No hablo espanol but I'd like to be polite.

February 22, 2008 11:14 AM

What is the polite way to deal with service workers who speak poor English in an English-speaking country?

I live in the suburban Chicago area and many of the service workers here are from Spanish-speaking countries. I have trouble understanding some of them, and some of them apparently have trouble understanding me. I speak almost no Spanish, but I'd love to learn and I think I'd pick it up quickly. I look and talk like the whitest white girl, and I haven't lived in diverse places before, so I'm trying not to look like a culturally inept idiot or a jerk.

1. If I did learn some basic Spanish, would it be rude to assume someone knows Spanish based on their appearance/nametag and begin speaking in Spanish? I've known people named Garcia or Rodriguez who didn't speak a word of Spanish, but they were rarely in service occupations. It seems a pretty safe bet around here, but I don't know if anyone would think I was assuming they didn't know English (or speak it well enough) and thus be offended.

2. If I did order my food (or whatever) in Spanish, is it going to cause more confusion? (This happened in France, when my mediocre attempts at French led them to think I was fluent and I would get rapidfire responses I didn't understand.)

3. Until I learn more Spanish, what's the best way to politely communicate with, say, the janitorial staff at the office? I'd greet an English-speaking person with "How's it going?" or "Nice day out" or whatever, but I refrain when I'm not sure the person will understand me, and then I feel like an idiot for not saying anything, but I don't want to try to manage a casual conversation with someone who doesn't share my language.

posted by desjardins to human relations (25 comments total)

For (3), I would use standard English greetings or goodbyes for them; they're probably going to understand basically what you're trying to communicate (when it's paired with appropriate body language/ facial cues) and it might help them pick up some English phrases as well.
posted by frobozz at 11:20 AM on February 22

It feels like you're over-thinking this a bit.

3. You're in the US, it is appropriate to use the most likely language for simple greetings. Hello, How are you, Have a nice day... probably safe bets that even non-English speakers will understand.

If you KNOW they speak Spanish, and you know the appropriate Spanish greeting, it seems like a respectful gesture to use it.

2. Regarding the restaurant situation.... again, you're in the US, you should assume that the wait staff speak English. Unless, of course, it is a Mexican/Spanish/whatever restaurant where it would be appropriate to order in Spanish.. if so, give it a shot. I've run into the same situation, attempting my meager french while in a french speaking country, only to have them respond thinking I'm literate...it's good to know how to apologize and say "I only speak a little....whatever the language is!" when that happens.

1. (don't ask why I did this backwards...)... If I'm in the US I wouldn't assume the language someone speaks based on the name tag. Begin with English, if that doesn't work, do the best you can...

bottom line, I think, is always be respectful, no matter what the language barrier, somehow it will work out if there are smiles involved.

I lived in Korea for a year, for the first six months I spoke very little Korean... but a smile, some effort, some respect always resulted in communication sufficient enough to get by...
posted by HuronBob at 11:24 AM on February 22

If I did learn some basic Spanish, would it be rude to assume someone knows Spanish based on their appearance/nametag and begin speaking in Spanish?

Yes, this is a bad idea. On the other hand, if you start speaking to someone and it's obvious they are having trouble understanding your intentions, it is appropriate to attempt to switch to another language they might be more comfortable with. This is always a well-received gesture, Europeans do it almost instinctively.
posted by onalark at 11:25 AM on February 22

1. I know enough Spanish from school to be able to do this, but I never do. I think it's rude to assume that someone who looks hispanic would want to speak in Spanish, but that's just my opinion.

2. I would suggest only ordering your food in Spanish if you try in English and it doesn't work. For example, if you say "fries" and the person doesn't understand you, you can say "papas fritas".

