Tampons for a later-in-life newbie

August 2, 2024 7:27 AM

I, a uterus-possessing person, have always used sanitary towels for my periods. Next week my period is due when I'll be on holiday, in a place where I'd really like to be in the swimming pool every day and so here I am, in my 40s, planning to use tampons for the very first time. Are they fairly straightforward to use? Is there anything useful or important I need to know beyond the instructions on the packet?
posted by damsel with a dulcimer to Health & Fitness (35 answers total)

Best answer: If it's uncomfortable, it's probably not pushed up far enough.
posted by ambulanceambiance at 7:30 AM on August 2 [47 favorites]

Best answer: I remember absolutely not performing the steps correctly the first time, but when I rechecked the instructions and did it correctly (insert _first_, then push the plunger) they worked fine, and I never really had trouble after that. The thing that takes some experimenting is figuring out how often you need to change them/what absorbency you need at what stage of your period, but the worst case there is you waste some tampons. (If it's hard to get out, it's probably not full.)
posted by restless_nomad at 7:38 AM on August 2 [4 favorites]

Best answer: I also always preferred pads but occasionally had to use tampons. (Note that I haven't had to use either since about 2020 when menopause finally kicked in.) The instructions are indeed pretty straightforward, but I'm going to add a couple extra bits of advice just in case:

* For safety's sake, make sure you wash your hands first. Surgical sterility isn't mandatory, but just don't, like, juggle raw chicken right before putting in the tampon without washing your hands first. A common-sense amount of cleanliness will be enough.

* Seconding ambulanceambieance. Most tampons have a plastic or carboard tube that's an applicator (insert it in your vagina, press the plunger to push the tampon into place, pull out applicator and discard), but every vagina is different, and sometimes the applicator may not be quite long enough for your body. Reaching inside and giving things a gentle push further in will do the trick. There is a brand called OB that doesn't have the applicator and is just the tampon; that gives you a little more control to make sure it gets in the right place. But if this is your first tampon outing I'd try with the applicator first and adjust if necessary.

* The packet will have a ton of warnings about something called Toxic Shock Syndrome; those may scare the daylights out of you. But that's much less of a concern than it used to be, and it would only be an issue if you left a tampon in for more than, like, a day. If you only put a tampon in when you're in the pool, and then pull it out and switch back to pads when you're done swimming for the day, you should be fine.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 7:38 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

Expect after swimming it will need to be changed anyway, I usually find the string sucks up water.

Use the smallest absorbency possible.

There are a million options but the key difference is applicator v non. Applicator is easier to get the tampon in place, as per ambulanceambiance's great point and restess_nomad's advice.

Tampax standard ones have cardboard applicators, most others are plastic.
posted by london explorer girl at 7:39 AM on August 2 [6 favorites]

You may prefer the ones with the applicators, if you don't like the idea of sticking your finger up there, or you worry about ending up with bloody hands in a public bathroom.
The applicator goes in the bin, not down the loo. It floats.
posted by quacks like a duck at 7:40 AM on August 2 [4 favorites]

They're straightforward! The plastic applicator ones are generally more comfortable/easier to insert but the paper/cardboard ones should be fine too. (In my tampon-wearing days, I used the applicator-free ones but I wouldn't recommend those here for you.)

There are variety packs that offer different ones for what stage you may be at in your period so that might be the way to go for you.
posted by edencosmic at 7:41 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

Best answer: My mom was a nurse and sex educator and she did a great job of introducing me to tampons before a pool party when I was a teen. She did the following:
1. Gave me a box of tampons with the plastic applicators as they go in more smoothly.
2. Gave me a bottle of personal lubricant to use if the going was challenging (maybe less applicable to a non-teenager?)
3. Told me to aim as if I was trying to hit my back opposite my belly button rather than straight up.
4. Told me to try it a bunch of times at home until I felt confident so there was no trouble shooting at the pool party itself.
Good luck! And enjoy your swim time!
posted by jeszac at 7:43 AM on August 2 [29 favorites]

Told me to aim as if I was trying to hit my back opposite my belly button rather than straight up.

This cannot be emphasized enough. If you try to go straight up, it’s going to be extremely uncomfortable.
posted by corey flood at 7:48 AM on August 2 [13 favorites]

It seems like the majority of Americans prefer applicators. I personally despise them, and when I’m using tampons I always get the OB ones with no applicator. It may be worth trying those if you don’t like the way the applicator ones feel.
posted by showbiz_liz at 8:01 AM on August 2 [11 favorites]

Only you can answer this for yourself but if you're familiar with your anatomy, you may prefer the no-applicator kind. No guessing, just in and go.

