Abbott and Costello
July 31, 2010 10:20 PM   Subscribe

Help me come up with nicknames for my two boys; the 2 year old is a fiery, crazy redhead and the 3 1/2 year old is smart and sensitive.

I'm looking for nicknames for each of them but also both of them collectively. Kind of like the Three Musketeers where each of them also gets a name, except there's only two of them.

I have something on the tip of my tongue but I just can't think of it - I'm thinking pop-culture, brothers, crime fighting, cool, hip, dorky or something similar (or all of the above).

Anyway, get your creative brains in gear and help me out, thanks in advance!
posted by micklaw to Pets & Animals (47 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
MeFi's own asavage calls his two Thing One and Thing Two in public, to avoid exposing them to the spotlight.
posted by fairytale of los angeles at 10:25 PM on July 31, 2010 [2 favorites]

Best answer: You say that one's wacky, and one's smart?

Here you go!

They even have a theme song!
posted by Asparagirl at 10:29 PM on July 31, 2010 [3 favorites]

Felix for the rambunctious one, Poindexter for the intelligent one. Obscure cartoon reference lurks within.
posted by motown missile at 10:32 PM on July 31, 2010

We named our turtles Big Guy and Little Guy.
posted by ladypants at 10:35 PM on July 31, 2010

Speaking of Poindexter, in an episode of Family Ties, either Alex or Andy (I forget which) named the family goldfish Spiro and Agnew.
posted by ladypants at 10:38 PM on July 31, 2010

Orville and Wilbur (the Wright Brothers)?
posted by Hardcore Poser at 10:42 PM on July 31, 2010

Do your boys want nicknames?
posted by Bruce H. at 10:42 PM on July 31, 2010 [16 favorites]

flame & citron.
posted by j at 10:46 PM on July 31, 2010 [3 favorites]

Best answer: Bender and Fry!
posted by MiG at 10:52 PM on July 31, 2010

Maroon and Normal.
posted by BostonTerrier at 10:52 PM on July 31, 2010

Again assuming that it's for some sort of "keep them off your blog audience's radar" purpose, there's always Dammit and Jesus Christ.
posted by fairytale of los angeles at 10:52 PM on July 31, 2010

Starsky and Hutch?
Jake and Elwood?
posted by corey flood at 11:00 PM on July 31, 2010

Goofus and Gallant.
posted by elsietheeel at 11:01 PM on July 31, 2010 [4 favorites]

Nicknames come on their own. They can't be asked for or put upon ones self. It's a little early yet, they'll fall into their own nicknames soon enough.
posted by sanka at 11:23 PM on July 31, 2010 [13 favorites]

Darcy and Wickham?
posted by mynameisluka at 11:25 PM on July 31, 2010 [1 favorite]

Nothing's worse than a forced nickname. Give it time and you'll come up with something naturally.
posted by AzzaMcKazza at 11:31 PM on July 31, 2010 [10 favorites]

Ferrari for the red one

JohnJohn for the other
posted by parmanparman at 11:58 PM on July 31, 2010

Darrel and Darrel.
posted by Back to you, Jim. at 12:22 AM on August 1, 2010 [2 favorites]

Sassafras and Jonquil.
posted by boo_radley at 12:51 AM on August 1, 2010

Tangerine Dream

Tango (because it takes two, and breaks into tang and o, which have connotations of color and sharp flavor coupled with the mystery and coolness of zero).

(Tough question!)
posted by jamjam at 1:21 AM on August 1, 2010

Best answer: Calvin and Hobbes?
Adam and Jamie (aka the MythBusters)?

I like the Goofus and Gallant suggestion.

