Help me deal with my evil boss.
June 11, 2007 7:38 PM Subscribe
Asking for a friend: HELP! My boss is wrecking my well being and my chance of moving on. (quasi-long post)
posted by o0dano0o to Work & Money (22 answers total) 5 users marked this as a favorite
Asking for a friend...
"A few months ago I started my job working as an Aide for a State Legislator. Contrary to my initial impressions, the job is going nowhere fast and my boss turned out to be verbally and mentally abusive as well as extremely controlling – eg. All questions I ask are “stupid and so am I for asking them”, everyone finds out about my mistakes except for me, and how dare I try to take lunch while my boss is in the office?! My boss has a history of aides quitting very soon after starting, but since I’ve been able to work with difficult people before this I thought I could handle the challenge. This was a mistake.
A few weeks ago I set up a meeting with my boss to discuss our expectations of one another, how things were going, and how I could improve upon the job. Up until the meeting I had been under the impression that I was doing really well there. My boss went on a rant about how since I started “everything has been one big f*** up after another” and when I asked how I could do better all my boss could tell me was that I was to blame for everything. The meeting with my boss confirmed two things: trying to discuss the concept of being a “team” would not work and I needed to high-tail it out of there – AND soon. I have never had a boss tell me I was a “poor employee” or question my work ethic before, and I have since felt worthless and like I am a bad person. I sometimes feel that maybe I am a bad worker since it’s been so hard for me to stay focused and motivated.
I have decided that it is no longer in my best psychological interest to stay working for my boss, but have found that in applying for other positions within the Legislature that the possibility of my boss’ wrath at someone else “stealing” his/her (have to maintain anonymity here) slave is a very real deterrent toward my being hired by another Legislator (this has been openly acknowledged during at least one interview that I have had there for a position I did not get). Politics as usual, it seems. It may be a possibility that I will not be able to continue working for other Legislators because of my working for my boss. This is disappointing because I like the job itself, but because of the awful experience I have had there, I don’t think I’ll be too sad to leave.
The longer I stay, the more I’m terrified that my boss will find out I’m applying elsewhere within – even though I’ve taken every precaution to keep things secret, the walls will always have ears. I want to leave now but I know from experience that it is harder to find a job when unemployed. Prior to this job I had one year of administrative experience (I left because I relocated) and four months of admin temp-work after relocating. Before that I was working full time to put myself through college full time for two years.
And so, me-fi peoples, I ask for your assistance in a situation that is unlike any other I’ve found myself in yet. Thank you!"