What are some masculine styles for long hair?

January 28, 2009 11:07 AM

I'm a guy with fairly long hair (halfway down my back long). Currently I have two styles: Tied back in a ponytail and not tied back. What else can I do with my hair that won't be too feminine-looking? I'm looking for short-term things, not long term things like dreadlocks.
posted by xchmp to clothing, beauty, & fashion (60 comments total)

Cut it?
posted by Midnight Rambler at 11:08 AM on January 28 [4 favorites has favorites]

I know you don't want to hear this, but cut it. Cut your hair.
posted by billysumday at 11:09 AM on January 28 [2 favorites has favorites]

And really, I'm not being snarky. There just are no masculine styles for long hair, or at least there haven't been since the 80s. Men with long hair look typically - typically, not always - look as though they are trying to relive earlier days of hedonistic rock glory. It's not a good look.
posted by billysumday at 11:11 AM on January 28

It would be somewhat rude, normally, for anyone to tell you to cut your hair. But given your thought to "not be too feminine-looking", I have to nth cutting it.

/if you're in a band, all bets are off.
posted by demagogue at 11:22 AM on January 28

also not trying to be a jerk here, but there is clearly a reason why you've resorted to asking strangers on the internet what else you might do with your hair; there is nothing! shall i suggest pigtails? definitely cut your hair if you aren't happy with the two choices you have. i honestly can't think of a single other style there is, apart from perhaps some variation of the usual ponytail.
posted by austere at 11:26 AM on January 28

I used to have long guy hair. A bandanna is about your only other option but that's only really appropriate if you gardening or painting. Otherwise, it's ponytail or loose. You're a guy - you have limited hair options.
posted by GuyZero at 11:27 AM on January 28

You could set the tips of it on fire, like Blackbeard. That was pretty... uh... manly.
posted by wfrgms at 11:27 AM on January 28 [4 favorites has favorites]

Though it would be rude to suggest someone cut their hair in person, the internet helps us say things we otherwise might imagine are discourteous. I have a friend/coworker who has ridiculously long hair, and I would never tell him to cut it or suggest to him that he needs a haircut, but hot damn, that dude really needs to cut his hair. Sometimes the anonymity of the interwebs is the best way to tell someone what they really need to hear. We're here to help!
posted by billysumday at 11:30 AM on January 28

Braid it? Just one long braid. I have a good (male) friend that does this sometimes. I don't think he looks terribly feminine. Of course, he has a fairly male face and a moustache...
posted by R343L at 11:35 AM on January 28

The maximum manageable length for a dude is shoulder length, maybe a little past. I think you should cut it to this length. I think a close-trimmed full beard is a good accompaniment to longer hair, and your flickr user icon shows that you are already partway there! As far as styling goes, there's not really much you can do besides a ponytail unless you are trying to look like you're in costume.
posted by mkb at 11:35 AM on January 28

You could do a topknot, samurai style or wrapped in a Sikh style turban (or just tucked under a baseball cap).
posted by infinitywaltz at 11:36 AM on January 28 [1 favorite has favorites]

Are you my doppleganger? I got hair that long - and it's going to get chopped soon - I just don't see any other way about it.
posted by Calloused_Foot at 11:36 AM on January 28

Don't wash it for a week, add cigarette, cowboy hat and sunglasses, a la Al Jourgensen circa 1994. Problem solved.
posted by milarepa at 11:38 AM on January 28

You could also put a bunch of hairspray in it and tease it straight up, like this guy. That's an option, not necessarily a recommendation, incidentally.
posted by infinitywaltz at 11:38 AM on January 28 [1 favorite has favorites]

Can we assume that I'm comfortable with the level (or lack) of masculinity my hair currently affords me? My question isn't about how to look awesomely masculine with my girly long hair. After all, I have girly long hair. I'm fine with options that are somewhat feminine - ie. having long hair tied back in a ponytail. I was just, you know, wondering if there are any other styles that are around the same place on the masuline/feminine spectrum. ("There are none" is a reasonable answer. "Cut your hair!" is not.)
posted by xchmp at 11:38 AM on January 28 [3 favorites has favorites]

I guess it depends on the circles you travel in, but where I live braids on men are not terribly uncommon on men (long hair on men is pretty common here) and I don't associate braids with being feminine. Helps that most long haired men here have beards, I guess. But then, I'm surrounded by hippies.

