Wife thinks she looks like bozo. Can she fix her hair color?
September 16, 2021 11:34 AM Subscribe
My wife switched to box color and is now hilariously wearing a hat 16 hours a day.
This question is coming mostly from my wife. (Though I'm curious too because it seems this hair color thing is much more complicated than I ever thought).
Due to the pandemic our finances are not what they once were and she stopped getting her hair color at the salon. So she's been getting it done from box color at the drug store she's been having a difficult time.
Her natural hair color is salt and pepper (about 50% grey & white and 50% medium-dark brown) She's been using blonde box hair color. She said she was expecting the result to be that here grays and whites would turn blonde while her still pigmented hair wouldn't really change much because it's darker than the dye. She figured she'd end up with 50% brown and 50% blonde. But she was wrong.
Both her pigmented hair AND her gray hair are left with a strong reddish tone after she dyes it. She's tried three different blondes from Garnier and they've all turned her hair more & more red. It gets especially red towards the root area.
The grays turn more bright red while her still still pigmented hair have a more subtle red tone. But both come out quite red which is weird. She's beautiful anyway of course, because she's my girl- but I don't tell her she's right when she says it does not complement her at all.
She asked a stylist on our block about it and was recommended that she go for ASH blondes instead of Golden Blondes to combat this. But the boxes apparently just have names like "honey dip" and "almond cream" etc... so she has no idea which blondes are ashy vs golden and I sure as hell don't know either.
My wife is now walking around with a hat on her head all the time because she hates her new red hair and I'm just trying not to burst out laughing at her mistrials. It's kinda funny to me, but she's upset so I want to tread lightly for her sake. Besides the pandemic has made a lot of hard changes for a lot of people and I feel bad we can't afford for her to get her hair done like she used to.
Any insights here on why her greys and whites turn red? I mean they're really light since there's no pigment so they should be coming out blonde like the box. On the side of the box it has a table that shows what the hair is supposed to look like if a person has grey hair vs light brown hair and it doesn't look red on there at all.
This question is coming mostly from my wife. (Though I'm curious too because it seems this hair color thing is much more complicated than I ever thought).
Due to the pandemic our finances are not what they once were and she stopped getting her hair color at the salon. So she's been getting it done from box color at the drug store she's been having a difficult time.
Her natural hair color is salt and pepper (about 50% grey & white and 50% medium-dark brown) She's been using blonde box hair color. She said she was expecting the result to be that here grays and whites would turn blonde while her still pigmented hair wouldn't really change much because it's darker than the dye. She figured she'd end up with 50% brown and 50% blonde. But she was wrong.
Both her pigmented hair AND her gray hair are left with a strong reddish tone after she dyes it. She's tried three different blondes from Garnier and they've all turned her hair more & more red. It gets especially red towards the root area.
The grays turn more bright red while her still still pigmented hair have a more subtle red tone. But both come out quite red which is weird. She's beautiful anyway of course, because she's my girl- but I don't tell her she's right when she says it does not complement her at all.
She asked a stylist on our block about it and was recommended that she go for ASH blondes instead of Golden Blondes to combat this. But the boxes apparently just have names like "honey dip" and "almond cream" etc... so she has no idea which blondes are ashy vs golden and I sure as hell don't know either.
My wife is now walking around with a hat on her head all the time because she hates her new red hair and I'm just trying not to burst out laughing at her mistrials. It's kinda funny to me, but she's upset so I want to tread lightly for her sake. Besides the pandemic has made a lot of hard changes for a lot of people and I feel bad we can't afford for her to get her hair done like she used to.
Any insights here on why her greys and whites turn red? I mean they're really light since there's no pigment so they should be coming out blonde like the box. On the side of the box it has a table that shows what the hair is supposed to look like if a person has grey hair vs light brown hair and it doesn't look red on there at all.
Ugh, yes, blond is easy to get brassy. I've used Garnier Olia and 9 1/2 (lightest ash blonde) might be worth it, but it's hard to tell what the effect will be on already dyed hair. If it doesn't work, she might have to go to the stylist once after all to get it back to a decent baseline.
posted by I claim sanctuary at 11:41 AM on September 16, 2021 [2 favorites]
posted by I claim sanctuary at 11:41 AM on September 16, 2021 [2 favorites]
The companies usually will tell you if it's an ash blonde if you look clsoely. Here's L'Oreal's ash blonde range.
posted by praemunire at 11:43 AM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
posted by praemunire at 11:43 AM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
I haven't had to use this, but Overtone does sell some toning conditioners - I think she'd want the green or the blue conditioners to get rid of the red/orangeness (other manufacturers also make toning conditioners too, probably).
