Help my toddler enjoy milk

September 11, 2007 6:40 AM

How can I get my toddler to drink milk?

My son is a happy and healthy little guy, but for some reason he won't drink cows milk. Although he eats cheese and yogurt, I'm concerned that he isn't getting enough calcium.

We've tried giving regular milk, organic milk, rice milk, soy milk, strawberry milk, chocolate milk, skim milk, 2% milk, whole milk, cold milk, warm milk, milk and cereal, and milk in a silly cup with one of those twisty straws. At most, he will take a sip, make a face, and then ask for juice.

Any ideas for getting him to partake?

posted by Xazeru to grab bag (41 comments total)

If he's eating cheese and yogurt and you give him a calcium fortified juice, does he really need additional milk? Does he eat calcium rich vegetables? What about goat's milk?
posted by onhazier at 6:43 AM on September 11, 2007 [1 favorite]

Maybe he's allergic to something in milk? They say that foods that kids don't like are the ones you find out later in life that you're allergic to.

Why's it so important that he drink cow's milk, which humans never naturally consumed anyway, if he's otherwise healthy and gets enough calcium?
posted by SpecialK at 6:45 AM on September 11, 2007 [1 favorite]

Cut the juice, stick to water, and see if his taste buds come around to milk.
posted by zeoslap at 6:59 AM on September 11, 2007 [1 favorite]

I realise this doesn't quite answer your question, but he doesn't really need milk.
If you're concerned about calcium, there are lots of calcium-fortified juices available commercially (at least where I live).
posted by Count Ziggurat at 6:59 AM on September 11, 2007 [1 favorite]

Mostly, I don't want him drinking juice all the time. I think he can do without all that sugar. Currently, we offer a little diluted juice in the morning and afternoon snack, and the rest of the time he drinks water.

He does pretty well with vegetables, particularly broccoli and peas, both of which have some calcium I believe.

I never considered goats milk. I'll give that a try. Thanks!
posted by Xazeru at 7:02 AM on September 11, 2007

i never liked milk as a kid. turns out i'm lactose intolerant. Of course, I didn't like goat's milk that much either, but hey. Soy milk/rice milk was definitely the way to go. To second what SpecialK said, have you considered checking to see if he's allergic?
posted by dubold at 7:15 AM on September 11, 2007

Here's a list of alternate calcium sources.
posted by BozoBurgerBonanza at 7:17 AM on September 11, 2007

As long as he's eating yogurt and cheese in the right amounts, he really doesn't need cow's milk. As for the juice, keep diluting it more and more (really gradually) until you can switch him to plain water. Juice is not a necessary dietary component; straight fruits provide everything he needs without the added sugars.

Good sources of calcium include green leafy vegetables, legumes, and some forms of tofu. You didn't say how old your toddler, is but the recommended calcium for kids aged 1-3 is 500 mg per day, for kids 4-8 it's 800 mg per day.

An important nutrient that should go along with calcium is Vitamin D. If you live in the Southern US, he's likely getting plenty of Vitamin D with just 5-15 minutes of being out in the sun several times a week. If you don't live in the Southern US, good sources of Vitamin D can be found in fatty fish (like salmon), eggs, and some fortified cereals.

Bottom line is, if he's eating a varied diet of veggies and fruits and some meats and fish, he's fine.
posted by cooker girl at 7:19 AM on September 11, 2007

Regular milk has lots of sugar in it. It's not sucrose, but it's still sugar.

How about a fizzy water/juice mixture? That lessens it. Or what about the unsweetened soy milk? That can at least provide some protein.
posted by answergrape at 7:21 AM on September 11, 2007

I don't think it'd be worth the effort to try and get him to enjoy milk, let alone simply consuming it -- it'd be a long process and he'd probably put up a good fight. It sounds like he doesn't like the consistency of milk, given the fact that chocolate milk hasn't changed his opinion! Food aversions are very normal for all people and his calcium can be obtained from other sources.

I know from my personal experience that being, um, strongly encouraged by my mother to drink milk during my childhood is directly responsible for me not having touched the stuff for the past 15 years.

