Is there such a thing as a medical leave for exhaustion and depression?
June 18, 2013 11:11 AM Subscribe
I'm exhausted and depressed and it's affecting my health and my work. Is there any way I could take a medical leave of absence and not lose my job?
I've been at my nonprofit for seven years. Changed jobs a year ago within the same organization to get away from a bullying boss. (I did end up telling HR and her boss, who I worked with closely, and another manager on my team whom I'm close to about this but it looks like nothing happened to her.)
I had so much hope for the new job but it hasn't gone well. I have a very strained relationship with my new boss (she doesn't like me), and the other manager who I worked closely with and really liked a lot quit after her job began to negatively affect her health.
For a very long time (really, the first four years or so) I was managing to keep my chin up and focus on the good things, but now I'm feeling exhausted and hopeless. I had a very difficult year with no training period or support, and I just can't seem to feel motivated and positive anymore. I know my job is a good one and there are many great things about it but every day I am crying about it, often when I am there. I am overeating (I gained 30# in the last 5 months) and not sleeping and having headaches, high blood pressure, anxiety attacks, etc. I'm worn down and worn out.
Two women with similar jobs to mine have recently taken six months maternity leave and the organization held their positions. We have very senior people who have taken 4-6 month sabbaticals. Is there any such thing as taking a medical leave to rest and regain my mental and physical health? I have about 3 months worth of illness leave accrued and about 2 months paid time off. I really want 3-6 months off and I would honestly be fine with taking time unpaid if I could keep my job. I have never taken any illness leave, Family leave, maternity leave, or even any time off longer than a week.
The problem is, even though I do skilled work (and I do it well), many people would love my job and they could replace me easily. They would have to get someone in temporarily because they can't do without my work altogether. Because I moved work areas a year ago, and I haven't really made friends/allies in my new job, particularly with my boss, I doubt they'd be inclined to accommodate me.
I am not currently seeing a therapist (or doctor) but I feel pretty confident I could get a note of some kind. It's pretty obvious that I'm having a lot of trouble. I am basically trying to find an alternative to quitting, which I know would be a disaster.
At this point, I want to stay at my organization, and I want to keep doing what I am doing. But I am not functioning very well. I'm not thinking about this lightly -- I've been working under a lot of pressure for the last nine years, and I think the bullying really got to me and now this last year is sort of feeling like the last straw. I keep thinking that I used to have a thick skin and a sense of humor and perspective and now I can't seem to summon it anymore.
Is a medical leave like this something that is possible? Will it damage my career? If they end up firing me, would they report it to future employers? If this is something people sometimes do, what are the steps I would need to take? Thank you for your help.
I've been at my nonprofit for seven years. Changed jobs a year ago within the same organization to get away from a bullying boss. (I did end up telling HR and her boss, who I worked with closely, and another manager on my team whom I'm close to about this but it looks like nothing happened to her.)
I had so much hope for the new job but it hasn't gone well. I have a very strained relationship with my new boss (she doesn't like me), and the other manager who I worked closely with and really liked a lot quit after her job began to negatively affect her health.
For a very long time (really, the first four years or so) I was managing to keep my chin up and focus on the good things, but now I'm feeling exhausted and hopeless. I had a very difficult year with no training period or support, and I just can't seem to feel motivated and positive anymore. I know my job is a good one and there are many great things about it but every day I am crying about it, often when I am there. I am overeating (I gained 30# in the last 5 months) and not sleeping and having headaches, high blood pressure, anxiety attacks, etc. I'm worn down and worn out.
Two women with similar jobs to mine have recently taken six months maternity leave and the organization held their positions. We have very senior people who have taken 4-6 month sabbaticals. Is there any such thing as taking a medical leave to rest and regain my mental and physical health? I have about 3 months worth of illness leave accrued and about 2 months paid time off. I really want 3-6 months off and I would honestly be fine with taking time unpaid if I could keep my job. I have never taken any illness leave, Family leave, maternity leave, or even any time off longer than a week.
The problem is, even though I do skilled work (and I do it well), many people would love my job and they could replace me easily. They would have to get someone in temporarily because they can't do without my work altogether. Because I moved work areas a year ago, and I haven't really made friends/allies in my new job, particularly with my boss, I doubt they'd be inclined to accommodate me.
I am not currently seeing a therapist (or doctor) but I feel pretty confident I could get a note of some kind. It's pretty obvious that I'm having a lot of trouble. I am basically trying to find an alternative to quitting, which I know would be a disaster.