They also make a color fader, if she just wants to get rid of her current color and try again.
posted by dinty_moore at 11:43 AM on September 16, 2021 [9 favorites]
They also make a color fader, if she just wants to get rid of her current color and try again.
posted by dinty_moore at 11:43 AM on September 16, 2021 [9 favorites]
P.S. Hair dyeing mishaps are indeed traumatic and you're doing great to be supportive of her and not laugh.
posted by praemunire at 11:43 AM on September 16, 2021 [18 favorites]
posted by praemunire at 11:43 AM on September 16, 2021 [18 favorites]
Oh, also, spot dye a lock of hair from behind the ear before trying again. Kind of like putting a spot of color on a wall before painting the entire room, only your head.
posted by dinty_moore at 11:49 AM on September 16, 2021 [8 favorites]
posted by dinty_moore at 11:49 AM on September 16, 2021 [8 favorites]
...her still pigmented hair wouldn't really change much because it's darker than the dye.
In my experience this bit is 100% not true for box color. The ones for blond colors aren't just color but also things that will lighten hair (bleach, I guess?). I'm not sure if this has anything to do with her hair turning red, but it might. Maybe try one closer to her natural color to reset everything?
posted by Sabby at 11:54 AM on September 16, 2021 [10 favorites]
In my experience this bit is 100% not true for box color. The ones for blond colors aren't just color but also things that will lighten hair (bleach, I guess?). I'm not sure if this has anything to do with her hair turning red, but it might. Maybe try one closer to her natural color to reset everything?
posted by Sabby at 11:54 AM on September 16, 2021 [10 favorites]
It's been forever since I dyed my dark brown hair, but in the old days turning red was from a bleaching step that came before the blonde dye. But in the old days that was a separate tube of bleach. Could modern formulations have mixed the bleach in with the dye? I've been reading a dye company's "for grey hair" section and there isn't anything I can see about turning only the greys blonde, or which dyes lighten as well as retint. How annoying.
For a while I was using henna dyes without bleaches, and I have found a company that promises no bleaches in their henna tints, but the blondest one is reddish-blonde. Would the "light brown dye" of this henna dye be good as her highlights? Looking at other natural, no-bleach dyes might help.
Very nice glossifying effect, iirc.
posted by clew at 12:00 PM on September 16, 2021
For a while I was using henna dyes without bleaches, and I have found a company that promises no bleaches in their henna tints, but the blondest one is reddish-blonde. Would the "light brown dye" of this henna dye be good as her highlights? Looking at other natural, no-bleach dyes might help.
Very nice glossifying effect, iirc.
posted by clew at 12:00 PM on September 16, 2021
She needs a toner (basically a dye with just enough bleach to let the colour into the hair follicle) to counteract the brassy tone. The colour of the dye (toner) would need to be opposite to the brassy colour on a colour wheel. If it’s a brassy yellow, toner should be more purple. If more of an orange, toner should be more blue. (Both would be mixed with some neutral tones.)
Also, the toner needs to be as intense/dark as the darkest/most intense reddish tone. So odds are your wife will have to tone it darker, so not to a blonde but more of an ashy brown (neutral with purple/blue undertones).
Another option would be to go blonde. For that she would need to continue to bleach it until it’s as pale as the inside of a banana peel. Then she could tone with a light purple tone and would end up with a nice blonde. Note this option involves a lot of upkeep and it’s not necessarily cheaper, because it does more damage to hair. So in addition to the cost of the dye, she’d need expensive conditioners and probably olaplex rebonder to make it look decent.
So I’d recommend toning down to an ashy brown. (Probably to around level 5 if she’s a natural brunette and her hair is currently orange. Levels and colour info will be made clearer in the link I’ll add at the bottom.)
So for toning, she will need 10 vol bleach, and two tubes of colour, one neutral (marked N) and one “ash” or violet. The Wella brand has excellent colours and is cheap, the pros use it. She can get it at a beauty supply store (like Sally’s, online), same with the bleach. Just follow instructions at the link
Voila
posted by cotton dress sock at 12:05 PM on September 16, 2021 [7 favorites]
Also, the toner needs to be as intense/dark as the darkest/most intense reddish tone. So odds are your wife will have to tone it darker, so not to a blonde but more of an ashy brown (neutral with purple/blue undertones).
