Tenant/housemate with a drinking problem

November 27, 2016 7:58 PM

My friend A owns a large house and rents out 3 rooms, while she lives in the 4th room. One of the housemates, D (the brother of one of A's friends), is a nice enough guy, but shortly after he moved in she discovered that he gets drunk every night. She is wondering a) what to do? and b) what steps to take to do it.

D is not belligerent or violent, but he gets drunk every night and then stumbles around and talks incoherently and makes messes or spills things and doesn't clean up after himself. The other housemates have complained that he has pressured them to drink with him, which they now know to refuse (when they first moved in, they didn't realize the extent of his drinking). A has mentioned the drinking to him and to members of his family (A is friends with his sister, which is how he ended up moving in to begin with), but both he and the family have denied that he has a problem with alcohol. He has done things like leave the stove on and leave the front door unlocked when he was the last person to leave for the day. She spoke to him about these incidents, and he hasn't done it again. He has a full-time job and pays rent on time. A is sympathetic and feels for this guy, but his behavior is making her and her other housemates uncomfortable. Everyone is in their 30's. D has lived there for 7-8 months, and the two other housemates moved in about 3 months ago. A would like the household to be comprised of people who get along and can have fun together, and right now it's a pretty uncomfortable atmosphere for everyone. Unfortunately, A also needs tenants in the house because she cannot afford to have unoccupied rooms. A is considering asking D to move out, and giving him a month to do so. Is this reasonable of her? Are there other steps she should take first? Are there other considerations (legal or otherwise) that she should be thinking of, given that she is both the landlord and a housemate in this situation? She has also considered waiting until the summer to ask him to move out, because she is nervous about not being able to find anyone else to take the room starting in January. Is this an option worth considering?

posted by sleepingwithcats to Home & Garden (19 answers total)

a) evict him. b) a process which varies from area to area.
posted by zippy at 8:04 PM on November 27, 2016 [6 favorites]

There will never be a good time. If you wait for one it will never come to pass. Do it now.
posted by JayRwv at 8:14 PM on November 27, 2016 [4 favorites]

What A needs to do legally depends on the terms of their lease agreement and also what state A lives in.
posted by Karaage at 8:19 PM on November 27, 2016 [6 favorites]

She'll lose a lot more money if the other tenants move out while she waits to line up a replacement. Or if he leaves the door open and they get burgled/a stray cat wanders in and pees everywhere, or if he starts a fire with his drunk kitchen behaviour.
It doesn't matter if he or his family think he has a problem with alcohol, it matters that his drinking is causing problems for the household he lives in. And maybe getting evicted for being a drunk will help him realize that he does have a problem anyway.
posted by the agents of KAOS at 8:47 PM on November 27, 2016 [17 favorites]

Is there a lease signed?
posted by corb at 9:05 PM on November 27, 2016

Response by poster: Thanks for your answers so far. I am not sure if there is a lease signed. I believe she is planning to ask him to move out without going through a formal eviction process. Is a formal eviction process necessary? She is a new homeowner/landlord and I think this situation is a bit overwhelming for her. This is in MA.
posted by sleepingwithcats at 9:22 PM on November 27, 2016

Best answer: Here's a brief overview of Massachusetts tenant law. It sounds like he's a tenant at will if there's no lease. If there is a lease she will need to abide by its terms. She will need to give him written notice 30 days (or 1 rental period) ahead, and will need to refund his security deposit, etc., in a timely way. Some cities may have additional rights/restrictions and she can probably figure it out by googling "Cityname tenant rights". There may also be a local housing authority or board she can call with questions. (Note: sometimes there are less restrictive rules about ending a roommate situation, which is what this is, but it will probably still require 30 days notice).
posted by The Elusive Architeuthis at 9:53 PM on November 27, 2016

In many places if someone rents a room from the owner of a house, and the owner lives in the house along with them and they share kitchen facilities, the situation is different (legally speaking) from being a renter/tenant. The person renting the room is sometimes referred to as a "lodger" or "boarder" and sometimes they have fewer legal protections/it's easier for the landlord/owner to ask them to leave.
posted by needs more cowbell at 10:23 PM on November 27, 2016 [4 favorites]

There's the legal piece and then there's the human piece. She can start things moving on the latter via a serious conversation about how things aren't working out and suggesting that he start looking for other housing.
posted by salvia at 10:48 PM on November 27, 2016 [1 favorite]

There's the legal piece and then there's the human piece. She can start things moving on the latter

If you're dealing with a mature, reasonable person, sure. But as she's clearly unsure what she can/can't do there is a lot of potential for that to get stressful if the housemate is unreasonable or starts to argue or challenge this. If she's clear on her obligations she can put together a script for the conversation and stick to her guns calmly and with certainty. The human aspect is to give reasonable notice. But she should wait the extra day or so that it will take her to research this fully and then sit him down.
posted by koahiatamadl at 11:28 PM on November 27, 2016 [5 favorites]

Yes, she should evict him.

