How anxious should I be
April 11, 2017 9:15 AM Subscribe
I need some outside thoughts about how to process and manage this. Potential breast cancer or annoying sensitive skin issue.
Nipple and areola. Lots of changes on the left side. Minor changes on the right.
The areola on the left breast has been puckering for a while, maybe six or more months? Noticed it a while back, curious but not concerned. About a month ago I noticed another change. A patch of yellowed rough skin across maybe a third to half the areola. When it puckered, there was a mildly red raised portion that connected to the nipple. The nipple isn't inverted, but more level when things are going. There have been a couple of minor sores that have appeared and resolved over the last few weeks.
There has been, reassuringly from the reading I've done, some similar, but much much less dramatic activity on the right side with a small ring of yellowish rough changes around the nipple. No puckering.
I had my monthly GP visit today. Shared everything above. Told my GP I'd Dr Googled it (actually DuckDuckGo'd it) and it said one of three things; I'm breastfeeding, it's eczema or I have Paget's. ps, don't believe search results. One look at my profile or age, or basically my profile sorta takes out the first. Eczema? Maybe? Paget's? The images look nothing like what I have going on. Very minor nipple inversion.
My GP did a proper breast exam. Noted the skin changes on the areola and adds that my left breast is lumpy. Says the skin changes are nothing like eczema. I have ultrasounds of both breasts scheduled a week from today. I'm not freaking out, but writing all this out isn't helping.
I've been on HRT for almost three decades. I don't have implants. I've been immunosuppressed for the last six or so years for a chronic illness.
Questions.
The simplest is what could large patches of yellowed rough skin on the areola be?
Or, how did you manage the anxiety of possible breast cancer? I've not told anyone close yet.
Or practical. I haven't had a mammogram before. The Duck said ultrasound is the next step up from a mammogram. What to expect from an ultrasound of both breasts? I've been told it might be up to an hour.
My hope is that this is a nothing burger, but I'm anxious just the same.
Nipple and areola. Lots of changes on the left side. Minor changes on the right.
The areola on the left breast has been puckering for a while, maybe six or more months? Noticed it a while back, curious but not concerned. About a month ago I noticed another change. A patch of yellowed rough skin across maybe a third to half the areola. When it puckered, there was a mildly red raised portion that connected to the nipple. The nipple isn't inverted, but more level when things are going. There have been a couple of minor sores that have appeared and resolved over the last few weeks.
There has been, reassuringly from the reading I've done, some similar, but much much less dramatic activity on the right side with a small ring of yellowish rough changes around the nipple. No puckering.
I had my monthly GP visit today. Shared everything above. Told my GP I'd Dr Googled it (actually DuckDuckGo'd it) and it said one of three things; I'm breastfeeding, it's eczema or I have Paget's. ps, don't believe search results. One look at my profile or age, or basically my profile sorta takes out the first. Eczema? Maybe? Paget's? The images look nothing like what I have going on. Very minor nipple inversion.
My GP did a proper breast exam. Noted the skin changes on the areola and adds that my left breast is lumpy. Says the skin changes are nothing like eczema. I have ultrasounds of both breasts scheduled a week from today. I'm not freaking out, but writing all this out isn't helping.
I've been on HRT for almost three decades. I don't have implants. I've been immunosuppressed for the last six or so years for a chronic illness.
Questions.
The simplest is what could large patches of yellowed rough skin on the areola be?
Or, how did you manage the anxiety of possible breast cancer? I've not told anyone close yet.
Or practical. I haven't had a mammogram before. The Duck said ultrasound is the next step up from a mammogram. What to expect from an ultrasound of both breasts? I've been told it might be up to an hour.
My hope is that this is a nothing burger, but I'm anxious just the same.
Dr. Google says an ultrasound will do a better job imaging in dense breast tissue, and is frequently used in conjunction with a mammogram. I've had a few mammograms and I personally didn't find them painful. If you can tolerate a decently strong squeeze, you won't either.
As far as how to manage the anxiety, well...you've made the appointment, nothing is going to change either way in the next week, and you're all hooked up with the appropriate medical professionals, so you've done all the stuff you could do about it at this point. I would recommend lots of garbage television or brain candy novels, naps, and other things to keep your brain weasels busy in the interim.
posted by Autumnheart at 9:27 AM on April 11, 2017 [3 favorites]
As far as how to manage the anxiety, well...you've made the appointment, nothing is going to change either way in the next week, and you're all hooked up with the appropriate medical professionals, so you've done all the stuff you could do about it at this point. I would recommend lots of garbage television or brain candy novels, naps, and other things to keep your brain weasels busy in the interim.
posted by Autumnheart at 9:27 AM on April 11, 2017 [3 favorites]
Best answer: Recently I noticed an unusual lump in one breast and it was really awful having to wait to find out if it was cancer. It's super stressful. I'm sorry you're having to deal with this. (For what it's worth, I was told it was a temporary benign cyst, which is apparently super common, much more common than breast cancer!)
