What to do with all these panties?

November 30, 2007 4:32 PM

What to do with all these panties?

Okay, so I have recently been on a quest for better underwear that actually fits and doesn't fall off my rather narrow hips. And hooray, I found it at last, but in the meantime I've acquired a whole bunch of underwear that I don't like.
It's been worn, but isn't worn out, and I don't like to give it to Goodwill or similar since I don't think anyone would want to buy someone's old underwear.
Any ideas what I could do with it? Craft project? There are about 20 pairs in varying colors, either all-cotton or mostly cotton with spandex.

posted by exceptinsects to clothing, beauty, & fashion (42 answers total)

I know this sounds awful but you could always set up a website and sell your panties to panties fetishists.

You don't even really have to do anything with them, really. If you just say you've worn them, some guys will pay good money for them.

It may be degrading or empowering, depending on your perspective, but at least you'll be getting rid of some underwear, making some cash, and making some guy happy.
posted by champthom at 4:36 PM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

I don't think anyone would want to buy someone's old underwear.

Are you new to the internet?



People will buy anything, especially on eBay.
posted by fire&wings at 4:37 PM on November 30, 2007 [8 favorites]

I'm sure if you offered them up on Freecycle, with all your caveats as given above, someone would take them. People take anything free.

So what underwear did you end up with? Mine is always too big in the hips too. The only thing I've found that fits in the hips is little girls' underwear, in large sizes. But buying little girls underwear as a 40-year old woman is sort of strange.
posted by otherwordlyglow at 4:40 PM on November 30, 2007

Says on your profile that you're a librarian. There are tons of people on eBay who would snap "L@@K SEXY LIBRARIAN PANTIES" right up!
posted by Metroid Baby at 4:40 PM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

Sell 'em to preverts on the interwebs.
posted by Scoo at 4:41 PM on November 30, 2007

You're actually not permitted to sell used panties on eBay. But the goodwill will probably move them, if they're nice and clean. Homeless folks need knickers too.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 4:41 PM on November 30, 2007

Duh, it never occurred to me that OF COURSE perverts would want my panties!

Too bad about eBay. I wondered if that might not be quite kosher. Well, if anyone wants sexxxy librarian underwear, send me a message and I'll mail you some. :)
Otherwise Goodwill might be the best option, I just felt like it might be a bit rude to expect that someone would want to wear previously used underpants.

Still, if you have any other ideas, let's hear 'em.

Ohterworldlyglow, I ended up with Lane Bryant's "cotton spandex hipster"; dunno if you fit into their sizes...I got the 14/16 which was the smallest.
posted by exceptinsects at 4:57 PM on November 30, 2007

You could always throw them out.
posted by Max Power at 4:57 PM on November 30, 2007

Make a big long chain out of them and make the most festive Christmas tree garland that there ever was.
posted by mmascolino at 4:58 PM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

Hot air balloon!
posted by wemayfreeze at 5:02 PM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

seconding mmascolino
posted by iamkimiam at 5:03 PM on November 30, 2007

Sew them at the sides and create a multi-colored panty garland to decorate your Christmas tree.
posted by 45moore45 at 5:04 PM on November 30, 2007

Oh wait how did I not think of this? I gave vitrum a wonderful birthday gift: the Panty Sandwich! I knew he liked panties and sandwiches, so I really nailed it that time. Here is the recipe.

1 veggie sandwich from Togos (cheese optional)
2 pairs folded panties

Insert panties into sandwich, re-wrap and gift. For some reason all the pictures of that special night are private.
posted by Ambrosia Voyeur at 5:06 PM on November 30, 2007 [2 favorites]

This
posted by MsMolly at 5:15 PM on November 30, 2007

A quilt for a boyfriend on a cold snowy night.
posted by JohnnyGunn at 5:16 PM on November 30, 2007

Build a little house out of them - and call it the Panty Shanty!

Then make one next to it out of something else, and call it the Anti-Panty Shanty!
posted by ORthey at 5:17 PM on November 30, 2007 [2 favorites]

I read somewhere recently about a women's shelter that was looking for underwear donations, especially in larger sizes.

