?"
posted by JuiceBoxHero at 8:07 AM on January 29

"My parents went to New Caprica and all I got was this lousy belt buckle."
posted by bondcliff at 8:11 AM on January 29

"Dongle not detected"
posted by jonesor at 8:16 AM on January 29 [2 favorites]

Inspector.Gadget beat me to the "ZOMBIES AHEAD" message...

so instead I will provide some one line ascii art, not sure how it'll work on an LED screen. (Google for "one line ascii art" to find cool ones that got eaten by the Metafilter html filter...)

a Koala: @( * O * )@

spider: ///\oo/\\\

for Valentine's Day: »-(¯`·.·´¯)->NAME
posted by jrishel at 8:16 AM on January 29

My eyes are up there

advertise here...555-5555

made you look
posted by agentwills at 8:16 AM on January 29

Watch This Space
posted by pointilist at 8:17 AM on January 29

Eat Here.
posted by willmize at 8:22 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

XKCD Burma Shave?

On Twitter Feeds
An Odd Regression
Ancient Memes
Find New Expression
Burma-Shave!
posted by Comrade_robot at 8:24 AM on January 29

Yes, I have given up on having sex...with other people

(my wife concurs) [not a scrolling LED belt buckle message]
posted by mdevore at 8:29 AM on January 29

"Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Phasellus quis libero. Maecenas eros ante, luctus ac, rhoncus vitae, pretium ac, neque. Morbi vulputate feugiat velit. In hac habitasse platea dictumst. Aliquam libero ipsum, ultricies in, lobortis at, bibendum a, risus. Mauris at pede in nulla tristique vulputate. In sit amet elit id lacus mollis hendrerit. Proin lectus. Phasellus erat. Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia nostra, per inceptos himenaeos."
posted by piratebowling at 8:32 AM on January 29 [5 favorites]

010010010010000001101111011101110110111001111010001000000111010001101000011010010111001100100001
posted by studentbaker at 8:33 AM on January 29

Wait, even better: 0110111101101110011001010111001100100000011000010110111001100100001000000111101001100101011100100110111101110011
posted by studentbaker at 8:35 AM on January 29 [2 favorites]

"OPEN HERE"
posted by Drasher at 8:36 AM on January 29

These are really great so far, folks. Thanks a lot!
posted by solipsophistocracy at 8:48 AM on January 29

Judging by the instructions, you won't be entering much:

1. Power switch is ON/OFF (ENTER), the crust of battery’s seat is anode.
2. Badge can store 6 messages(1 can store 512 characters, 2-6 can store 256 characters), there is only can display any one every time.
3. The power supply for product is CR2032, please change battery when the brightness isn’t enough or can’t display.
Key-press information:
In the natural display, when you press the P-U key, it shows you start to operate the badge and coming into the first grade menu, the key-press control procedure:
adjust “P-U” or “P-D” to select: the switch display info (SWITCH), the input text (INPUT), move-left speed (Speed), brightness control (LUM).
Then press Enter key coming second grade menu:
A. SWITCH: Choice menu (Total 6 pages), choose the display information.

But if you do figure it out, I think "CHASTITY" would be an apt message to display.
posted by pracowity at 8:59 AM on January 29

Free Breathalyzer
posted by Andy's Gross Wart at 9:01 AM on January 29 [3 favorites]

YES. I ACTUALLY BOUGHT THIS.
posted by pmbuko at 9:01 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

ATTENTION WHORE.
posted by the littlest brussels sprout at 9:16 AM on January 29 [5 favorites]

MASSIVE TOOL
posted by dzot at 9:17 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

NO DISASSEMBLE
posted by fire&wings at 9:20 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

NO KILL I
posted by ROU_Xenophobe at 9:24 AM on January 29

IT WAS A GIFT
posted by IndigoJones at 9:31 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

ASK ME ABOUT MY LED BELT BUCKLE
posted by BobbyVan at 9:35 AM on January 29 [5 favorites]

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
posted by Caduceus at 9:43 AM on January 29

the man ^ the legend v
posted by raisingsand at 9:45 AM on January 29 [2 favorites]

"All pants 50% off"

Works best if you're wearing shorts.