But I agree on the forced nickname thing. Although it can still be a funny thing to share with others ("I went on Ask Metafilter and asked for nicknames for them, and the funniest one was ___.")
posted by TheSecretDecoderRing at 1:27 AM on August 1, 2010 [1 favorite]

Snap, Crackle & Pop (Snap for the smart one, and Crackle & Pop for the redhead)

(and then collectively, you have Rice Krispies)
posted by blue_wardrobe at 1:38 AM on August 1, 2010

The traditional Jewish ones are "the doctor" and "the lawyer". You're welcome.
posted by Joe in Australia at 2:14 AM on August 1, 2010 [5 favorites]

Your question suggests "The Nameless Two". You can split this on demand, as in "Nameless One, do the dishes; Nameless Other One, mow the lawn." They'll be grateful.
[And even I agree on the forced nickname thing. I know some people who have no nickname; it's their personality that makes this (not) happen, at least that's what I came to believe]
posted by Namlit at 2:17 AM on August 1, 2010

Bud Light and Bud Lime. (You posted a question about your kids to "Pets and Animals?")
posted by deep thought sunstar at 2:22 AM on August 1, 2010 [3 favorites]

I guess one's a pet and one's an animal? Hey, there's your nicknames right there. "Pet 'n Animal! Thursdays at 9/8 central on CBS!"
posted by TheSecretDecoderRing at 2:26 AM on August 1, 2010 [2 favorites]

The Venture Brothers? That would be a good collective nickname.
posted by christinetheslp at 3:18 AM on August 1, 2010

I guess Ron and Hermione is out...
posted by polyglot at 3:24 AM on August 1, 2010

Fire and Ice.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 4:11 AM on August 1, 2010

My daughter Grace is Grapes (I have no idea why, she likes grapes but not that much), and my son Dane is Draino (no idea why, either, he truly isn't a toxic drain cleaner). They just... I dunno... happened.

Let them come naturally. (We're currently trying to forget the nicknames that mum's ex-boyfriend started calling them: Gracie-Lou and Little Dude. Damned cute nicknames though, and they developed naturally as their friendship with mum's boyfriend grew stronger.)

I also like transposed first-letters: Grace Lucinda is Lace Grucinda on occasion. It might be an Aussie rhyming slang thing, but I like it.

Let their nicknames develop naturally. Someone will eventually start calling them something silly and funny and cute and it will stick because it suits them, because it's right.
posted by malibustacey9999 at 4:11 AM on August 1, 2010

Emo and the Ginger Ninja
posted by anemone at 4:18 AM on August 1, 2010

If these nicknames are for your blog or otherwise to be used about them, but not in front of them, fine. But I'm a little concerned, especially if they are to know about these names, that you're putting them in boxes at such a young age. I'm a grown-ass adult, and I still don't like the fact that family members think of me as "the brainy one" and my sister as "the athletic one." It always made me feel as though I couldn't do certain things, because they weren't in my purported area of expertise.

If you label your three-year-old "the smart one," your two-year-old is going to hear that he's not smart. If you label your two-year-old "the crazy one," your three-year-old may not feel free to fully express his zany, wacky side. If you can try to stop thinking about them in this way, regardless of what you decide to call them to others, it'll be better for them.
posted by decathecting at 4:35 AM on August 1, 2010 [20 favorites]

As per decathecting (who is spot-on about the pretty little boxes at young ages), there's nothing redheads love more than to be stereotyped based on redhead stereotypes, as if nobody can bother to learn who they are. And there's super nothing redheads love more than when their parents refer to them as "the redheaded one" as if that defines them. The non-redheaded kids get personalities, the redheads are just "redheaded." Awesome.
posted by Eyebrows McGee at 4:43 AM on August 1, 2010 [7 favorites]

The non-redheaded kids get personalities, the redheads are just "redheaded."

And "fiery" and "crazy." (Would you have said these things about him if he didn't have red hair?)

Calling one of your sons the "smart" one is a problem. I don't even agree with the above comment that it would be OK as long as it stays on your blog or something. Aside from the fact that your kids will one day be old enough to read your blog or anything you write online, this message will get through to them one way or another. If you go around routinely calling one of them the "smart" one and the other the "crazy" one -- even when you think you're only talking to adults -- the kids will pick up on it.

