Fun
June 19, 2021 11:29 AM Subscribe
What is the decibel level of "fun" in your personal experience?
To me, if it's fun, it's loud. If it's quiet, you're just more likely to be enjoying yourself. My partner disagrees. I'd like to learn more. What does "fun" mean to you, in terms of volume?
To me, if it's fun, it's loud. If it's quiet, you're just more likely to be enjoying yourself. My partner disagrees. I'd like to learn more. What does "fun" mean to you, in terms of volume?
I have a lot of fun reading silently, on my own, so it could be zero decibels and still fun. I agree with the previous question, why do "fun" and "by myself" have to be mutually exclusive?
I am an introvert, if that matters. At the risk of overgeneralizing, I think extroverts may be more likely to correlate outward expressions of "fun" (like volume/decibels) to how people are feeling inside.
Let me put it this way: I don't feel like I have to perform or demonstrate that I am having fun, to actually have fun :) and I can absolutely be loud with a select group of friends, but it is not the only way to have fun, IMO!
I am also quite sensitive to noise/sound levels so I can actually have a lot less fun and maybe even leave if the group itself is "too noisy" or boisterous for me. I get overstimulated, I guess?
posted by tinydancer at 11:41 AM on June 19, 2021 [15 favorites]
I am an introvert, if that matters. At the risk of overgeneralizing, I think extroverts may be more likely to correlate outward expressions of "fun" (like volume/decibels) to how people are feeling inside.
Let me put it this way: I don't feel like I have to perform or demonstrate that I am having fun, to actually have fun :) and I can absolutely be loud with a select group of friends, but it is not the only way to have fun, IMO!
I am also quite sensitive to noise/sound levels so I can actually have a lot less fun and maybe even leave if the group itself is "too noisy" or boisterous for me. I get overstimulated, I guess?
posted by tinydancer at 11:41 AM on June 19, 2021 [15 favorites]
Another "fun and decibel level are not at all correlated" vote for me. In fact, noisy situations can be pretty annoying to me depending the situation (trying to have a conversation with friends in too noisy of a restaurant).
I consider a good drunken loudass bar with friends "fun", but also consider a quiet evening playing video games with my cat chillin next to me just as "fun".
posted by blueberrypuffin at 11:45 AM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
I consider a good drunken loudass bar with friends "fun", but also consider a quiet evening playing video games with my cat chillin next to me just as "fun".
posted by blueberrypuffin at 11:45 AM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
I’m in camp “there is no correlation, in my lived experience.” The most fun I’ve ever had was dead silent except for the wind (flying an old sailplane in a thermal with a hawk), with some experiences on sailboats in the running too. I’ve also had fun with things that have big loud engines, fun playing party games with friends, and fun flirting with my wife. The most miserable experiences I’ve had have been raucous shows with absolutely shit parking and huge crowds, so I might argue there’s an inverse relationship for me personally!
posted by Alterscape at 11:52 AM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
posted by Alterscape at 11:52 AM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
Yeah literally no correlation, except possibly an inverse one? (I find very loud to be extremely unpleasant). I also don't understand the distinction between "fun" and "enjoying yourself"?
posted by brainmouse at 11:55 AM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
posted by brainmouse at 11:55 AM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
Response by poster: Thanks all. Your questions helped me clarify the question, and I thought to look it up in the dictionary. I think this is my answer, I think of "fun" defined as having an element of boisterousness.
Fun
1 : what provides amusement or enjoyment
specifically : playful often boisterous action or speech
Enjoy
to have a good time
posted by aniola at 11:56 AM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
Fun
1 : what provides amusement or enjoyment
specifically : playful often boisterous action or speech
Enjoy
to have a good time
posted by aniola at 11:56 AM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
I sensory overload really fast and loud is my definition of hell and the opposite of fun, specially if it's music. I like music and life around me, don't get me wrong, but I have the most fun, when the noise is at levels you can still talk to the person next to you without yelling.
posted by wwax at 11:57 AM on June 19, 2021 [5 favorites]
posted by wwax at 11:57 AM on June 19, 2021 [5 favorites]
I can't help but notice that the very definition you cited does not say that "fun" always includes boisterousness:
"1. What provides amusement or enjoyment."
And "enjoy", as you have cited, simply means "to have a good time".
Now, this may just mean that for you there's gotta be a rollicking loud element for you to really get into it. But for others, that's not a requirement. That doesn't mean that such-and-such a thing isn't fun, or that so-and-so isn't having fun. All it means is that you and so-and-so like to do different things.
I'm curious as to the root of this particular discussion. Your partner disagrees with you about whether "fun" needs to be loud. Is this a friendly debate you guys are having, or is this more of a thing where you're having disagreements because you think the things your partner likes to do are boring as heck and they think that the things you like to do are obnoxious?
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 12:00 PM on June 19, 2021 [20 favorites]
"1. What provides amusement or enjoyment."
And "enjoy", as you have cited, simply means "to have a good time".
Now, this may just mean that for you there's gotta be a rollicking loud element for you to really get into it. But for others, that's not a requirement. That doesn't mean that such-and-such a thing isn't fun, or that so-and-so isn't having fun. All it means is that you and so-and-so like to do different things.
I'm curious as to the root of this particular discussion. Your partner disagrees with you about whether "fun" needs to be loud. Is this a friendly debate you guys are having, or is this more of a thing where you're having disagreements because you think the things your partner likes to do are boring as heck and they think that the things you like to do are obnoxious?
