Cool things to hang in my cubicle?
September 3, 2008 1:31 PM   Subscribe

What is the most awesome, smile inducing, envy inspiring thing I can hang on my cubicle wall?

Looking for anything from awesome calendars to favorite comic strips to specific pictures I can rasterbate .

I don't want to limit any suggestions except they have to be safe for work.
posted by shotgunbooty to Grab Bag (42 answers total) 49 users marked this as a favorite
The front half of an original Volkswagen Beetle, a taxidermied elephant head or one of those "so many beers, so little time" posters that fraternity members hang in their dorms.
posted by M.C. Lo-Carb! at 1:35 PM on September 3, 2008

"10 Ways Dick Cheney Can Kill You". It works wonders at my office. (my fav: telekenisis)
posted by Meatbomb at 1:36 PM on September 3, 2008 [1 favorite]

The Despair, Inc. posters are awesome. They look just like the inspirational posters people always hang up in offices...until you look closely.
posted by cerebus19 at 1:39 PM on September 3, 2008 [1 favorite]

A picture of yourself as a baby/small child, preferably doing something embarrassing.
posted by ferociouskitty at 1:40 PM on September 3, 2008

If you are going to blow it up so that it covers all of the walls of your cubicle I would totally go with "A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of the Grande Jatte."
posted by oddman at 1:40 PM on September 3, 2008

Depending on your workplace, this might be okay:

I just love that. Has the word "fuck" though.
posted by Nattie at 1:41 PM on September 3, 2008 [13 favorites]

I have my kindergarten diploma up.
posted by Slarty Bartfast at 1:47 PM on September 3, 2008 [9 favorites]

My personal preferences are McSweeney's lists and Harper's Indexes (from the dead tree version I get).
posted by kcm at 1:47 PM on September 3, 2008

I was going to suggest The Surrender, but I see it is sold out.
posted by milkrate at 1:50 PM on September 3, 2008 [1 favorite]

A designer I worked with had a Jump to Conclusions mat in his office. It was both fantastic and inarguable. Another coworker had a wall of freeze-dried spiders. I had a rotating series of images I cut out of arcitechtural calendars. If it hadn't been for another co-worker's screen-saver of classic BMWs, I never would have found out we had that in common.

Seriously, whatever individuality you can muster should be on display in your cube, and I can't tell you offhand what makes you an individual. It might be NASCAR winners or your sister's kids or Maine Coone cats, but whatever you loved before you got the job: Put it on the wall, unless it's porn.
posted by cirocco at 1:50 PM on September 3, 2008

How about decorating it with nothing except a diorama of your cubicle, also decorated with nothing, but an even tinier scale model of your cubicle. Keep going.
posted by poppo at 1:50 PM on September 3, 2008 [4 favorites]

A painting of dogs playing poker.
posted by PenDevil at 2:06 PM on September 3, 2008 [1 favorite]

I covered one panel of my cubicle in hawaiian shirt fabric. I folded it under around the edges and tacked it down with straight pins. You can see it here.
posted by cabingirl at 2:07 PM on September 3, 2008

The Evil Dead lunchbox I have sitting on a shelf in my office has always gotten more comments than any of the other (much cooler) stuff I have sitting in there.
posted by JaredSeth at 2:10 PM on September 3, 2008

The Ejection Handle from that time you had to punch out of your F-16 doin' mach 1.4. Down in the weeds. At night. Behind enemy lines.

Or a cat poster.
posted by dinger at 2:16 PM on September 3, 2008

A locked briefcase with a very very bright light inside. LEDs, or something else that won't start a fire. Hide the extension cord, and just hang the briefcase there, without comment.

Watch as people wonder why they can see light streaming from the cracks. When they ask, just say "I dunno, I found it down by the river and thought it the way it glowed was cool. Haven't figured out the combination yet. Sometimes it gets kinda hot."
posted by aramaic at 2:23 PM on September 3, 2008 [15 favorites]

A picture of yourself and super supermodel making out just before you took her to your place and made sweet love to her.
posted by dcrocha at 2:24 PM on September 3, 2008 [1 favorite]

My ULC cetificate of ordination draws quite a few comments.
posted by piedmont at 2:27 PM on September 3, 2008

Oh I think it can be anything that emphasizes your individuality and quirkiness. Personally I have a voodoo doll, juggling bags, my ordination "diploma" from the Universal Life Church, a signed photo of Andre the Giant, blow-ups of comix I find amusing (my fave I found today that made it on the wall), a Ratbert plush, a chattering teeth toy, and poetry all in full view in my office. Keeps visitors busy while I try and figure out how to help them. Usually elicits a smile at least.
posted by elendil71 at 2:38 PM on September 3, 2008

A (medical) human skeleton?
posted by PTCHFRKR at 2:41 PM on September 3, 2008

Get one of those kitten in a tree "Hang in there" posters. Killer stuff.
posted by Ponderance at 2:42 PM on September 3, 2008 [3 favorites]

Once, for a friend's birthday, I cross-stitched him a cheesy faux-country sampler, complete with a goose wearing a big blue bow around its neck.

And the sampler read, "Boot the grime of this world in the crotch, dear!"

So many people commented on it that he had to take it off his cubicle wall, for fear it would be stolen.

I guess the formula is Smiths lyrics + handicrafts?
posted by corey flood at 2:52 PM on September 3, 2008 [5 favorites]

Many moons ago, I sent off for some promotional material from DEC. I get a nice package of sales and technical docs all about the Alpha AXP 21164... they also included 4 high res posters of said processor with bare core and all. I have one of them in a poster frame hanging in my cube...

