What can I do about a situation my negligent recommender placed me in?
January 13, 2011 7:04 PM Subscribe
I am applying to graduate school, and have been gently nudging a former colleague for their letter of recommendation that they agreed to write on my behalf. For the past month and half I have routinely followed up, politely, and empathized with his circumstances as to why he could not get to writing it. He told me repeatedly it would be written. Now my application is incomplete and it is due tomorrow.
Allow me to further explain that I told him the date I needed it by last week. Furthermore, I said if he is uncomfortable or unable to write, it's ok — I will find someone else. I stated this twice. I also offered to pick it up myself to save him time and energy.
Two days ago he told me he sent the letter to me via express mail — I still have not received it.
As of now, I sent him an email stating I don't have it.
Right now I'm livid, and I don't know what to do about this situation. I understand people procrastinate, but from where I stand this is beyond that point.
What would you do if you were in my shoes right now?
I figure I should do this much:
1) Contact the school, and ask what their policy is on late recommendation letters
2) Possibly find someone else for a last minute letter of recommendation (I don't know if I can pull this off anyway considering the freelance nature of my work, and I already have two recommenders who are my go-to people)
What else?
Allow me to further explain that I told him the date I needed it by last week. Furthermore, I said if he is uncomfortable or unable to write, it's ok — I will find someone else. I stated this twice. I also offered to pick it up myself to save him time and energy.
Two days ago he told me he sent the letter to me via express mail — I still have not received it.
As of now, I sent him an email stating I don't have it.
Right now I'm livid, and I don't know what to do about this situation. I understand people procrastinate, but from where I stand this is beyond that point.
What would you do if you were in my shoes right now?
I figure I should do this much:
1) Contact the school, and ask what their policy is on late recommendation letters
2) Possibly find someone else for a last minute letter of recommendation (I don't know if I can pull this off anyway considering the freelance nature of my work, and I already have two recommenders who are my go-to people)
What else?
Make a copy of the application, and turn it in as is. If you need to submit it again with the letter, so be it.
Call the school like you said, but you don't have to go into detail. "There have been complications, Can I send the letter in separately?"
Find someone else - anyone else. Old boss, scout troop leader, friend of the family, that guy you did that favor, someone you could do a favor for.
Good luck!
posted by jander03 at 7:19 PM on January 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
Call the school like you said, but you don't have to go into detail. "There have been complications, Can I send the letter in separately?"
Find someone else - anyone else. Old boss, scout troop leader, friend of the family, that guy you did that favor, someone you could do a favor for.
Good luck!
posted by jander03 at 7:19 PM on January 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
Many places will accept a letter of rec via email. They will be even happier to get a paper copy later in the mail.
Do ask the guy if he needs you to write it for him. This happens a lot more than you think it does. Also, if he express mailed it, I'm sure he won't mind giving you the tracking number?
posted by sciencegeek at 7:29 PM on January 13, 2011
Do ask the guy if he needs you to write it for him. This happens a lot more than you think it does. Also, if he express mailed it, I'm sure he won't mind giving you the tracking number?
posted by sciencegeek at 7:29 PM on January 13, 2011
I did graduate admissions for several years. We generally did not hold applicants responsible if their recommenders failed to write a letter, or if it came in late, unless it was clear that it was the applicant's fault (e.g. they asked for the letter just before it was due, or they didn't *ask*). I'd write to the director of graduate admissions in the program(s) to which you're applying. Explain the situation. Be polite and nonjudgmental by sticking to the facts: you asked X to write a letter on date Y and said that it was due by date Z. When you contacted X, they said that the letter had been sent but you have not received it. Give them X's contact information. I can assure you that this is far from the first time they will have encountered this problem. Unless this is your only letter of recommendation, it should not be a big problem.
Good luck!
posted by brianogilvie at 7:31 PM on January 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
Good luck!
posted by brianogilvie at 7:31 PM on January 13, 2011 [2 favorites]
Yes, call or email the graduate program / school and find out exactly what they mean by a complete application on the due date.
My program, for instance, wants the materials from the applicant by the due date but will accept things not directly in the student's control (transcripts, test scores, and letters of recommendation) for a certain amount of time after the due date. And as sciencegeek says, I often suggest that late letters come directly to me in email from the recommender. This seems to help with the recommenders who have been dragging their feet.
posted by Squeak Attack at 7:34 PM on January 13, 2011
My program, for instance, wants the materials from the applicant by the due date but will accept things not directly in the student's control (transcripts, test scores, and letters of recommendation) for a certain amount of time after the due date. And as sciencegeek says, I often suggest that late letters come directly to me in email from the recommender. This seems to help with the recommenders who have been dragging their feet.
posted by Squeak Attack at 7:34 PM on January 13, 2011
Send the application in by the deadline regardless of whether you have the recommendation letter or not. In my experience, schools can be fairly lenient about this.