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 12:00 PM on June 19, 2021 [20 favorites]
Count be down as another person who finds this question kinda bizarre, if interesting. Of course, fun can be loud - I have often had fun at loud parties, house shows, dive bars, music venues, etc. But I've also had fun hiking silently in mountains, canoeing, or just catching up with a friend sitting in a park/their quiet apartment (often with boisterous speech/laughter).
Though I somewhat disagree that fun has to be boisterous. Whitewater kayaking for me is pure fun, but the only boisterous thing is the water (can water be boisterous?). I'd say for me fun is more closely coupled with joy than volume.
posted by coffeecat at 12:07 PM on June 19, 2021 [4 favorites]
Though I somewhat disagree that fun has to be boisterous. Whitewater kayaking for me is pure fun, but the only boisterous thing is the water (can water be boisterous?). I'd say for me fun is more closely coupled with joy than volume.
posted by coffeecat at 12:07 PM on June 19, 2021 [4 favorites]
The fun/enjoyment distinction is lost on me as well, but at a knee jerk response level, fun and loud feel either unrelated or negatively related to me. I absolutely do not find fun to involve boisterousness or volume.
posted by Stacey at 12:14 PM on June 19, 2021 [5 favorites]
posted by Stacey at 12:14 PM on June 19, 2021 [5 favorites]
Another data point here that fun can be at any decibel level for me, and agreeing with coffeecat that joy is more of a factor. I've had as much fun and joy watching my cats chase a wand toy as I have at karaoke; it's more intensity of feeling than volume.
posted by Recliner of Rage at 12:17 PM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
posted by Recliner of Rage at 12:17 PM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
While I also disagree with your question on a fundamental level, I also understand it, especially if I emphasize the “play” definition of fun.
Starting from there, let’s think about fun in the environment of an outdoor playground. For many kids, the environment alone would be enough for them to have fun, and it would be fairly quiet, except for whatever laughing/yelling the one kid does on their own. An outside observer would call that play “fun”, even if there was no other noise present. If there were 6-10 kids at the same playground, it would be much louder, and would look “more fun” from an outside perspective. The noise would make the playfulness more infectious/contagious, but that doesn’t mean there was no fun with just one kid.
Tldr, the decibel level aids in spreading the atmosphere of “fun” from person to person, but is not an intrinsic requirement for the individual experience of “fun”
posted by itesser at 12:24 PM on June 19, 2021 [7 favorites]
Starting from there, let’s think about fun in the environment of an outdoor playground. For many kids, the environment alone would be enough for them to have fun, and it would be fairly quiet, except for whatever laughing/yelling the one kid does on their own. An outside observer would call that play “fun”, even if there was no other noise present. If there were 6-10 kids at the same playground, it would be much louder, and would look “more fun” from an outside perspective. The noise would make the playfulness more infectious/contagious, but that doesn’t mean there was no fun with just one kid.
Tldr, the decibel level aids in spreading the atmosphere of “fun” from person to person, but is not an intrinsic requirement for the individual experience of “fun”
posted by itesser at 12:24 PM on June 19, 2021 [7 favorites]
I actually do get where you are coming from. Fun, for me, includes an element of excitement. Reading a book is very enjoyable, but not "fun". A walk in the countryside with my husband is lovely, but I wouldn't call it fun. But going to the zoo with him IS fun. And I do tend to get louder when I'm enthusiastic. So I guess I somewhat share your definition! But I wouldn't necessarily expect other people to.
posted by stillnocturnal at 12:25 PM on June 19, 2021 [6 favorites]
posted by stillnocturnal at 12:25 PM on June 19, 2021 [6 favorites]
Yeah, those definitions do not convince me. “Fun” can include boisterous speech but isn’t automatically “not fun” if it doesn’t. I absolutely feel playful and excited when reading some things or pursuing some non-noisy activities.
I guess the fact that people exist who don’t believe you can have fun without being noisy explains why I hear so many forced, insincere-sounding screams at modern horror movies.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 12:44 PM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
I guess the fact that people exist who don’t believe you can have fun without being noisy explains why I hear so many forced, insincere-sounding screams at modern horror movies.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 12:44 PM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
To add on to stillnocturnal, despite what I wrote upthread, I agree that fun is different than enjoyable, but for me it doesn't need to be exciting (or loud) so much as relatively special. Activities I consider special: hanging out with a friend, hiking, live music, art museum, restaurants - in other words, it doesn't need to be a rare activity, but generally not something I do every day. Reading a book with a cat on my lap, doing a puzzle with my partner - these are enjoyable, but I wouldn't call them fun. (Though playing with my cat is a daily bit of fun, so counterexamples exist)
posted by coffeecat at 1:00 PM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
posted by coffeecat at 1:00 PM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
I run an escape room - I sit in the control room and watch people play the game on cameras and listen to them on headphones (so I can give them hints and/or tell them not to climb on things). There's a huge variety in how expressive or loud people while they're in there, but by players' reports of their own experience, loudness doesn't really correlate that strongly to how much fun they said they had. And some of our most positive reviews are from people who were very quiet during the game.