3. Usually just similing and saying "Hi" is enough for me. Also, even if you spend a long time trying to learn Spanish, the vast majority of native Spanish speakers who live in Chicago will be able to speak English better than you can speak Spanish.
posted by burnmp3s at 11:27 AM on February 22

For 1) I would start in English and then switch to the basic Spanish once you had figured they didn't understand you. For 2) If you are white, they probably will never think that you speak very good Spanish. I am Indian, but am often mistaken for Hispanic and people will speak rapid fire Spanish to me, aven though my Spanish is basic. I also have white friends who speak fluent Spanish, but Spanish speakers always assume they don't speak Spanish. Even when they are speaking good Spanish, they get halting slow replies in return. That kind of prejudice goes both ways.
posted by sweetkid at 11:29 AM on February 22 [1 favorite]

Yes, in suburban Chicago, it would seem rude to me to begin in Spanish based on appearance or surname.

Speak English. They will partially understand you, if not totally. It's clear from the context what you want them to do for you, since it's their job. Then if necessary you can add a few disconnected words in Spanish, which will fill in the specific details that were not understood.

You can say "hi" or "how's it going" to an immigrant janitor. How could they not know that much English? You don't need to have "a casual conversation" (your wording). What would you want to chat about anyway? Do you really need to have a meeting of the minds on whether it's a nice day? You are being way too self-conscious about this.

Ordering food: The menu is in English. They are familiar with the menu.

This way, since your Spanish is very limited, you will give them credit for the English they do know, and not make your self responsible for (or add confusion by) speaking to them fully in Spanish.

On preview, I agree with everyone above.
posted by JimN2TAW at 11:30 AM on February 22

2. It could cause confusion if the person had a follow up question (here or to go? drinks? etc.) but if you were otherwise going to order in English anyway, I think it's safe to order in Spanish and switch to English if there's any confusion.

I speak little to no Spanish myself, but I try to use what little I do have when eating at my favorite taco trucks/Mexican restaurants. I always say hola and gracias even if the rest of the conversation is in English. If the fact that I never have to wait in line to order my food anymor. is anything to go by, I'd say that the little Spanish I try to speak has made me a memorable and popular customer.

As far as 3 goes, you can always just start by saying hola and moving on to como estas after learning some Spanish once you think you'll be able to understand the response.
posted by nerdcore at 11:31 AM on February 22

1. Yes, assumptions can offend, and that one in particular comes up a lot in people's stories of rudeness. This is where there is a big difference between busting out your limited Spanish while ordering at the taqueria, and when talking to a brown-skinned person (who may not in fact speak Spanish at all) in a random service job. Assuming I am not at the taqueria, my rule of thumb is to use English first, and then try other languages / hand waving / confused expressions if English fails. But this is always situational -- people code-switch all the time, and as the context changes so does the appropriate behavior. There really isn't a perfect rule that will always work, that will never offend, and that will make everyone happy.

2. No, except that sometimes a person will choose to be a dick about it (like happens in many people's stories of Parisian waiters). If your "yo quiero una quesadilla" is sufficiently strongly-accented and mispronounced, the chances of someone thinking you are fluent is limited. The problems come when your pronunciation gets better than your vocabulary, and then you have the problem you describe happening to you in France.

3. "Hi" and a smile? There is a big difference between communicating with someone who is truly monolingual, and someone who has limited English and a strong accent. But I think the general rules of basic politeness apply -- say Hi and Nice day and all that, and if you know they are monolingual then you have the perfect opportunity to practice the same basic phrases in Spanish. Politeness is always appreciated -- but don't make some underpaid person take time from their job to be your language coach, either. (Sounds too basic to even mention, but I have seen it happen before.)
posted by Forktine at 11:31 AM on February 22

I had lunch at a Ritz Carlton cafe with a former boss who spoke Spanish and English. She tried to talk to the wait staff in Spanish and they always responded in English. It was her suspicion that they were not allowed to speak Spanish to the guests even if the guest was speaking Spanish. I think you should converse in English because that might be what the worker has been instructed to do.
posted by 45moore45 at 11:39 AM on February 22

1. If I did learn some basic Spanish, would it be rude to assume someone knows Spanish based on their appearance/nametag and begin speaking in Spanish?
Yes. As an example, while walking to class on campus one day, I was approached by a Jehovah's witness who started speaking to me in very loud, bad Chinese. I'm several generations removed from China and don't speak the language natively, so it was kind of awkward.