If the mammogram doesn't wind up confirming anything for you, I recommend you go to a dermatologist. It really could be any number of things, and a derm will be able to consider and test more possibilities for an unusual skin condition than a GP.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:31 AM on April 11, 2017
If the mammogram doesn't wind up confirming anything for you, I recommend you go to a dermatologist. It really could be any number of things, and a derm will be able to consider and test more possibilities for an unusual skin condition than a GP.
posted by showbiz_liz at 9:31 AM on April 11, 2017
Best answer: The answer to the question in your title, "how anxious should I be?" is always "as little as you can manage" because anxiety doesn't change the outcome. You don't get points for it.
You probably either have a bad thing or a troublesome thing, but you definitively have whatever-it-is already. The tests just tell you what it is, which will drive what happens next. It's a clunky mantra, but it's a thing you can remind yourself. Honestly the worst part that you have any sort of control over, if only partial, is the not knowing, and you can remind yourself that not-knowing is terrible but has an end date.
Also, the experience of a scary medical crisis/diagnosis/procedure is now officially considered trauma. You are going through trauma right now, and it's okay to be, like, "this is fucking traumatic right now". You probably have to do stuff like work and deal with people who are not being traumatized currently, and it's up to you how much you want to button up around them, and you may want to role-play in your head or on paper how you're going to choose to play it so you don't additionally have the anxiety of worrying about that happening unprepared. But also, if you can take temporary self-care measures like reduce your unnecessary obligations or move a project around, do that.
You should not take the ultrasound to be any more meaningful than what it is: a better-resolution tool than x-ray. Soft tissue is difficult to visualize with external sources; ultrasound improves in quality with every new development in computer processing. As a procedure, though, it's slow because it's multi-dimensional with a handheld device, and it's both boring and awkward.
posted by Lyn Never at 9:36 AM on April 11, 2017 [8 favorites]
You probably either have a bad thing or a troublesome thing, but you definitively have whatever-it-is already. The tests just tell you what it is, which will drive what happens next. It's a clunky mantra, but it's a thing you can remind yourself. Honestly the worst part that you have any sort of control over, if only partial, is the not knowing, and you can remind yourself that not-knowing is terrible but has an end date.
Also, the experience of a scary medical crisis/diagnosis/procedure is now officially considered trauma. You are going through trauma right now, and it's okay to be, like, "this is fucking traumatic right now". You probably have to do stuff like work and deal with people who are not being traumatized currently, and it's up to you how much you want to button up around them, and you may want to role-play in your head or on paper how you're going to choose to play it so you don't additionally have the anxiety of worrying about that happening unprepared. But also, if you can take temporary self-care measures like reduce your unnecessary obligations or move a project around, do that.
You should not take the ultrasound to be any more meaningful than what it is: a better-resolution tool than x-ray. Soft tissue is difficult to visualize with external sources; ultrasound improves in quality with every new development in computer processing. As a procedure, though, it's slow because it's multi-dimensional with a handheld device, and it's both boring and awkward.
posted by Lyn Never at 9:36 AM on April 11, 2017 [8 favorites]
They actually have a name for this: scanxiety. It's an incredibly common phenomenon and nothing to judge yourself for. Seek out distractions, whatever your cheapest, simplest pleasure is, whether that's binging some TV or reading a lot of fanfic or whatever. Given the relatively short time frame involved, it's probably not worth seeking out anti-anxiety medication, but if it evolves into a longer-term situation, it might be.
posted by praemunire at 9:44 AM on April 11, 2017 [2 favorites]
posted by praemunire at 9:44 AM on April 11, 2017 [2 favorites]
Hi - I had to have two mammograms before the age of 35 because I found weird lumps during BSEs. In both cases, they turned out to be cysts, so my doctor gave me a couple of things to keep in mind so I wouldn't keep showing up and saying "Hey I found a lump". I am passing them along in case they also apply in your case, and that at least helps manage the worry.
1. Your GP said that your breasts were "lumpy". Are these lumps that were always there? Or are they kind of new? If they're kind of new, that is evidence they could just be cysts.
2. If you prod one of the lumps, does it feel like it's kind of moving around in there a little? My cysts do when I get them - it's like, it feels like it's sliding around inside a pocket a little, and when I poke it from one side it slides to the other side. If your lumps feel like that, that's another sign it could be a cyst.