At this point, I want to stay at my organization, and I want to keep doing what I am doing. But I am not functioning very well. I'm not thinking about this lightly -- I've been working under a lot of pressure for the last nine years, and I think the bullying really got to me and now this last year is sort of feeling like the last straw. I keep thinking that I used to have a thick skin and a sense of humor and perspective and now I can't seem to summon it anymore.
Is a medical leave like this something that is possible? Will it damage my career? If they end up firing me, would they report it to future employers? If this is something people sometimes do, what are the steps I would need to take? Thank you for your help.
Where you are is basically the most important piece of information we need to answer this question.
IF you are in the US AND you work in a place with at least 50 employees in a 75 mile radius AND you have at least 12 months and 1250 hours of service then you qualify for FMLA leave and you can take that for depression. You will absolutely need to go to a doctor and that doctor will need to fill out paperwork that indicates that you MUST take a leave of absence. You can't just walk into the HR department and be like, "I don't feel well, I'm going to take some time off." This will require ongoing doctor's notes and updates on your condition and ability to return to work.
posted by magnetsphere at 11:17 AM on June 18, 2013 [12 favorites]
IF you are in the US AND you work in a place with at least 50 employees in a 75 mile radius AND you have at least 12 months and 1250 hours of service then you qualify for FMLA leave and you can take that for depression. You will absolutely need to go to a doctor and that doctor will need to fill out paperwork that indicates that you MUST take a leave of absence. You can't just walk into the HR department and be like, "I don't feel well, I'm going to take some time off." This will require ongoing doctor's notes and updates on your condition and ability to return to work.
posted by magnetsphere at 11:17 AM on June 18, 2013 [12 favorites]
Someone on my team did exactly this a few years ago, to great personal benefit. It's obviously going to depend heavily on the country and (in the case of the US) state that you're in, but in California, it can be done.
posted by deadmessenger at 11:20 AM on June 18, 2013
posted by deadmessenger at 11:20 AM on June 18, 2013
Which country are you in? You can send an email to the mods for an anonymous update. It's essential for answering your question. Considering how much leave you have accrued, I'm guessing it's not the US.
In most European countries you can take leave for an illness, no matter what the illness. Your company will not be told what illness was used for justifying the leave. I would NOT recommend telling your employer what it's for, either; depression doesn't have a stigma with many people any more, but like anything, even cancer, it will become the subject of office gossip. (I am speaking as someone who overheard office gossip about a man who went on a long leave for cancer and ended up dying. Very sad.)
Speak with your GP, who should be able to advise you on leave you could take, and who could also refer you to (likely) a psychiatrist. You'll also want a therapist of your own. In EU countries, at least those I'm familiar with, the psychiatrist is "only" there for medical and official purposes. They're the ones signing off on the medical leave authorizations. They don't really offer therapy. You definitely want a therapist of your choosing.
posted by fraula at 11:21 AM on June 18, 2013
In most European countries you can take leave for an illness, no matter what the illness. Your company will not be told what illness was used for justifying the leave. I would NOT recommend telling your employer what it's for, either; depression doesn't have a stigma with many people any more, but like anything, even cancer, it will become the subject of office gossip. (I am speaking as someone who overheard office gossip about a man who went on a long leave for cancer and ended up dying. Very sad.)
Speak with your GP, who should be able to advise you on leave you could take, and who could also refer you to (likely) a psychiatrist. You'll also want a therapist of your own. In EU countries, at least those I'm familiar with, the psychiatrist is "only" there for medical and official purposes. They're the ones signing off on the medical leave authorizations. They don't really offer therapy. You definitely want a therapist of your choosing.
posted by fraula at 11:21 AM on June 18, 2013
Hi - I too work in the non-profit sector, and it is not uncommon for folks in this area to get to a place like where you are.
Without knowing the specifics of where you work (both organizational policy and workplace regulations) it's hard to answer this specifically (I'll be speaking from my experiences in Canada). But the short answer is yes, it is highly possible for you to do something like this; I have had staff need this in my organization as well.
I would recommend that you start by taking some of that accrued vacation time before anything else - get away from there, for a week or longer. Also, get clear on your organization's HR policies around medical leaves, but try to do so without discussing it with your HR department. Your worries about how you are perceived or what they are thinking about your job may not be accurate due to the strain you are under, but I would advise you don't tip anybody off inside your organization as to how you are feeling or that you are considering this until you have your ducks in a row. Hopefully you have an HR manual or other policy manual that spells this out.
