There was no need to let it last this long and get this bad.
August 29, 2023 11:28 AM Subscribe
I messed up. Badly. I was supposed fly from Vancouver to Toronto in about an hour, but haven't even packed yet. Reschedule, right? Unfortunately the depth of my ineptitude makes that more complicated.
A year ago I lost my job after severe depression and anxiety made it impossible to work. Since then, I have been living off savings, then credit, then finally borrowed money while trying to get a new job. The apartment was a mess and I couldn't even bring myself to go outside. At that point I had to accept that things were far more dire than I was willing to admit.
So the new plan was this: I'd clear out the apartment, clean it up and move back in with my parents in Toronto and work on my mental health. Or at least, this was plan at the end of June but I've been putting it off over and over again at the last minute, incurring penalties and costs I could scarcely afford.
Over that time I did manage to clear out my hoarded crap and make my place livable and start venturing outside again, so I was confident I could bring myself to pack my things and move out today (also because I literally had no other choice), but the procrastination monster got me once again.
The ticket I booked does not allow changes, so I had to cancel it. I have to leave this apartment in the next two days before I get charged rent (that I absolutely cannot afford) but every flight for this month is too expensive now. My parents don't have any more money to lend me and I have no other options.
I am in a state of panic.
What do I do now?
A year ago I lost my job after severe depression and anxiety made it impossible to work. Since then, I have been living off savings, then credit, then finally borrowed money while trying to get a new job. The apartment was a mess and I couldn't even bring myself to go outside. At that point I had to accept that things were far more dire than I was willing to admit.
So the new plan was this: I'd clear out the apartment, clean it up and move back in with my parents in Toronto and work on my mental health. Or at least, this was plan at the end of June but I've been putting it off over and over again at the last minute, incurring penalties and costs I could scarcely afford.
Over that time I did manage to clear out my hoarded crap and make my place livable and start venturing outside again, so I was confident I could bring myself to pack my things and move out today (also because I literally had no other choice), but the procrastination monster got me once again.
The ticket I booked does not allow changes, so I had to cancel it. I have to leave this apartment in the next two days before I get charged rent (that I absolutely cannot afford) but every flight for this month is too expensive now. My parents don't have any more money to lend me and I have no other options.
I am in a state of panic.
What do I do now?
Can you travel by bus part of the way?
posted by kapers at 11:42 AM on August 29, 2023 [10 favorites]
posted by kapers at 11:42 AM on August 29, 2023 [10 favorites]
Can you do a "book now, pay later" flight so that you can spread the cost across several months?
posted by luzdeluna at 11:46 AM on August 29, 2023 [7 favorites]
posted by luzdeluna at 11:46 AM on August 29, 2023 [7 favorites]
Best answer: First of all, you have done a great job pulling things together from a low and making a plan while dealing with serious mental health issues! Don't downplay that in your mind! This is just another hitch to work through.
I assume you got some value back for your cancelled ticket, right? Figure out the first date that that value (plus whatever other resources you have) will get you to Toronto. Okay, that's how long you need to cover.
Is the apartment cleaned out except for the stuff you're taking with you? If not, now is the time to call every friend you have to just get the stuff out of there. People are more willing to help than the voice of depression will tell you, especially if it's clear it's just a defined task. Just focus on getting that done for now. Everything must go! Imagine how light and free you will feel when everything is gone.
Then, make a plan for however many days you have to cover between the end of the lease and your new ticket. It's probably not too many if you are willing to take the least convenient possible flight connecting through, like, Nunavut and Tokyo; Toronto-Vancouver is a major route, after all. Your goal is to hand over the keys at the end of the lease and go anywhere it's possible to go. Ideally, stay with friends to save funds. If you can't do that, the cheapest safe hotel or even hostel you can find. Remember, you're only staying there for a few days. It can be dingy as long as no one's stealing your luggage. This is your choice as long as the total hotel charges won't exceed another month's rent (if not, you're paying that rent when you can, and you'll deal with that later; it'll take them some time to come after you for it).
Luckily, once you're out the door, you'll have nowhere else to go, so you'll pretty much have to get on that plane to Vancouver!
You can do this. You know your brain lies to you to make everything impossible. It's lying now. You've already come so far! Good luck!
posted by praemunire at 11:46 AM on August 29, 2023 [8 favorites]
I assume you got some value back for your cancelled ticket, right? Figure out the first date that that value (plus whatever other resources you have) will get you to Toronto. Okay, that's how long you need to cover.