So I think it's pretty incorrect to say that in general people who hoot and holler have more fun than people who don't. Though when someone wears their fun on their sleeve, that can be more fun to watch or be around!
posted by aubilenon at 1:01 PM on June 19, 2021 [7 favorites]
So I think it's pretty incorrect to say that in general people who hoot and holler have more fun than people who don't. Though when someone wears their fun on their sleeve, that can be more fun to watch or be around!
posted by aubilenon at 1:01 PM on June 19, 2021 [7 favorites]
But if I'm "having a bit of fun" then I'm more likely to be in West London with my droogs razdrezzing some poor chelloveck. But that does not imply a gromky party, but it might imply classical music.
See also what Dwarf Fortess has to say about it: Losing is Fun.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 1:02 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
See also what Dwarf Fortess has to say about it: Losing is Fun.
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 1:02 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: Correction: it's not even really a debate. It's more that I am trying to get lots of data points on how people personally define the range of the volume level (where applicable) of fun (vs enjoy) for themselves.
posted by aniola at 1:35 PM on June 19, 2021
posted by aniola at 1:35 PM on June 19, 2021
If I am trying to read for personal enjoyment and the room I'm in is very loud, I'm not having fun.
If I'm trying to enjoy a movie and the volume is so quiet I can't hear it, I am not having fun.
Context!
posted by phunniemee at 1:38 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
If I'm trying to enjoy a movie and the volume is so quiet I can't hear it, I am not having fun.
Context!
posted by phunniemee at 1:38 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
Based on my life while living in shitty apartments, I can have plenty of quiet fun.
Based on overhearing my neighbors lives in those same apartments, other people cannot.
posted by Pretty Good Talker at 1:44 PM on June 19, 2021 [12 favorites]
Based on overhearing my neighbors lives in those same apartments, other people cannot.
posted by Pretty Good Talker at 1:44 PM on June 19, 2021 [12 favorites]
I have never equated fun with noise. Reading the other responses here makes me realize that I wouldn't necessarily use the word "fun" to describe everything I enjoy. I probably wouldn't describe reading as fun, even though I love reading. What makes something fun? Thinking about the things that feel fun to me, it seems like an element of challenge, something that makes it a bit like a game, may be important in making something fun. Skating and skiing are fun and part of what makes them fun is working on getting better. I like hiking, but just walking on a trail, while enjoyable, doesn't exactly seem fun. If I'm looking for birds or wild berries, that can shift it into fun territory. Sudoku is fun. Arguing is fun. Shopping is fun if you're hunting for something you may or may not be able to find or browsing without knowing what you'll find, but buying nails and 2x4's or milk and eggs isn't fun. Trying a new recipe or trying to figure out the best recipe or best way to make something is fun. Making something I've made successfully a hundred times before, not so much.
Then there's another category of fun that seems more like what the OP has in mind. There are games like Pictionary where the point is not really to win but just to laugh at each other's drawings and be silly. It's fun to hang out with people you like, being silly and finding things to laugh about.
It seems like there should be some unifying element that applies to everything fun, but I'm not seeing one unless it's that fun things are like games (and you may or may not care about winning.)
posted by Redstart at 2:32 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
Then there's another category of fun that seems more like what the OP has in mind. There are games like Pictionary where the point is not really to win but just to laugh at each other's drawings and be silly. It's fun to hang out with people you like, being silly and finding things to laugh about.
It seems like there should be some unifying element that applies to everything fun, but I'm not seeing one unless it's that fun things are like games (and you may or may not care about winning.)
posted by Redstart at 2:32 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
Try cutting to the chase on pleasure: sometimes sex is super fun and (perhaps has to be) super quiet. Sometimes it is really fun and (perhaps has to be) rather loud.
I think volume/decibel level is often a proxy for intensity of experience, and "I had fun!" often connotes a bit more intensity of feeling than "I enjoyed that".
posted by SaltySalticid at 2:36 PM on June 19, 2021
I think volume/decibel level is often a proxy for intensity of experience, and "I had fun!" often connotes a bit more intensity of feeling than "I enjoyed that".
posted by SaltySalticid at 2:36 PM on June 19, 2021
In Miami I learned there is no distinction between fun and enjoyment. They are both high-decibel. If there isn’t a DJ present or some other source of music, then you’re probably not having fun nor enjoying yourself very much. The following examples are all real:
Saturday morning at the farmers market: DJ
perusing the Miami Book Fair: DJ
spending a day at the beach: bluetooth speakers (9 within a 50-foot radius)
shopping at the mall: DJ
mountain biking on Virginia Key: bluetooth speakers
kayaking through the mangrove forest of Oleta State Park: bluetooth speakers
playing dominoes at the senior center: bluetooth speakers
buying a SIM card at the T-Mobile shop: DJ
posted by theory at 2:52 PM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
Saturday morning at the farmers market: DJ
perusing the Miami Book Fair: DJ
spending a day at the beach: bluetooth speakers (9 within a 50-foot radius)
shopping at the mall: DJ
mountain biking on Virginia Key: bluetooth speakers
kayaking through the mangrove forest of Oleta State Park: bluetooth speakers
playing dominoes at the senior center: bluetooth speakers
buying a SIM card at the T-Mobile shop: DJ
posted by theory at 2:52 PM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
I am generally not a huge fan of noise, so much that it prevents me having fun sometimes.