If your periods are irregular, you may want to consider a cup or disk instead. Tampons work best when you match the size to your flow. If you can't predict that, a cup gets around that by not have such a fixed volume. I mean, it's still like 30mL but you're less likely to have a blow out than if you're using a regular tampon and your body goes all super flow.
posted by fiercekitten at 8:23 AM on August 2 [3 favorites]

I am a perimenopausal woman and the last time I tried to use a tampon (also for swimming) things were so dry that I gave up and went without (late in the period, things were pretty light and it was fine). So maybe lube is a helpful piece of advice, above.

Also seconding the thing about clean hands. As my ob once told me, bacteria love blood.
posted by Lawn Beaver at 8:25 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

This is specific to Tampax - and my experience is from the UK, but I think it comes in the same varieties in the US:

As well as different types of applicator (plastic or cardboard, compact or not) and different absorbencies, it comes in two different shapes. "Pearl" ones open out kind of sideways in use; traditional ones are just cylindrical. You may find one works significantly better for you than the other (where "better" might mean less likely to leak, more comfortable in use, or more comfortable to remove).
posted by ManyLeggedCreature at 8:43 AM on August 2 [2 favorites]

I was going to also say that you may experience difficulties if things are a bit on the drier side, which happens at all ages, but particularly around perimenopause. Often it helps to remove a tampon and then, if you can, wait a little bit before you put in a new one, just to give things time to lubricate themselves a bit, or use lube. There are travel sized bottles of lube available.

Also, yeah, those tampons are going to suck up pool water and you'll have to change them every time you go to the bathroom during pool time, so make sure to take a larger supply than you think you'd need. I also strongly prefer OB because I find they expand so much better than the others and they're available with and without applicators, I believe.
posted by urbanlenny at 8:45 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

Plastic applicators are so much easier than paper. And if you haven't done it a lot, look for ones that have a bit of a rim on them to improve your grip on the applicator as in you insert.

I like Playtex Sport for swimming because of the grip and because the string isn't meant to be absorbent so they don't draw as much water into them.
posted by jacquilynne at 8:50 AM on August 2 [6 favorites]

Depending on your anatomy, using an applicator may still involve pushing a finger in at least a little bit.
posted by lokta at 8:54 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

Like some of the others in this thread, I also hate using a tampon applicator. Before committing to an entire box of any style, I'd borrow a tampon from somebody to try it out-- before your trip so you don't have to figure it out during.

Also YMMV, but I've honestly found that light days don't need either a tampon or a pad for the pool. The water pressure can be enough to stop the flow.
posted by Pitachu at 8:56 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

I'll also note that you expand the OB tampons-- the applicatorless ones-- around your finger tip, so it's not nearly as gross as it might seem.
posted by Pitachu at 9:01 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

Nobody has mentioned this so I'll say it: Tampons are not an impermeable cork! If you have a heavy flow, the tampon will absorb blood but not all the blood. Some of the blood will find its way out of you. I always use a backup pad with a tampon, I never trust a tampon completely. Except when swimming. I find that something about being immersed in water prevents my blood from flowing out. But when I get out of the water, it's ready to burst out.

Other learnings: When you have a heavy flow, and are sitting on the toilet putting the applicator in, be very careful of all the ways that blood can go flinging everywhere (onto clothes and floor) because the damn applicator is filled with blood. It helps to go slowly and have a lot of toilet paper handy. It's wild how much toilet paper may be necessary to wrap up everything safely to put in the trash. Oh yeah, make sure the trash is nearby. Don't flush any of that stuff down the toilet.
posted by oxisos at 9:06 AM on August 2 [5 favorites]

If they're uncomfortable to insert at all, either with or without applicator, you can use water-based lube. Something I desperately wish I'd known when I was a teenager and tampons were still relevant to me.
posted by terretu at 9:10 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

I strongly recommend against trying a cup for the first time while on vacation. They're great, but they're even more individual and have more of a learning curve than tampon. You have to get the right size, then learn how to insert them in your own individual body so that they seal, and then learn how long you can go before emptying them. Emptying them can also be messy and troublesome if you're away from your own private bathroom. If you think it's something you might want to try in the future, I think you should try them first when you're going to to be home all day.