He does pretty well with vegetables, particularly broccoli and peas

Count your blessings and move on! :)
posted by puritycontrol at 7:22 AM on September 11, 2007

I have never been able to drink milk. It makes me gag. When I was a teenager, I tried to force myself to down a glass to impress a popular kid I was trying to befriend. I vomited. I still managed to grow up into a reasonably productive adult. I suspect that your kid will turn out fine, and that he's better off learning that he has some freedom over what he puts into his body than being forced to drink something he doesn't want.
posted by croutonsupafreak at 7:24 AM on September 11, 2007

I'm another non-drinker. With the exception of a fierce once-yearly craving for fresh from the oven underdone brownies and several small ice cold glasses of milk, I have serious textural issues with milk and always have. Soy milk is no improvement, either.

It definitely wasn't worth the battles my father waged over it.

You could try thinning yogurt to a drinkable consistency with milk/soy/goat. Drinking yogurt freaks me out, personally, but millions of other people seem to be okay with it.
posted by Lyn Never at 7:32 AM on September 11, 2007

I used to be slightly lactose intolerant but I still really liked milk. What cemented this fondness for milk was probably eating delicious, sugary cereal. If you haven't already give him some Cinnamon Toast Crunch or something, cause that's what always hits the spot for me.
posted by thelongcon at 7:38 AM on September 11, 2007

Chiming in on the anti milk brigade - he really doesn't need it and, hey, it's really not all that good for kids, no matter what your mother says. I have two kids; one, the first one, loved milk and one hated it. Milk drinking child had eternal and repeated ear infections and colds. Non milk drinking child never got sick. Yes, anecdotal - but I also watched my friend, whose first child never drank milk and never got sick, while her second child drank milk and was always sniffling. I hated milk myself; still do, and the memories of being forced to sit at the dinner table until I had choked down an entire glass of the evil stuff are not my fondest. Pick your battles - your baby will be totally fine without milk.
posted by mygothlaundry at 7:40 AM on September 11, 2007

I hated milk as a kid. HATED. Still hate it. Turns out I'm deathly allergic to it.

Please don't push it. Diluted juice is fine and so are your calcium alternatives.
posted by agregoli at 7:45 AM on September 11, 2007

If he won't drink milk, see this list of calcium- and magnesium-rich foods (scroll down) if you want to avoid sugary juices. Somewhere between 15 and 20% of Caucasians are lactose-intolerant (higher apparently if you're of Mediterranean ancestry). Yogurt and cheese have much lower levels of lactose (aged cheeses in particular have virtually none), which is why he can eat them even if he's intolerant. Or, it could just be a toddler-type "No!" Good luck!
posted by rtha at 7:51 AM on September 11, 2007

Thanks for the responses, everyone.
posted by Xazeru at 7:51 AM on September 11, 2007

hey, it's really not all that good for kids, no matter what your mother says.

Care to offer any support for that statement? That is, care to offer any scientific support for that statement?
posted by electroboy at 7:54 AM on September 11, 2007

I'll second the advice about making sure there are no allergies, often kids can't quite explain why they don't want something but it could be making them miserable. I'd say go with the other suggestions made about alternate calcium sources, and if you're still having issues talk to your pediatrician.
posted by mattholomew at 8:00 AM on September 11, 2007

Our daughter wasn't too interested in milk until we taught her how to sign for it. It's now one of her favourites.
posted by RibaldOne at 8:08 AM on September 11, 2007

Try pudding. You can make your own cooked pudding using corn starch if you don't want to use instant packaged products.

Yogurt, cheese and perhaps milk-based smoothies might work, too.

If you really can't get your little one to consume 2c of milk products a day using a variety of methods, talk to your doctor/pediatrician. Certainly, it's possible to raise your child without having milk drinks, but you'd want to make sure that your child is doing okay without it.
posted by acoutu at 8:24 AM on September 11, 2007

I also hated milk but loved vegetables. Milk's pretty intense; it was served to us with lunch at school, I could only ever handle the skim milk, and even that was never my favorite. Ugh. I'm pretty sure that dislike is why I'm now the skinniest one in my family.

I dated a guy who *loved* milk. He'd drink huge quantities of it. He was also diabetic.

The link between milk and diabetes is not entirely without controversy, however.
posted by amtho at 8:25 AM on September 11, 2007

According to my son's allergist, the only milk allergy that can be confirmed with any type of test is an anaphylactic milk allergy. So if your son is eating cheese and yogurt and hasn't gone into shock, he isn't "allergic to milk." He may have a milk protein intolerance (sometimes called milk protein allergy) but there is no test that can confirm that. But again, if he eats other dairy and doesn't have constipation or diarrhea, it's probably not that either. Lactose intolerance makes sense. Or maybe he just hates milk - I think it's disgusting and never liked the taste as a kid.
posted by peep at 8:33 AM on September 11, 2007

Rice pudding, perhaps? As a kid I never drank milk either, but I'd eat a whole bowl of rice soaked in milk and sugar!
posted by wackybrit at 8:39 AM on September 11, 2007

Our son never got a taste for milk either. Not really an allergy, since he eats cheese and stuff. To supplement the calcium he might be missing from not drinking milk, we give him calcium-enriched orange juice.