Another option would be to go blonde. For that she would need to continue to bleach it until it’s as pale as the inside of a banana peel. Then she could tone with a light purple tone and would end up with a nice blonde. Note this option involves a lot of upkeep and it’s not necessarily cheaper, because it does more damage to hair. So in addition to the cost of the dye, she’d need expensive conditioners and probably olaplex rebonder to make it look decent.
So I’d recommend toning down to an ashy brown. (Probably to around level 5 if she’s a natural brunette and her hair is currently orange. Levels and colour info will be made clearer in the link I’ll add at the bottom.)
So for toning, she will need 10 vol bleach, and two tubes of colour, one neutral (marked N) and one “ash” or violet. The Wella brand has excellent colours and is cheap, the pros use it. She can get it at a beauty supply store (like Sally’s, online), same with the bleach. Just follow instructions at the link
Voila
posted by cotton dress sock at 12:05 PM on September 16, 2021 [7 favorites]
She's used three boxes in a row? Or over several months? This sounds super stressful. I don't think she should keep using box dye! I don't think the short term answer here is "find the right color." Can you all afford for her to go to a color specialist for a color correction? And then she can get advice from them on where to go from there. I don't recommend going to just anyone, but someone who is well-versed with color correction.
If that's too expensive... then, I still think she needs some professional advice. Color isn't just dye being layered on top of your natural color.
posted by bluedaisy at 12:14 PM on September 16, 2021 [10 favorites]
If that's too expensive... then, I still think she needs some professional advice. Color isn't just dye being layered on top of your natural color.
posted by bluedaisy at 12:14 PM on September 16, 2021 [10 favorites]
The drugstore color usually does describe itself as ash or something else (usually "golden") but if it's not giving her the results she wants, the stuff the professionals use is available at beauty supply stores (not drugstores.) The tones there are identified by number/letter combos. It's been too long since I did it to reliably remember the details, but a pro should be able to tell her exactly what combo to use for lift (bleach) and tone - those are separate processes.
That said, it sounds like her hair is giving unexpected results so it would be best to pay for a color, and get the advice from a pro who's looking at her actual hair, both before and after the dye job, and can speak to any specific or unusual needs that we can't see.
posted by fingersandtoes at 12:25 PM on September 16, 2021 [1 favorite]
That said, it sounds like her hair is giving unexpected results so it would be best to pay for a color, and get the advice from a pro who's looking at her actual hair, both before and after the dye job, and can speak to any specific or unusual needs that we can't see.
posted by fingersandtoes at 12:25 PM on September 16, 2021 [1 favorite]
I agree with both bluedaisy on the basic science of it and if i had a penguin...on the most hassle-free consumer solution.
I'm going to offer my two cents as someone who's been consistently cutting and dyeing my own hair (dark brown to platinum then later pinks and blues etc depending on my mood) in the last two years thanks to the pandemic, but i used to do this consistently in college and in my early working years.
1. No more box anything that has colour for now, not even toner.
-- the issue is likely brassiness but also the unanticipated results that can't be fixed using box dyes and drugstore toners because you only need one of the two steps that's packaged. All of the ones that's ready to use is a combination of a developer + dye. Developer is basically their proprietary blend of what's essentially hydrogen peroxide. To get the dyes fixed in your follicles, the peroxide lifts the hair scales for the dye to be deposited.
The problem is by only looking at drugstore solutions, you're continually depositing new colour with some minimal removal of the previous colour (which happens with the peroxide). This is why continually trying to fix it with the boxes dyes isn't working as well as she likes. The red/brassiness indicates as well that her hair is really quite dark and requires a lot of lift ie bleach.
She basically needs to bleach her hair, both to remove the previous tints but also to prep her hair to the proper lift/lightness levels to get to the blonde she likes.
2. This needs to happen before your wife is even thinking of toning or applying an ashy colour.
- ashy is basically the cooler tones of a colour range (versus the warm tones usually assigned as 'gold/en's). You can definitely check websites or salon references for a general sense of the coding assigned by the manufacturer or look for 'ash' or 'cool'. You might need to look at salon suppliers simply because at consumer level, the naming of the products is market-tested to appeal to your psychology hence the food names.
