Prioritize my life-fixing, please.
August 9, 2006 9:54 AM Subscribe
What should I start first: personal or couples counselling? Or does it matter?
posted by Zozo to health & fitness (14 answers total) 2 users marked this as a favorite
My girlfriend and I are going through a pretty shitty time, both individually and together. We're fighting way too much, and even when we're not, things are tense and awkward and far from ideal.
We've struggled with communications issues throughout our four-year relationship, but we don't feel that it's a deal-breaker issue: a good professional should be able to help us figure out how to get back to dealing with each other and with our problems like grown-ups. Once I've got my schedule for the upcoming semester hammered out, we're going to make an appointment with a relationship counsellor—for free, even, thanks to my girlfriend's employer.
Thing is, I could really use some one-on-one time with a therapist, too. That same benefits package will get me (as a domestic partner) individual therapy, and I'm confident that I'll finally be able to lick a lot of my long-standing issues. Looking forward to it, even.
Does it matter which comes first? Should I sort out my own shit before trying to improve things with my girlfriend, or should I get my proverbial house in order before I start attacking my inner demons? Would working on them simultaneously be beneficial or detrimental? Am I just overthinking a non-issue?