Is the apartment cleaned out except for the stuff you're taking with you? If not, now is the time to call every friend you have to just get the stuff out of there. People are more willing to help than the voice of depression will tell you, especially if it's clear it's just a defined task. Just focus on getting that done for now. Everything must go! Imagine how light and free you will feel when everything is gone.
Then, make a plan for however many days you have to cover between the end of the lease and your new ticket. It's probably not too many if you are willing to take the least convenient possible flight connecting through, like, Nunavut and Tokyo; Toronto-Vancouver is a major route, after all. Your goal is to hand over the keys at the end of the lease and go anywhere it's possible to go. Ideally, stay with friends to save funds. If you can't do that, the cheapest safe hotel or even hostel you can find. Remember, you're only staying there for a few days. It can be dingy as long as no one's stealing your luggage. This is your choice as long as the total hotel charges won't exceed another month's rent (if not, you're paying that rent when you can, and you'll deal with that later; it'll take them some time to come after you for it).
Luckily, once you're out the door, you'll have nowhere else to go, so you'll pretty much have to get on that plane to Vancouver!
You can do this. You know your brain lies to you to make everything impossible. It's lying now. You've already come so far! Good luck!
posted by praemunire at 11:46 AM on August 29, 2023 [8 favorites]
The cheapest flights from Vancouver to Toronto in the next couple of days are $313 (per Google flights). I don't think a flight to a different location and/or several days in a hotel/hostel, plus a cheap Toronto flight will be less than that. If you can find somewhere to stay through the weekend or beg a couple of extra days on your lease, flights go down to $177 on Sunday and down to $90 next Wednesday.
Do you have any furniture or other items you could sell or Facebook Marketplace or similar to help raise funds for a ticket? Bonus would be less stuff to get out of the apartment.
posted by rabbitbookworm at 11:59 AM on August 29, 2023 [5 favorites]
Do you have any furniture or other items you could sell or Facebook Marketplace or similar to help raise funds for a ticket? Bonus would be less stuff to get out of the apartment.
posted by rabbitbookworm at 11:59 AM on August 29, 2023 [5 favorites]
Or if you don't have local friends, maybe Couchsurfing for a few days is an option?
posted by rabbitbookworm at 12:05 PM on August 29, 2023
posted by rabbitbookworm at 12:05 PM on August 29, 2023
To expand on the above: the cheapest flight I'm seeing right off the bat for you to get to Toronto with one checked and one carryon bag is $457 CAD; there are much cheaper options if you don't need to check a bag. So I'm assuming you're looking for an amount below that.
Here is the absolute cheapest non-flight route that I've seen, which would require you to book it out of your apartment ASAP:
You can get from Vancouver to Seattle on FlixBus for $61.02 CAD (it leaves at 1 PM today, so you'd have to move fast). You'll need to find a place to stay overnight, such as a hostel. You can then get from Seattle WA to Chicago IL for $141 CAD on Amtrak on the Empire Builder (that's before tax, I can't find the with tax fees, but it's with bags included). You would get there on September 1 at 5 PM. Can your parents pick you up from Chicago? Alternately, there's a Greyhound bus route that you can pick up there for $79.21 CAD (leaves at an awful 2 AM and has two transfers, but gets you into Toronto by 7:45 PM the next day). That's a total of 281.23 CAD, plus probably another $75 or so for hostel in Seattle. This does not account for food costs.
The benefit of doing it like this is you can purchase each ticket as you go along, meaning if you have a PayPal or Venmo or etc where you can get donations, when that money comes in, you can buy the next leg.
That said, I think your best option is what rabbitbookworm suggests. Can you call your landlord right now and let them know you may need a 2 day extension and ask them to waive the costs? Can you ask them to keep the security deposit in lieu of rent?
posted by peppercorn at 12:07 PM on August 29, 2023 [3 favorites]
Here is the absolute cheapest non-flight route that I've seen, which would require you to book it out of your apartment ASAP:
You can get from Vancouver to Seattle on FlixBus for $61.02 CAD (it leaves at 1 PM today, so you'd have to move fast). You'll need to find a place to stay overnight, such as a hostel. You can then get from Seattle WA to Chicago IL for $141 CAD on Amtrak on the Empire Builder (that's before tax, I can't find the with tax fees, but it's with bags included). You would get there on September 1 at 5 PM. Can your parents pick you up from Chicago? Alternately, there's a Greyhound bus route that you can pick up there for $79.21 CAD (leaves at an awful 2 AM and has two transfers, but gets you into Toronto by 7:45 PM the next day). That's a total of 281.23 CAD, plus probably another $75 or so for hostel in Seattle. This does not account for food costs.