If bleaching sounds too scary, i would suggest searching for colour removers/strippers which is a bit more foolproof and is meant to achieve the same thing.
The reason i will recommend bleaching/decolouring is because the tones are a different colour temperature and because the way dye pigments work, overlaying the new one over the current dyes in the hair follicles will not work out as intended.
I hope this doesn't read as too unnerving, it's absolutely possible to do at home! I suggest looking at salon supply shops rather than the average drugstore. But if your wife doesn't want to do so, that's ok too, and i hope my answer here clarifies what's happening with her hair. If you have the knack for it, the salon suppliers are absolutely an economical choice in the long run, but honestly this is why salon professionals are worth their weight in gold.
posted by cendawanita at 12:43 PM on September 16, 2021 [4 favorites]
I'm going to offer my two cents as someone who's been consistently cutting and dyeing my own hair (dark brown to platinum then later pinks and blues etc depending on my mood) in the last two years thanks to the pandemic, but i used to do this consistently in college and in my early working years.
1. No more box anything that has colour for now, not even toner.
-- the issue is likely brassiness but also the unanticipated results that can't be fixed using box dyes and drugstore toners because you only need one of the two steps that's packaged. All of the ones that's ready to use is a combination of a developer + dye. Developer is basically their proprietary blend of what's essentially hydrogen peroxide. To get the dyes fixed in your follicles, the peroxide lifts the hair scales for the dye to be deposited.
The problem is by only looking at drugstore solutions, you're continually depositing new colour with some minimal removal of the previous colour (which happens with the peroxide). This is why continually trying to fix it with the boxes dyes isn't working as well as she likes. The red/brassiness indicates as well that her hair is really quite dark and requires a lot of lift ie bleach.
She basically needs to bleach her hair, both to remove the previous tints but also to prep her hair to the proper lift/lightness levels to get to the blonde she likes.
2. This needs to happen before your wife is even thinking of toning or applying an ashy colour.
- ashy is basically the cooler tones of a colour range (versus the warm tones usually assigned as 'gold/en's). You can definitely check websites or salon references for a general sense of the coding assigned by the manufacturer or look for 'ash' or 'cool'. You might need to look at salon suppliers simply because at consumer level, the naming of the products is market-tested to appeal to your psychology hence the food names.
If bleaching sounds too scary, i would suggest searching for colour removers/strippers which is a bit more foolproof and is meant to achieve the same thing.
The reason i will recommend bleaching/decolouring is because the tones are a different colour temperature and because the way dye pigments work, overlaying the new one over the current dyes in the hair follicles will not work out as intended.
I hope this doesn't read as too unnerving, it's absolutely possible to do at home! I suggest looking at salon supply shops rather than the average drugstore. But if your wife doesn't want to do so, that's ok too, and i hope my answer here clarifies what's happening with her hair. If you have the knack for it, the salon suppliers are absolutely an economical choice in the long run, but honestly this is why salon professionals are worth their weight in gold.
posted by cendawanita at 12:43 PM on September 16, 2021 [4 favorites]
Agree with the suggestions below to fix the brassiness, but also...color correcting is really hard. The fastest fix would probably be to pick up a dark dye that matches her natural hair that isn't gray yet.
Also for future rounds, the way to avoid all of this is to find colors without any bleach in them. Without bleach, the color may change the tone of the darker hair a bit, but it won't be able to lighten it drastically like this. That said, some gray is hard to cover because gray hair doesn't take color as easily, so YMMV - some colors are better at covering gray than others.
Personally I've had good luck with madison reed. They have a quiz that will provide colors that are in a safe color range for your natural hair color, which means its almost impossible to screw up as long as you don't buy something outside their recos, which would probably leave your wife with a darker shade than she may be hoping for.
posted by amycup at 12:46 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
Also for future rounds, the way to avoid all of this is to find colors without any bleach in them. Without bleach, the color may change the tone of the darker hair a bit, but it won't be able to lighten it drastically like this. That said, some gray is hard to cover because gray hair doesn't take color as easily, so YMMV - some colors are better at covering gray than others.
Personally I've had good luck with madison reed. They have a quiz that will provide colors that are in a safe color range for your natural hair color, which means its almost impossible to screw up as long as you don't buy something outside their recos, which would probably leave your wife with a darker shade than she may be hoping for.
posted by amycup at 12:46 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
For what it's worth, i decided to review the Schwarzkopf Igora line and idk, might be helpful for her?
