A walking fashion "Don't"
January 23, 2012 4:42 AM Subscribe
Hopeless Fashion Filter, Man-Edition: What the heck should I wear to this wedding? Uggh.
Outdoor wedding in Florida next month. I've put on about 10 pounds recently, so all my dressy clothes are a little snug -- and looking a little worn, too. Also, all my suits and sportcoats are dark colored or heavy tweed. I know -- I'm a real fashion plate.
I'll just be a run-of-the-mill wedding guest, related to the groom through marriage (that is, I will have no official function.) I just don't want to look like a troll or a substitute shop teacher. Help? Any first-hand advice or online resources greatly appreciated. Thanks.
Outdoor wedding in Florida next month. I've put on about 10 pounds recently, so all my dressy clothes are a little snug -- and looking a little worn, too. Also, all my suits and sportcoats are dark colored or heavy tweed. I know -- I'm a real fashion plate.
I'll just be a run-of-the-mill wedding guest, related to the groom through marriage (that is, I will have no official function.) I just don't want to look like a troll or a substitute shop teacher. Help? Any first-hand advice or online resources greatly appreciated. Thanks.
First of all - what the heck is wrong with dark tweed clothing? Hot for Florida, yeah, but not unfashionable, like you're implying.
If you're worried about the cost of buying something new, I've had great success buying new emergency outfits on eBay -- even for weddings. If the cost is not a factor, just get one new lighter-colored suit and be done with it.
And then, stop calling yourself "a fashion 'don't'" because you're not -- you're just someone who needs to get a new suit. They make a billion guys like you every day. Good luck.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:46 AM on January 23, 2012 [1 favorite]
If you're worried about the cost of buying something new, I've had great success buying new emergency outfits on eBay -- even for weddings. If the cost is not a factor, just get one new lighter-colored suit and be done with it.
And then, stop calling yourself "a fashion 'don't'" because you're not -- you're just someone who needs to get a new suit. They make a billion guys like you every day. Good luck.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:46 AM on January 23, 2012 [1 favorite]
Response by poster: invitation says wedding is at "four o'clock in the afternoon," at a state park. "Outdoor reception to follow." Hope that helps!
posted by Buffaload at 4:46 AM on January 23, 2012
posted by Buffaload at 4:46 AM on January 23, 2012
Response by poster: @Empress -- light colored suit? On eBay? Could it be that simple? Looking into it. Obviously, dressing up is a source of minor anxiety for me. Thanks for the pep talk too.
posted by Buffaload at 4:49 AM on January 23, 2012
posted by Buffaload at 4:49 AM on January 23, 2012
I dont' see why you can't wear a dark coloured suit. I recently wore a navy blue suit to an afternoon wedding. - if it starts at 4pm then the reception will be in he evening anyway. And its winter (or is it still summer in Florida).
Suit, simple shirt, white, off-white etc.. with a decent tie and you should be fine.
posted by mary8nne at 4:52 AM on January 23, 2012
Suit, simple shirt, white, off-white etc.. with a decent tie and you should be fine.
posted by mary8nne at 4:52 AM on January 23, 2012
I thought "dark colored suit" would just be too warm for Florida, but there's no FASHION rule against it, for the record.
Buffaload, the dark colors would actually be fine for evening. Navy blue would work quite well in particular. And yeah, you can find some incredible things on eBay. It's not a guarantee you'll find the perfect outfit, but if you're cash-poor it can be an option. But if you don't find anything -- seriously, just buy a suit at whatever place you can afford one. You'll be fine.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:55 AM on January 23, 2012
Buffaload, the dark colors would actually be fine for evening. Navy blue would work quite well in particular. And yeah, you can find some incredible things on eBay. It's not a guarantee you'll find the perfect outfit, but if you're cash-poor it can be an option. But if you don't find anything -- seriously, just buy a suit at whatever place you can afford one. You'll be fine.
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 4:55 AM on January 23, 2012
Is the invitation worded in the third person? What does it look like?
It's different if it's written in crayon and says "Jimmy and Jenny invite you to mommy and daddy's wedding at four o'clock in the afternoon at the park!1! Outdoor reception to follow." than if it's engraved and reads "Lord and Lady Muck request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter Sabrina Mulholland-jjones to Mr Arnold Judas Rimmer at the Bowling Green at Muck Park, etc etc."
That it's in the afternoon suggests that it's less formal. A dark grey suit and tie in an all-season wool will be absolutely ideal for everything up to and including Lord and Lady Muck, so that's what I think you should go for. If you don't already have a dark grey suit and tie that fit you, I strongly suggest you shell out for a new one because this is not the last time you'll need it. Try digging around thrift stores and taking your finds to a tailor for alterations.
posted by tel3path at 4:59 AM on January 23, 2012 [1 favorite]
It's different if it's written in crayon and says "Jimmy and Jenny invite you to mommy and daddy's wedding at four o'clock in the afternoon at the park!1! Outdoor reception to follow." than if it's engraved and reads "Lord and Lady Muck request the pleasure of your company at the marriage of their daughter Sabrina Mulholland-jjones to Mr Arnold Judas Rimmer at the Bowling Green at Muck Park, etc etc."
That it's in the afternoon suggests that it's less formal. A dark grey suit and tie in an all-season wool will be absolutely ideal for everything up to and including Lord and Lady Muck, so that's what I think you should go for. If you don't already have a dark grey suit and tie that fit you, I strongly suggest you shell out for a new one because this is not the last time you'll need it. Try digging around thrift stores and taking your finds to a tailor for alterations.
posted by tel3path at 4:59 AM on January 23, 2012 [1 favorite]
Also, do you have time to get a suit tailored to fit? Ie, if you buy a suit on eBay and the sleeves are too long, will you have time to fix it? As everyone says, fit is what makes even a cheaper suit look good.