The benefit of doing it like this is you can purchase each ticket as you go along, meaning if you have a PayPal or Venmo or etc where you can get donations, when that money comes in, you can buy the next leg.
That said, I think your best option is what rabbitbookworm suggests. Can you call your landlord right now and let them know you may need a 2 day extension and ask them to waive the costs? Can you ask them to keep the security deposit in lieu of rent?
posted by peppercorn at 12:07 PM on August 29, 2023 [3 favorites]
Don’t pay your rent. Call the bank and have them stop automatic payments, cancel your cheques, or open a new bank account and empty your old one. It will take your landlord months to evict you. This will give you at least a month to pack and find an affordable flight. Hang in there
posted by shock muppet at 12:19 PM on August 29, 2023 [31 favorites]
posted by shock muppet at 12:19 PM on August 29, 2023 [31 favorites]
Best answer: I agree with shock muppet. When I was in a bad place years ago I started to divide bills in into things that will get me an angry call versus things that I absolutely needed to pay. Generally your phone bill you’ll need to pay but you can go without most utilities and rent before serious repercussions. This is easier said than done. If you can find friends or family to help you pack, even if they have to to fly to pick you up. Don’t be afraid to ask, we’ve all had times like this and getting someone there to help you can really do wonders.
posted by geoff. at 12:36 PM on August 29, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by geoff. at 12:36 PM on August 29, 2023 [2 favorites]
If you're short on friends, post on your local buy nothing group, explain your situation and ask for help packing up. People on those things are saints and someone will undoubtedly help you out with packing.
You have until 1pm on September 1st to be out of the apartment you're in per the standard rules, but you could also ask for additional time from your landlord. Most people - even building managers for big management corporations - are kind people and they would probably help you out there too, unless you have a bad relationship with them.
For getting out of there, Flair flights are pretty much always cheap - they're expensive this close to your flight date, but in the meantime, if you can't negotiate more time with your apartment manager, look into staying in one of Vancouver's hostels or seeing if you can couchsurf, even through someone on the Buy Nothing group.
Good luck. You can do this. It's just one last push to the finish line and you can start over fresh.
posted by urbanlenny at 12:36 PM on August 29, 2023 [7 favorites]
You have until 1pm on September 1st to be out of the apartment you're in per the standard rules, but you could also ask for additional time from your landlord. Most people - even building managers for big management corporations - are kind people and they would probably help you out there too, unless you have a bad relationship with them.
For getting out of there, Flair flights are pretty much always cheap - they're expensive this close to your flight date, but in the meantime, if you can't negotiate more time with your apartment manager, look into staying in one of Vancouver's hostels or seeing if you can couchsurf, even through someone on the Buy Nothing group.
Good luck. You can do this. It's just one last push to the finish line and you can start over fresh.
posted by urbanlenny at 12:36 PM on August 29, 2023 [7 favorites]
The fastest way out is through.
Email/text your landlord. “my plans have fallen through. I apologize but I cannot vacate the apartment on X day. My new expected departure is no later than the end of the month, hopefully sooner. I cannot pay next month’s rent yet. For now please consider my deposit toward next month’s rent. I am doing my best to correct the situation. If I had another option, I would take it. Regardless I will be vacating no later than the end of this month, before X date.”
posted by samthemander at 1:17 PM on August 29, 2023 [14 favorites]
Email/text your landlord. “my plans have fallen through. I apologize but I cannot vacate the apartment on X day. My new expected departure is no later than the end of the month, hopefully sooner. I cannot pay next month’s rent yet. For now please consider my deposit toward next month’s rent. I am doing my best to correct the situation. If I had another option, I would take it. Regardless I will be vacating no later than the end of this month, before X date.”
posted by samthemander at 1:17 PM on August 29, 2023 [14 favorites]
Agreed with shock muppet. They can "charge" you whatever, you do not have any way to pay it and they will have to legally remove you from the premises which will take time unless you are already under an eviction order.
