How to Defunk a Phone Handset

August 14, 2006 5:24 AM

The phone on my desk at work is a hand-me-down and has seen *many* users before me, and the handset smells horrible. Replacing the handset is not a viable option. How can I get the odor out?
posted by Cordelya to grab bag (11 comments total)

Perhaps Febreze? If you can take it apart, a good cleaning of the plastic bits in the sink could also work.
posted by Malor at 5:28 AM on August 14, 2006

"Accidentally" drop something heavy on it, and get a new phone.
posted by Hogshead at 5:31 AM on August 14, 2006

Yeah, take it apart and go nuts with some sort of evaporative glass cleaner. If you instead use something water-based (e.g. soap and water), then let it lay in parts over night before putting it together and plugging the handset back in. So do it the last thing before you leave work for the day.
posted by intermod at 5:39 AM on August 14, 2006

Does the handset attach with a cable with push in clips? If so, just swap it for another.
posted by A189Nut at 5:39 AM on August 14, 2006

Telephone cleaning products. I used to work in Stationary for a large organisation and was initially amazed that such products existed. They're useful though. If your workplace is big they might already have a stock of ComputerBath Power Cleaner & Protectant or some other fantastically named product.
posted by handee at 5:40 AM on August 14, 2006

From a Health & Safety point of view, your employer ought not to expect you to use a scuzzy phone. I would ask your employer to arrange for it to be cleaned, or to provide you with a new phone.
posted by essexjan at 6:11 AM on August 14, 2006

@essexjan: you make a good point. Unfortunately, I work for the government, where scuzzy equipment is the rule, not the exception
posted by Cordelya at 6:41 AM on August 14, 2006

Wipe down the handset with with a paper towel soaked in windex or rubbing alcohol --- whenever I do this, I am astonished at the yick that comes off. If there is crud built up in the little speaker-holes (hard to believe, but I have seen it), you might need a pipe cleaner or a toothpick.
posted by Elsa at 7:11 AM on August 14, 2006

If you are in a position to be devious, do so. Swap the handset with another person's handset, for example, or yank on the wires on your handset so you loosen or break a connection, then report it.
posted by pracowity at 7:16 AM on August 14, 2006

You can easily disassemble most telephone handsets with only a medium-small Phillips screwdriver (or if it is old enough, just your bare hands). Look for screws in the flat part between the speaker and the microphone. They may be hidden under a sticker or rubber grommets, as you can see in this image. The microphone is on the left.



Once you've opened the handset, remove the microphone, which will be secured with two small phillips screws and should also be held in place by some glue or a rubber gasket. This is where the really terrible stuff will be. Clean it with rubbing alcohol. You'll likely have unidentifiable goo, hairs, and crumbs in there. Have a toothpick ready to clean the holes.

As you probably already know, the terrible smell is coming from the stuff inside this cavity. Clean it thoroughly and then clean the outside of the phone with rubbing alcohol. No other solvents or cleaners should be necessary at all. Febreeze and other cleaners were not meant for this usage, may mar the plastic or even make the smell worse.

If you want to clean the microphone directly, it will resist the rubbing alcohol just fine and continue functioning, but do not immerse it or get the alchohol inside of the mic, as it contains water and will eventually cause corrosion.

If you find that there are no screws, your phone may be held together with plastic clips. Using a flat screwdriver, carefully pry at the edges of the handset where the two halves meet. You will eventually see these clips. The trick to opening them is to pry one side of this seam horizontally from the other.

Good luck.
posted by fake at 7:33 AM on August 14, 2006

If all else fails, I believe Douglas Adams may have left behind the names and numbers of some telephone sanitizers.

We're assuming this is some sort of non-standard phone, and that's why you can't replace the handset.

The topline solution would be to disassemble it as far as possible, and clean the parts in an ultrasonic cleaner, using a liquid unlikely to hang around and cause problems. I forget what they usually use; some sort of freon-derivative, I think, but 99% alcohol would probably be good enough.

The ultrasonic cleaner is likely to do a much more thorough job than anything else you can use, if you can find one.
posted by baylink at 1:23 PM on August 14, 2006