Should I try to move our "porch cat" with us?

May 9, 2023 7:48 AM

We (along with other neighbors) were feeding a neighborhood stray at our old house but now we're moving. I figured she'd be okay staying in the old neighborhood where I know at least one other family are looking out for her, but an encounter with her today is making me feel sad about leaving her.

Where we live there are loads of stray and feral cats and it's common for people to participate in the care of some of these so-called porch cats or community cats by leaving out food and water and maybe, if they have the means, get them fixed or get them emergency vet care when needed.

We started leaving out food and water at our old house for a friendly neighborhood stray we'll call Buttercup. The guys across the street do the same. But now we've moved across town. I stopped by the old place today to pick up an errant package and found Buttercup on the porch and she was all over me - extremely affectionate and acting like she wanted to come with me, milling around my open car door. Maybe it was just a ploy for food but it broke my heart. I felt like she waiting for us to come back and was just so happy to see me. She looked a little a skinny too (she is an older girl, though).

Now, I'm considering scooping her up and taking her with us to the new house/neighborhood but there are some reasons I'm hesitant.

1) We already have four damn cats in a three person household. I feel like I'm veering close to animal hoarder territory and they all already have expensive food and vet bills.

2) The guys across the street might miss her. They have a fancy food and water dish just for her on their porch so I know they're at least somewhat invested

3) Converting her to house cat status might be hard or impossible. We tried to take her inside our basement once when a violent storm was forecasted and she howled until we let her back out.

4) Our new neighbors have 4 extremely aggressive pitbulls. Though they are behind a tall and secure fence and I assume Buttercup is fairly street smart - I'm definitely worried about that and the fact that I might be taking her to a place that is less safe/familiar for her. Do cats know to stay away from aggressive dogs or yards full of them?

What would a sensible but kind person do in this situation?

posted by Brain Sturgeon to Pets & Animals (15 answers total)

Take her. Of course there will be difficult adjustments, but you know that she'll be so much better off -- infinitely better off -- with you.
posted by BlahLaLa at 7:53 AM on May 9, 2023 [1 favorite]

Do not take her. The guys across the street are already keeping an eye on her.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 7:57 AM on May 9, 2023 [35 favorites]

A sensible but kind person would talk to the guys across the street and make sure they're planning on continuing to look after her, and maybe offer them a few bucks toward her care or a couple bags of her food. A kind person might also take her in to get fixed, if she isn't already.

I'm not sure it's true that she'll be infinitely better off moved across town to an unknown neighborhood with four other cats and aggressive dogs nearby. It takes cats awhile to adjust to a new space and if she's already settled in to her neighborhood and looked after there, it's probably best to leave her.
posted by CheeseLouise at 8:01 AM on May 9, 2023 [51 favorites]

Don't take her. Cats bond to their territory. She has people looking out for her. Plus you already know from previous experience that she would be miserable as a house cat.
posted by unicorn chaser at 8:11 AM on May 9, 2023 [8 favorites]

It sounds like she would not be happy as a house cat, and relocating her to a new street will make you happy, not necessarily her.

Talk to the other neighbors who look after her, and if it turns out that they're on the verge of moving, or Buttercup has been despondent in your absence, then it might be worth it.
posted by adamrice at 8:35 AM on May 9, 2023 [2 favorites]

I would probably have a different answer if this were a young cat, or one who enjoyed coming inside with you during the storm, or who didn’t have other humans taking care of her, but I agree that Buttercup seems pretty well-situated in her current environment. I think talking to the neighbors is a good idea, to verify they’re still committed and to offer any help if they need it. They might also be willing to send you updates or pictures, which might help you feel better.

And maybe try to come back to visit when you can? It’s clear Buttercup has bonded with you and welcomes it—that seems like a better option to me than a big disruption for this specific, older cat.
posted by CtrlAltDelete at 8:45 AM on May 9, 2023 [9 favorites]

Yeah, I think it can't hurt to talk to the neighbors to make sure they will be looking out for her in the long run, but you're projecting:

Buttercup on the porch and she was all over me - extremely affectionate and acting like she wanted to come with me

I mean, is this unusual for this cat? Do you know she isn't very affectionate towards most people?

Anyway, if she is an older cat, she will not be happy as an indoor only cat - especially if you'd be forcing her to adapt to four strange cats. So a potential question might be, which outdoor space is safer for her? It doesn't sound like that's your outdoor space.

In short, I'd occasionally visit if you like, and give the neighbors your number and let them know that if Buttercup ever needs medical attention, you'll be happy to help out (assuming that's true).
posted by coffeecat at 8:48 AM on May 9, 2023 [1 favorite]

As hard as it is, I would leave her in her own territory—especially if there are other people looking out for her.
posted by vitout at 8:50 AM on May 9, 2023 [2 favorites]

Response by poster: Re: the level of affection: When we used to feed her she would generally brush against your legs and allow a few pets, then eat and scamper off. When I came over today she was at my heels the whole time begging for attention, so it was a marked difference but she could have just been hungry

Will definitely try to catch the neighbors to talk to them if I can - that would go a long way toward reassuring me, I think.
posted by Brain Sturgeon at 9:01 AM on May 9, 2023 [3 favorites]

she could have just been hungry

She could also have been saying "hey, I missed you, I'm really glad to see you again" without also meaning "please take me away from all this"
posted by solotoro at 9:11 AM on May 9, 2023 [8 favorites]

Don't take her unless you (and your other cats) are prepared to make her an inside cat for the first 6 months. If you take her to your new house and just leave her outside, she will try to find her way back to her old territory and get lost. She will be way worse off lost, territory-less, and without a support system than she will be in her familiar patch being fed and watered by your neighbours.
posted by heatherlogan at 9:24 AM on May 9, 2023 [5 favorites]

unicorn chaser: Cats bond to their territory.

That's not universal.
One time I moved, and a neighbor's cat that had gradually transmogrified to live with me moved along, after having a talk with said neighbors.

She was just "Hey, what have you done to the house oh well the couch is still there okay I'll have a nap."

Never a signal then, or later that she would go looking for the old place.
posted by Stoneshop at 10:20 AM on May 9, 2023 [1 favorite]

- You could just try, with the option of bringing her back if it doesn't work out. Tell the across-the-street guys / ask their permission

- She might not get any real interaction with anyone else. Maybe across-the-street-guys or another neighbor would be interested in more of a relationship

- See if there's a cat rescue / feral care / TNR organization in the area. They might have a decent plan, advice, or the ability to try fostering her in a safer environment. (They will probably also help get _all_ the cats spayed/neutered, which would be really, really good.)

- If she wants a home with good people, maybe there's one in your old neighborhood that you could find and facilitate that would be just right for her. If you introduce her formally -- you bring the new people out to see her, she gets all lovey with you, the new people get associated with that -- it could be really special. Some people are shy with cats because they just don't understand them yet, or they don't realize that cats need to be close to someone and have real love to give. When a new person discovers this, they usually fall in love hard.
posted by amtho at 10:29 AM on May 9, 2023 [1 favorite]

I wouldn't take her unless you'd be able to convert her to an indoor cat. I think she is better off staying where she is.
posted by wondermouse at 7:35 PM on May 9, 2023

I follow a woman on Instagram who with her husband does a lot of TNR work. They moved last year and took the feral outdoor cat ("Hissy Chrissy") with them. They kept her in a large cage until she was acclimated and eventually let her out. She remains feral but also remains in or near their back yard. If you're interested in poking around her insta to see her process, let me know and I'll find it for you.
posted by janey47 at 7:00 AM on May 10, 2023