Canada Post stalker

January 30, 2018 6:28 AM

A dear friend is receiving anonymous, creepy, but not explicitly threatening mail via Canada Post, from someone who is quite clearly watching their movements in their neighbourhood. These messages range from critiquing my friend's family dynamic (walking behind instead of beside their partner for example) to harshly critiquing articles my friend has written for mainstream publications and websites. The notes are handwritten. A camera won't help, as they're coming through the mail. The police have not been helpful. What would you do? Are there any options here?
posted by lizifer to Human Relations (10 answers total)

Since the police aren't being useful, I would contact Canada Post. Does Canada Post have an inspector general type office? The US Postal Service's Office of the Inspector General is where I would go if this happened to me in the US.

I would try calling them and and escalating to a supervisor who can help. If that doesn't yield results, maybe DM them on Twitter or Facebook?

This sucks, and the fact that the police aren't helping makes it so much worse. I hope your friend stays safe.
posted by schroedingersgirl at 6:44 AM on January 30, 2018 [7 favorites]

Maybe contact the publications or websites and see if they've gotten any weird messages for your friend? It might help narrow down who it is.
posted by I'm Not Even Supposed To Be Here Today! at 6:51 AM on January 30, 2018 [1 favorite]

What would you do?

I would go back to the police and make them do their job.
posted by Julnyes at 8:43 AM on January 30, 2018 [19 favorites]

You might see if you have any kind of community policing liaison, since this does clearly seem to be coming from inside the neighborhood. (Do Canadians have NextDoor? That's how I know who mine is.)

A camera might very well help, wielded by a third party accompanying your friend around the neighborhood a few times. Maybe in low-key mode for several trips, staying back/across the street and just videoing and watching the windows and passersby, and then maybe some real obvious outings with camera and gorillapod in hand to send a message that resources are being deployed to find the creeper, so stop creeping.
posted by Lyn Never at 9:29 AM on January 30, 2018

Ok so the police are dropping the ball here. The term used in Canada for stalking is criminal harassment. I would suggest your friend go to Canada Post and tell them that they are being criminally harassed through the mail and ask them for help. I don't know specifically what they may suggest, but something like a post office box may be possible.

Here is a decent resource on stalking in Canada. Unfortunately the document is tailored particularly to women (and you didn't mention your friends gender, didn't want to appear to be misgendering your friend), but has some great advice and places to call. Maybe pass it on to see if it would be helpful for them?
posted by snowysoul at 11:56 AM on January 30, 2018 [5 favorites]

Could mobile phone tracking be of use? I haven't played around with it myself, but that article mentions the same sort of software used to record and map nearby WiFi access points being used to track phones.

So, if the stalker has a mobile phone, then if your friend were to monitor all of the unique ID numbers broadcast by phones appearing around their location while they're out and about in the neighbourhood for a period of time, perhaps correlating that list with future stalker messages indicating when the spying is occurring would show one or more IDs in common on those occasions and help narrow down the list of candidates. If you focus on one particular ID, I've seen Youtube videos where a radar-like display is used to track down the corresponding phone. (Though obviously, physically confronting the stalker might be a bad idea.)
posted by XMLicious at 12:51 PM on January 30, 2018

I wonder if your friend could maybe contact the nearby community league and ask them for help and advice? Basically, I'm thinking that if the stalker lives in the neighbourhood then this is perhaps not their first victim and they may be a well-known busy-body in the community. Depending on the creepiness of the messages and the bravery of your friend, maybe posting a message on the community mailbox (if there is one) asking for tips could help? Yeah, the stalker will see it but maybe someone helpful will too? I just can't help but think others in the community know who this wierdo is. But, this last bit of advice presumes that this stalker is basically harmless and cowardly. So if there's any reason to think he/she is dangerous, it's probably not a good idea.
posted by kitcat at 1:52 PM on January 30, 2018

Stalking is stalking, even if, SO FAR, the contact is solely through the mail. It indicates that they know where their victim lives.

Since law enforcement have been yet to be helpful, I'd suggest:
- Keep all received materials and log what was received. Also log anything else that occurs that seems off.
- Get cameras anyways. Just because there hasn't been anything obvious yet, doesn't mean there won't. The stalker has their address, remember? And things may have happened that the victim has not yet noticed.
- Carefully discuss this with chosen neighbors and friends. Just in case the stalker happens to also be someone already trusted, figure out some kind of detail/misinformation/anything the stalker would likely react to, that you could 1) include in the discussions, 2) that could be individualized, and 3) that would tip you off to the individual if it were included in a later mailing.
posted by stormyteal at 6:12 PM on January 30, 2018 [5 favorites]

The Gift of Fear was written by someone who dealt with security for public figures, if *I* was dealing with this situation I'd re-read it, but reading it for the first time will be helpful as well.

Nthing the camera suggestion, as I wouldn't assume that the stalker isn't visiting in person without leaving any obvious calling cards. If the camera never shows a stalker that's reassuring as well. Put them in a non-obvious location. Consider a vehicle camera as well.

YES to stormyteal's last item about being careful in discussing this. Take notes, as this makes it much easier to put these things out of mind when not dealing with them.

Be very circumspect in who to tell that cameras have been put up and any other measures taken.

Good time to do a general assessment of household and online security and fix anything that's been put off.
posted by yohko at 12:44 PM on February 1, 2018

In our neighbourhood, circulation of a despicable publication was halted by a family who was threatened in it, using Section 43 of the Canada Post Corporation Act. It was the perceived threat that finally did it, even though the content was extremely objectionable beyond that - so perhaps the letters can be submitted to an Ombudsman?
posted by peagood at 5:47 PM on February 1, 2018 [2 favorites]