posted by warriorqueen at 2:56 PM on June 19, 2021 [5 favorites]
posted by warriorqueen at 2:56 PM on June 19, 2021 [5 favorites]
For me, random noise (like the loud chatter in a crowded sports bar) sets my teeth on edge. Focused noise (like fireworks or a loud video game) doesn't bother me.
posted by SPrintF at 3:10 PM on June 19, 2021
posted by SPrintF at 3:10 PM on June 19, 2021
I generally express how much fun I’m having by getting louder and happier. Whooping it up and smiling and laughing and dancing and stuff. So yes, increased volume or larger body movements is how I express fun.
posted by gt2 at 3:14 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
posted by gt2 at 3:14 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
I can have loud fun and quiet fun. The noise level has very little to do with the fun quotient.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 3:30 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 3:30 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
I'm also not even sure that "noise level" is the best yardstick for what I think you're getting at. Maybe..."activity"? Like, you want to be doing something physical instead of doing something like knitting or reading or birdwatching or something.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 3:32 PM on June 19, 2021
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 3:32 PM on June 19, 2021
I for one am with you. I love reading but if I spent an afternoon reading and someone asked how my day was, I wouldn’t tell them fun. I would say great or relaxing or enjoyable or lovely, but the word fun wouldn’t come to mind.
Like others here though, I don’t always like loud busy boisterous places - so those can be miserable to me! But “fun” probably includes being with friends and/or doing something active/exhilarating.
posted by sillysally at 3:32 PM on June 19, 2021
Like others here though, I don’t always like loud busy boisterous places - so those can be miserable to me! But “fun” probably includes being with friends and/or doing something active/exhilarating.
posted by sillysally at 3:32 PM on June 19, 2021
In a group, loud and boisterous, imo, are NOT fun... they're obnoxious and something I want to escape.
I can have a great deal of "fun" during a relatively quiet experience... doing something sneaky and mischievous, especially when it's teasing someone, I find to be quite fun - especially when it's me and another person, doing it to a third. If I was asked what I was doing, I'd totally answer "having fun" with a grin... and chances were, it was all very quiet or I wouldn't have been getting away with it!
posted by stormyteal at 3:59 PM on June 19, 2021
I can have a great deal of "fun" during a relatively quiet experience... doing something sneaky and mischievous, especially when it's teasing someone, I find to be quite fun - especially when it's me and another person, doing it to a third. If I was asked what I was doing, I'd totally answer "having fun" with a grin... and chances were, it was all very quiet or I wouldn't have been getting away with it!
posted by stormyteal at 3:59 PM on June 19, 2021
I don’t equate noise with fun. I don’t normally think of reading, which I love, as fun, though I might characterize a light, not very challenging, book as a fun read. But I do call my nature walks fun. I kept seeing turtles a few weeks ago, and I said that was fun. Turtles are quiet.
posted by FencingGal at 4:00 PM on June 19, 2021 [5 favorites]
posted by FencingGal at 4:00 PM on June 19, 2021 [5 favorites]
From my home office window I can see the backyards of several houses across the creek, a few of which have kids who look to range in age from about 4-8. They scream constantly while playing. It made me think back when I was that age, playing with a group of friends, and how sometimes a grown-up would stick their head out the back door and tell us to stop screaming, and how things just didn't seem to be as much fun if you couldn't scream.
As an adult, I don't find it necessary to scream or be loud any more in order to have fun. Too much loudness or boisterousness can have the opposite effect on me. When I can't hear conversations well in a crowded room, I tend to shut down. When others are laughing raucously I often feel left out, as I may not fully understand the joke or feel comfortably part of the group. Loud movies are sensory hell; the same with loud music, which also makes me feel isolated from conversation. I often feel weird at concerts and music performances, because while I may be having a perfectly fun time sitting there listening to the music, others are clapping and dancing and shrieking their enjoyment, and I've had people say things to me before like "C'mon, clap!" or "Why aren't you dancing?!" like I'm a big old wet blanket on their good time. So I wind up feeling very self-conscious, when I'm just sitting there minding my own business not bothering anyone.
Even though I don't tend to enjoy noise or crowds or pursue boisterous activities so much, I still have fun. An example would be when my husband and I play a board game together. We don't scream or talk loudly, we talk a bit of trash and laugh at a normal volume, and I would definitely call it fun rather than just pleasant. My cats' antics are fun; comedy shows are fun; a day at the zoo is fun. I guess for me fun would be defined by whether I laughed and/or felt exhilarated, but not necessarily how loudly or boisterously I expressed it.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 4:39 PM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
As an adult, I don't find it necessary to scream or be loud any more in order to have fun. Too much loudness or boisterousness can have the opposite effect on me. When I can't hear conversations well in a crowded room, I tend to shut down. When others are laughing raucously I often feel left out, as I may not fully understand the joke or feel comfortably part of the group. Loud movies are sensory hell; the same with loud music, which also makes me feel isolated from conversation. I often feel weird at concerts and music performances, because while I may be having a perfectly fun time sitting there listening to the music, others are clapping and dancing and shrieking their enjoyment, and I've had people say things to me before like "C'mon, clap!" or "Why aren't you dancing?!" like I'm a big old wet blanket on their good time. So I wind up feeling very self-conscious, when I'm just sitting there minding my own business not bothering anyone.
