How to avoid crating dogs while I work
February 5, 2012 3:31 AM Subscribe
I need help either alleviating my guilt or discovering a solution for how to give my dogs the best life I can while I also maintain a full-time job.
I decided in the past few days that I could no longer live in an abusive relationship and am coming to terms with the loss, sadness, and everything else that accompanies the realization that a relationship you'd hoped for simply is not to be.
Before I can even consider what all this means for me, I need to know how this change will have the least effect on my dogs, who mean the world to me.
Before, my boyfriend worked part time and was at home caring for our dogs before he went to work, walking, taking to the park, etc. It meant so much to me because they were getting exercise and good, positive stimulation. And when I got home in the afternoons I could care for them.
My dogs are working dogs who aren't the dog park, doggy day care kind of dogs, and I'm feeling so bad that their lives might involve them being crated for 8 hours a day. They are middle-aged dogs, so it isn't as though they are as rambunctious as when they were pups, but I just don't want to give them this kind of life.
If anyone has thoughts, I'd welcome them.
I decided in the past few days that I could no longer live in an abusive relationship and am coming to terms with the loss, sadness, and everything else that accompanies the realization that a relationship you'd hoped for simply is not to be.
Before I can even consider what all this means for me, I need to know how this change will have the least effect on my dogs, who mean the world to me.
Before, my boyfriend worked part time and was at home caring for our dogs before he went to work, walking, taking to the park, etc. It meant so much to me because they were getting exercise and good, positive stimulation. And when I got home in the afternoons I could care for them.
My dogs are working dogs who aren't the dog park, doggy day care kind of dogs, and I'm feeling so bad that their lives might involve them being crated for 8 hours a day. They are middle-aged dogs, so it isn't as though they are as rambunctious as when they were pups, but I just don't want to give them this kind of life.
If anyone has thoughts, I'd welcome them.
I am so glad you are making this decision, both for yourself and for your dogs. Living in a household that's abusive is stressful for dogs, so know you're making the best decision both for yourself and your canine pals.
One of the wonderful gifts of dogs is that they do not live lives of regret. They will not be sitting there think "Geeze why didn't we go to the park today?" but rather "YAY MOM IS HOME!" Also note that "working dog" is an ability not a mandate. A Great Dane is a working breed, but GD are pretty much the world's laziest, most famous couch potatoes. They're happy to do a job if you give them one, but they are just as happy to sleep on the couch all day (and many urban GDs live their whole happy lives this way.) You can keep your dogs happy by giving them domestic tasks, by asking them to carry items on walks, by doing weekend agility training, and by doing short obedience training stints at home so they can learn new skills.
I don't know why you think your dogs are not appropriate for doggy day care if you're lucky enough for that to even be an option where you are. It provides exercise and the stimulation of new people, other dogs and new routines. Still, if 8 hours is too long, at least consider a dog walker to break up their day and get them out more.
posted by DarlingBri at 3:45 AM on February 5, 2012
One of the wonderful gifts of dogs is that they do not live lives of regret. They will not be sitting there think "Geeze why didn't we go to the park today?" but rather "YAY MOM IS HOME!" Also note that "working dog" is an ability not a mandate. A Great Dane is a working breed, but GD are pretty much the world's laziest, most famous couch potatoes. They're happy to do a job if you give them one, but they are just as happy to sleep on the couch all day (and many urban GDs live their whole happy lives this way.) You can keep your dogs happy by giving them domestic tasks, by asking them to carry items on walks, by doing weekend agility training, and by doing short obedience training stints at home so they can learn new skills.
I don't know why you think your dogs are not appropriate for doggy day care if you're lucky enough for that to even be an option where you are. It provides exercise and the stimulation of new people, other dogs and new routines. Still, if 8 hours is too long, at least consider a dog walker to break up their day and get them out more.
posted by DarlingBri at 3:45 AM on February 5, 2012
My dog is a 6 year old sheltie/american eskimo mix, so he has working dog in him. 10 months ago I accepted a new job in a new city and I was concerned about how some very drastic changes were going to bother my dog.