DEFAULT MESSAGE

SPRING BREAK!

I AM ERROR

12:00
posted by fidelity at 9:45 AM on January 29

GREETINGS I AM FROM 2002 WHER IS THE ELECTROCLASH PARTY
posted by Potomac Avenue at 9:46 AM on January 29 [8 favorites]

or combining mine and fidelity's

SPRING BREAK 2002
posted by Potomac Avenue at 9:47 AM on January 29

Felt Fuckle
posted by nomad at 9:51 AM on January 29

God damn these electric sex pants!
posted by ecurtz at 10:02 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

CAN YOU HELP ME GET THIS THING OFF
posted by nanojath at 10:03 AM on January 29 [1 favorite]

I'M JUST HAPPY TO HAVE AN LED BELT BUCKLE
posted by nanojath at 10:04 AM on January 29

INGREDIENTS: glucose-fructose, snips, snails, puppy-dog tails, caffeine, natural flavor

My other belt buckle is a Toshiba

USA! USA! USA!

HELLO! My name is [solipsophistocracy].

Ask me about our extended warranty.

LIVES REMAINING: ****
posted by cardboard at 10:04 AM on January 29

UP UP DOWN DOWN LEFT RIGHT LEFT RIGHT B A START
posted by Faint of Butt at 10:09 AM on January 29 [2 favorites]

"slide to unlock"
posted by fijiwriter at 10:11 AM on January 29

I eat paste.

I didn't buy this.

Yes, I am this pathetic.

Necrophilia FTW

FTFY

Tilt
posted by ambient2 at 10:39 AM on January 29

Underwear, then pants.
posted by idiotfactory at 11:16 AM on January 29

The Sun God sure is a fun God...Ra, Ra, Ra

--------

Shift to the Left,
Shift to the Right,
Push Down,
Pop Up,
Byte, Byte, Byte
posted by Confess, Fletch at 11:19 AM on January 29

DON'T MESS WITH ROBO-TEXAS
posted by Comrade_robot at 12:00 PM on January 29 [3 favorites]

No, its not a gun in my pocket.
No, its not a banana in my pocket.
Yes, I am happy to see you.
posted by Reverend John at 12:04 PM on January 29

▼ positions available... inquire within ▼
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 12:16 PM on January 29

PC LOAD LETTER
posted by hangashore at 12:33 PM on January 29

How's my walking? Call 1-800-LED-PANTS.
posted by chairface at 12:35 PM on January 29

GREETINGS I AM FROM 2002 WHER IS THE ELECTROCLASH PARTY
posted by Potomac Avenue at 9:46 AM on January 29 [1 favorite +] [!]

I'm sorry. This says it all. (I feel like I need to say it, because I would want you to tell me.)
posted by KAS at 12:35 PM on January 29

I wasn't trying to be snarky I genuinely would lol if I saw that on an LED buckle. This thread is making my life better. Let's do some more.

I HOLD UP THE PANTS
posted by Potomac Avenue at 1:19 PM on January 29

A problem has been detected and Windows has been shut down to prevent damage to your pants.
posted by shinybeast at 1:20 PM on January 29

"PLEASE DON'T TALK TO ME ABOUT MY LED BELT BUCKLE. JUST PRETEND YOU DON'T SEE IT."
posted by ND¢ at 1:26 PM on January 29

"SERIOUSLY, I'M A LITTLE EMBARRASSED ABOUT PURCHASING IT, BUT I FEEL LIKE IT WOULD BE WASTEFUL NOT TO WEAR IT SINCE I SPENT LIKE $20 BUCKS ON IT, SO I WOULD REALLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU WOULD JUST IGNORE IT. THANK YOU."
posted by ND¢ at 1:32 PM on January 29

"OKAY, YOU SEEM TO, DESPITE MY MESSAGES, STILL BE STARING AT MY BELT BUCKLE. I KNOW THAT LED BELT BUCKLES ARE DESIGNED TO DRAW THE EYE, AND THAT I AM USING IT TO COMMUNICATE WITH YOU, SO I AM, IN PART, RESPONSIBLE FOR YOU CONTINUING TO READ WHAT I HAVE ENTERED INTO IT, BUT I THINK THAT BY THIS POINT YOU SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN THE MESSAGE AND JUST MOVED ON. YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING MORE INTERESTING GOING ON IN YOUR LIFE THAN AN LED BELT BUCKLE?
posted by ND¢ at 1:37 PM on January 29