Ah. Here it is. It's from a blog based out of Houston, but perhaps your local women's shelter has the same need.
posted by donajo at 5:30 PM on November 30, 2007

Make a quilt!
posted by SansPoint at 5:42 PM on November 30, 2007

Is it universally acceptable, then, to put underwear, bras, socks, etc. in those public clothing donation bins? I was afraid it might be uncouth.
posted by lemuria at 5:44 PM on November 30, 2007

If you buy twenty or so of the clear, round plastic containers that pre-made pasta or salad meals come in - maybe by having pasta for lunch a lot, or maybe buying them from a plastic container vendor - you'll find that if you open one of them out, feed one half through each leg-hole of the panties, and put the combination over your head, you will have an excellent "The Fly" costume.

Make and sell these.
posted by flashboy at 5:46 PM on November 30, 2007

Says on your profile that you're a librarian. There are tons of people on eBay who would snap "L@@K SEXY LIBRARIAN PANTIES" right up!
posted by meeshell at 5:47 PM on November 30, 2007

Ebanned has carved out a niche for the sale of things that ebay doesn't permit. Many, many things. Things that will haunt your dreams.
posted by bac at 5:48 PM on November 30, 2007 [3 favorites]

I've been involved in enough charity garage sales to know that yes, people will absolutely buy used undies. And not for fetishistic reasons. If you're poor enough, a pair of twenty-five cent used panties is a real option.
posted by Pater Aletheias at 6:06 PM on November 30, 2007

Protest against the Burmese military junta. Many of their generals are superstitious and believe women's underwear saps them of their strength.

(Embassy addresses)
posted by H-Bar at 6:07 PM on November 30, 2007 [10 favorites]

God, I hate the word panties.

Why don't you just use them for rags? Or cut them into strips and weave pot holders and trivets for all of your unsuspecting friends. Remember these?
posted by iconomy at 6:13 PM on November 30, 2007

Thrift stores sell used underwear. They must get it from somewhere... go ahead and donate 'em.
posted by The corpse in the library at 6:42 PM on November 30, 2007

Hats for the long-eared. Imagine how happy you could make the cold, cold Christmas donkey.
posted by amtho at 7:07 PM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

Knit yourself a headband. Or using the same technique she describes of spiral cutting the panties into yarn, the knitting/crochet options are infinite. Penis cozy? Ipod cozy? Handbag? Change purse? Something useful but deliciously ripe with the double entendre of container/vajayjay perhaps?
posted by hecho de la basura at 7:28 PM on November 30, 2007

goodwill. together with anything else less fortunate people might need.

am I the only non-sleazebag in this thread?
posted by krautland at 7:48 PM on November 30, 2007

Check with the local thrift store/charity before donating them. In my area, they will not be sold. They will be sent directly to the dumpster without ever approaching GO.

Not only is it possible they not benefit anyone, they will take up the time of the volunteers and/or paid folks trying to run an establishment that doesn't deal in used undies.
posted by LoraxGuy at 7:53 PM on November 30, 2007

You could make a punching bag
posted by advicepig at 8:11 PM on November 30, 2007

Throw them at Paul and Storm.
posted by Faint of Butt at 8:49 PM on November 30, 2007 [1 favorite]

trash
posted by caddis at 9:03 PM on November 30, 2007

I use mine for boot-polishing rags.
posted by ottereroticist at 9:14 PM on November 30, 2007

You could also save a few pairs for ripping-off purposes.
posted by ottereroticist at 9:15 PM on November 30, 2007

Goodwill doesn't sell all of its donations, some of it gets bundled and sent overseas, to rag shops and other destinations. So, if they feel your underwear is undesirable it'll still be used somehow.
posted by edgeways at 9:33 PM on November 30, 2007

Throw them onstage!
posted by xo at 9:44 PM on November 30, 2007 [2 favorites]

I'm donating mine, along with a bunch of socks I bought because I didn't have access to a laundromat as easily as I had access to new socks. These socks are a symbol of my shame.
posted by crinklebat at 1:21 AM on December 1, 2007

Well, if anyone wants sexxxy librarian underwear, send me a message and I'll mail you some. :)

Please please please come back and just tell us how many e-mail requests you got from MeFi members.
posted by rokusan at 1:48 AM on December 1, 2007

Make a quilt out of squares of panty fabric, with the theme "Undies of my past".
posted by catburger at 1:27 AM on December 2, 2007

I was just reading that womens' shelters often need underwear.

Apparently underwear is often cut off and saved as evidence during the rape exam, so women arrive in borrowed clothes with no underwear.
posted by Sheppagus at 3:41 PM on December 3, 2007

Disappointingly, no one has asked for any. You would think there would be more people on MeFi with librarian fetishes. Sigh.
posted by exceptinsects at 9:57 AM on January 13, 2008