3. My doctor advised me that if I felt a lump again, to see if it felt like those cysts, and then also wait a month before coming in and see whether it went away on its own. This was because a) cysts usually do go away on their own in that time, and b) one month of waiting is not a make-or-break amount of time.
I mean, still keep the appointment to be certain (I know from experience that some anxiety can only be managed by having a person in a white coat tell you "you are okay!"). But if any of those details sound familiar, then those are signs of hope.
Good luck.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:52 AM on April 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
1. Your GP said that your breasts were "lumpy". Are these lumps that were always there? Or are they kind of new? If they're kind of new, that is evidence they could just be cysts.
2. If you prod one of the lumps, does it feel like it's kind of moving around in there a little? My cysts do when I get them - it's like, it feels like it's sliding around inside a pocket a little, and when I poke it from one side it slides to the other side. If your lumps feel like that, that's another sign it could be a cyst.
3. My doctor advised me that if I felt a lump again, to see if it felt like those cysts, and then also wait a month before coming in and see whether it went away on its own. This was because a) cysts usually do go away on their own in that time, and b) one month of waiting is not a make-or-break amount of time.
I mean, still keep the appointment to be certain (I know from experience that some anxiety can only be managed by having a person in a white coat tell you "you are okay!"). But if any of those details sound familiar, then those are signs of hope.
Good luck.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 9:52 AM on April 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
I've had two or three ultrasounds on my breasts. I had my first mammogram at a relatively young age because my breasts were very large and lumpy. It was supposed to be just a baseline, but they saw at least one mass they didn't like the looks of, so I then had an ultrasound on both breasts, and then an ultrasound-guided needle biopsy on one breast.
That was all very stressful because I was expecting just a mammogram! But I tried not to be too anxious or worry too much about worst case scenarios as the results were out of my hands. The mass turned out to be normal lumpy breast tissue and all was well.
Underwent a similar process (without the needle biopsy) recently, a year after my breast reduction. Now my previous mammograms were not relevant and I had scar tissue as well as lumps. They did the mammogram and had me come back for an ultrasound which was very thorough (by which I mean the tech had a heavy hand), but eventually decided what they were seeing was scar tissue.
I will add that overall, the ultrasound is more comfortable than the mammogram for me usually, if that helps. Ultrasound for me is usually reclining and they run the instrument over the breast tissue while I lay back. Mammogram is standing in an awkward position, and my breast tissue is compressed in the machine while I'm holding my breath in discomfort.
Again, for the scar tissue ultrasound, I tried not to dwell on it, talked to my husband about it, distracted myself and just went with my usual "one foot in front of the other" concentration on getting through each day.
posted by Squeak Attack at 9:59 AM on April 11, 2017
That was all very stressful because I was expecting just a mammogram! But I tried not to be too anxious or worry too much about worst case scenarios as the results were out of my hands. The mass turned out to be normal lumpy breast tissue and all was well.
Underwent a similar process (without the needle biopsy) recently, a year after my breast reduction. Now my previous mammograms were not relevant and I had scar tissue as well as lumps. They did the mammogram and had me come back for an ultrasound which was very thorough (by which I mean the tech had a heavy hand), but eventually decided what they were seeing was scar tissue.
I will add that overall, the ultrasound is more comfortable than the mammogram for me usually, if that helps. Ultrasound for me is usually reclining and they run the instrument over the breast tissue while I lay back. Mammogram is standing in an awkward position, and my breast tissue is compressed in the machine while I'm holding my breath in discomfort.
Again, for the scar tissue ultrasound, I tried not to dwell on it, talked to my husband about it, distracted myself and just went with my usual "one foot in front of the other" concentration on getting through each day.
posted by Squeak Attack at 9:59 AM on April 11, 2017
how did you manage the anxiety of possible breast cancer? I've not told anyone close yet.
Tell someone. I have had breast cancer. It was way way way better when I started telling people and stopped trying to deal with the anxiety on my own. Saying the words to someone helps a lot, even if those words are "I'm really scared and trying not to worry about this."
I know from experience that it doesn't matter, mentally or otherwise, what is statistically likely to be the case - when you're talking about your own body, statistics are irrelevant. It's scary, plain and simple, to be faced with the unknown; you're one individual and nobody can tell you what's going on with you until you have the tests and get the results. So just try to distract yourself as much as possible, and take comfort in the fact that even if your results are not good, you're beginning the process of figuring it out and getting treatment. I watched a fuckton of Arrested Development during the similar period of uncertainty in my life. It helped.
posted by something something at 10:10 AM on April 11, 2017 [8 favorites]
Tell someone. I have had breast cancer. It was way way way better when I started telling people and stopped trying to deal with the anxiety on my own. Saying the words to someone helps a lot, even if those words are "I'm really scared and trying not to worry about this."