On preview, yes, i agree, a demi- or semi-permanent colour might work better for the home user. I do want to reiterate that at drugstore-level, none of the boxed dyes would contain bleach, just peroxide, which provides some lift but not a lot which is why if one has dark hair with no bleaching step, applying a blonde dye straightaway, even for grey coverage, can be a bit dicey in expected results, and that redness/brassiness is quite common. The hair basically wasn't lightened enough.
posted by cendawanita at 12:52 PM on September 16, 2021
On preview, yes, i agree, a demi- or semi-permanent colour might work better for the home user. I do want to reiterate that at drugstore-level, none of the boxed dyes would contain bleach, just peroxide, which provides some lift but not a lot which is why if one has dark hair with no bleaching step, applying a blonde dye straightaway, even for grey coverage, can be a bit dicey in expected results, and that redness/brassiness is quite common. The hair basically wasn't lightened enough.
posted by cendawanita at 12:52 PM on September 16, 2021
Box dye does the color lifting and color depositing all in one step--so when she is dying her hair blonde, she's actually bleaching it, then depositing the blonde tones on top. That's why her hair is pulling red and getting brassy. If she's already dyed it repeatedly the answer (unfortunately if she wants blonde in the end) to do a darker color, maybe close to her natural brown, for a bit and let it grow out for a while. Even if you use a color lifter, the hair underneath has been lightened, so the color won't be quite right, and continuing to lighten her hair after it's been dyed so many times is going to end with it breaking off.
posted by assenav at 12:56 PM on September 16, 2021 [7 favorites]
posted by assenav at 12:56 PM on September 16, 2021 [7 favorites]
I don't dye my hair, but my sisters both have medium brown hair, use light brown color and have gold highlights where the white hairs don't get very dark. Try non-permanent dye.
Can you afford a session with a colorist at a good salon? To get the red repaired and a good choice for future color? I think that would be a great gift.
posted by theora55 at 1:24 PM on September 16, 2021
Can you afford a session with a colorist at a good salon? To get the red repaired and a good choice for future color? I think that would be a great gift.
posted by theora55 at 1:24 PM on September 16, 2021
This is a job for an Aveda Institute! Or other very reputable beauty school. Prices are very reasonable. Good luck to her!
posted by cyndigo at 1:40 PM on September 16, 2021 [2 favorites]
posted by cyndigo at 1:40 PM on September 16, 2021 [2 favorites]
Assenav has it. There is a lot of chemistry at work here and without understanding the chemistry, you are gambling. She needs to stop dying her hair blonde over blonde, do a colour lift or home bleach, tone it with purple toner, let it dry, and re-dye with a box dye that is the actual colour she wants the next day. The hair cuticle will be VERY open after the bleach so personally I would box dye once for half the recommended time, dry, and then box dye the same colour again if the colour isn't rich enough. YouTube is your friend here and it's fine that everyone tormenting their hair this way is 17, they do this every month and have this shit down.
I hate Garnier by the way, it's shit on grey. I use Clairol. There are multiple Ahe Blondes labled as such.
posted by DarlingBri at 1:44 PM on September 16, 2021 [1 favorite]
I hate Garnier by the way, it's shit on grey. I use Clairol. There are multiple Ahe Blondes labled as such.
posted by DarlingBri at 1:44 PM on September 16, 2021 [1 favorite]
Get her a purple shampoo right now and that will tone down the brassiness. It will actually be purple liquid in the bottle, no joke. But it helps. Purple is on the opposite side of the color wheel from yellow. I use Milk Shake Silver Shine. Pretty much all box dyes go brassy, so definitely only use ones that say “cool” and never “warm” if being too reddish gold is a tendency for you. Ignore the cute names like Honey and Chocolate. Look at the numbers. I used to use a 7C (cool or ash) but it was too blond, so now I use a 6C. As I get grayer, I might move down to 5C. It seems like gray hairs lose dye and look blond over time.
Also, yes, box dyes will affect all the hairs they touch, including lightening existing dark hair. It’s a crude but affordable method.
posted by Knowyournuts at 2:04 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
Also, yes, box dyes will affect all the hairs they touch, including lightening existing dark hair. It’s a crude but affordable method.
posted by Knowyournuts at 2:04 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
She figured she'd end up with 50% brown and 50% blonde. This is not how bleaching hair to blond works.