During that time off, get in to see a doctor. Get checked out for any physical problems that could be causing how you are feeling, and also make sure that how you are feeling isn't starting to cause other health problems. Talk about your level of stress and strain. This is important for two reasons: a) your general well-being is suffering, and needs to be addressed before you have serious health problems and b) I would anticipate that you will need a letter or something from a doctor indicating that you need a medical leave.
Once you have that, you go to HR and begin the medical leave process. Once you have the letter from the doctor stating you have a medical issue, you should be protected from being fired or any disciplinary action; again, the legislation behind this will depend on your jurisdiction, but you should be protected from reprisals. For our staff, they are put on Employment Insurance (meaning they receive a portion of the salary they are entitled to, but through a government program, not the organization) and can maintain any health benefits through our health plan by continuing to pay their portion of the deductions.
Once they are on medical leave, the employer is obligated to have a position for them when they are medically cleared to return. I believe the language in my jurisdiction is "equivalent" which means we don't always (but usually do) bring them back into their previous role. However, roles and structures can change while you are away, resulting in changes to your position and responsibilities.
In my organization, someone can't return from medical leave without the doctor clearing them. The purpose of the time is to ensure treatment of whatever medical conditions required the leave; once that is complete, the person is expected to return.
I hope this helps - if you want further discussion with someone who understands the sector and the pressures, memail me.
Whatever you decide to do, please take some time off (you have large chunks of it you are entitled to!) and see a doctor. Even if you don't decide to pursue a medical leave, you do need to take care of yourself.
posted by nubs at 11:28 AM on June 18, 2013 [5 favorites]
Without knowing the specifics of where you work (both organizational policy and workplace regulations) it's hard to answer this specifically (I'll be speaking from my experiences in Canada). But the short answer is yes, it is highly possible for you to do something like this; I have had staff need this in my organization as well.
I would recommend that you start by taking some of that accrued vacation time before anything else - get away from there, for a week or longer. Also, get clear on your organization's HR policies around medical leaves, but try to do so without discussing it with your HR department. Your worries about how you are perceived or what they are thinking about your job may not be accurate due to the strain you are under, but I would advise you don't tip anybody off inside your organization as to how you are feeling or that you are considering this until you have your ducks in a row. Hopefully you have an HR manual or other policy manual that spells this out.
During that time off, get in to see a doctor. Get checked out for any physical problems that could be causing how you are feeling, and also make sure that how you are feeling isn't starting to cause other health problems. Talk about your level of stress and strain. This is important for two reasons: a) your general well-being is suffering, and needs to be addressed before you have serious health problems and b) I would anticipate that you will need a letter or something from a doctor indicating that you need a medical leave.
Once you have that, you go to HR and begin the medical leave process. Once you have the letter from the doctor stating you have a medical issue, you should be protected from being fired or any disciplinary action; again, the legislation behind this will depend on your jurisdiction, but you should be protected from reprisals. For our staff, they are put on Employment Insurance (meaning they receive a portion of the salary they are entitled to, but through a government program, not the organization) and can maintain any health benefits through our health plan by continuing to pay their portion of the deductions.
Once they are on medical leave, the employer is obligated to have a position for them when they are medically cleared to return. I believe the language in my jurisdiction is "equivalent" which means we don't always (but usually do) bring them back into their previous role. However, roles and structures can change while you are away, resulting in changes to your position and responsibilities.
In my organization, someone can't return from medical leave without the doctor clearing them. The purpose of the time is to ensure treatment of whatever medical conditions required the leave; once that is complete, the person is expected to return.
I hope this helps - if you want further discussion with someone who understands the sector and the pressures, memail me.
Whatever you decide to do, please take some time off (you have large chunks of it you are entitled to!) and see a doctor. Even if you don't decide to pursue a medical leave, you do need to take care of yourself.
posted by nubs at 11:28 AM on June 18, 2013 [5 favorites]
I've said, "I'm burnt out and I need some time off or I'll be useless later." I used vacation time - do you have any? Also depends on your manager, but it can't hurt to ask, frankly.
posted by L'Estrange Fruit at 11:52 AM on June 18, 2013
posted by L'Estrange Fruit at 11:52 AM on June 18, 2013
I work in social services so I know how exhausting it can be. To top it off, our manager is pretty useless - the best thing about him is he is mostly absentee. My point is, no one is looking out for me, so I have to look out for myself and ask for what I need because he isn't going to seek me out to see if I need anything. You have proven your loyalty and sound like you work hard. Employment is a two-way street - they need you and you need them. You work hard and they take care of you. So my suggestion is use the resources they have given you.