In the meantime, ask this person for the tracking number -- tell him you want to check where exactly it is, and when it might get to you, so that you can make an informed decision on whether to ask the school for an extension.
posted by prenominal at 7:35 PM on January 13, 2011
In the meantime, ask this person for the tracking number -- tell him you want to check where exactly it is, and when it might get to you, so that you can make an informed decision on whether to ask the school for an extension.
posted by prenominal at 7:35 PM on January 13, 2011
This happened to me. I did as others said above- I immediately called the admissions offices and explained what happened. They reassured me that the due date is generally for the materials coming from the student (the recommenders submitted separately online), and that they were understanding about late letters. I ended up getting in to the programs.
posted by emilyd22222 at 7:38 PM on January 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
posted by emilyd22222 at 7:38 PM on January 13, 2011 [1 favorite]
On my graduate admissions committee we routinely evaluate and accept students for whom we have received only two of the three required letters. It's understood that some portions of this process are out of the applicants control. Sometimes we will contact the letter writers ourselves if we really think we need the input to reach a fair decision. Good luck.
posted by u2604ab at 8:28 PM on January 13, 2011
posted by u2604ab at 8:28 PM on January 13, 2011
Just want to chime in and say I was in your exact same situation until, oh, about this time yesterday. The letter hadn't come in, I'd asked for it months ago, and as the deadlines loomed, I went well outside my comfort zone with the reminders. Pleasant reassurances were made many a time, the days went on by, and I tried to hide my panic and frustration as 3 of my deadlines passed and nothing got done. I even considered contacting a friend of my grandmother's who lives in the same city as the recommender and asking her to pay him a visit at his house!
Well, for what it's worth, out of my sample size of 7 schools, 6 of them accept late letters, with the grace period ranging from 1 to 2 weeks. One even considers 2 letters to be a "complete" application, even though it's not officially stated anywhere.
So, very likely you can relax a little bit. Good luck though!! I wish I could wrap my mind around why people do this.
posted by geneva uswazi at 9:59 PM on January 13, 2011
Well, for what it's worth, out of my sample size of 7 schools, 6 of them accept late letters, with the grace period ranging from 1 to 2 weeks. One even considers 2 letters to be a "complete" application, even though it's not officially stated anywhere.
So, very likely you can relax a little bit. Good luck though!! I wish I could wrap my mind around why people do this.
posted by geneva uswazi at 9:59 PM on January 13, 2011
Response by poster: Thanks for the suggestions so far everyone. Hearing your stories has allayed a good portion of my anxiety.
I'm calling the admissions office today to see if they will accept 2 letters instead of the standard 3 — if they don't, it's time to search for my third recommender.
posted by helios410 at 5:48 AM on January 14, 2011
I'm calling the admissions office today to see if they will accept 2 letters instead of the standard 3 — if they don't, it's time to search for my third recommender.
posted by helios410 at 5:48 AM on January 14, 2011
What is important, however, is that they will be forced to consider your application without one more something that should be making you look awesome. Interviews generally happen in late February early march and they generally give you at least a months worth of warning, this means they'll likely be making that first big round of winnowing in the next few weeks.
"I'm calling the admissions office today to see if they will accept 2 letters instead of the standard 3 — if they don't, it's time to search for my third recommender."
I would recommend doing this anyway. Even if it is just a rudimentary recommendation it shows that someone likes you enough to do you a favor, that you can network well enough to have four recommenders, that you have more things that are awesome about you than they've asked for, and now you have three or four people saying good things about you instead of two or three.
This happened to me too, its really common.
posted by Blasdelb at 6:44 AM on January 14, 2011
"I'm calling the admissions office today to see if they will accept 2 letters instead of the standard 3 — if they don't, it's time to search for my third recommender."
I would recommend doing this anyway. Even if it is just a rudimentary recommendation it shows that someone likes you enough to do you a favor, that you can network well enough to have four recommenders, that you have more things that are awesome about you than they've asked for, and now you have three or four people saying good things about you instead of two or three.
This happened to me too, its really common.
posted by Blasdelb at 6:44 AM on January 14, 2011
I did not get into a graduate program because one of my letter writers just didn't write a recommendation for me. She told me that she had, and that she had sent it, and that it must have gotten lost in the mail, which I later found out was a falsehood. I think you should send it your application on time and get another letter from someone else! You can call the admissions office to ask them what they would recommend, too. It's not an uncommon situation.
It really, really sucks to have to wait another year to begin your program because of someone else's mistake. Be proactive and take steps to make sure you have all your materials, even if other people aren't on the ball.
posted by zoetrope at 7:08 AM on January 14, 2011
It really, really sucks to have to wait another year to begin your program because of someone else's mistake. Be proactive and take steps to make sure you have all your materials, even if other people aren't on the ball.
posted by zoetrope at 7:08 AM on January 14, 2011
I remember being in a similar situation with my letters, and on the application I wrote something about the letters arriving in the post via the recommenders themselves. They probably showed up a few days after my application got there, but since I got accepted anyway I don't think it was much of an issue.
posted by _superconductor at 1:31 PM on January 14, 2011
posted by _superconductor at 1:31 PM on January 14, 2011
This thread is closed to new comments.
And also, get someone else last minute as insurance against Plan A not working out.
posted by Kololo at 7:14 PM on January 13, 2011 [6 favorites]