By using box blond, she's bleached the brown, but it's not lifted (bleached) enough from the box and so she's red instead of blond. The bleach in the blond box color will not selectively target the white/gray hairs, it will bleach all the hair indiscriminately and will pull very red as lifting to a light blond is technically very difficult and better left to professionals. Going from a darker brown to blond using box dye is almost never successful without getting unwanted red/orange or crayon yellow tones.
Unfortunately, Garnier permanent color also contains metallic salts which make color correction far more difficult and also can lead to a "chemical haircut" which is what happens when the hair is so damaged that it breaks off. She might do best by calling the Garnier color hotline (the number is on the box or the website) and talking to them about next steps for going dark after her rounds of box bleaching.
It's much easier for her to go dark if she wants to stick with box color. She should stop using all blond box color whether it's ash toned or not (the advice from the neighbor stylist was quite bad - disregard it), especially if she's tried to solve this problem with using more boxes. Her hair is getting quite damaged by this process and the results will not improve if she keeps using blond color box dye. If she can't get a color correction (a very expensive salon treatment), she could get a non-permanent deposit dye in a darker, cool toned brown and do an all over color and then leave it be to help her hair recover.
posted by quince at 2:10 PM on September 16, 2021 [12 favorites]
By using box blond, she's bleached the brown, but it's not lifted (bleached) enough from the box and so she's red instead of blond. The bleach in the blond box color will not selectively target the white/gray hairs, it will bleach all the hair indiscriminately and will pull very red as lifting to a light blond is technically very difficult and better left to professionals. Going from a darker brown to blond using box dye is almost never successful without getting unwanted red/orange or crayon yellow tones.
Unfortunately, Garnier permanent color also contains metallic salts which make color correction far more difficult and also can lead to a "chemical haircut" which is what happens when the hair is so damaged that it breaks off. She might do best by calling the Garnier color hotline (the number is on the box or the website) and talking to them about next steps for going dark after her rounds of box bleaching.
It's much easier for her to go dark if she wants to stick with box color. She should stop using all blond box color whether it's ash toned or not (the advice from the neighbor stylist was quite bad - disregard it), especially if she's tried to solve this problem with using more boxes. Her hair is getting quite damaged by this process and the results will not improve if she keeps using blond color box dye. If she can't get a color correction (a very expensive salon treatment), she could get a non-permanent deposit dye in a darker, cool toned brown and do an all over color and then leave it be to help her hair recover.
posted by quince at 2:10 PM on September 16, 2021 [12 favorites]
If she is intent on fixing this herself and to avoid future disasters she may find these two videos helpful to understand how hair colour and colour charts work - hair colour basics and colour charts.
posted by koahiatamadl at 2:37 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
posted by koahiatamadl at 2:37 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
She should stop using all blond box color whether it's ash toned or not
While I pointed out the ash blonde range for one company, I agree with this. I am not a spendthrift on hair, but if I were to ever go blonde, I'd go to a stylist. There are too many things that can go wrong when you have to bleach the hair to lighten it and make it take a blonder color, as your wife has sadly discovered.
posted by praemunire at 2:40 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
While I pointed out the ash blonde range for one company, I agree with this. I am not a spendthrift on hair, but if I were to ever go blonde, I'd go to a stylist. There are too many things that can go wrong when you have to bleach the hair to lighten it and make it take a blonder color, as your wife has sadly discovered.
posted by praemunire at 2:40 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
I agree that if there is an Aveda Institute near you, that is an economical solution. The students are supervised by trained professionals who, at least in my experience, are good about seeing to it that you as the client get a result you like. It does help to explain carefully beforehand what you want, though, preferably with pictures.
I have not had good experiences with box dye or with trying to fix the results of a bad dye job. I do not recommend it if you aren't 100 percent sure of what you are doing.
posted by Armed Only With Hubris at 3:15 PM on September 16, 2021
I have not had good experiences with box dye or with trying to fix the results of a bad dye job. I do not recommend it if you aren't 100 percent sure of what you are doing.
posted by Armed Only With Hubris at 3:15 PM on September 16, 2021
Some of these answers seem to be assuming that Mme. fantasticness wanted to turn all her hair blonde. As I read it she wanted to turn only her grey hair blonde and not change the dark brown hair.
posted by clew at 3:41 PM on September 16, 2021 [2 favorites]
posted by clew at 3:41 PM on September 16, 2021 [2 favorites]
Clew, I agree that's what the ask seems to focus on, but that's really not a realistic goal so the answers are reflecting that.
