Getting married in the us - where?

March 25, 2018 4:08 AM

We are an overseas couple who are considering eloping to a US city. As we will be on holiday, time will be limited, so we want somewhere which is basically first come, first served. Any suggestions?

First choice was Boston. This has a three day waiting period between applying for a license and picking it up, which is fine, but then we would have to make an appointment to actually come in and get married, and chances are that wouldn't be possible before we have to fly home. DC wants a two week wait between applying in person and picking up a license. Philadelphia only opens their appointment book at the beginning of the month, so we'd never get a slot.

From looking online both NYC and Chicago do first come, first served weddings and have minimal waiting to get the license sorted, but I was wondering if there might be anywhere else we haven't considered. We don't want to book a celebrant or bring guesrs or organise a reception - we just want to turn up, get married, and then go and do something fun.

Oh - a US wedding is all legal for us at home, and neither of us drive if that makes a difference in terms of location. We would prefer somewhere around Boston/DC but any suggestions welcome! We don't want to go to Vegas...

posted by anonymous to Travel & Transportation (13 answers total)

Portland, Maine - it's a two-hour train trip from Boston, and you can get married the same day you get your license.

And it's a charming little city with lots of good food and drink. It's quite walkable, though you'd probably want to take a cab or rideshare to/from the train station to the center. Alternately, if you prefer the beach to a small city, you could go to any of the southern Maine beach towns.

We got married (not an elopement) in Portland last year and our officiant and photographer both seem to do a lot of elopements, and the people in line after us to get their marriage license were wearing wedding clothes and, I think, got married at City Hall.
posted by mskyle at 4:31 AM on March 25, 2018 [4 favorites]

Have you thought about a self-uniting marriage license? This is in PA, but there are other versions of this elsewhere in the US as well. You basically marry yourselves. You have to submit paperwork afterwards.
posted by carter at 4:34 AM on March 25, 2018

The second appointment in Boston, after the license, is only if you want to get married at City Hall I believe (um, but maybe you are fans of brutalist architecture?). But you can have the elopement performed lots of iconic Boston places, like the Public Garden or even one of the Harbor Islands, just a short, romantic ferry ride from downtown. And there are tons of places available through the Boston Parks and Rec department, from "baseball field" to "urban wild."

I'm a wedding celebrant/officiant in Cambridge, MA, and think Boston is totally doable. MeMail me if you want to coordinate (or check out the link in my profile). I'd be happy to officiate, and know of lots of places in the area to have a wonderful, personal ceremony.
posted by cocoagirl at 5:36 AM on March 25, 2018 [4 favorites]

If you really insist on Not Vegas, tradition demands Niagara Falls. You could do the license and ceremony either in the US or Canada, but the really "classic" NF hotel experience (ie sitting in a tub while looking at the falls) is from Ontario. You would probably fly into Toronto Pearson and there's enough in Tronna to keep you busy for a few days, or if you like architecture Buffalo is only a smidge past NF.
posted by GCU Sweet and Full of Grace at 5:40 AM on March 25, 2018 [3 favorites]

(Just a side note that might be helpful in planning your trip: The area "around Boston/DC" is a HUGE area. Looking at a map of the US might make them seem close, particularly if your intuitions about geographic scale are based on experience in Europe or really anywhere other than the handful of countries with a similar scale. Boston and DC are over 600km apart as the crow flies, 1.5 hours by plane or 10 hours by car or train. The northeast corridor that links them is comparable in size and population to England + Lowland Scotland, or the Paris metro area + the Benelux countries. You may already know this, but I've heard more than one story of visitors who had a trip thrown badly off-kilter when they discovered their little side trip from New York to DC was going to take 10 hours of round-trip travel time.)
posted by firechicago at 7:06 AM on March 25, 2018 [6 favorites]

Booking a celebrant/officiant may actually make your goal easier to accomplish. I know someone who used Pop! Wed Co. in DC and enjoyed it. It seemed like very much a "turn up, get married, and then go and do something fun" kind of experience.

The process of getting a marriage license in DC actually takes less than a day. You go to the courthouse, fill out an application, pay the fee, and they give you the license on the spot. The catch for your situation is that you need to provide the name of the officiant/celebrant when you apply for the license. If you don't have an officiant and want to get married at the courthouse, then that is what will take another few weeks to schedule. But if you use an officiant they often can take care of getting the license for you in advance.
posted by AndrewInDC at 8:59 AM on March 25, 2018

Mod note: This is a followup from the asker.