I know from experience that it doesn't matter, mentally or otherwise, what is statistically likely to be the case - when you're talking about your own body, statistics are irrelevant. It's scary, plain and simple, to be faced with the unknown; you're one individual and nobody can tell you what's going on with you until you have the tests and get the results. So just try to distract yourself as much as possible, and take comfort in the fact that even if your results are not good, you're beginning the process of figuring it out and getting treatment. I watched a fuckton of Arrested Development during the similar period of uncertainty in my life. It helped.
posted by something something at 10:10 AM on April 11, 2017 [8 favorites]
Not sure I can help with the anxiety other than to say - if you really can't share with anybody close reach out to a support group or the Samaritans or perhaps somebody at your church or whatever such resource may be available to you and talk about your fear.
If that is helpful I can share my ultrasound experience. I've had both ultrasound and mammogram at the same appointment. First the mammogram and then the ultrasound because at my age apparently it makes sense to do both. They were both kinda awkward, not exactly painful but you know - cold ultrasound jelly and a wand poking your boobs is never going to be very pleasant. In my case they actually did a first assessment of the images then and there and told me they had seen nothing that caused them concern. They also said there was a second review process as a matter of course and they would call me back if that identified anything. They didn't call me back. Wishing you strength while you wait.
posted by koahiatamadl at 11:07 AM on April 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
If that is helpful I can share my ultrasound experience. I've had both ultrasound and mammogram at the same appointment. First the mammogram and then the ultrasound because at my age apparently it makes sense to do both. They were both kinda awkward, not exactly painful but you know - cold ultrasound jelly and a wand poking your boobs is never going to be very pleasant. In my case they actually did a first assessment of the images then and there and told me they had seen nothing that caused them concern. They also said there was a second review process as a matter of course and they would call me back if that identified anything. They didn't call me back. Wishing you strength while you wait.
posted by koahiatamadl at 11:07 AM on April 11, 2017 [1 favorite]
Do you meditate or have you ever? I find that it helps me in this sort of situation. I would do some healing visualizations during the meditation to kind of get a start on your treatment for whatever it is.
I suspect, if nothing else, this gives me a sense of control, a sense that I am doing something productive rather than just sitting and worrying.
There are guided meditations on YouTube if you'd prefer some structure, poke around and see if any of them speak to you.
posted by BoscosMom at 11:16 AM on April 11, 2017
I suspect, if nothing else, this gives me a sense of control, a sense that I am doing something productive rather than just sitting and worrying.
There are guided meditations on YouTube if you'd prefer some structure, poke around and see if any of them speak to you.
posted by BoscosMom at 11:16 AM on April 11, 2017
Do you have a friend who would go to the procedure with you? They'd probably have to bring a book and sit in the waiting room, but it might be comforting.
posted by bunderful at 5:37 PM on April 11, 2017
posted by bunderful at 5:37 PM on April 11, 2017
Best answer: I'm a former cancer patient with ongoing worries about recurrence, and when I'm getting anxious about my health, I really like some of the techniques and advice on this site:
http://www.anxieties.com/55/panic-step3g#.WO12lPnyuM8
Particularly mantras like: "I accept the possibility that this plane could crash. I'm going to think and feel and act as though this plane is 100% safe. I accept the risk that I might be wrong." (substitute in looming health worry).
I find that "I accept the risk..." creates a much more positive feeling for me than "It's probably nothing" or "I shouldn't worry" or other minimizing language -- something about it feels adventurous and uplifting and gives a sense of bravery rather than trying to sweep the scared feelings under the rug.
posted by space snail at 5:42 PM on April 11, 2017 [7 favorites]
http://www.anxieties.com/55/panic-step3g#.WO12lPnyuM8
Particularly mantras like: "I accept the possibility that this plane could crash. I'm going to think and feel and act as though this plane is 100% safe. I accept the risk that I might be wrong." (substitute in looming health worry).
I find that "I accept the risk..." creates a much more positive feeling for me than "It's probably nothing" or "I shouldn't worry" or other minimizing language -- something about it feels adventurous and uplifting and gives a sense of bravery rather than trying to sweep the scared feelings under the rug.
posted by space snail at 5:42 PM on April 11, 2017 [7 favorites]
I dealt with the same worry recently. My mammograms were really no big deal. I've been told they're harder for small breasted women. I went for my screening and then got called back for a diagnostic one. That same day they did an ultrasound. It wasn't too bad except the keeping your arm up thing. I had terrible shoulder pain before the ultrasound and it didn't help any. After the ultrasound, they scheduled a biopsy. It wasn't as traumatic as I thought it would be. I didn't freak out until I saw the thing they were going to use. But it didn't hurt, just pressure and a really loud sound.