OP, I strongly encourage your wife to go to an Aveda student salon for whatever color correction they are able to do. Continuing with box dye at this point is only going to further damage her hair, which will limit what a professional is able to achieve, short of cutting the damaged portions away until she has sufficient regrowth to work with.
posted by ananci at 4:15 PM on September 16, 2021
OP, I strongly encourage your wife to go to an Aveda student salon for whatever color correction they are able to do. Continuing with box dye at this point is only going to further damage her hair, which will limit what a professional is able to achieve, short of cutting the damaged portions away until she has sufficient regrowth to work with.
posted by ananci at 4:15 PM on September 16, 2021
For the future, I think what she was hoping for is not a dye but a glaze, which sits on top of the hair shaft but doesn’t penetrate it or chemically change it.
posted by showbiz_liz at 5:11 PM on September 16, 2021 [6 favorites]
posted by showbiz_liz at 5:11 PM on September 16, 2021 [6 favorites]
Once your wife's hair is back to its usual salt and pepper, the way to accomplish what she wants is with a glaze or gloss. I have similar hair, and the John Frieda Brilliant Brunette works pretty well to cover the grays with blonde. I have to use it almost daily, but only a little bit at a time.
posted by Former Congressional Representative Lenny Lemming at 5:21 PM on September 16, 2021 [1 favorite]
posted by Former Congressional Representative Lenny Lemming at 5:21 PM on September 16, 2021 [1 favorite]
I've been there. I ended up having to go to a salon to get the brassiness toned down and let it be for a few months; but fortunately the stylist taught me how to color my hair on my own to get the white hairs blonde without significantly coloring my light brown hair. She got me onto Redkin Shades EQ -- a demi-permanent color. It's a 1:1 ratio of color to processing solution -- so I mix an 1 oz of 9nb, 1 oz of 7nb with 2 oz of Redkin EQ Gloss Processing solution, paint it onto my hair, wait 20 minutes and wash out and voila, white hairs blond, brown hair still light brown. This kind of color lasts a month or so but as it's very gentle on my hair, it's not a problem on my fine hair to do it once a month. There are a lot of places to get Shades (Amazon, Walmart etc.) and there are helpful Shades EQ color charts and instructions on how to use online. Your wife will most likely want to choose one of the Neutral Brown Blonde (NB) shades.
posted by SA456 at 6:16 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
posted by SA456 at 6:16 PM on September 16, 2021 [3 favorites]
The hair color basics video that koahiatamadl linked is great! It's really interesting and it explains really clearly why her strategy is not working, and hopefully will convince her to go to a salon one last time, to fix it and to get a home dye brand recommendation going forward.
My dark hair used to turn orange from $10 box dye, too. I finally got it professionally colored and asked for a recommendation for home dye. What they suggested cost $20 instead of $10 - and it makes my roots the right colour, and my hair much less fried overall. Worth it!
posted by nouvelle-personne at 6:43 PM on September 16, 2021 [2 favorites]
My dark hair used to turn orange from $10 box dye, too. I finally got it professionally colored and asked for a recommendation for home dye. What they suggested cost $20 instead of $10 - and it makes my roots the right colour, and my hair much less fried overall. Worth it!
posted by nouvelle-personne at 6:43 PM on September 16, 2021 [2 favorites]
koahitamadl, thanks for those videos also. I clicked on another one about her hair bleaching experience and apparently in the US, it's not as easy to get the salon stuff to use at home the way she's been doing it in Russia (or me here). That explains quite a bit! I'll keep this in mind when other US-based Asks come up.
posted by cendawanita at 9:13 PM on September 16, 2021
posted by cendawanita at 9:13 PM on September 16, 2021
Very surprised no one mentioned this, but if she purchased her box color from Clairol or L’Oréal, they have a whole department of customer service people who are trained in this - and in their products and what they do - and can talk her through next steps.
posted by Mchelly at 4:11 AM on September 17, 2021 [1 favorite]
posted by Mchelly at 4:11 AM on September 17, 2021 [1 favorite]
This could be a nice experience for you to do together, if she’s comfortable with that. I found pandemic-inspired home hair dye to be more difficult than I remembered. I would have appreciated my partner helping make sure the dye was fully saturated everywhere and in the back especially.
posted by areaperson at 6:00 AM on September 17, 2021
posted by areaperson at 6:00 AM on September 17, 2021
Someone above suggested henna and I just wanted to mention that henna and dyed hair can go very, very badly so proceed with much caution if that’s what your wife opts to try.