We worry, though, that it might be stunting his growth. You see, he's only 6'-3", and his brother, who loves milk, is 6'-5".

In other words, don't worry about it too much.
posted by Doohickie at 9:34 AM on September 11, 2007

I didn't like milk when I was a kid, either. The doctor told my mom to give me chocolate milk. (Of course this was in the mid-eighties. I'm sure everything is completely wrong now.)
posted by Green Eyed Monster at 9:41 AM on September 11, 2007

My toddler LOVES kefir (sort of like thin, drinkable yogurt, with probiotic cultures, often mixed with fruit). It's not available in all grocery stores, but it's worth looking into as another source of calcium.
posted by lisa g at 9:59 AM on September 11, 2007

My daughter doesn't drink milk AT ALL. The only dairy that she will tolerate is yogurt, so we give that to her and make sure she gets lots of calcium-rich veggies and her daily vitamin. Don't stress about the milk thing. Stick with what your tot does enjoy and don't worry about the not liking milk. Sneak in milk when you can - on cereal or whatever. But even that's not necessary.
posted by Sassyfras at 10:04 AM on September 11, 2007

You could try making fruit smoothies. Just chuck a couple of pieces of frozen fruit in a blender with some milk. If your kid won't drink it, then you can (because it's tasty).
posted by crazycanuck at 10:45 AM on September 11, 2007

I don't understand this thread. The poster asks "How do I get my kid to drink milk?"

And she gets 30 comments lecturing her on how milk is bad for you and causes cancer or tapeworms or diabetes.

But apparently that's cool. (????)

Have you tried mixing milk and yogurt (and possibly some fruit)? I wonder if your boy's preference for juice over milk doesn't have to do with a preference for tart foods over bland ones-- I never disliked milk, but I used to really like yogurt blended with enough milk that it was of drinkable consistency. Yum!
posted by thehmsbeagle at 10:54 AM on September 11, 2007 [1 favorite]

Backups on milk maybe not being as great for kids as has long been believed, as requested:

Vegetarian & Vegan Foundation
American Academy of Pediatrics on allergies - scroll down to the list of most commonly allergenic foods. Btw, they don't recommend giving any child under one year straight cow's milk.
Ecomall.
Good Health on a study that shows calcium is a) better absorbed through plant foods and b) lack of milk does not lead to weaker bones.
Alternative Health & Healing
posted by mygothlaundry at 11:07 AM on September 11, 2007

According to my son's allergist, the only milk allergy that can be confirmed with any type of test is an anaphylactic milk allergy. So if your son is eating cheese and yogurt and hasn't gone into shock, he isn't "allergic to milk."

Totally wrong. I was VERY allergic to milk as a child, less so now, but I never had an anaphylactic reaction (if you're meaning shock in the "not breathing" sense). Allergies are strange, people can have very many different reactions, and also they can build on each other - I might have had milk twice in two days, but the third time is when I had vomiting, diaherria, etc. Please don't trust this advice - allergies come in all shapes and sizes and this doesn't hold true for myself or my family's allergies (also confirmed and treated many times by our own allergist).

Regardless, as others have noted, milk isn't necessary - there is calcium in many foods. Also, being allergic to milk is different from lactose intolerance.
posted by agregoli at 11:42 AM on September 11, 2007

(It very well may be true that you can't test for a milk allergy - but a milk allergy doesn't have to manifest in full on shock, is my drift).
posted by agregoli at 11:43 AM on September 11, 2007

I didn't like certain foods as a kid, notably onions and tomatoes (spaghetti sauce and ketchup was fine). My parents didn't really force them on me and I do like them quite a bit now-always have onions around for cooking and like to eat to eat tasty raw tomatoes in the summer. So my only advice is don't try and force it because I suspect that might make him never ever drink milk. You could ask him to try some every so often but make it clear that he doesn't have to drink it if he doesn't like it.