Even though I don't tend to enjoy noise or crowds or pursue boisterous activities so much, I still have fun. An example would be when my husband and I play a board game together. We don't scream or talk loudly, we talk a bit of trash and laugh at a normal volume, and I would definitely call it fun rather than just pleasant. My cats' antics are fun; comedy shows are fun; a day at the zoo is fun. I guess for me fun would be defined by whether I laughed and/or felt exhilarated, but not necessarily how loudly or boisterously I expressed it.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 4:39 PM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
If we're talking about concerts, then I think it's something like:
(120 dB - your_age_in_years + blood_alcohol_level*100)
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 4:47 PM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
(120 dB - your_age_in_years + blood_alcohol_level*100)
posted by RobotVoodooPower at 4:47 PM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
When we were kids, we only screamed if we got hurt or if we wanted to call to someone on the other side of the yard. We didn't just exercise our lungs for the heck of it.
posted by The Underpants Monster at 4:48 PM on June 19, 2021
posted by The Underpants Monster at 4:48 PM on June 19, 2021
Very much age dependent. Young people=noisy. Old people, not so much.
I remember, in my teens and 20s, when good music or my song came on the radio, and I'd say "Turn it up!" When I got to my 40s, I began to realize that was a little annoying. Now that I'm in my 60s I want all you to just STFU so I can read in peace.
posted by Rash at 4:58 PM on June 19, 2021 [4 favorites]
I remember, in my teens and 20s, when good music or my song came on the radio, and I'd say "Turn it up!" When I got to my 40s, I began to realize that was a little annoying. Now that I'm in my 60s I want all you to just STFU so I can read in peace.
posted by Rash at 4:58 PM on June 19, 2021 [4 favorites]
I was just thinking about this myself recently! To me, fun is something that usually involves laughter, excitement, amusement, being wow'ed, or some other physical feeling, while enjoying myself is having a nice time, smiling at things or people. Amusement parks, bike rides, playing a competitive game, laughing with friends or at comedy, learning to do something new that's physically, mentally, or artistically challenging is fun to me. Going to the zoo or a botanical garden is somewhere between fun and enjoying myself. Reading a book, watching my toddler play at the same playground every day, a perfectly nice but every-day lunch with a friend or a family brunch is "enjoying myself."
posted by never.was.and.never.will.be. at 5:12 PM on June 19, 2021
posted by never.was.and.never.will.be. at 5:12 PM on June 19, 2021
I don't think fun has a volume level. There is quiet fun, loud fun, and fun volumes in between. I can see a difference between activities I'd describe as "fun" and ones I'd describe as "enjoyable" and either of those can be loud or not.
posted by wondermouse at 5:38 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
posted by wondermouse at 5:38 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
86db give or take 20db.
posted by AugustWest at 5:53 PM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
posted by AugustWest at 5:53 PM on June 19, 2021 [2 favorites]
I don't think I've ever been boisterous. I can't think of any positive connotation of the word.
I've had fun in silence, and I've had fun at ear-bleeding volumes (see: Jah Wobble & The Invaders Of The Heart, Renfew Ferry, sometime mid 90s). There isn't much correlation
posted by scruss at 6:06 PM on June 19, 2021
I've had fun in silence, and I've had fun at ear-bleeding volumes (see: Jah Wobble & The Invaders Of The Heart, Renfew Ferry, sometime mid 90s). There isn't much correlation
posted by scruss at 6:06 PM on June 19, 2021
This has been echoes of the bagel/croissant question earlier this week.
Noise, to me, has little bearing on fun either way, except that at a certain noise level I am No Longer Having Fun (because I find it overwhelming). Tonight I had a boatload of fun hanging out with friends, and the loudest we got was eight people laughing together plus some background music.
Skipping and singing with my nephew last weekend? Fun, probably not loud.
Dancing and yell-singing as I vacuumed today? Fun, definitely loud.
Now that I’ve thought a little more about it, I think sometimes loud can feel like fun, or cue/prompt fun, without actually being fun at all.
posted by punchtothehead at 8:00 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
Noise, to me, has little bearing on fun either way, except that at a certain noise level I am No Longer Having Fun (because I find it overwhelming). Tonight I had a boatload of fun hanging out with friends, and the loudest we got was eight people laughing together plus some background music.
Skipping and singing with my nephew last weekend? Fun, probably not loud.
Dancing and yell-singing as I vacuumed today? Fun, definitely loud.
Now that I’ve thought a little more about it, I think sometimes loud can feel like fun, or cue/prompt fun, without actually being fun at all.
posted by punchtothehead at 8:00 PM on June 19, 2021 [1 favorite]
It really never occured to me to draw a connection between fun and noise, but I could see an argument, that fun, in contrast to simple contentment, has to contain some element of exuberance. But again to me, exuberant = / = necessarily loud. There are people who can be quietly beaming with joy, perfectly exuberant, not much noise. High energy doesn't have to be high volume.
posted by sohalt at 9:57 PM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
posted by sohalt at 9:57 PM on June 19, 2021 [3 favorites]
For me, fun is inversely correlated with high volumes. If some activity is too noisy I won't enjoy it and will probably leave - if there was a DJ at the farmer's market I'd probably go home. The things I do for fun are all pretty quiet, like exploring in the woods or building cool computer stuff or playing kickabout in the park.
posted by quacks like a duck at 1:32 AM on June 20, 2021
posted by quacks like a duck at 1:32 AM on June 20, 2021
For me, loud activities can sometimes be fun, but they're very likely to be draining regardless of the amount of fun I'm having. But I wouldn't say that they're always fun, or that quieter activities can't also be fun. Watching a movie or playing video/board/card games with a small group of friends or online is usually a lot more fun to me than a party with loud music and drinking.
