Have you experienced this and fixed it?
February 11, 2021 8:21 AM Subscribe
For years, I used a Hitachi Wand vibrator to orgasm. Sometimes I would use it so long it started hurting. So I finally got rid of it. But it's a year later and my clitoris still experiences pain when I masturbate sometimes now. Is this a physical problem or a Pavlovian response? Either way, how do I fix it?
I do not have STIs. I am in my late 30s if it matters. I will ask my doctor when the pandemic is over, but I'm asking you now.
I do not have STIs. I am in my late 30s if it matters. I will ask my doctor when the pandemic is over, but I'm asking you now.
How much pain? I feel like that matters a lot. (You can use the contact form at the bottom of the page to ask one of the moderators to add your answer if you want to.)
I've never been a regular Hitachi user, and I still sometimes have mild lingering pain just from pressing too hard or poking something the wrong way. It's an easy activity to get a bit carried away in, ignore your body's early pain signals, and get yourself a scratched up, bumped, or overstimulated. But again: mild and lingering at worst, rather than strong and lasting.
If it is mild, I find it helps to use wider touch on the whole area, rather than targeting my clit specifically — that's the thing that's made the biggest difference for me in terms of pain. But if it's stronger than that, honestly you should ignore us and listen to your doctor (and see if you can get a telemedicine appointment now rather than waiting for an in-person one).
posted by nebulawindphone at 8:53 AM on February 11, 2021 [1 favorite]
I've never been a regular Hitachi user, and I still sometimes have mild lingering pain just from pressing too hard or poking something the wrong way. It's an easy activity to get a bit carried away in, ignore your body's early pain signals, and get yourself a scratched up, bumped, or overstimulated. But again: mild and lingering at worst, rather than strong and lasting.
If it is mild, I find it helps to use wider touch on the whole area, rather than targeting my clit specifically — that's the thing that's made the biggest difference for me in terms of pain. But if it's stronger than that, honestly you should ignore us and listen to your doctor (and see if you can get a telemedicine appointment now rather than waiting for an in-person one).
posted by nebulawindphone at 8:53 AM on February 11, 2021 [1 favorite]
Could be a combination of a hormone change and being too rough. As you age and estrogen levels drop, the tissue down there becomes more delicate and prone to injury. This can be determined by a blood test and if your levels are on the low side, you can help things out with a vaginal tablet (inserted like a tampon). But regardless, if you're just being too rough on yourself, it might be time to figure out a different way to do things.
This feels like super TMI but I have a Hitachi that I use sparingly (e.g. if it takes more than 30 seconds to get off, I take a vacation until sensitivity comes back) and with a barrier (underwear or similar). But the key is to be gentle and not forceful. You might not notice an injury in the moment, but you sure will afterward/next time.
posted by Autumnheart at 9:05 AM on February 11, 2021
This feels like super TMI but I have a Hitachi that I use sparingly (e.g. if it takes more than 30 seconds to get off, I take a vacation until sensitivity comes back) and with a barrier (underwear or similar). But the key is to be gentle and not forceful. You might not notice an injury in the moment, but you sure will afterward/next time.
posted by Autumnheart at 9:05 AM on February 11, 2021
I experienced a nerve injury in my fingers from gripping something too tightly for an hour. It took just over a year to go back to normal. The pain and numbness were both intense and long-lasting and I was seriously afraid the hand wouldn't go back to normal.
There's also some evidence that some people can reduce pain through cbt and biofeedback techniques, so I think both of your hypotheses are viable.
But this is going to be another talk to your doctor question. And good luck finding a doctor who is interested in tracking down an actual issue with female sexual health. Sorry, I'm pessimistic with reason.
posted by liminal_shadows at 9:19 AM on February 11, 2021 [3 favorites]
There's also some evidence that some people can reduce pain through cbt and biofeedback techniques, so I think both of your hypotheses are viable.
But this is going to be another talk to your doctor question. And good luck finding a doctor who is interested in tracking down an actual issue with female sexual health. Sorry, I'm pessimistic with reason.
posted by liminal_shadows at 9:19 AM on February 11, 2021 [3 favorites]
is it because the Hitachi was a very strong vibration and you got used to that level of pressure, so now you're having to really press hard to get where you want to be? Any sensitive organ (and especially that one) is easy to hurt if you're not gentle with it.
(This paradox, that a too-strong stimulation hurts but a too-gentle one doesn't induce orgasm, is, I suspect, more widespread than is often discussed.)
posted by fingersandtoes at 10:36 AM on February 11, 2021 [2 favorites]
(This paradox, that a too-strong stimulation hurts but a too-gentle one doesn't induce orgasm, is, I suspect, more widespread than is often discussed.)
posted by fingersandtoes at 10:36 AM on February 11, 2021 [2 favorites]
That style is way too intense for me. There are some new (to me, anyway) varieties, so maybe shop more. I have a little pocket-size one that does just fine, but shopping would be fun. And use lube. Repeated for emphasis: Lube.
posted by theora55 at 12:07 PM on February 11, 2021
posted by theora55 at 12:07 PM on February 11, 2021
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posted by Young Kullervo at 8:37 AM on February 11, 2021