I know that you are in a fragile place and the idea of accumulating additional confrontation and shame by doing so will be pretty unthinkable, but at this point does this really make anything substantially worse?
Depending on any previous confrontations with the landlord, you may be able to get some grace with slightly creative-for-shortcut-purposes half-truths: "So hey, I have a bad situation. My parents were coming to move me home this weekend because I am not well, but they have an emergency that means they can't get here until the following weekend. I don't have any way to do this without them and I can't get out until they come."
They're going to probably say something like fine but you'll have to pay rent for September, then. Probably they will also say they can't pro-rate it unless someone moves in before the end of September. (this is at least true in the US in a lot of places - not that they must, but that they can so they do). And you say yeah, I understand.
And then don't. You're going to get asked where rent is, and then told you're racking up late fees or whatever, and then the messages will get increasingly stern. If you can't avoid them, just cough a bunch and say you're waiting on your parents, they're going to venmo or whatever any minute now. Eventually they're going to be like look, get out or we'll evict you, and hopefully you've already gotten yourself home by then. Maybe that month of rent goes to collections, maybe they're just glad this wasn't a 3-month fight and blacklist you from renting with them again.
Capitalism is what sucks here. You do not suck. Shit happens. Put your own oxygen mask on first here, do what you gotta do to survive, and one day in the future you can make it right with the universe by helping someone in a similar situation. Get home, get some meds, work on retaining more serotonin, rest your stressed body and mind, and start your healing process. It'll be okay.
posted by Lyn Never at 1:21 PM on August 29, 2023 [4 favorites]
I know that you are in a fragile place and the idea of accumulating additional confrontation and shame by doing so will be pretty unthinkable, but at this point does this really make anything substantially worse?
Depending on any previous confrontations with the landlord, you may be able to get some grace with slightly creative-for-shortcut-purposes half-truths: "So hey, I have a bad situation. My parents were coming to move me home this weekend because I am not well, but they have an emergency that means they can't get here until the following weekend. I don't have any way to do this without them and I can't get out until they come."
They're going to probably say something like fine but you'll have to pay rent for September, then. Probably they will also say they can't pro-rate it unless someone moves in before the end of September. (this is at least true in the US in a lot of places - not that they must, but that they can so they do). And you say yeah, I understand.
And then don't. You're going to get asked where rent is, and then told you're racking up late fees or whatever, and then the messages will get increasingly stern. If you can't avoid them, just cough a bunch and say you're waiting on your parents, they're going to venmo or whatever any minute now. Eventually they're going to be like look, get out or we'll evict you, and hopefully you've already gotten yourself home by then. Maybe that month of rent goes to collections, maybe they're just glad this wasn't a 3-month fight and blacklist you from renting with them again.
Capitalism is what sucks here. You do not suck. Shit happens. Put your own oxygen mask on first here, do what you gotta do to survive, and one day in the future you can make it right with the universe by helping someone in a similar situation. Get home, get some meds, work on retaining more serotonin, rest your stressed body and mind, and start your healing process. It'll be okay.
posted by Lyn Never at 1:21 PM on August 29, 2023 [4 favorites]
Best answer: I 100% understand, I was in a very similar situation. Your brain is screaming at you to stay put and do nothing, like a rabbit in a trap. But your brain is wrong, you can get out. I severely procrastinated on a cross country move and ended up packing up about 1/4 of my apartment in one day into a rented uhaul then drove home. 1-800-got-junk came by and took the rest.
The other half of your brain is panicking that you've messed up forever. That's also not true. You don't need to empty out/pack up your apartment if you can't. Toronto has laws that will dictate how your landlord deals with anything you leave behind. It's also true that your landlord cannot evict you in just a few days or even a month. Priority #1: a plan to get home even if that means a single carryon. Don't worry about anything else, your landlord, utilities, your stuff, they will work themselves out.
posted by muddgirl at 1:56 PM on August 29, 2023 [7 favorites]
The other half of your brain is panicking that you've messed up forever. That's also not true. You don't need to empty out/pack up your apartment if you can't. Toronto has laws that will dictate how your landlord deals with anything you leave behind. It's also true that your landlord cannot evict you in just a few days or even a month. Priority #1: a plan to get home even if that means a single carryon. Don't worry about anything else, your landlord, utilities, your stuff, they will work themselves out.
