Will I pass this drug test in 2 days?

December 28, 2020 2:09 PM

I have to pee in a cup in 2 days for a drug screen, and I absolutely have to pass this test. What advice can you give for someone in my situation?

Until this Thanksgiving (the day before I found out about the upcoming drug screen) I was a daily cannabis user. I'd use my dry-herb vaporizer and/or an edible after work while I walk the dog to de-stress and chill out. This has been ongoing for years.

The day after Thanksgiving I was informed my employer would be requiring all employees to pass a "10 panel drug screen". I haven't consumed THC since then. If I take the test on the 30th, it will have been nearly 5 weeks of abstaining.

It's a urine test.

I've been running fairly regularly (6-8 miles at a time, 3-4 times a week) since then and trying to drink more water than usual. I've been taking these detox pills that a coworker also used (he tested "negative dilute" and has to re-test).

I'm EXTREMELY anxious about this because I've read for someone with extra fat (like me) and a slow metabolism (like me) and is a heavy user (like me) it can be detected in the urine stream for 45-90 days. Other sites I read say it leaves your system after 30, so I'm not sure what to trust.

I can possibly delay this test by a week, but probably not more than that. What's the likelihood I'm going to pass? I know there are home drug tests I can use but I don't think I'm going to have access to that, but I can try.

Is there anything else I should be doing or consuming to increase my chances of passing this test? It's possible that this test won't even screen for THC, but I can't really ask my employer if they're going to be testing for weed.

If you need to email me, you can reach me at [e-mail].

Thanks AskMe, you're my only hope.

posted by anonymous to Health & Fitness (15 answers total)

Would it worth paying for your own test out of pocket ahead of time to see where you’re at with regards to THC being in your system still?
posted by raccoon409 at 2:18 PM on December 28, 2020 [9 favorites]

A 10-panel drug test will absolutely test for marijuana, as well as synthetic cannabinoids. I think your chances of pissing clean are low if you have abstained for only five weeks. How badly do you need this job? Would you get immediately fired for failing the test? If you, say, got very sick with a debilitating and contagious illness on the day of the test and are unable to work or be in close contact with others for 4+ weeks, would you be able to survive financially and keep your job with a pause for that "recovery" time and give yourself more weeks to get it out of your system? Or someone you live with getting diagnosed with an illness of this sort, necessitating you quarantining for a period of time?
posted by juniperesque at 2:35 PM on December 28, 2020 [14 favorites]

I would highly recommend taking a home test to see if the upcoming test warrants this level of anxiety. Though the ten panel test may be more sensitive it’s a pretty good indicator of whether or not you’ll pass. That being said, depending on the state you live in, you may have access to synthetic urine. Not everyone will be comfortable with the use of that kind of product since it’s illegal but as a cannabis user you may be used to some level of circumventing the law anyway. I have, in the past, successfully used synthetic urine to pass ten panel tests when it was necessary to keep my job (now I live in a legal state and work in a job where testing isn’t required). IMO these kinds of drug tests unfairly discriminate against cannabis users since other, arguably more harmful drugs clear your system much quicker. I would never recommend this for tests required for probation or anything like that and do not condone the use of cannabis while on the job but i don’t think it’s your employer’s business if you unwind by smoking a joint after work when plenty of people do the same thing with alcohol and that has no repercussions...
posted by sparringnarwhal at 2:50 PM on December 28, 2020 [8 favorites]

You can get home tests at Dollar Tree.
posted by mermaidcafe at 2:58 PM on December 28, 2020 [1 favorite]

I emailed you.
posted by floam7 at 2:58 PM on December 28, 2020

Go to a drugstore and buy a home test. CVS, Rite-aid, Walgreens, etc all carry home pee testing kits. If you pass the home test you should be fine. If you don't pass, delay it for a week and try again.
posted by Arbac at 3:41 PM on December 28, 2020

There are some jobs, not sure of yours, that may give an option for rehab or substance abuse help in the event someone tests positive for something as an option to go through rather than just immediately firing you. Your personal use may not warrant that route under normal circumstances, but if your employer offers that as an escape route so to speak. I am not sure if this is your case and I have not had any personal experience, just something I thought you might be able to look into. I hope it works out for you.
posted by VyanSelei at 4:23 PM on December 28, 2020 [2 favorites]

Do not forget that a "negative dilute" is an indication of you trying to flush your system; not sure if that is enough for your circumstance to count as a negative or not, but in mine it's 99% as bad as a non-negative result for cause; more especially so if you know the test is coming. Depending on the time delay for a retest is helpful to you though...