/long-haired, sometimes-braided, bearded semi-hippie speaking here
posted by Emanuel at 11:40 AM on January 28

What about a hat?

A little Fedora can go a long way...
posted by MatJ at 11:41 AM on January 28 [1 favorite has favorites]

Long hair on men is incredibly dated, unstylish, and generally unattractive. Billysumday summarized it well. Cut your hair.
posted by Kololo at 11:41 AM on January 28

Oh, and I'm not saying you should cut your hair because it's unmasculine or too feminine. I'm saying you should cut it because you want to style your attractively, and there is no way to do that without cutting it.
posted by Kololo at 11:43 AM on January 28

To give good strategy suggestions, one needs to know what the goals are. What are your goals here? Are you just bored? Is your hair annoying you in some way?

If bored: maybe dye parts of it different colors? Make a few small braids, maybe add some beads? (note: I would not do this with my own hair).

If annoyed: maybe braid just the front, on both sides, in small "hold back from face" locks. This might make you look more girly, but it's all I can think of.
posted by amtho at 11:44 AM on January 28

For god's sake people, of course there are other things he can do with his hair. Being rude and unhelpful over the internet is still rude and unhelpful.

ahem.

Tough-biker-type dudes I know with long hair will often do the ponytail thing (a low ponytail, tightly tied), then braid that very tightly. I have often seen this style sitting higher on the head (ie, not tied at the nape of the neck). I didn't think it looked very girly, but the men in question probably couldn't look girly if they tried, which is more of an answer to your question I think: how you dress and carry yourself are more important than what you do with your hair in the girly/not girly spectrum.
posted by frobozz at 11:46 AM on January 28 [3 favorites has favorites]

If cutting your hair is really not an option, then a single braid (as already suggested) is the only thing I can think of, particularly if your hair is fairly thick. If your hair is rather thin, then a braid may just look a little weedy or rat-taily; it might be masculine enough, but not particularly attractive.

But yeah. Even if you want to keep the long hair, shoulder-length is the way to go.
posted by scody at 11:46 AM on January 28

Braids
posted by syntheticfaith at 11:47 AM on January 28

Options:

- Wear a hat.
- Multiple braids.
- One long braid. (really doesn't look particularly girly if you otherwise look masculine)

The samurai-style top-knot looks fine if you're doing something where you need to get your hair out of the way, but it looks kind of silly out on the street.

There aren't that many other possibilities. Architectural, dainty, and high-maintenance styles are considered "feminine." "Masculine" is defined as low-maintenance and practical. Fuck 'em all who say that long hair looks feminine, as this is a very recent development relating to the militarization of our country around WWII. When I think of the colonial times and even a long while after, they pretty much all had long-ish hair. Then again, even back then, if they weren't wearing powdered wigs, they had it tied back with a simple ribbon, and that was it.
posted by explosion at 11:49 AM on January 28 [1 favorite has favorites]

I had long hair with cornrows that looked pretty gangsta
posted by saxamo at 11:52 AM on January 28

I'd go for the low braid. Keep your face naked: native american stylee, or double it with a tache n' beard combo: viking!

As for length or no, personally I find long haired men sexay - so long as it's well-washed and trimmed.
posted by freya_lamb at 11:55 AM on January 28

Bill Choisser's "Keeping Long Hair Neat" and "How People Feel About Long Hair."
posted by cmyers at 11:59 AM on January 28

Yeesh, everyone. Are we all to look the same, then? Prescribe to the same notions of masculine, feminine, pretty, handsome? Sometimes I am just so fucking tired of all of these goddamn 'What not to wear/How to look like everyone else' shows/paradigms and how they poison even the most interesting and enlightened circles that I just want to lay down for how many decades it takes for it to be all over.

To answer your question (fwiw I am a female, born in the early 70s, who has worn every sort of hairstyle, but mostly longish, and has happily dated all manner men who fall all over the hirsute continuum and has a partner of 10 years with floppy hair and a beard):

This guy is stone cold awesome and presents and option

Try gathering half your hair loosely from the tops of your ears to into a loose band/half pony in the middle back of your head, from there you could gather again into a low pony at your nape, or leave it all free

I've seen, and liked, dudes make tiny braids from each temple to the same spot in the middle back of the head and join them

You may not be interested in dreads, but you may like dread wraps to keep things together and off your face

Two ponies, closer to together than women traditional wear, and at the nape are another option--you could partially braid them a few hitches down for another look

Rock on, brother bear.
posted by rumposinc at 12:00 PM on January 28 [1 favorite has favorites]

There are none.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 12:01 PM on January 28 [3 favorites has favorites]

Fuck 'em all who say that long hair looks feminine, as this is a very recent development relating to the militarization of our country around WWII.