But do make sure he gets his calcium. While the anti-milk faction may have a point as to it's overall healthfullness most people I know that don't drink milk don't make any effort to get calcium from other sources. And, since I see women generally drink far less milk than men as adults I wonder if that plays a factor in why women have higher rates of osteoporosis. My mom, who only ever has a small amount of milk in coffee, developed the pre-condition, though medication has turned that around and she's gotten bone density back. Her mother, always a milk drinker, does not have it at all.
posted by 6550 at 11:46 AM on September 11, 2007

agregoli, it doesn't sound at all like you understand what I'm talking about. "Maybe your son is allergic to milk and you should have him tested" is a pointless statement. Here's why. My son has fairly severe milk protein intolerance. He can't eat milk or dairy. The reason I know this is because when he was a baby and I drank milk while nursing him, he pooped blood. Also, now that he's a toddler, dairy gives him explosive diarrhea, sometimes bloody.

But there is no test that any doctor can give my son that will positively indicate that there is any reason he shouldn't consume dairy. He has been skin-prick and RAST tested for all sorts of things - every last test was 100% negative. Sometimes there is no test. You just have to deal with trial and error.
posted by peep at 12:14 PM on September 11, 2007

Practically, and putting aside all the milk-good/milk-bad/allergy issues: my general advice for any kind of food introduction (it's worked well for me but the baby world is so massively anecdotal): stop shopping around variations. Toddlers need to get used to things through repetitive, intermittent, non-aggressive exposure. Pick something basic, like plain 2%, and keep introducing it. I don't make a big deal about eating or not eating anything and for me, anyway, the upshot is that he eats most anything. I guess my only rule is that I don't replace a declined food with a "treat." You might want to give only water if milk is declined.

There are foods my 3-year-old is eating now that I gave him 3-4 times a week for months. He may just not go for it and I agree with others that you can work with that, just be aware of calcium alternatives. Not based on personal experience, several parents I've known mentioned going to something like a kefir or yogurt smoothie type product their child found more palatable than milk. Keep an eye on added sugars with those, though.

Finally, someone raised sugar content of juice versus milk. Milk has a bit less than half the sugar content of juice. The sugar in juice is primarily fructose which is arguably worse for you than others. There are lots of other dietary opportunities to cut fructose, if you eat processed foods at all.
posted by nanojath at 1:18 PM on September 11, 2007

Backups on milk maybe not being as great for kids as has long been believed, as requested:


Fail.

1. Come on, the Vegetarian and Vegan Foundation? For your next trick are you going to convince me that smoking isn't harmful by citing Philip Morris studies?

2. Yes, milk is a possible allergen, along with peanuts, soy, pet dander, wheat and mold. And yes, cow's milk is not appropriate for infants, but we're not talking about an infant.

3. This article is filled with gems such as this: Cow's milk is pasteurized, a process that kills the bacteria present up to that point; what most of us forget is that all those dead bacteria are still floating in the milk.

4. Those poor, poor strawmen. What did they ever do to deserve this?

5. In summary, we found that the vast majority of controlled studies of dairy supplementation or total dietary calcium intake show that, while very low calcium intakes (e.g., below 400 mg per day) may be harmful to bone development, increases in dairy or total dietary calcium intake (above 400 to 500 mg per day) are not correlated with, or a predictor of, bone mineral density or fracture rate in children or young adults.
posted by electroboy at 1:48 PM on September 11, 2007 [1 favorite]

If my son is anything to go by, attempting to trick him, or talk him, or bribe him, or command him into eating or drinking something he doesn't want has been very unsuccessful. In the end, we just tend to let it go for a while, and then just subtly offer it again. No pressure, or attention, just put it on his plate or something.

It's worked well with something, and not well with others.
posted by sycophant at 3:52 PM on September 11, 2007

[a few comments removed - please take your performace art and your off-topic milk opinions someplace else, thank you.]
posted by jessamyn at 4:06 PM on September 11, 2007

Try adding Bosco to his milk - yum!
posted by scottso17 at 5:33 PM on September 11, 2007

I never liked drinking milk as a kid (and still don't, except with brownies), but I do eat it on my cereal - I think it changes the texture. I don't understand if you mean he asks for juice when given milk on his cereal? That to me would suggest that you're making some kind of production out of it being milk instead of saying 'here's breakfast, eat up!'.

If you really want him to have milk, I'd make porridge with milk in it (can add honey/raisins/other dried fruit/etc til it doesn't have a trace of milk flavour), perhaps starting with a thick porridge and moving to a more liquid version until there was actual milkiness in it.
posted by jacalata at 6:22 PM on September 11, 2007