Thanks for answers so far!
- I know Boston and DC aren't that close - we are mostly interested in visiting either city and would be happy with somewhere travelable from either one. We have friends in both cities and wanted to visit them as well whilst on holiday.
- To keep things simple, I think we just want to get a license and then turn up and get married. We don't want the hassle/expense of booking and planning a separate venue. We won't have any guests, save some friends who might come along if they want.
- I don't know if self-insuring marriages are legal here, so to be on the safe side we want to do it 'traditionally'

posted by cortex (staff) at 9:15 AM on March 25, 2018

On update, Boston definitely does "turn up and get married" well. There are awesome, free, indoor and outdoor locations for short, sweet ceremonies and as long as you don't want any set-up (chairs, an arch, flowers installed, etc.) and are efficient about the timing, it's easy.
posted by cocoagirl at 9:58 AM on March 25, 2018

I got married at City Hall in Chicago last year, and I would recommend it! There is a 24 hour waiting period after picking up the marriage license (at the City Clerk), and when you go in to get married; and it's first come first served. We went on a Friday afternoon, and our photographer told us that was a good choice--I think there were two couples ahead of us, and she said that on the weekend, lines can be long. The judge we got was lovely and gave us a very sweet, brief ceremony; we were able to bring our own vows. One thing to know is that the office where marriages are performed is in the basement, so you go into the beautiful marble City Hall building, and then you go down an escalator into this dark space with brown carpet and a gurgling water cooler. We found it hilarious and enjoyed it! My understanding is that the space in NYC is much prettier. (We considered going to NYC at one point.)

One thing that might be an issue for you is that when we went the following week to pick up our marriage certificate from the City Clerk's office, we learned that it isn't available until 14 days after the marriage. So you might just want to confirm that it's possible to order marriage certificates online or by mail or something, if you aren't going to be able to pick one up in person two weeks later.

Feel free to memail me if you have any other questions about the process in Chicago. Congratulations!
posted by snorkmaiden at 11:27 AM on March 25, 2018

Are you positive that the waiting-period between applying and getting a license in DC is two weeks? My understanding is that the waiting period was abolished. Unfortunately, the official web site for the DC courts isn't working for me right now, but you should be able to get authoritative information here. A number of less official sources (like this and this) seem to corroborate my understanding, so I think this is worth double checking. I will note, in case you do go in this direction and have aesthetic sensitivities, that the DC courthouse is a bit dismal (in my opinion).
posted by reren at 8:05 PM on March 25, 2018

In Boston, you can get a waiver that allows you to marry on the same day. It's not necessarily super easy, but not the most complicated thing either. Some folks I know did this recently, they're also not local to Boston, it worked out fine. Took them a couple of hours of ferrying back and forth to a courthouse.

Alternatively, parts of New Hampshire are just an hour's drive from Boston, and you can easily get married same-day there.
posted by vasi at 8:19 AM on March 26, 2018

FYI, NYS has a 24 hour waiting period between license issuing and ability to do the ceremony. You will need to find a licensed official and a witness to sign your certificate. (Our wedding was literally the two of us, our officiant, our witness, & our photographer. It was perfect.)

So you can do the Niagara Falls trip, but you will need to schedule it around when you can complete and submit the marriage license application at the Town or City Clerk's Office in either NF or Buffalo. If you decide to do it at the Court House, they have weird hours of when they perform marriages, so be aware of scheduling.

More info can be found here.
posted by RhysPenbras at 11:48 AM on March 26, 2018

Colorado is a unique state in that they allow couples to marry themselves, sans witnesses & officiant. You go to the courthouse, apply for your marriage license, marry yourselves within the allotted 30 days and then return the license to the courthouse afterwards swearing that you did indeed marry one another. You do not have to be a Colorado resident to marry within the state and yes, the marriage is indeed legal and recognized in all other US states.

No bloodtests, no bullsh*t hoops or requirements or waiting, just a process that treats you like the adults you are.

We self-solemnized our wedding at 12,000', in the backyard of a cabin we rented on VRBO, looking out at the west side of Pike's Peak. FWIW there was no line or wait of any kind at the Teller County courthouse in Cripple Creek and it was an incredibly romantic building. It felt like we'd gone back in time.

If you're not US citizens living abroad (i.e. foreign nationals) be sure to call the county courthouse of your choosing ahead of time to make sure you bring all documents neccessary for your ceremony to be recognized in your home country.
posted by muirne81 at 2:29 PM on March 26, 2018