Wha? How does David Lee Roth fit into that equation. It doesn't have anything to do with the militarization of our culture and everything to do with the great hairbands of the 1980s. In contemporary western society, men with long hair do not evoke the greats of ancient civilization but rather the drummer for the Scorpions.

And if I had to choose from the options presented above, I'd have to throw my lot behind covering it up with a bandana or a hat.
posted by billysumday at 12:02 PM on January 28 [2 favorites has favorites]

I believe the best solution is what I can only refer to as the MacReady Beard (hotlink).
posted by Benjy at 12:03 PM on January 28

What about somethin like this? (I'm serious.)
posted by goethean at 12:03 PM on January 28

Benjy, that is freaking awesome. Although, that's shoulder length and not half-way down the back length. What a beard!
posted by billysumday at 12:07 PM on January 28

Braiding keeps it from tangling as much. Nice tight queue looks perfectly respectable on a guy.

My partner doesn't like it, but keeps to the ponytail. My best friend's husband does queue his. I disagree with his wood-tone hairclips, though.
posted by cobaltnine at 12:20 PM on January 28

the half-ponytail where you just loosely gather the hair from the top and tie it at the back of the head, leaving the sides and back loose can be pretty good. The trick to having that not look too girly is for it to be just the tiniest bit messy. brush it first, and then pull it back with your hands, not with a brush. It should be generally neat, but not perfect. Having a few layers cut near the ends will help give it some body.

and don't bother with all these cut your hair folks - if you like it long, keep it long, it's your damn head!
posted by 5_13_23_42_69_666 at 12:21 PM on January 28 [1 favorite has favorites]

"Darlin', don't you go and cut your hair."

I saw a guy the other day who parted his hair down the middle, and then wrapped each side up and around his head. It was sort of weird, but cool looking. I guess this is kind of like Sikh-style? Sorry, I can't find a picture...
posted by solipsophistocracy at 12:25 PM on January 28

I've seen a couple guys really loosely put their hair up on a bun and then secure it with some chopsticks. It's didn't look too feminine. Of course it didn't really look good either...

My friend's little brother just didn't wash (with shampoo and conditioner that is he got it wet) his hair or brush it for several months so that it didn't look all shiny and girly. Once again, definitely didn't look feminine, but not something I would suggest.

I would suggest just shoving it up in a hat and calling it a day.
posted by whoaali at 12:27 PM on January 28

In my experience with hair of the same length, you have few options. For some reason, a ponytail with something gel-like in it, to make your hair shiny, is viewed as more masculine than hair without shiny stuff. You don't have to go for a full-on queue or anything, but consider an additional factor: the more tightly-confined the hair, the more masculine appearance. Compare the simple one-scrunchy ponytail versus the bad-ass samurai hair bondage.

Therefore, gel or some kind of hair-enshinifying substance and a fairly severely-drawn ponytail.

This would work better if your hair is straight; mine is not, so oiling and its variants were not a options which worked well for me. Shaving at night ensures enough scruff that the rate at which you may be perceived as feminine should decrease.
posted by adipocere at 12:28 PM on January 28

I've had guy friends who could get away with putting it up in a topknot/bun, held with pencil/chopstick/hairstick. This is obviously very much a personality thing.

One friend of mine dyed very thin locks of hair a deep purple. It was subtle and looked cool.

Braid, as mentioned upthread. I know several dudes with braided pigtails, but they're of a decidedly hippie bent.

As long you wash it and the ends are trimmed so that you're not all scraggly, keep your hair long if you want to. FFS, people, you're not required to answer the question if you don't have any legit answers.
posted by desuetude at 12:33 PM on January 28

Holy cats — if you're happy, ignore the haters who tell you to cut your hair instead of directly answering your question. Your hair's your hair.

Learn to braid hair and then try different configurations/arrangements of braids on and around your head. You don't have to go with numerous small work-intensive braids or long-term dreads; large braids are fine. Braiding hair is quick for the experienced and you can undo and redo as needed, every day if you want.

