The where, what, and how much of massaging euphemisms
October 22, 2004 12:06 PM
I'm pretty clear what the phrase "massage with release" means, but is it code language for male-on-male action? 2. If so, is there equivalent code language for female masseuse - male client activity? 3. How do you go about locating a masseuse or establishment that offers these services? Finally, how much would a person expect to pay for this?
Yes there is a site called "World Sex Guide" (I'm at work and don't want a hundred popups. Try worldsexguide.org first I believe. Actually it's been forever since I stumbled on it, I hope it's not been converted to a porn portal).
Anyway the site has a collection of prostitution advice from all over the world, including pretty much any major and minor city within the US. By reading it you'd get a clue on how to find and obtain such services. Last time I remember being there most articles were pretty out of date (at the time it was featured on 20/20 or something similar), but it is the world's oldest profession and even though the names/places will most likely not be there -- if you read enough of it you'll get an idea of what you need to do to get some ass.
posted by geoff. at 12:15 PM on October 22, 2004
Anyway the site has a collection of prostitution advice from all over the world, including pretty much any major and minor city within the US. By reading it you'd get a clue on how to find and obtain such services. Last time I remember being there most articles were pretty out of date (at the time it was featured on 20/20 or something similar), but it is the world's oldest profession and even though the names/places will most likely not be there -- if you read enough of it you'll get an idea of what you need to do to get some ass.
posted by geoff. at 12:15 PM on October 22, 2004
I remember seeing a website that reviewed these sorts of places, and if you read the reviews, you get a really good idea of what to say/when to say it, and how much to expect to spend.
Where I live (philly burbs) there are dozens of these places in strip shopping centers, mostly they're called "oriental spa" or some such. That might be googlable.
On preview, geoff. is talking about the same site I am.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 12:19 PM on October 22, 2004
Where I live (philly burbs) there are dozens of these places in strip shopping centers, mostly they're called "oriental spa" or some such. That might be googlable.
On preview, geoff. is talking about the same site I am.
posted by stupidsexyFlanders at 12:19 PM on October 22, 2004
Most alternative newspapers have ads in the back for escorts (sex) and massage (hand jobs). One ad in the paper I've got today has a "excellent full body sensual nude massage with a release" for $100/half hour. You could also try Craigslist or Google.
posted by kirkaracha at 1:13 PM on October 22, 2004
posted by kirkaracha at 1:13 PM on October 22, 2004
worldsexguide.org is the right place. main page just barely SFW, other pages NSFW at all. A lot of the info is contained in the forums at wsgforum.com. In 2002 the going rate for a "massage" in San Francisco [US] was $40-50 for a half-hour massage or $60-120 for an hour. I think that is the total. Usually there is some sort of "house fee" up front of $50. You'll want to know some abbrevations before you start reading the forums. You can also use some of those abbreviations on Google to figure out where all the other escort sites are.
posted by jessamyn at 3:08 PM on October 22, 2004
posted by jessamyn at 3:08 PM on October 22, 2004
For spas in Atlanta, buy the local newspaper (AJC) and look on the next last page of the sports section. I have that holds for other major cities as well.
In those ads:
Oriental staff = handjobs, bjs and possibly fucking, $40 per half hour + tip ($50, $100, $200+)
American staff = handjobs only, $100+ per half hour + tip ($50)
Prices approximate.
posted by mischief at 3:27 PM on October 22, 2004
In those ads:
Oriental staff = handjobs, bjs and possibly fucking, $40 per half hour + tip ($50, $100, $200+)
American staff = handjobs only, $100+ per half hour + tip ($50)
Prices approximate.
posted by mischief at 3:27 PM on October 22, 2004
Mischief: How on earth do you possibly find out things like that?
posted by Mwongozi at 3:41 PM on October 22, 2004
posted by Mwongozi at 3:41 PM on October 22, 2004
There's a "Spa" right across the street from our office. On slow days we like to watch the folk go in and out.
We keep wanting someone to go over and check the place out, but never get anyone to work up the nerve.
You can get pricing here.
posted by jazon at 3:45 PM on October 22, 2004
We keep wanting someone to go over and check the place out, but never get anyone to work up the nerve.
You can get pricing here.
posted by jazon at 3:45 PM on October 22, 2004
Any massage place that advertises its "all-female staff" and all-male clientele in the alternative newspaper is a place where one can get "release" or "special massage" or "happy ending" or "extras" or "special services".
Another tip is what the masseuses are wearing--if they're wearing halter tops and Daisy Dukes, feel comfortable about asking the masseuse if she provides "extras" or "special services". Generally, one negotiates such things directly with the masseuse, and pays her directly in cash (though the "massage fee" may have to be paid to the receptionist, and could well be charged to a credit card).