posted by muddgirl at 1:56 PM on August 29, 2023 [7 favorites]
Best answer: I'll be honest, the reason I think you should not take additional time in the apartment unless you absolutely have to is to avoid any possibility of this situation recurring at the end of next month. Don't let depression-brain pilfer any more opportunities. Also, it doesn't sound like you or your folks have cash coming in at the moment, and even if, as we've already talked about, you can put off paying your rent for that last month in various ways (with any luck, you'll find a job in Toronto soon and can pay it off then!), you still need to eat and such for however much longer you're in Vancouver. Just take advantage of this crisis moment and get yourself home in one piece as soon as possible. If you're walking out with a carry-on and nothing else, that's fine. Stuff is just stuff, you are what matters. Belongings are replaceable and your life is fixable.
posted by praemunire at 2:21 PM on August 29, 2023 [19 favorites]
posted by praemunire at 2:21 PM on August 29, 2023 [19 favorites]
Oh wow, you have done so so much. Of course your executive function is _tired_. Take a breath, then do the next thing. I'm proud of you.
posted by amtho at 3:11 PM on August 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by amtho at 3:11 PM on August 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
My city has a fund to pay people who are unhoused here and have somewhere to live somewhere else to get there. Churches also frequently have a fund to buy gas for folks stuck in town. I haven't hit the right search term for Vancouver, but if asking strangers who want to help sounds like an option, I'd look for churches with active social services programs, they're likely to know your options and possibly have a fund to help you out.
posted by momus_window at 3:19 PM on August 29, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by momus_window at 3:19 PM on August 29, 2023 [2 favorites]
If you do figure out a way to get to Toronto ASAP and have to leave your stuff behind for the time being, please know that your landlord must exercise duty of care by carefully removing the personal property and ensuring that nothing is damaged, lost, or stolen; AND store the personal property in a safe place for at least 60 days. If you suspect your landlord is the sort to ignore little details like their legal obligations in a business arrangement, the RTB (Residential Tenancy Branch) will handle dispute resolution - you won't need to find and hire a lawyer or anything like that to get your stuff back.
Ultimately I agree with the above posters that stuff is just stuff, but I hope this information lets you breathe a bit easier about that aspect of things. You have time.
posted by btfreek at 5:44 PM on August 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
Ultimately I agree with the above posters that stuff is just stuff, but I hope this information lets you breathe a bit easier about that aspect of things. You have time.
posted by btfreek at 5:44 PM on August 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: What is the absolute most you can afford to spend on getting to Toronto?
>> I have $200 to my name
How many bags do you need to check? Do you have pets you're traveling with?
>> 2 Checked bags, no pets
Do you know anyone else, anywhere else in the world, that you can stay with for even a few days while you put up an emergency GoFundMe or request for Venmo/Paypal donations?
> No one I can reach without spending more money.
Bus
> Since Greyhound pulled out of Canada, my options are limited. The idea of entering a foreign country with the intention of hitchhiking across it in my present frame of mind is a funny enough that I'd seriously consider it, but I'm doubtful I can summon the emotional fortitude to withstand even the tiniest bit of scrutiny from a border guard.
Can you do a "book now, pay later" flight so that you can spread the cost across several months?
> If they don't check my non-existent credit score, maybe.
I'll be honest, the reason I think you should not take additional time in the apartment unless you absolutely have to is to avoid any possibility of this situation recurring at the end of next month. [...] Just take advantage of this crisis moment and get yourself home in one piece as soon as possible.
> This is exactly what I'm thinking. I don't want to stay here any longer or enter an even more precarious situation.
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 6:26 PM on August 29, 2023
>> I have $200 to my name
How many bags do you need to check? Do you have pets you're traveling with?
>> 2 Checked bags, no pets
Do you know anyone else, anywhere else in the world, that you can stay with for even a few days while you put up an emergency GoFundMe or request for Venmo/Paypal donations?
> No one I can reach without spending more money.
Bus
> Since Greyhound pulled out of Canada, my options are limited. The idea of entering a foreign country with the intention of hitchhiking across it in my present frame of mind is a funny enough that I'd seriously consider it, but I'm doubtful I can summon the emotional fortitude to withstand even the tiniest bit of scrutiny from a border guard.
Can you do a "book now, pay later" flight so that you can spread the cost across several months?
> If they don't check my non-existent credit score, maybe.
I'll be honest, the reason I think you should not take additional time in the apartment unless you absolutely have to is to avoid any possibility of this situation recurring at the end of next month. [...] Just take advantage of this crisis moment and get yourself home in one piece as soon as possible.