This feels like a question that's based in the classic introvert/extrovert divide. The thing to take to heart is that fun can be different for different people and that is fine and expected. People have their preferences and fun doesn't imply any sort of level of activity or volume. Debating semantics with someone that finds your kind of fun different from theirs is more likely to just alienate them than convince them.
posted by Aleyn at 1:44 AM on June 20, 2021 [1 favorite]
This feels like a question that's based in the classic introvert/extrovert divide. The thing to take to heart is that fun can be different for different people and that is fine and expected. People have their preferences and fun doesn't imply any sort of level of activity or volume. Debating semantics with someone that finds your kind of fun different from theirs is more likely to just alienate them than convince them.
posted by Aleyn at 1:44 AM on June 20, 2021 [1 favorite]
I've had fun dancing my heart out to live music at volumes that left me with ringing ears for days, and I've had fun completing a tough Sudoku in complete silence. Both of these kinds of fun involve enjoying an activity as opposed to enjoying myself.
Even by your dictionary definition, fun can be, but doesn't have to be, boisterous.
posted by flabdablet at 5:54 AM on June 20, 2021 [2 favorites]
Even by your dictionary definition, fun can be, but doesn't have to be, boisterous.
posted by flabdablet at 5:54 AM on June 20, 2021 [2 favorites]
If it’s too loud it hurts my ears and gives me anxiety and stresses out my nervous system and it becomes impossible for me to have fun/to be having fun. I’m not sure exactly where “too loud” is for me but I think my limit is lower than many people’s; I’ve hit my limit in stores playing their music louder than I’d like. I would say I had fun on a birding walk yesterday, which was mostly pretty quiet, and watching TV with a friend last night, which was also pretty quiet.
posted by needs more cowbell at 7:20 AM on June 20, 2021
posted by needs more cowbell at 7:20 AM on June 20, 2021
I definitely think a lot of people associate a certain decibel level with excitement, which can pair with fun. IIRC, loud music and so on can actually stimulate the release of endorphins, and I suspect some people are more receptive to this than others. In Taiwan people talked about night markets and other crowded, high-energy. stimulating events as 熱鬧 rènao, which means something like "bustling with noise and excitement". Those environments are stressful for me, but appealing to a lot of people.
For me ,"fun" is a broad category that includes "lively fun" but also "chill fun". If I'm playing a silly party game with people, it's probably going to get loud, with laughter and friendly shouting. But drawing and digital painting is also fun for me, and that's a solo activity that's usually silent (or with some not-too-loud music). Sounds to me like you equate fun with lively fun, and your partner is like me and doesn't.
posted by wintersweet at 8:16 AM on June 20, 2021 [2 favorites]
For me ,"fun" is a broad category that includes "lively fun" but also "chill fun". If I'm playing a silly party game with people, it's probably going to get loud, with laughter and friendly shouting. But drawing and digital painting is also fun for me, and that's a solo activity that's usually silent (or with some not-too-loud music). Sounds to me like you equate fun with lively fun, and your partner is like me and doesn't.
posted by wintersweet at 8:16 AM on June 20, 2021 [2 favorites]
mr gaspode and I have a standing 10pm date to do the NYT crossword together, every day. We do it in silence, except for suggesting an answer. Most days, it's the most fun part of my day.
posted by gaspode at 9:32 AM on June 20, 2021
posted by gaspode at 9:32 AM on June 20, 2021
Loud noises suck. High introvert, low tolerance for other people intruding on my space and experience. Any time I've had fun in a noisy environment, I've almost always, if not 100% wished they turned down the volume of music or conversation. And there are many, many more times when I've shut down because of noise, crowds, feeling like the general volume is too much for the space. Or gotten out as quickly as possible. One of my favorite stories of terrible noise experiences was at a piano bar I visited for my ex, where I felt the mere existence of speakers was overkill, let alone at any sort of volume, and she's like 'you really can't sit there the whole time with earplugs and still be holding your ears the entire night...' and of course my reply was "Watch me, oh no wait, the grocery store nearby has magazines, so I can go there, have fun, bye." It did... Not go well.
In very small doses, I do enjoy raves (usually attending for free plus being paid) but I still think the volume can be dropped by 50% and I will never, ever get trapped in the middle of a crowd. I will have at least one exit route.
Even when it's a restaurant that went from 40 people to ten, I'm feeling inwardly disgusted with the remainder that's trying their level best to maintain the volume of noise at 40,
posted by Jacen at 11:30 AM on June 20, 2021
In very small doses, I do enjoy raves (usually attending for free plus being paid) but I still think the volume can be dropped by 50% and I will never, ever get trapped in the middle of a crowd. I will have at least one exit route.
Even when it's a restaurant that went from 40 people to ten, I'm feeling inwardly disgusted with the remainder that's trying their level best to maintain the volume of noise at 40,
posted by Jacen at 11:30 AM on June 20, 2021
To me, if it's fun, it's loud. If it's quiet, you're just more likely to be enjoying yourself.