I was eventually diagnosed with a stage one DCIS. I've had surgery and just today I saw the medical and radiation oncologists. In two weeks I get my genetic results back.
The thing that's probably helped me most is talking to my psychologist. She's been a great support and I don't think I would have gotten through so far with my sanity intact. I've noticed that all of my doctors now ask about the surgery and what is going on now (even my bariatric surgeon asked). I like what space snail said. I guess I've been doing the same for my genetic results. I can't change anything with worrying, but I still do worry.
Worry is normal. It's really flipping scary. I hate the C-word. I hate pink. I hate the people who tell me that I did X, Y, Z and that's the reason I developed cancer. I hate the people who think they know more than my doctors and want me to read books by naturopaths. I hate this whole stupid thing. But that's spurring me to action. It makes me want to fight. And fight I will!
Please feel to me-mail or email (kathryn.metafilter@gmail.com). All the best of luck to you! I'll keep you in my thoughts.
posted by kathrynm at 9:45 AM on April 12, 2017
I was eventually diagnosed with a stage one DCIS. I've had surgery and just today I saw the medical and radiation oncologists. In two weeks I get my genetic results back.
The thing that's probably helped me most is talking to my psychologist. She's been a great support and I don't think I would have gotten through so far with my sanity intact. I've noticed that all of my doctors now ask about the surgery and what is going on now (even my bariatric surgeon asked). I like what space snail said. I guess I've been doing the same for my genetic results. I can't change anything with worrying, but I still do worry.
Worry is normal. It's really flipping scary. I hate the C-word. I hate pink. I hate the people who tell me that I did X, Y, Z and that's the reason I developed cancer. I hate the people who think they know more than my doctors and want me to read books by naturopaths. I hate this whole stupid thing. But that's spurring me to action. It makes me want to fight. And fight I will!
Please feel to me-mail or email (kathryn.metafilter@gmail.com). All the best of luck to you! I'll keep you in my thoughts.
posted by kathrynm at 9:45 AM on April 12, 2017
Response by poster: Just wanted to let you know I had the scan today. Basically, he said there's nothing notable in the ultrasound that would require immediate additional investigations. He did comment that the nipple/areola complex looked infected to him and asked if my GP had prescribed a course of antibiotics.
I've called my GP, as requested, to let him know the scans were done. I anticipate he'll return the call tomorrow once he's received the final report (The hospital said they'd get the report across in 24 hours). I've also taken close-up pictures of both sides so we have a record to show my Dermatologist, assuming that's the next step.
Thanks for all the comments and support. I know a clean ultrasound is not the end all in diagnostics, but it makes it all the more likely that this is just one of those strange things.
posted by michswiss at 10:28 PM on April 17, 2017 [1 favorite]
I've called my GP, as requested, to let him know the scans were done. I anticipate he'll return the call tomorrow once he's received the final report (The hospital said they'd get the report across in 24 hours). I've also taken close-up pictures of both sides so we have a record to show my Dermatologist, assuming that's the next step.
Thanks for all the comments and support. I know a clean ultrasound is not the end all in diagnostics, but it makes it all the more likely that this is just one of those strange things.
posted by michswiss at 10:28 PM on April 17, 2017 [1 favorite]
This thread is closed to new comments.
I can't speak to the skin piece of your question but I can tell you about my ultrasound experience. I ended up with an ultrasound that found some badness that needed further imaging which turned out to be a mammogram and another ultrasound with a biopsy. So your experience of going to the ultrasound first without a mammogram is the same as mine. (Apparently mammograms aren't as good with younger women because the breast tissue is denser so ultrasounds are a better diagnostic tool.) The test itself was pretty painless - there is sometimes some pressure as they poke the wand into you to get a better picture of whatever they are looking at - but largely it's just kind of vaguely uncomfortable because your all sticky with the ultrasound goo.
I got results reported back to my doctor pretty quickly and then went for my additional tests. I think generally that if they find anything suspicious they'd move to a biopsy so that they can see what's actually going on more definitively.
I will cross my fingers on your behalf that your screening goes smoothly and you get good news. Feel free to memail me about anything. My news was bad but I'm 2 years post treatment now and am happy to talk about any of it.
posted by machine at 9:26 AM on April 11, 2017 [1 favorite]