> This is exactly what I'm thinking. I don't want to stay here any longer or enter an even more precarious situation.
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 6:26 PM on August 29, 2023
What is the absolute most you can afford to spend on getting to Toronto?
>> I have $200 to my name
Have you checked to see if your ticket has future travel value? E.g., most (but sadly not all) Air Canada fares will give you a credit for the value of a canceled ticket. That would make things easier for you, obviously.
posted by praemunire at 7:04 PM on August 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
>> I have $200 to my name
Have you checked to see if your ticket has future travel value? E.g., most (but sadly not all) Air Canada fares will give you a credit for the value of a canceled ticket. That would make things easier for you, obviously.
posted by praemunire at 7:04 PM on August 29, 2023 [1 favorite]
Also, BNPL companies are loathsome, but this is an emergency, so...Uplift does work with Air Canada. I don't think it would cost you anything to see if they'll extend credit for the ticket.
posted by praemunire at 7:07 PM on August 29, 2023 [4 favorites]
posted by praemunire at 7:07 PM on August 29, 2023 [4 favorites]
When you say there’s nobody you can stay with that won’t cost too much to reach, how far away are they? I know folks in town with vehicles and time if you need to get to a friend’s so you can chill till the flights go down (looks like sub-$200 in the next few days). I’m also certain a no-interest loan for a hundred or two is doable…feel free to DM.
posted by HoteDoge at 9:58 PM on August 29, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by HoteDoge at 9:58 PM on August 29, 2023 [2 favorites]
What state is your apartment in right now?
Is immediate short term work something you can take on either here or in Toronto? Maybe there's a neighborhood FB/Whatsapp/whatever group where you can explain you're in a short-term jam and offer household/handyman help for the day or something along those lines.
Do you have enough credit to book a flight, or is your credit all used up?
posted by trig at 3:59 AM on August 30, 2023
Is immediate short term work something you can take on either here or in Toronto? Maybe there's a neighborhood FB/Whatsapp/whatever group where you can explain you're in a short-term jam and offer household/handyman help for the day or something along those lines.
Do you have enough credit to book a flight, or is your credit all used up?
posted by trig at 3:59 AM on August 30, 2023
Best answer: Also...
I wish I could send some dollars your way to make this easier. Since I can't I just wanted to say: don't beat yourself up about this. I've also done things like have to cancel a flight because I wasn't packed and lost lots of money I couldn't afford to. (I got serious deja vu reading your post.) But it's not true that there wasn't any need to get to that point. Maybe need is the wrong word, but there was a reason, and if there were some button to press to get a do-over the anxiety and depression would probably still lead to the same result. It's a health failure, not a moral one.
Wishing you well.
posted by trig at 4:12 AM on August 30, 2023 [5 favorites]
I wish I could send some dollars your way to make this easier. Since I can't I just wanted to say: don't beat yourself up about this. I've also done things like have to cancel a flight because I wasn't packed and lost lots of money I couldn't afford to. (I got serious deja vu reading your post.) But it's not true that there wasn't any need to get to that point. Maybe need is the wrong word, but there was a reason, and if there were some button to press to get a do-over the anxiety and depression would probably still lead to the same result. It's a health failure, not a moral one.
Wishing you well.
posted by trig at 4:12 AM on August 30, 2023 [5 favorites]
If you can afford a ticket in the next couple weeks just book it and don't pay your rent. In BC it takes two months minimum to evict someone and because you have no assets essentially the only thing they can do is ding your credit report.
If your landlord is the reasonable sort then promising to vacate by September FOO instead of making them evict you on October 31 is a win for them as they'll be able to collect rent for October. The landlord will likely try to retain your damage deposit to cover some of the owed rent but, legally they aren't even allowed to do that (lots of landlords operate illegally though). If your place isn't trashed be sure to take plenty of photos before you leave to document condition.
posted by Mitheral at 4:31 AM on August 30, 2023
If your landlord is the reasonable sort then promising to vacate by September FOO instead of making them evict you on October 31 is a win for them as they'll be able to collect rent for October. The landlord will likely try to retain your damage deposit to cover some of the owed rent but, legally they aren't even allowed to do that (lots of landlords operate illegally though). If your place isn't trashed be sure to take plenty of photos before you leave to document condition.
posted by Mitheral at 4:31 AM on August 30, 2023
Pack.