Oh, as far as your question? Let the nicknames come up in the natural course of things from people who know them. It's not really something AskMetafilter can offer you based on a thumbnail description of their personalities. How can we come up with nicknames when we don't even know their real names?!
posted by Jaltcoh at 5:17 AM on August 1, 2010 [8 favorites]

Ranger or the outgoing one, MacGyver, for the thinker. The problem with paired names from pop culture is that there's a lot of negative baggage. If you're going to assign nicknames, they should be as positive as possible.
posted by theora55 at 5:57 AM on August 1, 2010

Yeah, I hate nicknames. Like the question a few days back about people resisting changes they see in others, role-based nicknames will tend to ever so slightly stress out a kid who is trying to explore his own identity and maybe doesn't want to be Little Fauntleroy anymore. You should seek to box your kids in as little as possible.

Also, don't give your red headed kid a nickname. He will get enough of that the rest of his life. I spent a year of my life being called "Danny" [Bonaduce]. The only acceptable nickname for a redhead is "Red", and only then if that is what his friends start calling him.

(PS- I would have killed my parents in their sleep if they started calling me Poindexter.)
posted by gjc at 6:42 AM on August 1, 2010 [2 favorites]

Yeah, let the nicknames evolve naturally. And I nth the suggestion to avoid pigeonholing your kids this early. My brothers are 'the natural engineer' and the 'funny one.' Last week I refurbished an ancient freeze-dryer for my lab out of random spare parts and duct tape. I also remember winning some kind of humorous essay contest, and my parents didn't know what to do with the information. Did not compute. My brothers, in turn, have probably deeply appreciated the label of 'smart one,' what with their each having highly challenging, intellectually demanding work, and their respective graduate degrees.

And although I am not myself a redhead, let me tell you how excited one of my dearest friends is every time his mom refers to 'oh we used to just look for The Redhead any time we had to find X in a crowd.' B Ecause you can hear the capitalization in her tone, and there's just a little flash of resentment on his face every time she says it.
posted by Uniformitarianism Now! at 6:56 AM on August 1, 2010

all typos courtesy of my smartphone.
posted by Uniformitarianism Now! at 6:58 AM on August 1, 2010

The First One, and The Second One.

Boy and Other Boy. (Interchangeable!)

You and You Too.

I really like the idea of superhero duo nicknames.
posted by SuperSquirrel at 7:14 AM on August 1, 2010

If you're coming up with nicknames as pseudonyms for a blog, or as a funny way to refer to them "Calvin and Hobbes are out with their dad today" that's cool. But as for a nickname that you actually call them, just let those develop.
posted by radioamy at 7:21 AM on August 1, 2010 [1 favorite]

Are these nicknames for your pets, or for human beings?
posted by Sara C. at 7:50 AM on August 1, 2010 [4 favorites]

As "the smart one," I think this is a terrible idea if you will actually call them these nicknames, even if they're subtle. Nothing like being pigeonholed as a boring nerd as a small child. Let nicknames develop naturally, and don't base them on some traits you think they have.
posted by elpea at 8:25 AM on August 1, 2010 [1 favorite]

Are these nicknames for your pets, or for human beings?

It was filed in the "pets & animals" category, but they're called "boys," so I'm thinking they're human beings. Humans are animals.
posted by Jaltcoh at 9:00 AM on August 1, 2010

I cal my little brother "Little Monster" and he likes it. Little Monster and Big Monster, then? Of course, I agree, unless these are for internet psuedonyms or something, you should wait until the nicknames come naturally based on the kid's preferences - for instance, the lil monster is also called "Meatball".
posted by estlin at 9:49 AM on August 1, 2010

Poo-breath and Butt-sniffer.

Unless...are you talking about humans?
posted by The ____ of Justice at 11:06 AM on August 1, 2010

Shaggy and Scooby

I just have to agree with all of the above who say that nicknames can be really harmful. On my blogs and Facebook I just refer to my kids as the older one or the younger one or some variation of that.
posted by TooFewShoes at 2:13 PM on August 1, 2010 [1 favorite]

Best answer: Shaggy and Scooby

And the collective nickname would be "Those Meddling Kids."
posted by SuperSquirrel at 4:54 PM on August 1, 2010 [1 favorite]

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