Lonely dog & anxious neighbor
November 3, 2008 5:41 PM Subscribe
My upstairs neighbors, a young-ish couple, have a puppy. I believe they both work full-time jobs and therefore are away a lot of the day. They usually leave around 7 am and get home around 5 (they are pretty loud, so I know their routines). Often, they leave the dog in the evening - after a full day of being alone. I don't know if they have a dog-walker come in during the day (I really hope so).
The dog cries and barks when alone (understandable) and honestly, I feel really sorry for it. I am a dog lover, but do not have a dog of my own as I know I could not give it the time it would need. My question is: how can I deal with my own feelings of sadness for this dog? I am annoyed by the barking, but honestly, am more annoyed with the owners. I don't know what to do.
they may have no idea their dog is unhappy. i like jamaro's suggestion--it alerts to the problem and offers a solution (and hey, you'll get a little exercise out of the deal).
if you don't want to offer to walk to dog, an anonymous note may be the way to go, to the effect of, "i don't know if you are aware of this, but your dog whines and cries whenever you are away. is there any way you could arrange to get a dog walker or take it to doggy day care? it distresses me to hear the poor guy so obviously unhappy. i wish i had time to offer my assistance, but i don't. i am sure that you love your dog very much and will be upset to hear that he needs more attention than you can give him, so i hope you will understand why i wish to preserve good will among my neighbors by keeping this anonymous. regards, a neighbor."
posted by thinkingwoman at 6:12 PM on November 3, 2008 [3 favorites]
if you don't want to offer to walk to dog, an anonymous note may be the way to go, to the effect of, "i don't know if you are aware of this, but your dog whines and cries whenever you are away. is there any way you could arrange to get a dog walker or take it to doggy day care? it distresses me to hear the poor guy so obviously unhappy. i wish i had time to offer my assistance, but i don't. i am sure that you love your dog very much and will be upset to hear that he needs more attention than you can give him, so i hope you will understand why i wish to preserve good will among my neighbors by keeping this anonymous. regards, a neighbor."
posted by thinkingwoman at 6:12 PM on November 3, 2008 [3 favorites]
How bad is the barking? A dog who barks a few times when there is a noise, that's normal. Possibly, the dog has selection of toys -when you hear barking, it's wreaking havoc on a Booda bone and having a gay ol' time.
If the pup is just barking barking barking barking, then it would be best all around if you, the kindly neighbor, talked to the owners before someone unkindly files a complaint.
As far as being home alone from 7 - 5, hard to say. Not sure what you mean by "puppy"? For a baby dog of a certain age, without puppy pads or a litter box, that might be too long. But maybe this dog is older, or maybe this dog has puppy pads or is litter-box trained. Zillions of dogs are home alone all day, and nonetheless have happy lives. (I myself am stuck at work for hours all day, and yet have a happy life.)
Why not just have a friendly chat with the owners, express some interest in their dog, and see if you don't learn enough about the dog's life to feel better? Find out what they do with pup when they are home, how they spend weekends, what kind of training it's had - just get a feel for the dog's life.
posted by Lesser Shrew at 6:13 PM on November 3, 2008
If the pup is just barking barking barking barking, then it would be best all around if you, the kindly neighbor, talked to the owners before someone unkindly files a complaint.
As far as being home alone from 7 - 5, hard to say. Not sure what you mean by "puppy"? For a baby dog of a certain age, without puppy pads or a litter box, that might be too long. But maybe this dog is older, or maybe this dog has puppy pads or is litter-box trained. Zillions of dogs are home alone all day, and nonetheless have happy lives. (I myself am stuck at work for hours all day, and yet have a happy life.)
Why not just have a friendly chat with the owners, express some interest in their dog, and see if you don't learn enough about the dog's life to feel better? Find out what they do with pup when they are home, how they spend weekends, what kind of training it's had - just get a feel for the dog's life.
posted by Lesser Shrew at 6:13 PM on November 3, 2008
Usually people don't know the dog is barking when they're not home. A polite note or conversation alerting them to this might help a lot.
posted by Riverine at 6:30 PM on November 3, 2008
posted by Riverine at 6:30 PM on November 3, 2008
I was really waiting for this question to end with "How can I ask my neighbors if I can walk their dog without sounding like a weirdo?"
But Mattdidthat did it.
Do that.
posted by rokusan at 7:14 PM on November 3, 2008
But Mattdidthat did it.
Do that.
posted by rokusan at 7:14 PM on November 3, 2008
Our neighbour (whom we knew reasonably well) left his new puppy alone during the workday, so my wife offered to bring it to our house for an hour or so in the afternoons. It worked out well, except for a few poop/pee accidents and the puppy got more used to being lone as it got older.
posted by bonobothegreat at 10:26 PM on November 3, 2008
posted by bonobothegreat at 10:26 PM on November 3, 2008
Buy them The Weekend Dog. Dogs do not actually need constant attention and can be trained to spend the day alone, especially if they are crated. I'd be very concerned if the dog lived in an apartment and was only getting short walks of necessity late at night, though. Walking is essential to socializing dogs properly.
posted by dhartung at 11:39 PM on November 3, 2008
posted by dhartung at 11:39 PM on November 3, 2008
nthing the suggestion that you fill the void in this puppy's life. Offer to play with him, walk him, puppy sit - whatever it takes. I'd also add some blurb - tactfully - that what they're doing pretty much borders on the criteria of animal cruelty.
posted by watercarrier at 2:07 AM on November 4, 2008
posted by watercarrier at 2:07 AM on November 4, 2008
I wouldn't mention the animal cruelty thing. Just do the offer-to-doggy-sit thing. It's win-win-win.
posted by flabdablet at 2:49 AM on November 4, 2008
posted by flabdablet at 2:49 AM on November 4, 2008
Well, they obviously don't know that it's cruel behavior. What if they decide to get another dog and do the same thing to him/her down the line? Unless people are told - educated - call it what you will - they'll keep repeating negative behavior. It could simply be a matter of ignorance. Ask for their email - I have no problem sending them an eye opener on the subject.
posted by watercarrier at 3:17 AM on November 4, 2008
posted by watercarrier at 3:17 AM on November 4, 2008
N-thing "offer to help." If you love dogs, but can't have your own for whatever reasons, the greatest thing is to be able to play with one without the responsibility of owning it. Before we moved, my wife and I had a great time walking a disabled neighbor's dog-- it became a real highlight of our day, gave us a chance to exercise and unwind, the dog was happy, and so was our neighbor.
posted by Rykey at 3:54 AM on November 4, 2008
posted by Rykey at 3:54 AM on November 4, 2008
This thread is closed to new comments.
posted by Geckwoistmeinauto at 6:01 PM on November 3, 2008