When you have packed, book the earliest ticket that you can afford. Either a flight or the bus-train-bus combination suggested above.
Sit tight until then.
Do not unpack.
Get out of the apartment early to reach your transport.
Sort anything else out from Toronto.
If at all possible, call anyone you know in Vancouver and ask them to help you actually get out of town and onto the transport you have booked.
posted by plonkee at 4:58 AM on August 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
When you have packed, book the earliest ticket that you can afford. Either a flight or the bus-train-bus combination suggested above.
Sit tight until then.
Do not unpack.
Get out of the apartment early to reach your transport.
Sort anything else out from Toronto.
If at all possible, call anyone you know in Vancouver and ask them to help you actually get out of town and onto the transport you have booked.
posted by plonkee at 4:58 AM on August 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
Google flights has a 1-way to Toronto on Friday Sept 1 for $269 currently - WestJet to Kelowna, then Flair to Toronto. Can you get a payday loan to cover the bit you don't have? Pack your bags (grabbing only the things you need) leave the apartment as it is, and be in the airport first thing Friday morning.
Edit: price dropped to $269 while I was looking...
posted by cgg at 8:36 AM on August 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
Edit: price dropped to $269 while I was looking...
posted by cgg at 8:36 AM on August 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
Key to this is don't pay the rent or any bills. You will not get evicted or have services cut off overnight, and by the time it's a real problem for anyone you should be safely in Toronto.
posted by plonkee at 8:41 AM on August 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by plonkee at 8:41 AM on August 30, 2023 [1 favorite]
I wonder if the procrastination might be due to your resistance to discarding your possessions. You mentioned you can only take two checked bags. Does that mean you need to get rid of all your furniture, kitchen items, books, most clothes, etc? That is tough for most people, regardless of mental health. You referred to previous "hoarded stuff", which sounds like you got extra-attached to some belongings.
Can you lend items to friends with a promise that you can get them back later?
posted by sandwich at 8:08 PM on August 30, 2023
Can you lend items to friends with a promise that you can get them back later?
posted by sandwich at 8:08 PM on August 30, 2023
Response by poster: Have you checked to see if your ticket has future travel value?
> Yes, but it is very little
Do you have enough credit to book a flight, or is your credit all used up?
> Maxed out. I should have asked for help months ago, but here we are.
Google flights has a 1-way to Toronto on Friday Sept 1 for $269 currently - WestJet to Kelowna, then Flair to Toronto.
> These sorts of multi-airline booking hacks don't account for checked luggage it seems.
Does that mean you need to get rid of all your furniture, kitchen items, books, most clothes, etc?
> I got rid of most things that aren't furniture (which I'll just abandon) and am down to 3-4 amazon boxes of stuff in addition to my luggage. Currently figuring out the cheapest way to transport these things and/or if more things (e.g. books) need to be discarded.
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 10:49 AM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
> Yes, but it is very little
Do you have enough credit to book a flight, or is your credit all used up?
> Maxed out. I should have asked for help months ago, but here we are.
Google flights has a 1-way to Toronto on Friday Sept 1 for $269 currently - WestJet to Kelowna, then Flair to Toronto.
> These sorts of multi-airline booking hacks don't account for checked luggage it seems.
Does that mean you need to get rid of all your furniture, kitchen items, books, most clothes, etc?
> I got rid of most things that aren't furniture (which I'll just abandon) and am down to 3-4 amazon boxes of stuff in addition to my luggage. Currently figuring out the cheapest way to transport these things and/or if more things (e.g. books) need to be discarded.
posted by Freelance Demiurge at 10:49 AM on August 31, 2023 [1 favorite]
I didn't see this question at the time, but it came up for me as a similar question just now when I asked one about anxiety. That cycle of procrastination and panic is familiar to me. I do hope you are feeling better now.
posted by paduasoy at 11:20 AM on October 11, 2023
posted by paduasoy at 11:20 AM on October 11, 2023
You are not logged in, either login or create an account to post comments
How many bags do you need to check? Do you have pets you're traveling with?
Do you know anyone else, anywhere else in the world, that you can stay with for even a few days while you put up an emergency GoFundMe or request for Venmo/Paypal donations? How much are airline tickets (or bus tickets, or train tickets) to those places?
Feel free to memail me if you would prefer.
posted by peppercorn at 11:40 AM on August 29, 2023