For the previous two years I had either worked from home or been able to bring my dog into the office with me every single day. He had lots of time to run around, go in and out, have affection from me, etc. Now I was moving to an apartment, gone 10-12 hours at a time.
I have never crated my dog, and at my old house he had free run at all times. I was nervous about him in the apartment, getting bored and destructive or having an accident, so I gated him in the kitchen. I hated doing this. After 3 days of him going all day without any accidents I gave him free run of the apartment. Came home after 10 hours and everything was fine. It has now been 10 months and still no problems.
He gets at least 3 walks a day - first thing in the morning when we wake up, as soon as I walk in the door at night and once right before going to bed. On the weekends I try to take him to additional places like Metroparks, pet stores, etc so he has a chance to experience more than just the sights and scents at the apartment complex.
He appears to be totally happy. He had no personality change from his old life to his new life.
All of this is to say - you make the right decisions for you and your life and the dogs will be happy to come along for the ride. They love you, they are lucky to have you and it is not too hard to fit in 3 walks during the day.
Good luck!
posted by prettymightyflighty at 4:23 AM on February 5, 2012 [4 favorites]
For the previous two years I had either worked from home or been able to bring my dog into the office with me every single day. He had lots of time to run around, go in and out, have affection from me, etc. Now I was moving to an apartment, gone 10-12 hours at a time.
I have never crated my dog, and at my old house he had free run at all times. I was nervous about him in the apartment, getting bored and destructive or having an accident, so I gated him in the kitchen. I hated doing this. After 3 days of him going all day without any accidents I gave him free run of the apartment. Came home after 10 hours and everything was fine. It has now been 10 months and still no problems.
He gets at least 3 walks a day - first thing in the morning when we wake up, as soon as I walk in the door at night and once right before going to bed. On the weekends I try to take him to additional places like Metroparks, pet stores, etc so he has a chance to experience more than just the sights and scents at the apartment complex.
He appears to be totally happy. He had no personality change from his old life to his new life.
All of this is to say - you make the right decisions for you and your life and the dogs will be happy to come along for the ride. They love you, they are lucky to have you and it is not too hard to fit in 3 walks during the day.
Good luck!
posted by prettymightyflighty at 4:23 AM on February 5, 2012 [4 favorites]
You are not the only dog owner who works full time (I'm one too). Lots of exercise on a regular basis (dogwalker at lunch), and take up a class with the dogs (agility is loads of fun and most dogs love it), it will get you out and about and give the dogs your undivided attention for at least an hour a week each (mental stimulation is just as important as physical exercise). Failing that, at least clicker train a trick every week. Doggy daycare is really not suitable for every dog, it's very popular and many dogs enjoy it, but not all dogs are candidates, so don't feel bad. If they MUST be crated (although middle aged dogs are often just fine uncrated, but you know best), get them some challenging puzzle games, feed them their breakfasts out of those (if it's safe to do so, not all puzzle games are suitable for this), or Buster Cubes, or frozen stuffed Kongs. By the time they've teased their breakfasts out of those, they'll nap.
posted by biscotti at 6:26 AM on February 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
posted by biscotti at 6:26 AM on February 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
You are anthropomorphizing your feelings about crates onto the dogs. They don't feel the same way. Dogs are going to sleep 80% of the day anyway, they really don't care if it's in a crate. 8 hours is pushing the upper limit on how long a dog should be crated for though. Could you hire a dog walking service to visit once per day around noon to take the dogs for a walk?
posted by COD at 6:40 AM on February 5, 2012
posted by COD at 6:40 AM on February 5, 2012
Midday dog walker with dogs wearing weighted backpacks?
Extra mental stimulation/training when you are home?
Do they have to be crated? They will keep each other company.
posted by whalebreath at 7:55 AM on February 5, 2012
Extra mental stimulation/training when you are home?
Do they have to be crated? They will keep each other company.
posted by whalebreath at 7:55 AM on February 5, 2012
Not all dog day cares are the same. If you live in a large metro area with multiple options, check some out. We send our dog (on the 3 days/week that I don't work from home) to a dog day care that's focused on pack walking. We preferred this to the day cares that just sort of give the dogs a large, fixed environment to play in all day.
