unable to perform thy terms too hard
August 27, 2007 10:41 AM Subscribe
I really really dislike doing things. This goes all the way ad absurdum in that I actually would rather freeze into nothingness than deal with college, work, chores, and so on.
posted by raisons de coeur to grab bag (21 answers total) 53 users marked this as a favorite
I assume this isn't normal. What to do?
I'm coming round to thinking I need to unplug and get help since I haven't snapped out of it all these years but it just seems so lame an issue, there's the internal disciplinarian saying "stop being lazy and it'll be ok"--and I stay skeptical of the capacity of external help to address something so mundanely internal.
I guess my question is "oh god what's wrong with me!", or more specifically whether you find this indicative of a particular pathology or dysfunction you're familiar with.
It's so frustrating because all the structural components to crawling back on track are laid out for me, but however resolute I get, I keep betraying trusts--mine own and other people's--and staying on one side of the bridge. It stings so badly when for example at work someone says "can you do this now? are you back? are we gonna kick ass?" and I'm all like "yeah!" and then flicker out again.
The irritating part is that this is independent of the nature of the task in question, they just all weigh down on me as numbingly boring.
It's all so greasy, dank and dreary, man. wtf.