Subvert Christmas

December 13, 2006 7:32 AM

Help me find subversive Christmas videos, music and other media.

I like to enjoy Christmas in my own kind of way. Usually this involves healthy amounts of cynicism, dark humour and the subversion of traditional Christmas values. Please help me find (preferrably online) videos, music, articles, pictures, films etc. that subvert the traditional christmas archetypes. The funnier the better, I'm not really looking for academic articles.

A few examples:

Redubbed XMas specials
Songs similar to the ones listed here (especially the Vindictives cover of Nuttin For Christmas)
This TV advert
Recently on mefi: 1 & 2.
Bad Santa, Nightmare Before Christmas and Gremlins are a few films I can think of that fit the mould.

posted by slimepuppy to grab bag (24 answers total)

Merry Christmas
From Chiron Beta Prime
Where we’re working in a mine
For our robot overlords.
Did I say overlords? I meant protectors.

--Jonathan Coulton, Chiron Beta Prime
posted by Horace Rumpole at 7:38 AM on December 13, 2006

Jack Frost. In it an evil snow man humps a pre-American Pie Shannon Elizabeth to death in a shower.

More here.
posted by JeremiahBritt at 7:39 AM on December 13, 2006

Also, "Santa Clause is Smoking Reefer" by the Squirrel Nut Zippers and "Christmas at Ground Zero" by Weird Al.
posted by JeremiahBritt at 7:42 AM on December 13, 2006

Try Bob Rivers Twisted Christmas Tunes.
posted by rsclark at 7:45 AM on December 13, 2006

IMO, you won't find anything much better than The Spirit of Christmas, which was actually a pilot of sorts for South Park. It fits your criteria perfectly.
posted by jtfowl0 at 7:54 AM on December 13, 2006

That video is NSFW, by the way.
posted by jtfowl0 at 7:58 AM on December 13, 2006

Check out Jethro Tull's The Jethro Tull Christmas Album. Very funny and largely subversive lyrics, and it's good music to boot.
posted by TheNewWazoo at 8:26 AM on December 13, 2006

Stan Freberg's Green Chri$tma$ is the standard.
posted by Kirth Gerson at 9:05 AM on December 13, 2006

It's Christmas at Ground Zero.

And, even better, The Night Santa Went Crazy.

Down in the workshop all the elves were making toys
For the good Gentile girls and the good Gentile boys
When the boss busted in, nearly scared 'em half to death
Had a rifle in his hands and cheap whiskey on his breath
From his beard to his boots he was covered with ammo
Like a big fat drunk disgruntled Yuletide Rambo
And he smiled as he said with a twinkle in his eye
"Merry Christmas to all - now you're all gonna die!"
posted by jellicle at 9:11 AM on December 13, 2006

Nothing adds to the joy and merriment of Christmas like Cthulhu. Two CDs of H.P. Lovecraft inspired solstice carols.
posted by tula at 9:14 AM on December 13, 2006

Those Weird Al songs from jellicle are pretty classic.

You could check out "Bizarre Christmas Incident" by Ben Folds Five. It's not particularly clever or funny -- in fact, it's a little juvenile -- but it fits the criteria about being "dark" and "about Christmas." It involves Santa getting burned to death in a chimney:

"Santa, he's a big, fat fuck
went down the chimney, got his fat ass stuck
oh, honey call the lawyers fast,
Mrs. Claus is gonna sue our ass"

Also, if you'll allow a self-link, here's a cynical Christmas story about the life and ministry of Santa. The "Passion of the Claus" if you will. Although I suppose a truly dark writer would have detailed his crucifixion...this one's just about his "life and ministry."
posted by Milkman Dan at 9:21 AM on December 13, 2006

Santarchy!!!!!!
posted by micayetoca at 10:08 AM on December 13, 2006

Do (very) short stories count? If so, see "Nicholas Was..." by Neil Gaiman. (The page is labeled as "Excerpt," but that's only true insofar as it's an excerpt of the entire book listed, which is a collection of short stories. What you see there is the whole story.)
posted by DevilsAdvocate at 10:23 AM on December 13, 2006

Fear!
posted by Max Power at 10:32 AM on December 13, 2006

The Xmas in Frisko music stream at http://somafm.com/
posted by found dog one eye at 10:44 AM on December 13, 2006

Not sure it really qualifies; it's actually pretty pro-Christmas and kind of warm and fuzzy in its own way. It is, however, deeply satrical and terribly funny: Robert Earl Keen's "Merry Christmas From the Family."
posted by Clay201 at 11:07 AM on December 13, 2006

Futurama has had several subversive Christmas episodes. Their Santa is a robotic killing machine that forces everyone to hide in fear with their loved ones. Several remixed lyrics of traditional songs, to boot.

One episode was pulled from air for having a similar "Kwanzaabot" that was deemed too controversial, apparently.
posted by cowbellemoo at 11:53 AM on December 13, 2006

A John Waters Christmas has some good offbeat tunes, especially AKIM and the Teddy Vann Production Company's "Santa Claus is a Black Man."
posted by gargoyle93 at 12:02 PM on December 13, 2006

There are some good songs on these albums:

Oi to the World! by the Vandals (briefly mentioned on the mix tape link)
Happy Birthday, Baby Jesus - V/A

You can find both on iTunes and emusic.
posted by puritycontrol at 1:23 PM on December 13, 2006

On a more homemade note, my wife and I sent this video we made as our Christmas card last year. I wouldn't say it's dark, but a bit cynical, perhaps. And hopefully, funny.
posted by coondognd at 1:35 PM on December 13, 2006

How about the Chris "Christmas" Rodriguez spots?
posted by chimmyc at 3:17 PM on December 13, 2006

The Arrogant Worms have some off-kilter Christmas stuff, and lots of weird Canada stuff. Might not be quite what you're looking for but it's worth a try.
posted by Myself at 9:08 PM on December 13, 2006

Possibly the greatest anti-christmas song of all time is Tom Waits and Peter Murphy doing "Christmas Sucks". My personal long standing favorite, though, is Rocket From The Crypt's "Cancel Christmas".
posted by team lowkey at 2:35 AM on December 14, 2006

Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics.
posted by AstroGuy at 8:44 AM on December 14, 2006