What are the advantages of learning disorders?
January 26, 2024 6:43 PM
After a workshop on helping your child with executive function, and going through a very depressingly long list of all the deficits associated with dyslexia, dyscalculia, ADH, autism, and the rest of the alphabet of neurodivergence - I want to know what are the benefits? Searching for this gives vague 'creativity! diversity' answers.
Hyperfocus and pattern recognition (an autistic trait) both have their benefits; a tendency to jump around and skim on top of lots of information (ADHD) can be helpful for making connections. The (unknown) compensating skills I developed for my own weak attention span and tendency to forget tasks turned me into literally a professional project manager who regularly gets "you're so organized!" - turns out no one can remember every step in a precision process every time, and those of us who learned early to use checklists and make flow charts and repeat things back to make sure we understood them end up at an advantage when everyone else reaches the end of their own natural ability.
posted by Lady Li at 7:12 PM on January 26
posted by Lady Li at 7:12 PM on January 26
So many amazing musicians I work with have one or many of these traits. Not just OK musicians, amazing ones.
posted by capnsue at 7:42 PM on January 26
posted by capnsue at 7:42 PM on January 26
Pretty much the only meaningful success I've had for most of my life (in the capitalist "doing something that someone will pay money for" sense) has been through explicitly making use of my neurodivergence -- and inversely, I think those things have been valued precisely because they're not just things "anyone can do".
I suspect a large part of this was that the mix of hyperfocus and extreme curiosity I had as a kid led to me developing a lot of unusual skills at a young age, which is not something you can usually force (if someone's not interested, they generally just aren't going to learn much). There's also the pattern-recognition mentioned above, as well as just certain modes of thinking that seem to be more suitable for certain tasks. It's hard to put into words how it works, but it does.
I feel like the "downsides" primarily arise when you try to forcibly take someone (or yourself) who is much much not "normal" and try to force them into a "normal" box, which is like shoving a triangle into the square hole and then complaining that the triangle is bad compared to the square because you needed to push it so hard to make it fit. Of course, it's possible (to some degree) to grow past many of these limitations, but the key word is grow; it's not something that you can force someone through, and the effective coping mechanisms might not always be what you think they are.
posted by etealuear_crushue at 7:43 PM on January 26
I suspect a large part of this was that the mix of hyperfocus and extreme curiosity I had as a kid led to me developing a lot of unusual skills at a young age, which is not something you can usually force (if someone's not interested, they generally just aren't going to learn much). There's also the pattern-recognition mentioned above, as well as just certain modes of thinking that seem to be more suitable for certain tasks. It's hard to put into words how it works, but it does.
I feel like the "downsides" primarily arise when you try to forcibly take someone (or yourself) who is much much not "normal" and try to force them into a "normal" box, which is like shoving a triangle into the square hole and then complaining that the triangle is bad compared to the square because you needed to push it so hard to make it fit. Of course, it's possible (to some degree) to grow past many of these limitations, but the key word is grow; it's not something that you can force someone through, and the effective coping mechanisms might not always be what you think they are.
posted by etealuear_crushue at 7:43 PM on January 26
My autistic curiosity about how the world works and my "bottom-up thinking" that led me to need to understand things entirely in order to "get it" at all led to me getting a PhD in theoretical physics and becoming a professor. My autistic hyper-empathy and lack of perception of social hierarchy (and child-like enthusiasm) mean that I am apparently really good at "connecting" with students when they come talk to me.
Once one escapes the social hellscape of primary and secondary education, academia turns out to be a great environment for autistic people.
posted by heatherlogan at 8:08 PM on January 26
Once one escapes the social hellscape of primary and secondary education, academia turns out to be a great environment for autistic people.
posted by heatherlogan at 8:08 PM on January 26
I feel like the "downsides" primarily arise when you try to forcibly take someone (or yourself) who is much much not "normal" and try to force them into a "normal" box, which is like shoving a triangle into the square hole and then complaining that the triangle is bad compared to the square because you needed to push it so hard to make it fit.
This summarizes all the problems I've had for years. Like the entire issue is that you don't fit with the rest of the world and how it works, and at best you have to find the other weirdos who are fine with you being a weirdo. Once you are in the weirdo pack, you're probably doing pretty well.
I personally like being able to multitask and do a bunch of things at once. It's really fun.