Truly I think the safest way out of this hair color conundrum is to see a professional. i know finances are a concern, but your wife only has one head of hair and that hair can only take so many coloring attempts before it becomes irreparably damaged and starts breaking off. Unlike we Mefites, a pro can assess the condition of her hair before making any recommendations.
posted by keep it under cover at 6:53 AM on September 17, 2021 [5 favorites]
Truly I think the safest way out of this hair color conundrum is to see a professional. i know finances are a concern, but your wife only has one head of hair and that hair can only take so many coloring attempts before it becomes irreparably damaged and starts breaking off. Unlike we Mefites, a pro can assess the condition of her hair before making any recommendations.
posted by keep it under cover at 6:53 AM on September 17, 2021 [5 favorites]
At this point you have probably already spent a decent amount of time and money on box dye, and doing it again is throwing more good money after bad. Your wife has gotten herself into a predicament that needs a professional to solve, if it's even solvable. Once this is sorted, I'd recommend if she wants to do her hair herself again, she talk to a professional and get a specific recommendation for an at-home product. She was already starting on hard mode and she was using a product that was doomed from the start not to give her the result she wanted.
I really feel for her, there's something about screwing up your hair that makes you feel particularly sad and hopeless. I bet there's something that a pro can do that, while not what she originally wanted, at least gets her away from needing a hat!
posted by fiercecupcake at 7:01 AM on September 17, 2021 [3 favorites]
I really feel for her, there's something about screwing up your hair that makes you feel particularly sad and hopeless. I bet there's something that a pro can do that, while not what she originally wanted, at least gets her away from needing a hat!
posted by fiercecupcake at 7:01 AM on September 17, 2021 [3 favorites]
If it helps her feel better, let her know that professionals do test strips for this reason all the time! My hair, for example, doesn't lift easily. It looks like it would because it's a medium ash brown and very fine (not coarse). But I once got highlights where I sat in a salon for hours with foils and everything and when she was done you could barely tell. (She didn't do a test strip unfortunately, but from then on she had a note in my file that my hair doesn't lift easily.)
I also follow some stylists on Instagram or see TikTok videos where they are willing to share the nitty gritty details, and if you do that for a while you'll see how challenging going from brown to the right shade of blonde (or getting greys to take color the way you want) can be even for them. Everyone's hair is slightly different, and when you are talking about already processed hair (+mixed with virgin roots!) that adds yet another layer of complexity.
I really feel for your wife, this can be so demoralizing to hate your hair, further so when you think it's your fault. If at all possible I think the advice to go to a professional colorist is best, but if not call the customer service lines for the products she used and see what they say. She may have to go back to brown for a while to let the damaged hair grow out.
posted by misskaz at 7:17 AM on September 17, 2021
I also follow some stylists on Instagram or see TikTok videos where they are willing to share the nitty gritty details, and if you do that for a while you'll see how challenging going from brown to the right shade of blonde (or getting greys to take color the way you want) can be even for them. Everyone's hair is slightly different, and when you are talking about already processed hair (+mixed with virgin roots!) that adds yet another layer of complexity.
I really feel for your wife, this can be so demoralizing to hate your hair, further so when you think it's your fault. If at all possible I think the advice to go to a professional colorist is best, but if not call the customer service lines for the products she used and see what they say. She may have to go back to brown for a while to let the damaged hair grow out.
posted by misskaz at 7:17 AM on September 17, 2021
A teensy parallel to the topic: I hope she's been leaving generous time gaps between attempts, as box dyes are harsh on hair and layering them on one after another can damage the hair, which makes it more difficult to manage, as well as control the colour. If it's feeling like a different texture, try using Olaplex to repair the hairs. It helps!
posted by foxtongue at 9:55 AM on September 17, 2021
posted by foxtongue at 9:55 AM on September 17, 2021
This thread is closed to new comments.
I do not work for this company but I have used their custom colour and I've been happy. It costs about the same as the drug store stuff.
posted by If only I had a penguin... at 11:39 AM on September 16, 2021 [6 favorites]