In the US anyhow, the word "enjoyment" is often linked to the word "quiet" because of noise ordinances and rental properties where you have a right to "the quiet enjoyment" of your property which means in some places they can keep you from blasting music outside or having a barky dog that's outside 24/7. Obviously this varies a lot from place to place but it may be where one of the associations comes from. And then I think of "fun parks" which is another US term for "amusement parks" and they are loud af.
To me, personally, fun is something that is active--being out and about, moving, hiking, driving, dancing, singing--and enjoyment is something that is more passive or possibly more solo--reading, watching tv/movies, birdwatching, cooking, napping, listening to music. So fun isn't loud per se, but it has more potential to be loud and enjoyment has more potential to be quiet but isn't always quiet.
posted by jessamyn at 1:19 PM on June 20, 2021
In the US anyhow, the word "enjoyment" is often linked to the word "quiet" because of noise ordinances and rental properties where you have a right to "the quiet enjoyment" of your property which means in some places they can keep you from blasting music outside or having a barky dog that's outside 24/7. Obviously this varies a lot from place to place but it may be where one of the associations comes from. And then I think of "fun parks" which is another US term for "amusement parks" and they are loud af.
To me, personally, fun is something that is active--being out and about, moving, hiking, driving, dancing, singing--and enjoyment is something that is more passive or possibly more solo--reading, watching tv/movies, birdwatching, cooking, napping, listening to music. So fun isn't loud per se, but it has more potential to be loud and enjoyment has more potential to be quiet but isn't always quiet.
posted by jessamyn at 1:19 PM on June 20, 2021
I agree that context is important—and this may be about my age more than anything else—but I usually feel like I'm having the most fun at loud concerts, DJ sets and films like the Fast and Furious franchise, where in those contexts I am also not expected to talk to other people. As soon as my hearing is tasked with attenuating to another level in those contexts, I'm lost and frustrated. So going to the pub with my friends where we're seated at the last table and it's underneath the speaker blasting metal, ehhhh, I'm not having so much fun, but if we're just jumping around in a dark club listening to the same music? The best.
I would also agree with stillnocturnal, the vast majority of bookreading for me can't be classified as fun, no matter how enjoyable or silly the book is. I'm having a silent mind-to-mind experience with the author, and while they might make me laugh or spark wild ideas in me, its still just a one-way street. Fun for me equates with being with others, getting boisterous, having a laugh and enjoying the activity at hand. That could be chess or it could be going to a theatre, different contexts but same feelings. This is not to discount silent or quiet activities as useless, but they don't correlate to the word "fun" for me in nearly the same way. Sound is life!
posted by Ten Cold Hot Dogs at 3:30 AM on June 21, 2021 [1 favorite]
I would also agree with stillnocturnal, the vast majority of bookreading for me can't be classified as fun, no matter how enjoyable or silly the book is. I'm having a silent mind-to-mind experience with the author, and while they might make me laugh or spark wild ideas in me, its still just a one-way street. Fun for me equates with being with others, getting boisterous, having a laugh and enjoying the activity at hand. That could be chess or it could be going to a theatre, different contexts but same feelings. This is not to discount silent or quiet activities as useless, but they don't correlate to the word "fun" for me in nearly the same way. Sound is life!
posted by Ten Cold Hot Dogs at 3:30 AM on June 21, 2021 [1 favorite]
What an interesting question.
I'm another of the noise-sensitive people. A street fair is fun. A street fair with booming amplified music is not fun at all.
Something that provokes the thought or remark "This is fun!" from me is likely to be something that has actually provoked surprise and delight. Programming can be fun. Anything involving exploration or discovery is going to be fun for me, whether that's following a trail through a sculpture park, walking around an unfamiliar city or making my way through the levels of an engaging computer game. Anything exhilarating is also going to be fun. Roller-coasters, being up high, standing by a powerful waterfall, being out by the coast on a windy day, standing in a butterfly house surrounded by fluttering wings.
I don't think I'd call a normal countryside walk (the kind I take most mornings) "fun", which is interesting. I enjoy it tremendously, the beauty can almost bring me to tears, and if I find an unexpected bird or flower or whatever I'll be beside myself with excitement and joy, but "fun" just isn't the right word somehow. Same with reading, generally speaking, although some books really *are* fun, the ones that keep catching me by surprise and making me want to read out passages to people.
Noise level is a completely different axis. Too much noise can and will ruin an otherwise fun or enjoyable experience, and I have never (that I recall) felt the urge to shout or whoop or scream with enjoyment. I express happiness with a broad grin, with words, maybe by jumping up and down briefly or waving my arms emphatically, but not with volume.
posted by ManyLeggedCreature at 3:33 AM on June 21, 2021 [1 favorite]
I'm another of the noise-sensitive people. A street fair is fun. A street fair with booming amplified music is not fun at all.
Something that provokes the thought or remark "This is fun!" from me is likely to be something that has actually provoked surprise and delight. Programming can be fun. Anything involving exploration or discovery is going to be fun for me, whether that's following a trail through a sculpture park, walking around an unfamiliar city or making my way through the levels of an engaging computer game. Anything exhilarating is also going to be fun. Roller-coasters, being up high, standing by a powerful waterfall, being out by the coast on a windy day, standing in a butterfly house surrounded by fluttering wings.