However, some people might be impressed and/or happy at your attempt to communicate with them; this kind of thing seems to vary between different groups. I live in an area with a lot of Mexican immigrants, and there is always the occasional nonnative Spanish speaker who strikes up conversation with Spanish-speaking servicepeople. They usually seem to get a kick out of it, but of course they have to humor customers. The nonnative speaker in question is usually very good at Spanish, too.

On the other hand, it's very common for second or third generation Mexican-Americans to speak to people who are clearly first generation immigrants in Spanish, but I think that's more of a "we're in the same club" kind of thing than anything.

2. If I did order my food (or whatever) in Spanish, is it going to cause more confusion?
Depends on how well you can speak Spanish, of course!

3. Until I learn more Spanish, what's the best way to politely communicate with, say, the janitorial staff at the office?
Speak to them the same way you would an English-speaking janitorial staff. Immigrants who have been living in the US for years will certainly understand "Hi" and "How's it going." There's no harm in helping them to learn basic English phrases.
posted by pravit at 11:39 AM on February 22

Nthing to start in English, then try out a little phrasebook Spanish to clarify if needed.
posted by desuetude at 11:44 AM on February 22

General rule is that you speak English in America. It is our unofficial national language, after all, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's an exception if Spanish happens to be an easier language to communicate in, based on the specific language aptitude of the people involved. To try to guess that by looking at someone seems rude -- but more to the point, completely unnecessary since you can simply start speaking in English and play it by ear if the person seems confused.

And really, the idea that "Well, if you're in a taqueria..." does not make a lot of sense. There are plenty of waiters who work in ethnic restaurants without speaking the corresponding language. Would you recommend that an American who speaks Italian go to Italian restaurants and order in Italian if the waiter looks Italian? I don't think so.

Then again, I don't see anything wrong with starting out: "Oh, do you speak Spanish?" and segueing into Spanish if the answer is yes. But if you're going to do that... I'd think you better be darn sure that (1) you can do it without seeming condescending and (2) you're fluent enough that they wouldn't prefer to speak with you in English.
posted by jejune at 12:10 PM on February 22

You can say "hi" or "how's it going" to an immigrant janitor. How could they not know that much English? You don't need to have "a casual conversation" (your wording). What would you want to chat about anyway? Do you really need to have a meeting of the minds on whether it's a nice day? You are being way too self-conscious about this.

I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to treat people like human beings - whether they're fresh off the boat, or speak perfect English and simply pick up your trash.
posted by GPF at 12:44 PM on February 22 [1 favorite]

I should begin by saying I'm not a native Spanish speaker (I'm a native Japanese speaker) and I currently don't have much problem in communicating in English 99.9% of the times (I've lived here for over 10 years), but there was a time I had a difficulty communicating with others when I first came here.

I should also note that this is my personal take/feeling/ideas, and it may not be the same for all who are here whose first language is not English.

With that having been said - first, I REALLY (and REALLY) don't like it when people assume I don't speak English. I didn't at the time, and I still don't. I hate it when some strangers come up and say "ni-hao" (hello in Chinese). I say nothing. They assume I'm not Chinese, so they say hello in something else. They'd even say "konnnichiwa?" (hello in Japanese) but I'd still ignore. It's not that I don't want to speak - it's the underlying assumption that annoys me. So I'd think speaking Spanish to someone simply due to his/her name and industry the person's in would come across very rude (= your name sounds Spanish and you are in service industry, therefore you must not speak English).

It doesn't mean you can't speak someone else's language. But in my opinion, I am here and chose to be here, and I'd better be speaking English. I can't go around assuming people would know my language.