I test using kits at work and get positive results up to two weeks after quoted "last use" - of course, they are hardly going to be accurate in quoting their usage on a surprise D&A though, are they.

What's your industry and why the test? (As in, what caused testing to be done?) The severity might help with judgement, but in any event, good luck should be on your side given such abstention.

Legality is the root cause of moral judgment here; if legal where you are, then cause for effect is the workplace issue and that should, with respect, be something your judgment must be sound in.

Just because you are in Holland doesn't allow for you to turn-up baked from the night before, and drive a school bus, you know?

You can ask them what they are screening for, and they (usually) legally have to inform you - and THC is an on-the-spot indication; so it shows, they have to send the sample for analysis, which then dives deeper, of course, across the spectrum of possible results.

As VyanSelei comments, this doesn't mean you are doomed if your employer cares about you, at all
posted by DrtyBlvd at 4:31 PM on December 28, 2020

Nthing the idea of visiting your local Dollar Tree to buy a few tests. If you can't pass and you can't delay, hopefully you've got a friend or family member of the same biological gender who can provide a clean sample with which to substitute. Nobody's going to be watching you for an employment screen, so as long as you get the temperature vaguely correct by storing it directly against skin in a warm place, it will be your little secret. Have someone pee in an appropriate container the night before, stash it in the fridge so it won't degrade, then give it time to re-warm. It will go cloudy in the fridge, but it will clear up when warmed. A few seconds in the microwave will do the trick, IME.

A 10 panel includes THC. You should be able to look it up on the testing house's website to be positive about what they are treating for if they are using one of the chains.

If you are borderline and have to use your own pee, make sure to collect mid-stream, not at the very beginning or end of your evacuation. And stop exercising now. All that's doing is releasing the shit in your fat cells into your bloodstream.

On preview, VyanSelei's comment reminds me that a addiction is a disability covered by federal law if you want to go that route. It's illegal to fire you if you do rehab/substance abuse counseling, so you should check your employee handbook if you work for a large company.

Also, if you aren't operating heavy machinery, it's not entirely unheard of for tests to be quietly ignored, but it you knew your boss that well you probably wouldn't be so anxious about it..
posted by wierdo at 4:36 PM on December 28, 2020 [1 favorite]

This isn't directly applicable to your question, but do you know that your employer cares if you test positive for weed? Is it legal in your state? If everybody is being tested, is the idea that your employer is willing to fire every single employee if they test positive for pot? That seems extreme for a first-ever test in the company (I'm assuming the first, since you've been a daily consumer for so long).
posted by rhizome at 6:07 PM on December 28, 2020

I can possibly delay this test by a week, but probably not more than that.

You don't mention the details of your work situation, but if it doesn't impact your livelihood to be quarantining due to exposure to someone who tested COVID+, right now that's a pretty common reason to be unexpectedly stuck at home for 10-14 days.
posted by deludingmyself at 7:07 PM on December 28, 2020 [5 favorites]

Baby food comes in pouches with a screw top; they are easy to clean and the top is pretty secure. But be super-careful, because tampering with a test is likely automatic dismissal. I'm sorry your employer made this stupid, harmful decision that includes weed.
posted by theora55 at 7:29 PM on December 28, 2020

deludingmyself's suggestion seems appropriate .. exposure to Covid means you have to quarantine
posted by anadem at 7:42 PM on December 28, 2020

Unless similar tests have been a regular feature of your job at this company, I would be very suspicious of their motives in requiring them now.

If they are looking to achieve a reduction in force without incurring liabilities for severance pay or increased unemployment insurance premiums, for example, they will want a certain minimum proportion of positive tests, and the testing company will have every incentive to give it to them.

So I would delay the test and tell the company you need the delay to arrange for your own personal test immediately after their test in order to protect yourself from false positives on their test, and also to have time to meet with an employment lawyer.
posted by jamjam at 8:11 PM on December 28, 2020 [3 favorites]

Nthing to stop running now and do not run a calorie deficit. Try to keep your fat cells intact. THC is stored in fat cells and if you’re burning fat, you’re releasing the sequestered THC into your body.
posted by quince at 1:09 AM on December 29, 2020 [2 favorites]