I cherish those posters, and I even kept all the books. I couldn't just dump them...

I will never forgive Carleton Sneed Fiorina and Michael "Curly" Capellas for killing Hewlett Packard, Compaq, Digital and the Alpha AXP.

"Who needs 64-bits?" Rockstar C.E.O. Damn you Fiorina and Capellas.

You will both burn quite nicely in Hell.
posted by PROD_TPSL at 3:07 PM on September 3, 2008

My SO sits at a desk where the previous occupant was ordained in the ULC. He hung his Dudism Ordination (from the Church of the Latter-Day Dude) certificate next to the ULC certificate.
posted by ml98tu at 3:32 PM on September 3, 2008 [1 favorite]

i keep my pens and stuff in a skull mug.
a jar of candy will make you a hit with everybody.
a sombrero.
posted by thinkingwoman at 3:44 PM on September 3, 2008

What is the most awesome, smile inducing, envy inspiring thing I can hang on my cubicle wall?

A stuffed and mounted clown head.
posted by lothar at 3:56 PM on September 3, 2008 [3 favorites]

Dorothy who does Cat and Girl is flogging personalised Compromise posters—if I could justify the cash, I'd want one.
posted by Fiasco da Gama at 4:23 PM on September 3, 2008

A former coworker of mine made a Wheel of Blame (out of cardboard, I believe). It was a wheel one could spin, with divisions similar to, say, the Wheel of Fortune wheel. Each division would have a different coworker's name, but an inordinately big piece would be assigned to the last person to have quit in the department. Every time something would go wrong he would announce he was spinning the Wheel of Blame. It would normally fall on the person who last left, but if it fell on your name he made a to-do about it. It became a source of amusement to everyone, especially if the wheel picked your name. Whether or not we were easily amused is another story.
posted by DrGirlfriend at 4:29 PM on September 3, 2008

i used to keep a box of slim jims that i bought at costco hidden in a drawer at my desk. when people would come to me asking for something, the conversation would go as follows:

other person: I need blah blah blah.

lester: would you like a tasty meat snack?

other person: wtf?

lester: they're very nutritious. (at this point i opened my drawer and handed the other person a slim jim.)

never failed to get a smile. of course, some people started asking me for stuff just to get a slim jim.

oh, and btw: spanish moss makes the coolest office plant!
posted by lester at 5:14 PM on September 3, 2008 [1 favorite]

I have a GIANT laminated world map from a National Geographic warehouse sale. Seriously, the thing is 10 feet wide (I lucked into some really tall walls). Everyone who comes in ends up gazing at it/talking about a trip/asking about places I've marked on it/wondering where ___________ is. I have another in the same size that's a US map, but not a good space to put it.
posted by ersatzkat at 5:55 PM on September 3, 2008

Hydrogen or A-bomb explosion poster? Like so?

Co-worker used to have a Wheel of Yum! Simple, hand-made poster with arrow that lets you pick where lunch was coming from. Note: fully customizable.
posted by fijiwriter at 6:10 PM on September 3, 2008

Keep Calm and Carry On?

I like a lot of the prints on the website, actually.
posted by Andorinha at 7:10 PM on September 3, 2008

The local haircuttery place sent me a "free haircut" coupon which is now on my cube wall. It always gets a laugh. [I'm bald]

That, and a page from the daily (July 27, 2006) "Worst Case Scenario" desk calendar which illustrates "how to leap from a motorcycle to a car." On July 27th, 2006, I was involved in a highway motorcycle accident on the way home from work. [and no, my intention was not to practice the technique!]
posted by Perplexer at 7:54 PM on September 3, 2008

My uncle, when he was an accountant, had this in his office:

While in this office please speak to me in low, dulcet tones and do not disagree with me in any manner. Understand that when one has reached my age and general state of disillusion, noise and non-concurrence cause gastric hyper-peristalsis, hyper-secretion of the hydrochloric acid and rubor of the gastric mucosa, and I become a most Unpleasant Bastard.

Disclaimer: all medical terms sic, may not be a proper diagnosis, IANAD.

Also, this was my father's favourite strip which featured prominently in his office for many years. I like it a lot.

disclaimer: My father was a tax consultant.
posted by h00py at 9:55 PM on September 3, 2008

My PhD supervisor has these attached to his desk lamp along with a fifth one his daughter made which looks just like him. So you get Darwin, Franklin, Curie, Einstein, Laing ...

Anything unique and personalised like that works I reckon.
posted by shelleycat at 10:49 PM on September 3, 2008

I've got the Japanese poster for Them! at my desk.

That's a shitty iPhone pic, but you get the idea. I love it.
posted by fairytale of los angeles at 11:25 PM on September 3, 2008

These old timey office memos, from this post, are hilarious. Print a few off and pin them up or, for bonus points, leave them around the public printer as if they're genuine.
posted by twirlypen at 3:26 AM on September 4, 2008

I have this image on my door: "it's comforting to know that no matter what you do in life it will never be as awesom as this picture."
posted by jasonhong at 12:50 PM on September 4, 2008

Something stuffed perhaps?
posted by andythebean at 9:37 AM on September 5, 2008

An actual moon know, in a case, the whole nine yards. Pretty sure it would be impossible to get without a remarkable heist of some government warehouse. But, you could be sure no one else has one and that you'd have a great story. You could probably even charge people 5 bucks each to touch it.
posted by jonmrich at 8:00 AM on September 10, 2008

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