However, back then, when I had a really difficult time explaining something, it helped me to have people who sincerely tried to understand me either in Japanese or in English.

In the end, I think sincerity and the effort in trying to make the communication successful is what matters - whether you speak their language or not. And it only comes across as rude when someone comes up to me with an assumption of my need, whether it is confirmed by me or not. (as in, repetitively shouting "konnichiwa?? KONNICHIWA???")

Oh, and it also helps to say "excuse me?" or "sorry, can you repeat that" with a little flavor of friendliness. I always felt intimidated when someone just said "huh?" or "what?" and made my comeback communication a little harder.
posted by grafholic at 12:57 PM on February 22 [2 favorites]

For what it's worth--I have a friend from Argentina (a native Spanish speaker) who has lived in the US for several years. Once, I asked him if he ever switched to Spanish when he encountered service workers here who spoke English poorly but were native Spanish speakers. Apparently, he had tried this once or twice but found that it did not go over well--he said the people he was speaking to were either confused, or they thought he was making fun of them (keep in mind that an Argentinean Spanish accent is distinct from Mexican and Central American accents).

Anyway, I agree with the others here that you should stick with English. One thing that may help more than trying to learn another language is to remember to speak clearly and slowly (but please, not loudly) if the person you are talking to doesn't seem to understand you. And, if you'd like to have a chat with your janitors, just stick to the basics and make a concerted effort on your part to try to understand what they are saying--they could know more English than you realize, but still have a thick accent that can take some getting used to. I found this was the case with many of the cooks at my old restaurant job.
posted by Jemstar at 1:12 PM on February 22

1. Yes, assumptions are rude. But I don't think it's rude to ask. And I don't think it's rude to speak Spanish to someone if you've heard them speaking Spanish to someone else. Of course, if your Spanish is no better than their English, it's probably a wash. But if you want to practice your Spanish with someone, why not just say so? I'm just learning, how am I doing? They might not think you're the sharpest tool in the box, but it could be good for a laugh or two.

2. It might cause more confusion. They're not going to kick you out over it. If you're in a place where people are speaking Spanish, and you want to speak Spanish too, speak Spanish. Or not. If they start speaking crazy fast Spanish back, just laugh and explain that you're just learning and can they please slow down.

Would you recommend that an American who speaks Italian go to Italian restaurants and order in Italian if the waiter looks Italian? I don't think so.

Maybe. At Olive Garden, no, but in Little Italy, definitely. Between those, it's case by case and has a lot to do with the "feel" of the place itself. Here in New York, I can't imagine a taqueria where you couldn't order in Spanish. Then again, here in New York, almost all restaurant staff know at least some Spanish.

3. They know basic greetings. How many world languages do you know "Hi how are you fine thanks and you fine thanks bye" in? And they live here. They know, don't worry.
posted by lampoil at 1:29 PM on February 22

As everyone said, don't assume. For people you encounter regularly, you can ask them to help you practice your Spanish. Whenever you see that person, you can exchange the normal pleasantries in Spanish. You'll learn Spanish much faster this way since you'll hear more diverse and natural sentences and constructions.

My Spanish isn't fabulous, but I do this with some of service people if they aren't too busy. If they are busy we revert to whatever language is fastest. Sometimes the person simply asks all the questions to Mr. 26.2 who speaks beautiful Spanish. When that happens, I'm not offended. I do listen and try to follow as best I can which is probably the same challenge non-English speakers face all the time.
posted by 26.2 at 1:40 PM on February 22 [1 favorite]

Start with English. If there's a communication gap, or if you need to clarify something, try Spanish.

Starting with poor Spanish only to discover that the person speaks perfectly good English is quite embarrassing!
posted by kidbritish at 2:06 PM on February 22

i use english unless there is a clear communication problem. then i switch to spanish. my spanish isn't great, but i find it is appreciated. sometimes i'll use a mix of both (si, queso on the turkey sandwich pero not on the ham, gracias.)
posted by thinkingwoman at 2:16 PM on February 22

I understand your desire to be friendly and helpful, and I agree with previous posters who recommend asking first. I start out in English. Once I know for sure that the person speaks Spanish and is clearly having trouble in English, I switch to Spanish and usually the person looks relieved or thanks me. My Spanish is pretty good, so we end up actually conversing, which might make a difference.