I don't think I'd call a normal countryside walk (the kind I take most mornings) "fun", which is interesting. I enjoy it tremendously, the beauty can almost bring me to tears, and if I find an unexpected bird or flower or whatever I'll be beside myself with excitement and joy, but "fun" just isn't the right word somehow. Same with reading, generally speaking, although some books really *are* fun, the ones that keep catching me by surprise and making me want to read out passages to people.
Noise level is a completely different axis. Too much noise can and will ruin an otherwise fun or enjoyable experience, and I have never (that I recall) felt the urge to shout or whoop or scream with enjoyment. I express happiness with a broad grin, with words, maybe by jumping up and down briefly or waving my arms emphatically, but not with volume.
posted by ManyLeggedCreature at 3:33 AM on June 21, 2021 [1 favorite]
I think "fun" implies some level of frivolity in enjoyment, although it's not necessary. Casually playing video games to me is fun, but if I'm doing so in a more competitive way, it becomes simply enjoyable while adding a level of fulfillment, if that makes sense. The same applies to games where you don't keep score or aren't that invested in winning, swimming, some outdoor activities. To me, a long hike wouldn't be fun per se, but it'd be less the volume level than the fact it's a way to get some exercise while taking in the sights.
On the flip side of things, I've found some types of music very fulfilling and enjoyable but less... fun. If I'm at an ear-blistering noise/drone show I often walk away feeling like my soul's been purified by a wall of sound but it might not feel fun, necessarily. On the other hand, just sitting in a park with some friends while having a casual conversation and soaking in the sun can feel fun, because to me it's very low-stakes and pleasurable.
posted by mikeh at 10:27 AM on June 21, 2021
On the flip side of things, I've found some types of music very fulfilling and enjoyable but less... fun. If I'm at an ear-blistering noise/drone show I often walk away feeling like my soul's been purified by a wall of sound but it might not feel fun, necessarily. On the other hand, just sitting in a park with some friends while having a casual conversation and soaking in the sun can feel fun, because to me it's very low-stakes and pleasurable.
posted by mikeh at 10:27 AM on June 21, 2021
another vote for fun being almost always negatively correlated with noise.
I can think of a couple of exceptions. An unexpectedly great night out dancing. Some high energy concerts (I need ear plugs to enjoy them; that's still plenty loud.) I was in a restaurant the other night where the music was just at the right volume to be lively and not intrusive -- and I noticed it, because it was so rare: restaurant music usually stresses me out with its volume, quality or both.
I can think of geometrically more times when my enjoyment was ruined by excessive noise than times when it was enhanced. Fun for me is good-energy hangouts with friends or loved ones, time outdoors in beautiful places, enjoyable experiences. Loud noise almost always makes me really unhappy, and often stressed to the point of needing to leave.
posted by fingersandtoes at 12:11 PM on June 21, 2021
I can think of a couple of exceptions. An unexpectedly great night out dancing. Some high energy concerts (I need ear plugs to enjoy them; that's still plenty loud.) I was in a restaurant the other night where the music was just at the right volume to be lively and not intrusive -- and I noticed it, because it was so rare: restaurant music usually stresses me out with its volume, quality or both.
I can think of geometrically more times when my enjoyment was ruined by excessive noise than times when it was enhanced. Fun for me is good-energy hangouts with friends or loved ones, time outdoors in beautiful places, enjoyable experiences. Loud noise almost always makes me really unhappy, and often stressed to the point of needing to leave.
posted by fingersandtoes at 12:11 PM on June 21, 2021
I think loud can be fun unless you’re in a situation where you want to actually talk to another person and understand what they’re saying. Then it just becomes frustrating as you have to keep asking, “What?” and “Can you say that again?”
Mood can also be a factor. If you’re out drinking with your friends and everybody’s down to be loud, then loud can be fine. But if you’re on a first date or want to have a deep, meaningful conversation with somebody, then no, loud can be difficult and awkward for the reason mentioned above.
Finally it also can depend on the person or people you’re with. Some people just have a hard time projecting, even when situation/volume level calls for it. Others may have a soft voice or foreign accent. All these things count against you in a loud room.
Ultimately I’m someone who prefers to be in places where you can have a conversation at normal volume. But I can think of times when I was in a loud place and didn’t mind it too much; and those were nearly all situations where I was with people i knew well, we didn’t mind being loud ourselves, and nobody was taking about anything particularly deep or meaningful.
posted by panama joe at 5:42 AM on June 27, 2021
Mood can also be a factor. If you’re out drinking with your friends and everybody’s down to be loud, then loud can be fine. But if you’re on a first date or want to have a deep, meaningful conversation with somebody, then no, loud can be difficult and awkward for the reason mentioned above.
Finally it also can depend on the person or people you’re with. Some people just have a hard time projecting, even when situation/volume level calls for it. Others may have a soft voice or foreign accent. All these things count against you in a loud room.
Ultimately I’m someone who prefers to be in places where you can have a conversation at normal volume. But I can think of times when I was in a loud place and didn’t mind it too much; and those were nearly all situations where I was with people i knew well, we didn’t mind being loud ourselves, and nobody was taking about anything particularly deep or meaningful.
posted by panama joe at 5:42 AM on June 27, 2021
« Older Should I try to get my rental deposit back? | Anyone know a good eye surgeon in Massachusetts?... Newer »
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by sagc at 11:34 AM on June 19, 2021 [23 favorites]