Prolific Proposal

April 5, 2006 11:14 AM

What is the coolest / most unique / romantic marriage proposal you have ever heard of? A friend of mine is trying to come up with ideas on how to propose and I would like to tell him a few awesome anecdotes.
posted by jasondigitized to Human Relations (30 answers total)

Someone I know recently proposed during a Scrabble game. He slipped the ring into the letter pouch just before all the letters were gone and spelled MARRY ME on the board while she was digging in the pouch. Too cute.
posted by logovisual at 11:17 AM on April 5, 2006 [1 favorite]

Boyfriend made model airplanes. I told him I wanted a model of the Red Baron's plane, which he made for my birthday.

The plane model came with three small figurines - two crew members and the Baron himself. Boyfriend held the box in which he'd put the plane, and handed me each figure individually to unwrap.

As he handed me the final figurine (the Baron), he told me to be careful, as this one was fragile. He also "accidentally" dropped the box that he'd been holding.

Around the Baron's neck is a diamond ring.

I look at boyfriend, he is on one knee.

And that is the story of how Mr. Lucinda became Mr. Lucinda.
posted by Lucinda at 11:22 AM on April 5, 2006

I proposed to her in front of the altar on top of the Tepozteco, in Tepoztlan. It was nice - I wanted our marriage to be blessed by Ometochtli, God of Booze.
It was a really arduous climb (we both have some experience) - halfway up the mountain there was a thunderstorm, we took shelter in a cave...
When you reach the top of the mountain you sort of pass through this tiny stone niche onto the Western face, and the sun hits you in full force with all of Central Mexico layed out in front of you. There was a guy up there selling tequila and pulque, he must have carried it up every morning (incredible!) - we passed on the tequila but had some pulque to celebrate the event. There were also these weird monkey-beasts that I have never seen anywhere else. They're supposed to be some sort of spiritual guardian, I think.
Then we had to wait a bit before climbing back down.

Here's some other dude's travel journal of Tepoztlan. Pictures are kind of meh but he's got a photo of the monkey-beasts. and it's not an Aztec pyramid. It's Tlahuilcan.
posted by Baby_Balrog at 11:42 AM on April 5, 2006

One of my friends proposed to his girlfriend with a crossword puzzle because they always enjoyed doing puzzles together. They were going on a trip together and flying into one airport from different cities, then going on to another city. When he met her at the airport, he handed her a puzzle and said he needed help finishing it. Of course he had altered one of the clues to read "Will you marry me?" and of course she said yes.

Then he made her actually write "yes" into the puzzle and had it framed, and it now hangs on the wall of their bedroom.
posted by leesh at 12:06 PM on April 5, 2006

A friend organized an elaborate scavenger hunt for his now-wife that involved places and things that were special to the both of them, mixed in was a pamper session at a spa and the big finish was dinner at one of their favourite restaurants where he proposed.
posted by phoenixc at 12:12 PM on April 5, 2006 [1 favorite]

These are all lovely...

But your friend needs to look at what's important and special in his relationship. Ganking ideas from other people is all very nice and gives you the warm fuzzies and all, but the one thing they all have in common is that they're deeply and intensely personal.
posted by dirtynumbangelboy at 12:17 PM on April 5, 2006

A friend had been working on a shoot for a tv show during which one of the crew's DV cameras was stolen. A month later, her boyfriend fabricated a letter from the LAPD saying that the camera had not been recovered, but its case and DV tapes had been. She directed them to ship her the case and tapes. When the Fed-Ex package arrived, her boyfriend suggested that they watch the tapes to see if any of the footage had survived. On one of the tapes was his pre-recorded proposal.
posted by xo at 12:21 PM on April 5, 2006

I know of a couple that enjoyed Boggle; on Christmas, he gave her a new 5x5 set with Will You Marry Me [Name] glued in. He shook, they played, and she actually came up with "Marry" as one of her words... and she was so competitive, she didn't catch on until they were done scoring their points.