Remember that a suit should fit as well as possible in the shoulders - that's the thing that is basically impossible to tailor. So make sure you know your current measurements - have a friend help you or go to a tailor and ask if they'll do it for $10 or something.
Also, if you are buying a suit on Ebay that is a known brand (like a used Brooks Brothers one or something) you can google things like "brooks brothers suit styleforum fit" and that will help you find discussions on...wait for it....styleforum, a bastion of incredible snobbery and bad politics that is none the less full of helpful advice about shoes and suits.
I second the "dark grey suit in an all season wool" thing. Remember that eccentricity in suits is to be deplored (unless it's subculturally appropriate for you, of course, or you have a Fashion Thing for eccentric suits) - so no topstitching or funniness about the vents or four-button moddery or nehru collars.
posted by Frowner at 6:18 AM on January 23, 2012 [1 favorite]
Remember that a suit should fit as well as possible in the shoulders - that's the thing that is basically impossible to tailor. So make sure you know your current measurements - have a friend help you or go to a tailor and ask if they'll do it for $10 or something.
Also, if you are buying a suit on Ebay that is a known brand (like a used Brooks Brothers one or something) you can google things like "brooks brothers suit styleforum fit" and that will help you find discussions on...wait for it....styleforum, a bastion of incredible snobbery and bad politics that is none the less full of helpful advice about shoes and suits.
I second the "dark grey suit in an all season wool" thing. Remember that eccentricity in suits is to be deplored (unless it's subculturally appropriate for you, of course, or you have a Fashion Thing for eccentric suits) - so no topstitching or funniness about the vents or four-button moddery or nehru collars.
posted by Frowner at 6:18 AM on January 23, 2012 [1 favorite]
We got my husband a dark grey suit at Penney's recently. On sale at 70% off. It's not too heavy and looks nice. Dress shirts from Burlington Coat Factory.
I've also seen guys wear slacks and shirt and tie to the wedding and remove the tie and jacket after the ceremony. Especially for outdoor events.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 6:50 AM on January 23, 2012
I've also seen guys wear slacks and shirt and tie to the wedding and remove the tie and jacket after the ceremony. Especially for outdoor events.
posted by Marie Mon Dieu at 6:50 AM on January 23, 2012
What part of Florida? There's a big difference between Orlando and Miami when it comes to what to wear to a wedding, even this time of year.
Find out if the groom is wearing a suit, or if he is going with slacks and guyabera. Either is correct in South Florida. Wear what the groom is wearing.
And yes, it is perfectly alright to call the bride or the groom, and find out without having to guess.
posted by halfbuckaroo at 7:19 AM on January 23, 2012
Find out if the groom is wearing a suit, or if he is going with slacks and guyabera. Either is correct in South Florida. Wear what the groom is wearing.
And yes, it is perfectly alright to call the bride or the groom, and find out without having to guess.
posted by halfbuckaroo at 7:19 AM on January 23, 2012
Where exactly in Florida is this wedding taking place? Depending on where you're at, outdoors in Florida in February isn't necessarily going to be too warm to wear a tweed jacket.
posted by saladin at 7:20 AM on January 23, 2012
posted by saladin at 7:20 AM on January 23, 2012
I'm a little uneasy about this suit business. A beach wedding in a Florida state park with and outdoor reception sounds very casual to me. I've seen several from a distance on the beaches of Destin, and I've never seen anyone in a suit, including the groom. I would ask what the groom and his groomsmen are wearing and go from there. If he's in a tux, then suit up. But they might be going very casual and you would feel kinda silly in a dark suit. Dress one step down from the wedding party and you'll be good to go.
posted by raisingsand at 8:42 AM on January 23, 2012
posted by raisingsand at 8:42 AM on January 23, 2012
If you have a decent pair of brown shoes, just buy some nice-fitting chinos to go with one of the darker jackets. Splits the difference nicely. Open-collared shirt with it (checked, gingham, whatever - something with colour) and you're good to go.
posted by fso at 10:49 AM on January 23, 2012
posted by fso at 10:49 AM on January 23, 2012
At all the weddings I have ever been to (regardless of climate), a mid-grey suit, white shirt and light blue patterned tie (for example) would be appropriate.
I have never been to a beach wedding. I imagine that a shirt and trousers would be appropriate (as would other things). The only problem is that in my circles anything other than a very casual wedding requires a jacket and tie. It's probably more foolproof to slightly overdress and then if necessary/possible lose the tie and/or jacket than the other way around.
posted by plonkee at 11:07 AM on January 23, 2012
I have never been to a beach wedding. I imagine that a shirt and trousers would be appropriate (as would other things). The only problem is that in my circles anything other than a very casual wedding requires a jacket and tie. It's probably more foolproof to slightly overdress and then if necessary/possible lose the tie and/or jacket than the other way around.
posted by plonkee at 11:07 AM on January 23, 2012
If you are unsure of whether the beach part of the beach wedding will entail people running about in linen poet shirts and jeans or if a suit is in order, get a pair of dress khakis (no pleats, please), a white oxford, a tie, and a navy blazer. Wear shoes and socks.
Remove items and untuck as necessary for a less formal look. Toss sandals in the car if you feel the need.
posted by oflinkey at 2:20 PM on January 23, 2012
Remove items and untuck as necessary for a less formal look. Toss sandals in the car if you feel the need.
posted by oflinkey at 2:20 PM on January 23, 2012
This thread is closed to new comments.
How is the invitation worded? We need to know level of formality and time of day.
posted by tel3path at 4:43 AM on January 23, 2012