Our pup comes home happy every day and wiped out some days, and the benefits to her socialization have been incredible. In fact, it may be that what your dogs need to be "doggy day care kind of dogs" is a week in doggy day care. Many members of the pack wear backpacks or have other little enhancements that make the walks more into something the dog parses as "work," and even I know my pup would rather be sleeping on my feet I think all the stimulation is so good for her that even if my work situation changes I will make sure to keep sending her at least once a day.
posted by Ignatius J. Reilly at 8:42 AM on February 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
Our pup comes home happy every day and wiped out some days, and the benefits to her socialization have been incredible. In fact, it may be that what your dogs need to be "doggy day care kind of dogs" is a week in doggy day care. Many members of the pack wear backpacks or have other little enhancements that make the walks more into something the dog parses as "work," and even I know my pup would rather be sleeping on my feet I think all the stimulation is so good for her that even if my work situation changes I will make sure to keep sending her at least once a day.
posted by Ignatius J. Reilly at 8:42 AM on February 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
Dog walkers and doggy day care can be really great options if you're lucky enough to have providers nearby. We had a great kennel where we used to take our guy -- it wasn't a new-style doggy day care, it was just a nice kennel where they liked hanging out with dogs and were happy to take him for the day if needed. He got to watch the cats, socialize with people and other dogs, etc. That was his favorite place (we tried other options - didn't hurt to test them out, but he made it clear what he liked).
Now that your dogs are mellow middle-agers, maybe you could block off the kitchen or another space, with comfy dog beds arranged, or crates left open, so they can move around a bit more during the day. Ditto what biscotti said about puzzles/treats -- we used a Kong in the morning.
In general they'll be happy if you're happy - we had to move a few times with our guy, and each time he adapted with grace.
posted by hms71 at 9:34 AM on February 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
Now that your dogs are mellow middle-agers, maybe you could block off the kitchen or another space, with comfy dog beds arranged, or crates left open, so they can move around a bit more during the day. Ditto what biscotti said about puzzles/treats -- we used a Kong in the morning.
In general they'll be happy if you're happy - we had to move a few times with our guy, and each time he adapted with grace.
posted by hms71 at 9:34 AM on February 5, 2012 [1 favorite]
Can they be left in the kitchen or another room? My dog has the tun of the house when I'm gone, so he can look out windows, dream of catching those darn squirrels, etc. If their crates are available, they can go in if they need to feel safe/sheltered.
It's nice of you to be concerned, but your dogs are probably snoozing, and hanging out with each other. If you spend some happy time with them in the morning, and lots of fun when you get home, most middle-aged dogs will be fine, esp. with another dog.
posted by theora55 at 10:53 AM on February 5, 2012
It's nice of you to be concerned, but your dogs are probably snoozing, and hanging out with each other. If you spend some happy time with them in the morning, and lots of fun when you get home, most middle-aged dogs will be fine, esp. with another dog.
posted by theora55 at 10:53 AM on February 5, 2012
We have a working dog breed (australian cattle dog), and she absolutely adores doggie day care - fetch is her favorite activity, and they will throw the ball for her all day long.
I'm not sure why dog day care is unsuitable for your dog - but I'd definitely look into it, and look at a few different ones. Our dog really loves hers, and a 10 hour day at daycare tires her out for a couple days, now that she's an older dog.
Also, my dog doesn't mind being crated at all - she seems to like it a lot, actually. She voluntarily goes in her crate at night to sleep, and I'm sure she wouldn't do that if she disliked it. She is also crated during the day, even when I'm home (because otherwise she gets anxious and barks a lot), and just spends the day sleeping. She's happy to come out of the crate in the late afternoon or evening, but she's definitely not sad while she's in the crate - she's just sleeping all curled up.
So, as long as you play and interact with your dogs in the evening, I'm sure they'll be just fine during the day!
posted by insectosaurus at 11:43 AM on February 5, 2012
I'm not sure why dog day care is unsuitable for your dog - but I'd definitely look into it, and look at a few different ones. Our dog really loves hers, and a 10 hour day at daycare tires her out for a couple days, now that she's an older dog.