(She won.)
posted by hamster at 12:34 PM on April 5, 2006

these are all very nice ideas. i'd caution your friend, however, not to miss the boat on the proposal itself! i think sometimes guys spend so much time thinking about the activities that will get them to "the moment" that they don't make enough of a point of saying something really sweet about why they want their honey to marry them. this is a shame, since you only get to say and hear this speech once. for me, i'd pass up any day full of scavenger hunting in favor of a wonderfully heart-felt speech about why he'd like to spend his life with me. better yet, do both!
posted by bigd at 12:35 PM on April 5, 2006 [1 favorite]

I worked with a guy who proposed to his wife in the most lovely way. She's an art-lover - loves to go to museums and galleries. He arranged with a small gallery nearby to use one of their free-standing glass display cases. Inside was her engagement ring on a pedestal, with a card propped in front with the proposal written on it. He asked the gallery owner to snap a pic when they got to the case and she noticed the true meaning of the display. Priceless!
posted by Flakypastry at 12:36 PM on April 5, 2006

My good friend and fellow lifeguard had a novel approach... on a day that his intended (also a lifeguard) was working, he dressed himself in a white tuxedo and had me and another off-duty guard bury him up to his waste in sand on the beach. We then put a 55-gallon steel drum over him, cut to look as though it were partially buried in the sand, and then had 911 dispatch call his intended to tell her that a mysterious barrel had washed up on the beach, and that she needed to investigate and report back. When she arrived 10 minutes later, she walked around the barrel a few times, and then finally touched it, at which point it fell over, my friend leapt out of the sand, dusted himself off, and proposed.

Worked like a charm.
posted by saladin at 12:51 PM on April 5, 2006

On my first date with my (now) fiancé we were at the shore in New Jersey and it was a cold, grey, blustery, crappy day. Trekking back up the beach we saw something lodged in the sand, which upon closer inspection turned out to be a can of pineapple chunks. We thought this was hilarious - "real" beaches have pineapples and coconuts, Jersey beaches have rusting cans thereof (natch).

The day we got engaged we were at a very lovely beach in south Florida, taking a walk, and I found another can of pineapple. The fiancé nonchalantly whips a can opener out of his pocket, so we camp out and open it up and of course there's no pineapple inside, but a ring nestled in tissue paper.

He had prepped the can by opening the bottom and soldering it shut with the ring inside, then planting it.

As an added cute bonus, the ring is yellow gold with an emerald - viewed from the side it "looks like" a pineapple - yellow round thing with green bits on top.
posted by miagaille at 12:55 PM on April 5, 2006

One of my friends asked his girlfriend to dinner. Then had dinner catered to a local park - complete with a violinist and maitre d'. At the appropriate time, (dessert of course) he asked her to marry him on bended knee of course. The voilinist broke into an appropriate song, and his girlfriend and the maitre d' broke down into tears. The violinist and maitre d' were friends of his from a local resturant and were helping him out.

The only caveat is to second what dirtynumbangelboy said; your friend can't grank others ideas. This person must decide on what is special to the two of them. Proposing in a park is romantic, but what is more special is that the two of them spent a lot of time walking in the park on dates early in their relationship, because they were both students and on a limited budget. It has to be pertinent to the two of them, rather than something out of Bride magazine.
posted by fox_terrier_guy at 1:01 PM on April 5, 2006

I proposed to my fiance in the window of a tower on Catalina Island off the coast of CA. It was perfect...I waited until other people were out of the tower and then we climbed the steps...you could see the boats bobbing in the bay through the window. However, it was not super planned. I simply knew at some point during my trip to LA I was going to propose to her. I had a few ideas...I knew she didn't like public spectacles so that helped narrow things down.

All I can suggest is know what she likes/doesn't like. Do a little research but don't plan a huge production (cause you never know what may happen the day of) and then just go for it when the moment/location is right.
posted by UMDirector at 1:17 PM on April 5, 2006

I've also thought that the more elaborate the idea, the more chances that things can go wrong. You want memorable and poignant, not memorable and funny-cuz-it-sucked.