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:02 PM on January 26
This summarizes all the problems I've had for years. Like the entire issue is that you don't fit with the rest of the world and how it works, and at best you have to find the other weirdos who are fine with you being a weirdo. Once you are in the weirdo pack, you're probably doing pretty well.
I personally like being able to multitask and do a bunch of things at once. It's really fun.
posted by jenfullmoon at 9:02 PM on January 26
Very difficult to answer this while ignoring the context, or accepting the context as an unchangeable and neutral default.
Is there a silent "benefit... in our abelist, capitalist system that only values people who can work to increase shareholder value" at the end of your question, or is there a "benefit ... to the individual themselves, their friends and loved ones, to culture, human knowledge, and the natural world?"
Some aspects of being neurodivergent are disabling regardless of society (problems with executive function and volition are extremely hard to live with no matter the context)
Many are only deficits because they are qualities that are awkward in our current context where systems refuse to make space for people who are different. For example, dyslexia and dyscalcula would be as unimportant as having a non existent sense of direction, if our education system wasn't so locked into its limited way of teaching and assessing.
Highlighting the ways that neurodivergent traits can be beneficial is problematic, if you don't acknowledge that those benefits are often wrought at great cost to the individual, and exist despite our current education system.
posted by Zumbador at 9:10 PM on January 26
Is there a silent "benefit... in our abelist, capitalist system that only values people who can work to increase shareholder value" at the end of your question, or is there a "benefit ... to the individual themselves, their friends and loved ones, to culture, human knowledge, and the natural world?"
Some aspects of being neurodivergent are disabling regardless of society (problems with executive function and volition are extremely hard to live with no matter the context)
Many are only deficits because they are qualities that are awkward in our current context where systems refuse to make space for people who are different. For example, dyslexia and dyscalcula would be as unimportant as having a non existent sense of direction, if our education system wasn't so locked into its limited way of teaching and assessing.
Highlighting the ways that neurodivergent traits can be beneficial is problematic, if you don't acknowledge that those benefits are often wrought at great cost to the individual, and exist despite our current education system.
posted by Zumbador at 9:10 PM on January 26
Thom Hartman wrote a book called "ADHD: A Hunter in a Farmer’s World" His basic premise is that the characteristics of ADHD are well suited a person who survives as a hunter but a poor fit for a farmer. He argues that as our society shifted to valuing the skills that make a good farmer to the detriment of those who would be well equipped to be successful in a hunter's world.
posted by metahawk at 9:22 PM on January 26
posted by metahawk at 9:22 PM on January 26
ADHD can make one good at working under pressure. I used to think I was good at it because I procrastinated so much, it meant I had a lot of practice, and just got used to it. That may be a part of it, but as I learned more about ADHD I realized that I almost need the pressure, it makes me work better, because of how my brain works. This also translates well to staying calm under pressure.
A downside to that is I am not great at long term planning, which I need to do for my work (and life). Two things have helped with that. The first is that I have screwed myself over enough times by not planning, that I’ve gotten better at realizing when I need to, and gotten better at knowing when to ignore the part of my brain that says “you can wait until the last minute!” The second is learning about how my ADHD brain works. This isn’t for everyone, but having a better scientific/therapeutic idea of why my brain works certain ways has really helped me to identify when my ADHD wiring is affecting something, and if I need to let it do it’s thing, or consciously override it and do something differently. I would highly recommend looking into those brain mechanics for you/your kid if it sounds like it could help.
Good luck!
posted by sillysally at 9:42 PM on January 26
A downside to that is I am not great at long term planning, which I need to do for my work (and life). Two things have helped with that. The first is that I have screwed myself over enough times by not planning, that I’ve gotten better at realizing when I need to, and gotten better at knowing when to ignore the part of my brain that says “you can wait until the last minute!” The second is learning about how my ADHD brain works. This isn’t for everyone, but having a better scientific/therapeutic idea of why my brain works certain ways has really helped me to identify when my ADHD wiring is affecting something, and if I need to let it do it’s thing, or consciously override it and do something differently. I would highly recommend looking into those brain mechanics for you/your kid if it sounds like it could help.
Good luck!
posted by sillysally at 9:42 PM on January 26
If you're feeling down, the ADHD friend is the one who is going to drop what they're doing and do something absolutely ridiculous and silly with you, and you're going to feel a lot better as a consequence. They (we, ahem) can pull together something grand at the last minute like nobody's business.