Also, my dog doesn't mind being crated at all - she seems to like it a lot, actually. She voluntarily goes in her crate at night to sleep, and I'm sure she wouldn't do that if she disliked it. She is also crated during the day, even when I'm home (because otherwise she gets anxious and barks a lot), and just spends the day sleeping. She's happy to come out of the crate in the late afternoon or evening, but she's definitely not sad while she's in the crate - she's just sleeping all curled up.
So, as long as you play and interact with your dogs in the evening, I'm sure they'll be just fine during the day!
posted by insectosaurus at 11:43 AM on February 5, 2012
i have a six year old weimaraner. the first four years of his life, i was freelancing and stayed home with him so he got a ton of me time. now that i contract out and, including gym time, can be gone about 12 hours a day, he stays home, uncrated, and he is fine. he gets walks, dog park, and day care. on the weekends, we do as much outside as possible.
posted by violetk at 11:56 AM on February 5, 2012
posted by violetk at 11:56 AM on February 5, 2012
Even if they're not dog park/doggy day care kind of dogs, what about having someone come by and take them on a midday walk every day? Especially since they're middle-aged, that may be adequate exercise/stimulation to break up the 8-hour day before you get home.
posted by scody at 12:55 PM on February 5, 2012
posted by scody at 12:55 PM on February 5, 2012
If your dogs are normally well behaved I can't see why you would have to crate them all day. Did you crate them before when you went out? If you do have crates you can just leave the doors of the crates open so the dogs can retreat there if they want. But if your dogs are older getting up earlier and giving them a nice walk, even half an hour or so before you go to work and leaving them with some toys to keep them occupied, say a treat stuffed frozen kong, some chew toys they like like cow hoofs or whatever and then another nice walk when you get home and they'll be fine. There are 2 of them so they will keep each other company while you are gone.
I'd suggest some sort of classes or something in the evening to get you and your dogs out and to keep then mentally stimulated, agility as already suggested is great. Or just spending lots of time playing with them when you get home.
As long as you are calm with any changes your dogs will follow your lead and learn to live with whatever happens, as long as you allow them time to get used to the changes and they are still getting exercise and mental stimulation other ways.
posted by wwax at 3:10 PM on February 5, 2012
I'd suggest some sort of classes or something in the evening to get you and your dogs out and to keep then mentally stimulated, agility as already suggested is great. Or just spending lots of time playing with them when you get home.
As long as you are calm with any changes your dogs will follow your lead and learn to live with whatever happens, as long as you allow them time to get used to the changes and they are still getting exercise and mental stimulation other ways.
posted by wwax at 3:10 PM on February 5, 2012
I just wanted to clarify what I said above -- I didn't mean that you should do absolutely everything on that list. You should do as much on that list as you can, which is what I do and I think most people who have dogs do. If I had to pick two off that list, I'd go with dispensing with the crates and establishing your routine/schedule as most important to the health and happiness of the dogs.
Also, if you're only gone eight hours a day -- that's not so bad. If you can swing a nice long walk each day in the mornings, or in the afternoon, or after dinner, or before bed, in addition to whatever pee times you establish, I think that's pretty good.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 9:57 AM on February 6, 2012
Also, if you're only gone eight hours a day -- that's not so bad. If you can swing a nice long walk each day in the mornings, or in the afternoon, or after dinner, or before bed, in addition to whatever pee times you establish, I think that's pretty good.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 9:57 AM on February 6, 2012
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Can you afford a mid-day dog walker?
Can you incorporate a long walk with them in the morning into your morning routine?
Can you incorporate (also) a short walk with them in the afternoon into your home-from-work routine?
Are you too far from them during the day to make a mid-day return home for a quick pee realistic?
Dogs can be flexible but they like routine, like knowing what's going to happen. That will help them feel secure. And an environment with a high level of emotional and physical conflict was no place for them anyway.
Those are just ideas -- congratulations on finding the strength to leave your relationship and good for you for making your friends' happiness such a high priority.
posted by A Terrible Llama at 3:44 AM on February 5, 2012 [6 favorites]