We were standing on the Athabaska glacier in Banff, and I just asked her.
posted by frogan at 1:17 PM on April 5, 2006

My fiance took me to Armstrong National Park and proposed to me on the stage of the forrest theater. I spent a lot of my childhood in that park, so it was special to me personally that it was there. What was wacky about it was the first time he pulled me up on the stage some totally drunk yokels took that moment to wander by, so he just kind of stood there awkwardly til they left. After they toddled off he dropped to one knee and blurted out "Marry me babe!" I think the interruption might have made him a little skitish (Marry me babe?? Hee!) but I still loved it.
posted by supercrayon at 1:37 PM on April 5, 2006

I'd like to go for a slight derail, and ask, what is it that makes guys want to go for these elaborate, bizarre stunts? Specially-prepared tin cans? Burying yourself in sand in a white tux?

Are they doing it because they don't know how to express themselves in words?

Are they doing it because they think the more surprising and entertaining it is, the more likely she is to say yes?

Is it something we think our society requires of young men, normally regarded as fickle and shallow, to publicly make a fool of themselves over a woman to prove their love?

Are there any women who've been proposed to in these ways and didn't like it? Said no? What happens to the guy who's prepared his elaborate charade with twenty people involved who gets turned down?

I agree with bigd, don't do something huge and complicated at the expense of saying "I love you and I never want to be apart from you" or something similarly simple and meaningful.

My advice? It should be a surprise, but not too much of a surprise. Do it somewhere really nice, and do it where a party of chatty elderly tourists won't appear and spoil the moment, and take a lot of care over what you're going to say.

Having said all that, the one which impressed me most was like the crossword one above, but where the guy had arranged with the newspaper to have customised clues actually printed. I love the idea that she'd be thinking "What a coincidence, my name is the answer to one of these clues" and then going on to do the ones which read WILL, YOU, MARRY and ME...
posted by AmbroseChapel at 1:56 PM on April 5, 2006 [3 favorites]

She said "I'm pregnant."
I said "I guess we ought to get married then."
Lasted 20 years.
posted by Floydd at 2:14 PM on April 5, 2006 [1 favorite]

AmbroseChapel, I *completely* agree about huge proposals. I don't think I'd want something ridiculous and embarrassing, like I'm a 12 year old being tricked into learning fractions with strawberry pie.

I sang at a proposal once in Central Park- this guy (I met in the subway while singing along with a performer, oddly enough) was proposing to his girlfriend, and wanted someone to sing "You Are the Sunshine of My Life". He was so excited about the proposal that he told her in advance he was going to do it. But still, the two of them all dressed up, him on one knee under this huge tree that he said he was going to bring her back to when they were older, while the rest of the crowd in the park watched and cheered- it was really cute.
posted by ThePinkSuperhero at 2:20 PM on April 5, 2006 [1 favorite]

I had been dating my wife for a year. She has a 9 year old son who just loves me (I am very lucky), but he would constantly say we had to be married before we could kiss. On the night I was planning to pop the question, the three of us went for a walk on the beach after dinner. After a few hugs and kisses, her son (being grossed out) once again told us we had to be married. This time he said “Here, I’ll show you how to do it.” He proceeded to get down on one knee in the sand, took my hand, and said “Will you marry me?”

I said “Oh, like this?” and got on my knee, pulled out the ring, and proposed to my wife. We were all in tears.

So, in your friend’s case, he’ll need to hire a child actor, move near the beach……

But really, I agree with another post, something meaningful and personal is far better and more romantic than a gimmick. If he has too much trouble coming up with something personal and touching, then perhaps they don’t know each other well enough yet to get married. I'm a big fan of getting friends and family involved.
posted by JimBobNoPants at 2:35 PM on April 5, 2006

Well the "most unique" prize would have to go to my dad for being completely offhand about the whole thing. Absolutely no prep, no gimmicks, no special location, just the two of them watching a movie, my dad sitting on the floor, my mom on the couch. As if it's the most natural thing in the world he turns to her and says, "So, would you marry me?" and she kinda smiles and say "Yeah, I would."

The funny part is how she didn't know he was serious until the two dozen long stem roses came to her dorm room the next morning with a very exuberant note that got her floormates all atwitter (they'd peeked in the long white box already, you see). And, in a big crowd they all ask "WHAT did you do this weekend?!" and she looks at the note and goes "Well, I uh, guess I got engaged." "You GUESS you got engaged!?!!"