OKAY, SORRY. I SHOULD NOT HAVE LASHED OUT AT YOU. IT IS JUST THAT I AM REALLY KICKING MYSELF FOR BUYING THIS STUPID THING AND YOU STARING AT IT IS JUST EXACERBATING THAT FEELING. BUT I KNOW THAT THIS IS REALLY MY PROBLEM AND NOT YOURS.
posted by ND¢ at 1:37 PM on January 29

YOU KNOW WHAT? FUCK THAT. STOP STARING AT MY BELT BUCKLE JERK!
posted by ND¢ at 1:39 PM on January 29

Um, it can do lowercase too, but, like I said, not more than 512 characters.
posted by solipsophistocracy at 1:42 PM on January 29

CAPITAL LETTERS JUST SEEM MORE FUTURISTIC.
posted by ND¢ at 1:45 PM on January 29 [3 favorites]

Lowercase isn't funny. You want all caps, my friend.
posted by the littlest brussels sprout at 1:49 PM on January 29

IT CAN DO LOWERCASE TOO
posted by Potomac Avenue at 2:08 PM on January 29 [4 favorites]

EVERY YEAR WE GET A CROCKETY BLOAT
posted by Potomac Avenue at 2:10 PM on January 29

IMPULSE BUYER
posted by box at 2:26 PM on January 29

The same thing I would put on any sign space I had access to:

IT BURNS WHEN I PEE
posted by Brak at 2:27 PM on January 29

Nope, I can't cotton to lowercase on an LED belt buckle.

Oh, and

AS YOU CAN SEE I STILL HAVE DISPOSABLE INCOME. MAY I BUY YOU A DRINK?
posted by nanojath at 2:47 PM on January 29

THESE WORDS CIRCUMNAVIGATE MY GUT REGULARLY. DO YOU FEEL DIRTY READING THEM?
posted by lalochezia at 2:57 PM on January 29

My pops and his nerdy friends back in the day used to write things like NIAGARA FALLS over their fly on their bell bottoms. This is that nerd potential now.
posted by psylosyren at 3:00 PM on January 29

I'M TOO SEXY FOR MY PANTS

(ducks)

But people WILL laugh. You kids can mail me for an explanation of what I'm talking about.
posted by nanojath at 3:41 PM on January 29 [1 favorite]

IF THIS BELT BUCKLE COULD TALK...
posted by nanojath at 3:42 PM on January 29

"Ceci n'est pas une boucle de ceinture."
"Cannot unbuckle: [A]bort, [R]etry, [F]ail?"
"This message could be longer if I had LED suspende"
"I'd rather not be wearing pants."
"Yes there's a battery in my pocket, but I'm still happy to see you."
"I programmed this belt buckle in C*)Y%RONVODHOAFHASOFHASOLHAOSHFASF"
"I should really have thought of something clever before I bought this."
posted by quarantine at 4:44 PM on January 29

If you're this close, you can feel free to blow me
posted by Unicorn on the cob at 5:01 PM on January 29

403-FORBIDDEN if you're aloof.
or
404-NOT FOUND if self-deprecation is more your thing.
posted by ODiV at 5:10 PM on January 29

$100 DOLLARS BUYS THIS BELT! LOST ALL MONEY IN THE STOCK MARKET
posted by IndigoJones at 5:18 PM on January 29

1-202-456-1111

FREE HUGS

You know, Metafilter made fun of this belt buckle, but I think it's nifty, don't you?

AT LEAST I IZ NOT FEDORA

waist of space
posted by fidelity at 5:40 PM on January 29

This is why we can't have nice things.

Limp Home Mode

We Know You're Cute, You Told Us
posted by vers at 4:37 AM on January 30

chmod +rwx yourmom
posted by Marisa Stole the Precious Thing at 5:27 AM on January 30

Obama is President and I have an LED belt! Change has come!
posted by knapah at 7:22 AM on January 30