As for tampons, beware of capillary action. When they get fully saturated, blood can start to carry down the string. And if you're in a pool or a bath, water can carry up the string, causing them to saturate more quickly. Don't wear a lightly colored bathing suit.
posted by Kutsuwamushi at 9:18 AM on August 2 [13 favorites]

I've honestly found that light days don't need either a tampon or a pad for the pool. The water pressure can be enough to stop the flow. ...

I get out of the water, it's ready to burst out

Yeah, I would not trust going without a tampon in those circumstances, personally. Signed, my tween self, who found that out the hard way in the shower at camp.
posted by limeonaire at 9:37 AM on August 2 [3 favorites]

I wouldn't be afraid of tampons with no applicator, despite all the people suggesting you not start with those. When I first tried tampons as a teenager I used applicator-free OB because Consumer Reports recommended them and learning to use them was no big deal and not hard. I did need to try a few times before I figured out just how far I needed to push the tampon in (as far as I could) but there's nothing particularly difficult about using your finger to do it. When I eventually tried tampons with applicators, I always found them more difficult to use! The applicator adds a whole extra layer of complication.

If there's no applicator there's less waste and the tampons take up less space in your purse. You can even easily stick one or two in your front jeans pocket. Unless you're super grossed out by the idea of putting your finger in your vagina, I recommend starting with no-applicator tampons.
posted by Redstart at 9:42 AM on August 2 [4 favorites]

Applicators function like little plungers. There is a tube you hold onto, the tampon is inside that. Then there is bit that fits inside the tube, that you use to push the tampon out of the tube.

I find that the cardboard applicators are next to useless when my fingers are damp because it becomes virtually impossible to hold on to the tube. The brands I have in mind have little ridges pressed into the cardboard to avoid that but they do nothing for me. Chances are at a pool, wrangling wet swimwear, your fingers will be a bit damp. So pick something that is easy to hold on to if you pick applicator tampons. I like Tampax pearl for that.

Nthing a small bottle of lube. Menstrual blood is quite mucousy and helps tampons slide in and out. But if you are at a pool changing frequently there is a good chance the tampon will absorb more water than blood and/or won’t be full when you change so you won’t have the slip required to make this easy and comfortable.
posted by koahiatamadl at 10:11 AM on August 2

Have you considered wearing a bikini/two piece where the bottom are little shorts? They make me feel soooo much more comfortable. Especially in these situations.

I'd love for you to use the cup but agree it's not right for the first time. As others have said, aim back, not up. if you hit resistance before it's really in there, you're going to far up. And practice beforehand! Try applicators and try no applicators! Get in there and try it! Remember, if a 12 year old girl (ok, me) can do it, you can too!!!
posted by violetish at 10:29 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

When I first used tampons, when I would try to push one up, I just felt this blockage. Like I could barely push it/couldn't really push it at all. But when it's at the right angle, it just slides right in (nthing try lube if you need). Also: if you're wearing a tampon and end up having a very light flow or a too-absorbent tampon, you can have a lot of somewhat uncomfy friction removing it. Everything feels so dry.
posted by bookworm4125 at 10:32 AM on August 2 [4 favorites]

PSA that I wish I'd had as a new tampon user: if you follow the instructions and it's not super straightforward and easy, you may have a tilted/retroflex uterus. In that case, try carefully tilting in different directions - toward your belly button, even a little sideways. You'll know when you've got it right.
posted by toastedcheese at 10:41 AM on August 2 [2 favorites]

I'd say to get some smaller tampons with plastic applicators and go ahead and try them at home before you leave. Or maybe get a few from a friend before you invest in a whole box. You don't have to have your period to try them. You might use lube particularly in this case. Sometimes it's easier to insert them if you squat or sit on the toilet. If it feels uncomfortable, you maybe haven't put it in far enough. It's okay to take it out and try again with a new one. Plan to use up a few in trying them out. I will also say: if you aren't super comfortable in this area, it might be more difficult at first. But, they should be mostly forgettable once in.

And yes, plan to put a new tampon in right after swimming. They will absorb swimming water and your period will stop when you are in the water, so you'll want a fresh one when you are out of the water. If you think you might be in and out of the water a lot, just bring several with you. You will start to figure out how the flow will work for you.
posted by bluedaisy at 10:53 AM on August 2 [1 favorite]

Ah, right, yes. Applicator failure modes: 1. A cardboard applicator absolutely refuses to move, and you can't get a good enough purchase on it to make it change its mind. 2. A compact plastic applicator decides to telescope back into itself around the tampon instead of pushing it out. In my experience, neither one happens very often, but if you make sure you always have a spare to hand, you can consign the recalcitrant one to the bin and start over with a new one, rather than fighting with it.
posted by ManyLeggedCreature at 11:29 AM on August 2

I will second that when I needed them, I strongly preferred OB, and suggest you might want to try both when you're at home in case it makes a big difference for you. I found them easier to get into a comfortable place.
posted by lookoutbelow at 12:41 PM on August 2

PSA that I wish I'd had as a new tampon user: if you follow the instructions and it's not super straightforward and easy, you may have a tilted/retroflex uterus.