This is one of my mom's favorite stories to tell, and is very in character for my dad's quiet, sincere ways when it comes to expressing affection. Basically, I think this anecedote is good for the "It doesn't have to be a big show" crowd. In the end, it's the fact he asks that's what matters, at the heart of it all. I agree that he should really think about his gal, and their relationship, and how she would like to be asked! If that means a big extravaganza, then of course he shoudl go for it.
posted by nelleish at 3:02 PM on April 5, 2006 [2 favorites]

I really like the story of how Richard Garfield, inventor of Magic the Gathering, proposed to his wife Lily. He conspired with the art department of Wizards of the Coast to create a special card, Proposal, and then when they were playing a round of Magic, which they did regularly, he slipped it onto the table. Apparently it took four games to get it into play -- a combination of nerves and adverse game conditions.

That's how a real geek does it.

The secret: do something that's personal to both of you, in character for you, and that'll make a great story to tell your grandkids.
posted by Hogshead at 3:54 PM on April 5, 2006 [1 favorite]

We were camping near Rancheria Falls in Yosemite National Park. We hiked to the falls, and she unexpectedly stripped to her birthday suit and jumped into the frickin' freezing water. I thought to myself, "Damn, this woman sure is great." I went in after her, and it hit me how wonderful and alive she always made me feel. When the cold got to be too much for me we climbed out onto a big boulder. I realized there wouldn't be a better time or place. I took off the only thing left on me (my watch), dropped to a knee, told her that everything I am and have was right in front of her, and asked if she would be my wife. No plan, no ring, no hoopla. It was just the right time and place.
posted by DakotaPaul at 5:00 PM on April 5, 2006

I've asked my partner about 10 or 12 times already, let this be a warning to you that some girls don't like the whole "so, we could go get married tomorrow" casual approach too much.
posted by The Monkey at 6:02 PM on April 5, 2006 [1 favorite]

It was half time at a Pistons-76's playoff game, and we were at home watching the game, in our jammies. I had made us a gourmet dinner of macaroni and cheese and veggie nuggets. Since it was near my birthday, my boyfriend said, "Hey, since its half time, I don't suppose you want an early birthday present, do you?" Of course I said yes. He busted out the ring, bent to one knee and popped the question. We hugged and kissed and stuff, and were done by the time half time ended. Needless to say, I didn't really watch the rest of the game, I simply sat and admired my ring. My (now) husband claims that the occasion was rendered auspicious by the 76's win. I can't even remember the rest of the game.
I agree with what most everyone is saying - I can appreciate the desire to really do it up big, but in the end, a proposal, when done right, is really just about those two people, and what means the most to them. Most women would agree that no bells and whistles are necessary.
posted by msali at 7:35 PM on April 5, 2006

When the Bride threw the bouquet, one of the groomsmen caught it (they may have planned this ahead of time), handed it to his girlfriend, and with a big grin said something like "Would you like to be next?" Very sweet.
posted by BoscosMom at 11:09 PM on April 5, 2006

A friend of mine proposed using the power of the Internet. It seems to have worked out pretty well.
posted by emmastory at 6:42 AM on April 6, 2006

I don't understand all the hating on elaborate proposals. Of course they're not necessary, but so what? They're fun, silly, and memorable.

The point is that any man who is proposing should already know exactly what his intended will enjoy. It she'll get a kick out of the hoopla, go for it. If she won't, don't. Additionally, no one should propose who doesn't already know the answer. 72 hours after we met my fiancé looked me in the eyes and told me he was going to marry me. Two years later the actual proposal was just gravy, and I think that's how it should be.

Honestly, I probably would have been mortifed if he'd prepared some saccharine speech.
posted by miagaille at 8:08 AM on April 6, 2006

sidenote: that penny arcade proposal was lovely and very sweet.
posted by echo0720 at 12:02 PM on April 6, 2006

A friend of mine was given a bitstring to decode by her computer scientist boyfriend. Months later when she finally got around to figuring it out, she discovered it contained a marriage proposal. She said yes.

Sometimes I wish I was a girl just so I could get proposed to.
posted by speicus at 9:23 PM on April 6, 2006