I wouldn't use Spanish to order standard dishes from a menu, because the waitperson is familiar with the menu and is probably proud of having learned enough English to have that job. I save the Spanish for more complex situations.
posted by PatoPata at 3:59 PM on February 22

If you are the customer, they usually greet you first, no? Speak in the language they greet you in. Or the language the menu is in.

Otherwise, always default to the language prevalent where you are. English in the US, French in the UK, Spanish in Mexico. (Don't know what you do in Brussels...) To do anything else is rude and/or condescending. Normal people are offended by assumptions.

In this specific situation, I can almost guarantee that their English is going to be better than your Spanish.
posted by gjc at 6:14 PM on February 22

As a dark-skinned non-Spanish speaker, I found it quite confusing when people in the US started talking to me in Spanish. Was never quite sure whether to try breaking out my extremely limited high school Castilian Spanish, or just ask them to speak English.

In terms of effective communication, I suspect you're probably better off just talking in simple, slow English.
posted by TheophileEscargot at 1:47 AM on February 23

Had a gringa girlfriend in Chile. Very blond, very gringa looking, spoke quite good Spanish. She's get all sorts of pissed when people started speaking English to her, especially as her Spanish was invariably a ton better than their English.

When I lived in the US for 2 years, I would have been pissed if somebody started speaking crappy Spanish to me. Didn't happen, probably because I'm fairly light skinned.

would it be rude to assume someone knows Spanish based on their appearance/nametag and begin speaking in Spanish

Yes, very rude. Do not assume you can tell what language a person speaks by the color of their skin. They might be third-generation non-Spanish speaking, or Brazilian, or whatever.
posted by signal at 7:00 PM on February 23

I live in a Spanish speaking country in a place with very few US / Canadian tourists. I am very light skinned. I don't speak Spanish fluently, but I can certainly get by in all day to day situations, as well as carry on most conversations. Also, my Spanish (flawed as it is) is usually five times better than the English of waitstaff and shop clerks. Yet, the waitstaff and shopclerks try to speak English to me 50% of the time. When they start speaking to me in English right off the bat, I get a little offended. "What, they think I'm stupid? They think I live in this country yet I don't speak a lick of Spanish??" But then there are others, who always start in Spanish, and then sheepishly ask, "Do you speak English?" When I say yes, they'll mention that they used to study English in school or that they lived in the US for six months or something like that. Then they'll try out an English phrase or two. Sometimes they'll be quite conversational, other times they only have a few words. But it's very sweet to me and not at all annoying. You can tell they're doing it because they want to practice and not because they think I need help. When people insist on speaking to me in incredibly broken English even when I answer in Spanish, it's insanely annoying and condescending.

In other words, try to seem like you want their help, instead of assuming they need yours (even if you really think they do).
posted by mosessis at 9:45 PM on March 30

Another thought: if you want to help out someone who you think might not speak perfect English, you can try to speak more slowly and enunciate. Not yelling and frenzied pointing, but try to use clear and direct language at "radio speed" (slowed down for clarity but not so that anyone would hear and think 'wow, that's slow'). It can be really frustrating trying to speak with mumblers and people who use crazy slang.

A couple examples of things you can clarify in English.
(a) use direct questions instead of indirect questions and use fewer clauses. "I want the cheeseburger, but no onions." instead of "I'd like to order the cheeseburger, but I'd really like, well, only if I can get it without onions."
(b) replace obscure phrasal verbs with their latinate equivalent or at least a simpler form. "Add more spiciness" instead of "Spice it up a bit." "What's the total?" instead of "Can you add it up for us?"
posted by mosessis at 8:43 PM on March 31