I've seen plenty of guys with masculine-looking varying braided styles. Subjectively I think the look is an improvement on loose or unkempt long hair. Just avoid the prom-night tiara look.
posted by jeeves at 12:37 PM on January 28

Half-up and half-down. Like this. Or this. I know those examples are women (as am I) but I think it's appropriately masculine as well.

Comb all your hair toward the back of your head like you would for a ponytail. Using your thumbs, start at your ears and pick up the top half of your hair into a ponytail. Secure with an elastic holder. Done! This hairstyle might not work well if you have curly hair, but for straight hair I think it could be a nice option.
posted by meggan at 12:54 PM on January 28

Pony tail wraps (a few inches long and leather) are available from some biker supply sources. A very plain one would be nice. I've seen Native American guys with similar.
posted by Morrigan at 12:57 PM on January 28

OK, I won't say to cut it (even though I'm thinking "cut it, PLEASE"), but here are my observations: I've seen a lot of guys with long hair or a lot of facial hair who are good looking, but you can't see that they are because of all that hair, and you just dismiss them at first and second and third glance because only when you get up close do you notice that they have a nice smile and nice eyes. If those guys just cut their hair or trimmed their beard, they would immediately be noticed. Not saying you have to go totally clean-cut, but everyone looks better if they look a little more up-kept.

I like hats. You can either keep your hair down or do a really low loose ponytail so it doesn't get in the way of the hat. The hat will make it look like a totally new style.
posted by KateHasQuestions at 1:25 PM on January 28

Thanks for your suggestions everyone (well, everyone who actually had suggestions...) I'll definitely be trying some of these out.
posted by xchmp at 1:26 PM on January 28

I had long hair for a long time, and nearly always wore it in a tight braid (I used hair ties at both top and bottom to keep it that way.)
posted by Zed at 1:55 PM on January 28

I've kind of found myself where you are. In tail. Not in tail.

Or embrace hedonistic rock glory! Er, or something like that.
posted by Kid Charlemagne at 2:43 PM on January 28

Wow, why the cut chorus? Is this 1960? Honestly.

My brother up until very recently (did the locks of love thing) had hair longer than mine, and he typically kept it in a single braid. He would french braid it for more formal occasions (and an inside-out french braid looks a little more badass, though its more difficult to execute well). It never looked particularly feminine, but then again, he is also over 6" tall and has a full beard to match. I've seen other long-haired guys with a simple braid as well, and it's always looked nice, so that would be my recommendation for everyday wear.
posted by internet!Hannah at 3:01 PM on January 28

Oh, and my longhaired uncle pulls the top half of his hair back, either in a ponytail or in a braid, with the bottom half down loose.
posted by internet!Hannah at 3:04 PM on January 28

Go to a hairdresser, having long hair isn't an excuse to have no haircut. Get your ends trimmed, a little layering put in to lift it, but subtle, they should know what to do.

Here is a blog on long male hairstyles, but please note their idea of "long", it's moved up to at most shoulderlength.

Some here too.

This place has more links, including to the "Men's Long Hair Hyperboard", a community for guys with long hair.
posted by Iteki at 3:23 PM on January 28

Well, David Beckham does THIS, and it works for him.

Long hair slicked back with gel and THEN pulled back in a ponytail, as suggested by adipocere, is a very sophisticated look that will work when you are "dressed up". I'd suggest a nondescript black hair tie, a wide one like this, for that look, rather than something skimpy and thin as a rubber band.

I think your hair would need to be slightly shorter, and it's best if you have strong bone structure to pull either of these looks off, though. If you just like your hair "long" but don't really have a specific length you like, you might want to consider trimming off a few inches to give you more options (NOT LONG HAIRIST).

If you keep your hair long but at least have the ends trimmed every 4-6 weeks, rather than let it go completely natural, it won't look as unkempt, so wearing it down becomes more doable.
posted by misha at 3:24 PM on January 28

The same way that anything looks good on a supermodel, Becks can do things with his hair and clothes that no mere mortal may attempt without looking foolish. That particular hairstyle is also popular among long-haired female soccer players. I'm not sure how well it works off the pitch, but it is certainly an option.
posted by GuyZero at 3:59 PM on January 28

My dad likes to tie it back into a ponytail, low on the neck, then around halfway down the ponytail, add another ponytail holder. It keeps it more neat and together.

