Why can't I have sex with my girlfriend?
November 15, 2007 9:13 AM Subscribe
I can't keep an erection while having sex with my girlfriend. What is my problem?
posted by misled to health & fitness (31 answers total) 1 user marked this as a favorite
Quite embarrassing for me to ask this, but I need some help. I am a male in my mid 20's and I have a problem keeping myself 'hard' for intercourse with my girlfriend.
I have been dating this woman for a couple of months but every time we try to have sex everything on my end will get screwed up. Everything will be fine, meaning I am able to have/keep a erection prior to penetration, but when it comes down to actual penetration everything just goes completely wrong (meaning I lose my erection in addition to my self-esteem). I keep telling myself that it is all in my head, but I was hoping I could get some advice as to where this problem might stem from so that I can better understand it. Could it be the build up to the sex that is bothering me? Could it seriously just all be in my head?
I haven't had this problem before with previous women, but then again I haven't ever had sex with a woman I cared so much about. Could it be an intimacy issue? I don't think it has anything to do with my girlfriend - I find her very attractive and she is very sexual. It just KILLS me that I am killing our sex life completely. This has happened more than once - enough so that I am looking for information anywhere I can find it. My girlfriend is starting to beat herself up over it thinking it is her that is causing. Thankfully we are able to communicate so well in order to relinquish some of these complexes she is creating but the more it happens the more she brings up her being the cause.
Thanks in advance for any advice that is given. If you have any questions, please ask and I will respond as soon as I can.