First, take your vacation time. I don't mean to sound harsh but the fact that you have two months accrued tells me you are not taking care of yourself. You earned it. You are entitled to it. Use it. You may feel bad for taking time off or disloyal or whatever but working non-stop is not sustainable. I always think of it this way - the first lesson of EMT class is "scene safety" meaning if you rush in to an unsafe environment and get hurt, you are not only not helping the patient but now you have added to the burden of your team. You have to take care of yourself first before you can help anyone else.
Second, assuming you have access to medical care, see your doctor. You (or your agency) is paying for medical insurance so use that resource! Does your company have an Employee Assistance Program? Take advantage of it. Ours is a completely confidential, free program. I can go talk with someone for six visits. We can either address the problem or I can get set up with longer-term plan.
Third, as others have said, read your HR manual/employee handbook. It may not matter if your manager isn't inclined to help you. She may be required to. Be clear on your HR and vacation/sick time usage policies. If you are concerned about retaliation of some kind, talk with HR and enlist their help. Keep a record of your meetings.
Give people an opportunity to help you. Compassion fatigue, burn-out, depression - none of this is uncommon in social services. Most employers want to keep their staff happy and healthy so you can stay productive. My otherwise frustrating and absentee manager was surprisingly helpful with I asked for assistance.
posted by Beti at 12:23 PM on June 18, 2013
First, take your vacation time. I don't mean to sound harsh but the fact that you have two months accrued tells me you are not taking care of yourself. You earned it. You are entitled to it. Use it. You may feel bad for taking time off or disloyal or whatever but working non-stop is not sustainable. I always think of it this way - the first lesson of EMT class is "scene safety" meaning if you rush in to an unsafe environment and get hurt, you are not only not helping the patient but now you have added to the burden of your team. You have to take care of yourself first before you can help anyone else.
Second, assuming you have access to medical care, see your doctor. You (or your agency) is paying for medical insurance so use that resource! Does your company have an Employee Assistance Program? Take advantage of it. Ours is a completely confidential, free program. I can go talk with someone for six visits. We can either address the problem or I can get set up with longer-term plan.
Third, as others have said, read your HR manual/employee handbook. It may not matter if your manager isn't inclined to help you. She may be required to. Be clear on your HR and vacation/sick time usage policies. If you are concerned about retaliation of some kind, talk with HR and enlist their help. Keep a record of your meetings.
Give people an opportunity to help you. Compassion fatigue, burn-out, depression - none of this is uncommon in social services. Most employers want to keep their staff happy and healthy so you can stay productive. My otherwise frustrating and absentee manager was surprisingly helpful with I asked for assistance.
posted by Beti at 12:23 PM on June 18, 2013
You are, in fact, ill. In the US, The Family Medical Leave Act (FMLA) may apply, as MoonOrb described quite well. You should be getting care from your doctor and probably also a therapist. Workplace bullying and nastiness are quite real, and can make you ill. Stress has significant negative effects on your body. This may be a work-related condition, and you may be eligible for worker's comp. Use your sick leave, and then use vacation time when the sick leave is used up. You're sick, and this is what sick leave is for. You may not have to tell your supervisor what the illness is.
1. Make an appt. with your doctor today.
2. Once you have talked to your doctor, and gotten a recommendation to take some time away from the office, call HR to find out what the process is for taking the time.
3. Your employer may have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) that will help pay for therapy.
4. Depression can bring out the worst in others. Depressed people may be irritable, low-energy, and are not chipper and gung ho. Even people who aren't always bullies can get ugly, and the bullies sense weakness and attack. Don't let your job make you sicker.
posted by Mom at 12:54 PM on June 18, 2013
1. Make an appt. with your doctor today.
2. Once you have talked to your doctor, and gotten a recommendation to take some time away from the office, call HR to find out what the process is for taking the time.
3. Your employer may have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) that will help pay for therapy.
4. Depression can bring out the worst in others. Depressed people may be irritable, low-energy, and are not chipper and gung ho. Even people who aren't always bullies can get ugly, and the bullies sense weakness and attack. Don't let your job make you sicker.
posted by Mom at 12:54 PM on June 18, 2013
Get a doctor's note to take time off, NOW!!!! Before you start sucking at your job and get justifiably fired for sucking. Don't be a hero, it can't humanly go-on indefinitely. Take time off, get better, and come back to be your best. I say this from my own painful, misguided experience. Do as I say and not as I do.
posted by wutangclan at 5:09 PM on June 18, 2013
posted by wutangclan at 5:09 PM on June 18, 2013
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posted by forkisbetter at 11:16 AM on June 18, 2013