In addition to the Massachusetts state laws there also might be local ordinances depending on where you are. Where I used to live in Somerville laws were very favorable to tenants (e.g. Regarding deposits and their handling and timely return). I would strongly suggest finding your local tenant/landlord organization, and hopefully also consulting with a lawyer in the area. Yes that will cost money, but it'll cost a bunch more if the eviction process isn't followed properly.

On a personal level, if you care about the roommate or the sister of the roommate, explaining that this eviction is a direct result of his drinking and his problematic behavior while doing so could eventually result in them getting him help. But don't count on that-do the eviction, follow the law, and move on to a happier household in the end.
posted by nat at 1:38 AM on November 28, 2016

This is actually the perfect time to do this, because with 30 days notice he can pick up another rental from 1 January. She needs to both tell him and give him a notice in writing at the same time.
posted by DarlingBri at 4:02 AM on November 28, 2016 [1 favorite]

I would be very, very careful to do everything by the book - she shouldn't talk to him at all until she's consulted her local law (and, to be honest, a local lawyer) and knows exactly the process to take for a legal eviction. Otherwise, she runs the risk of accidentally veering in to illegal eviction territory, in which case (depending on his level of vindictiveness and litigiousness), the tenant can make her life extremely difficult.
posted by Itaxpica at 6:01 AM on November 28, 2016 [5 favorites]

Evicting during the holidays will ruin her relationship with her friend and their family. If it must be done, fine.

I'm pointing out that the owner of the house was aware this was an issue before the other housemates moved in. Your friend has some soul searching to do because a failure on their part contributed mightily to the very poor timing. If at all possible they should handle this in a low key way after New Years. It's been 7/8 months of this already, it's deeply unpleasant, but certainly there's not that much urgency. I propose acting slowly and thoughtfully.
posted by jbenben at 6:54 AM on November 28, 2016 [2 favorites]

Well here's the tricky part: this is about his drinking, but it really shouldn't be. I mean, I get that's what's making people uncomfortable and that's not unreasonable. But objectively, "She spoke to him about these incidents, and he hasn't done it again. He has a full-time job and pays rent on time."

So I guess it's lucky he doesn't have a lease, because "drinking" isn't a lease-breaking offense. The things he does while drunk might be if he continues to do them. This is more of a "you know, this just isn't working out, we're just not clicking" situation. If he's paying money to live there, A should really talk to a lawyer before doing anything.
posted by ctmf at 9:52 AM on November 28, 2016 [6 favorites]

I wonder if the answers to this question would be different if it were framed as "Landlord wants to evict me because I drink, even though she cited specific problems created by my drinking and I have rectified them." That might not be completely accurate; it may be that "makes messes or spills things and doesn't clean up after himself" is a continuing problem. But I think the landlord is in an ethically problematic situation here if she evicts the tenant without first stating clearly what she requires if he wishes to stay and giving him a chance to comply.
posted by layceepee at 12:44 PM on November 28, 2016 [5 favorites]

Why in all hell would A talk to him or anyone else about his drinking? That is absolutely zero of a landlord's business. Leaving burners on and not locking common doors is, and the conversation should stick to that.

Also, I suspect that "he gets drunk" is not a legally sound reason to evict someone. He needs to be notified of exactly what behaviors need to stop/start in order to avoid eviction and be given a chance to comply.
posted by cmoj at 1:20 PM on November 28, 2016

Disturbing the peace and quiet of other tenants, in my very tenant-friendly jurisdiction, is a valid reason to evict. That he's drunk every day in the common areas and doing what drunk people do every day seems to satisfy this, eg he gets drunk every night and then stumbles around and talks incoherently
posted by zippy at 3:49 PM on November 28, 2016 [2 favorites]

I am a landlord, but in Canada (and IANAL). I would advise the following, which I think is generic enough it'll apply anywhere:

• Document everything, in great detail. Messes, noise, whatever. Get pictures, make notes of who was present
• Look at the history of payment, damage, anything else you can find to build a case that this person is a bad tenant
• Find a paralegal who specializes in this kind of thing. It can be really expensive to get people out of a property; it'll be less so with a paralegal
• Consider making an offer to the problem tenant of money if they'll agree to move out. Signed, legal agreement, written and sent by the paralegal. This may be the fastest and cheapest way to get the person out
• Do not wade into the personal side of things if you're looking to take a legal route. Keep things as formal as possible. This is a business relationship, not a relationship relationship

Good luck to your friend.
posted by sincarne at 1:21 PM on November 29, 2016