However, if you go into a massage parlor and find that the staff is wearing crisp, starched whites and a New Age soundtrack is playing on the boom box, just enjoy the relaxing rubdown, because there will be no handjobs for you.
If you are in Boston or Providence, there will be no penis-in-vagina in any massage parlor, no matter how much cash you offer, and you're damned unlikely to get a blowjob. Pressing staff members to reverse their decisions on that will get you a quick introduction to some guy named Vinny, who will show you quite firmly to your car.
posted by Sidhedevil at 7:42 PM on October 22, 2004
Another tip is what the masseuses are wearing--if they're wearing halter tops and Daisy Dukes, feel comfortable about asking the masseuse if she provides "extras" or "special services". Generally, one negotiates such things directly with the masseuse, and pays her directly in cash (though the "massage fee" may have to be paid to the receptionist, and could well be charged to a credit card).
However, if you go into a massage parlor and find that the staff is wearing crisp, starched whites and a New Age soundtrack is playing on the boom box, just enjoy the relaxing rubdown, because there will be no handjobs for you.
If you are in Boston or Providence, there will be no penis-in-vagina in any massage parlor, no matter how much cash you offer, and you're damned unlikely to get a blowjob. Pressing staff members to reverse their decisions on that will get you a quick introduction to some guy named Vinny, who will show you quite firmly to your car.
posted by Sidhedevil at 7:42 PM on October 22, 2004
"Mischief: How on earth do you possibly find out things like that?"
With a name like Mischief, you have to ask?
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:58 PM on October 22, 2004
With a name like Mischief, you have to ask?
posted by mr_crash_davis at 7:58 PM on October 22, 2004
Mwong: Before we married, my now exwife was a prostitute. We decided to get married during a weekend getaway with AUS (Atlanta United Swingers). My current best 'friend' is a former stripper. I messed around with the transvestite lifestyle for a few months in the 80s. Read my comment in the male shaving thread.
You only get one life to live, darling. Get the picture? ;-P
posted by mischief at 9:52 PM on October 22, 2004
You only get one life to live, darling. Get the picture? ;-P
posted by mischief at 9:52 PM on October 22, 2004
"I have no idea what people pay for this or how they ask for it"
As for the second part, at an American spa, the girls do not want you to state explicitly what you want. Instead, you move her hand to the precise location you want massaged. Once there, you state your offer and if she agrees, she will nod.
At an Oriental spa, it's just the opposite. First, you pay for the room/massage. Then, your girl will bathe you. Then she will ask what you would like. Tell her explicitly. If she wants to do what you want to do, make your offer. She will counteroffer. Split the difference and you're in.
If it's your first time at that establishment, you may only get a handjob. On subsequent visits, tell your greeter you have been there before. They will remember you, and you will be able to get higher quality services.
Things will vary a bit from place to place but that's roughly what happens.
As for lingerie modelling, those are jack joints. You get a chair and a box of tissues. Your model will tease you and say things like "I'll show you my boobs for $10," "I'll take off my panties for $30," "I'll get closer to you for $40." You'll blow over $100 and the model will never touch you. Self-service only.
In my opinion, all adult entertainment places are too expensive for a simple orgasm. The biggest ripoffs are lingerie modelling and American-staff spas. If you really must visit a place like these and your money is limited, hit an Oriental spa. For $100, you get bathed by a lovely woman, a passable rubdown, jacked off and a final bath.
posted by mischief at 10:15 PM on October 22, 2004
As for the second part, at an American spa, the girls do not want you to state explicitly what you want. Instead, you move her hand to the precise location you want massaged. Once there, you state your offer and if she agrees, she will nod.
At an Oriental spa, it's just the opposite. First, you pay for the room/massage. Then, your girl will bathe you. Then she will ask what you would like. Tell her explicitly. If she wants to do what you want to do, make your offer. She will counteroffer. Split the difference and you're in.
If it's your first time at that establishment, you may only get a handjob. On subsequent visits, tell your greeter you have been there before. They will remember you, and you will be able to get higher quality services.
Things will vary a bit from place to place but that's roughly what happens.
As for lingerie modelling, those are jack joints. You get a chair and a box of tissues. Your model will tease you and say things like "I'll show you my boobs for $10," "I'll take off my panties for $30," "I'll get closer to you for $40." You'll blow over $100 and the model will never touch you. Self-service only.
In my opinion, all adult entertainment places are too expensive for a simple orgasm. The biggest ripoffs are lingerie modelling and American-staff spas. If you really must visit a place like these and your money is limited, hit an Oriental spa. For $100, you get bathed by a lovely woman, a passable rubdown, jacked off and a final bath.
posted by mischief at 10:15 PM on October 22, 2004
This thread is closed to new comments.
I have no idea what people pay for this or how they ask for it, but I bet googling on those magic phrases will find you a tutorial on how to go about doing it.
posted by mathowie at 12:09 PM on October 22, 2004