Oh yeah, seconding this! A "tilted" uterus just means: usually your uterus sort of leans forward , but for some of us it leans backward. This is actually one reason I preferred pads; I have a tilted uterus and it always took some monkeying around to find the right angle and I got fed up. But I'm a bit of an unusual case (mine isn't just tilted back, it's tilted back and to the left - I'm like Kevin Costner in JFK up in there).
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 2:06 PM on August 2 [1 favorite]

I used tampons exclusively for probably 40 years (until I didn't need them anymore). I especially endorse two pieces of advice previously listed: 1. Aim the tampon toward the small of your back. 2. I always wore a mini-pad in addition to my tampon, except when swimming.
Another thing I always did was, after application, sort of wad up the string and tuck it into my, for lack of better word, "opening" to kind of get it out of the way. It just felt more comfortable for me that way. I much preferred a tampon with an applicator and always used a cardboard one with no problems, but maybe cardboard tampons are not as sturdy as they used to be??
I did a women-only triathlon one year, and in the pre-race packet they gave us a free sample of menstrual cups, so I used one during the triathlon even though I had previously not used one for anything, ever. It worked great, but even now I'm amazed at the risk I took doing that! :)
posted by SageTrail at 2:38 PM on August 2 [1 favorite]

My first tampon was many years ago, but: lube helps, and I remember putting a foot up on the bath tub while inserting and that helped a lot. Figuring out which way to stand (experiment!) helped with whatever way my uterus goes.

If you're experienced with inserting things in your vagina (I wasn't then!) it should go pretty smoothly.
posted by freethefeet at 4:46 PM on August 2

Adding only because I didn't know any better when I first used tampons over 50 years ago. The applicator, if you use one, is in two pieces, one piece is wrapped around the tampon itself, and a smaller piece that collapses inside the outer piece that actually pushes the tampon reasonably high up in your vagina, where you won't be able to feel it. My first time using the applicators I wondered why I could absolutely feel the tampon, and it's because one piece of the applicator stayed inside me and I didn't know any better to remove it. You are almost certainly smarter than I was as a young teen with no one to ask, and I hope the instructions now are more straightforward and less coy than they were then.
posted by angiep at 5:25 PM on August 2 [3 favorites]

Slim tampons made for teens with plastic round-tipped applicators are the most comfortable to insert. They're not good for the environment, but you did your part by avoiding them for almost 30 years, it's ok to buy a box now just to try them out!

Play with a tampon before inserting it - like, waste one by pushing it out of the applicator to see how the applicator works.

Push it up further than you think by about 2 inches. If it feels uncomfortable it means it's not far enough - the whole thing needs to be right up in there, almost as deep as your middle finger will go.

Note that the angle to insert it is not vertical - rather, it's sort of "back and up", towards your back waistline at about a 45' angle.

Tampons are very uncomfortable to remove when dry, because the cotton kind of sticks to your mucous membranes. So if you decide to practice inserting one (a good idea!), leave it in for long enough to get some surface moisture before you try to remove it. At least an hour or two? Or have a bath before removing it!

When changing a tampon, I suggest this order of operations:
1. Remove the old one
2. Insert the new one
3. Hold the string out of the way to keep it out of your pee stream, THEN pee and wipe.
Reason: You want a little bit of blood at the opening to help lubricate the new one as it enters. If you pee and wipe first, the opening to your body will be a bit dry and thus the tampon will be a bit more uncomfortable to insert.

Don't flush them in older or tempermental toilets, they can cause a clog. Wrap them in toilet paper and throw in the trash. (If you must flush them in a public heavy duty toilet, it's not ideal but it should be ok)

Practice helps a lot.

A thin pantyliner and a dark swimsuit are both very good insurance policies.

Good luck!
posted by nouvelle-personne at 9:38 PM on August 2 [2 favorites]

Response by poster: Thank you for all your very helpful answers! Am presently on holiday, using tampons successfully and swimming.
posted by damsel with a dulcimer at 12:06 PM on August 8 [3 favorites]