Rather than cheapo elastic ponytail holders, go for leather cords? A bit "urban primitive", sure, but if you can pull it off, it does look nice.

Of course, if you're pale and thin and have long blonde hair and slightly pointy ears, you could go for the Legolas look. Hell, end up in the right convention/geek gathering and you'd pretty much not want for company.

Or if you have really blonde hair, wear it down and back with a pimp cane as your accessory, hit another just right geek gathering, and you'll be fighting them off with that pimp cane.

But, God, don't listen to people who tell you to cut it. Trim it, yes, definitely, but don't cut it. Especially if it has a tendency to go totally curly when it's short. Part of the reason why my dad has long hair is because he ends up with ringlets. Which look awesome when you're a teenager, less awesome when you're a granddad.
posted by Katemonkey at 3:59 PM on January 28

I'm with the single braid folks. Do please make sure it's really well trimmed. Long hair with scraggly ends looks bad on anybody.
posted by theora55 at 4:29 PM on January 28

Comme ça?
posted by ocherdraco at 4:59 PM on January 28 [1 favorite has favorites]

Yeah, you don't need to cut your hair. That really isn't helpful.

You can vary the height of the ponytail and whether you part it or not. The half ponytail is also a good solution

My brother had long hair for a long time, and my favorite way that he did his hair was center part, pulled into a ponytail at the nape of the neck, but then styled the ponytail into a messy bun (my apologies for the annoying teenage girls in the video). The messy bun is an awesome and masculine alternative, if done right.

John Butler has long hair (albeit in dreads), and my brother often emulated his hairstyles, because they were just that awesome.
posted by messylissa at 5:08 PM on January 28

Despite my screen name I'm a male and my hair falls well below my shoulders. Whenever I wear my hair in two braids I always get compliments from strangers on the style.
posted by Sailormom at 5:43 PM on January 28

Don't cut it unless you want to.

It doesn't look feminine if it grows out of your chin.

It also doesn't look feminine growing out of your nose, ears, or eyebrows, but those are harder to do flatteringly.

I usually wear mine tied somewhere in back with a rubber band or two. Sometimes I will braid it. For a few years I could tie it in a bun/knot with one hand and it would stay for a while with no attachments. This was convenient. Recently I overdid it trimming some ends, and I can't do that freehanded bun again yet.

If you have a female friend, ask her to help you style it. This is probably how Beckham came to his (intriguing-looking) girls-soccer-player set of ponytails.

If/when you have a little girl, let her style it. Pink plastic Cinderella clasps all over make you invincible.
posted by fantabulous timewaster at 6:10 PM on January 28 [1 favorite has favorites]

Unkempt is unflattering, so find a stylist you can trust to help you keep it in tiptop shape. Get regular trims and ask them for styling tips.

If your hair's got some natural curliness to it, a simple bandana tie can look great, especially with nicer fabrics than your typical snotrag. Something like this dude with hair poking out in back.

On the beard subject, I'd say stay away from both extremes and go for a manly close-clipped beard. Jeremiah Johnson and Legolas Greenleaf you are not.

Oh, and +1 for ocherdraco: nothing undignified or unmasculine about that look!
posted by fracas at 9:18 PM on January 28

If you're going to do a single braid, club the end instead of leaving a little paintbrush tail.

To do this, stop braiding about two inches from the end, fold the tail up into the braid, wrap the tip around itself a couple of times, and then wrap your hair tie/elastic around that.

It makes a neat tip, hides any straggly ends, and doesn't make you look like a girl from the back.

If you're planning to travel back in time and go to sea, you can dip the last inch in tar, but I don't recommend that for a modern landlubber.
posted by Sallyfur at 5:49 AM on January 29 [1 favorite has favorites]

Ignore the just-cut-it folks. If you like your hair long, the only real reason to cut it shorter than that is if it's too damaged. I've got hair to my waist, and many of my male friends have reasonably long hair as well.

Other than wearing it down or back in a ponytail, the styles I see most often are pulled back in a single braid, or half-back (Bring your fingers back from the top of your ears to grab the half of your hair from the front and sides of your head (that might normally fall in your face), leaving the hair from the back of your head down. Pull the front-half of your hair back as if you were putting it in a ponytail, and secure it with a barrette or hair clip at the back of the head or nape of the neck.), and sometimes contained/held back with a bandana.
posted by JiBB at 12:00 PM on November 25