We're also the ones who answer a lot of Ask Metafilter questions, I'm guessing.
The (unknown) compensating skills I developed for my own weak attention span and tendency to forget tasks turned me into literally a professional project manager who regularly gets "you're so organized!" - turns out no one can remember every step in a precision process every time, and those of us who learned early to use checklists and make flow charts and repeat things back to make sure we understood them end up at an advantage when everyone else reaches the end of their own natural ability.
Thank you, Lady Li, for this. What a gift to have this framing.
posted by bluedaisy at 10:37 PM on January 26
We're also the ones who answer a lot of Ask Metafilter questions, I'm guessing.
The (unknown) compensating skills I developed for my own weak attention span and tendency to forget tasks turned me into literally a professional project manager who regularly gets "you're so organized!" - turns out no one can remember every step in a precision process every time, and those of us who learned early to use checklists and make flow charts and repeat things back to make sure we understood them end up at an advantage when everyone else reaches the end of their own natural ability.
Thank you, Lady Li, for this. What a gift to have this framing.
posted by bluedaisy at 10:37 PM on January 26
People with dyslexia can be astonishingly good at systems thinking. I occasionally get the spidey sense that a student of mine is dyslexic when they're handing in essays that are clearly incredibly sophisticated in their analyses and understanding of a text, but messy as hell about laying out the step by step argument for their readers. Similarly, I've noticed dyslexics can read about a complicated series of historical events and put them all together easily to come to a larger analysis, but wouldn't have the first clue about specific dates or other minor details, even if they understand intuitively exactly how each component contributes to the larger whole.
posted by knucklebones at 12:40 AM on January 27
posted by knucklebones at 12:40 AM on January 27
It doesn't relate to executive function challenges, but other benefits may include a really powerful sense of right and wrong, and tenacity. Look at Greta Thunberg. She would never have done what she has without being autistic. Yes, like any characteristic this can backfire on you, but well harnessed you can change the world, or even just your own little piece of it. I suspect that many of the people that standout as heroes do so because were able to harness elements of neurodiversity.
Every characteristic that a human has can be a positive thing in the right place. The challenge is always to find the right place for you own mix.
posted by plonkee at 1:29 AM on January 27
Every characteristic that a human has can be a positive thing in the right place. The challenge is always to find the right place for you own mix.
posted by plonkee at 1:29 AM on January 27
Two things that stand out across the spectrum (no pun intended) are coping mechanisms and resilience.
Every neurodivergent adult I know has found ways of coping with their divergence using the types of mechanisms people have talked about above. That leads to a greater resilience; neurodivergent people are used to having to route round problems and adapt, so when we face a challenge (regardless of whether it's related to our neurodivergence) we're often better prepared to face it than non-neurodivergent people.
For autism specifically, I've found that my lack of social awareness and my instinct to treat everyone the same has lead to a lot of friendships with women. I don't see women as objects to be possessed, and their sexual attractiveness (whether that's high or low) is only one part of who they are. When you can see a whole person rather than just their looks it's much easier to develop meaningful relationships with them based on valuing them as a person. A lot of my non-neurodivergent male friends seem literally unable to comprehend how I can have so many female friends and not have slept with, or tried to sleep with, any of them.
As Jacen said, it's a struggle, and my early years were isolated and miserable. But overall I wouldn't trade my autism to be "normal" if it meant losing those enriching, joyous, wonderful relationships.
posted by underclocked at 3:04 AM on January 27
Every neurodivergent adult I know has found ways of coping with their divergence using the types of mechanisms people have talked about above. That leads to a greater resilience; neurodivergent people are used to having to route round problems and adapt, so when we face a challenge (regardless of whether it's related to our neurodivergence) we're often better prepared to face it than non-neurodivergent people.
For autism specifically, I've found that my lack of social awareness and my instinct to treat everyone the same has lead to a lot of friendships with women. I don't see women as objects to be possessed, and their sexual attractiveness (whether that's high or low) is only one part of who they are. When you can see a whole person rather than just their looks it's much easier to develop meaningful relationships with them based on valuing them as a person. A lot of my non-neurodivergent male friends seem literally unable to comprehend how I can have so many female friends and not have slept with, or tried to sleep with, any of them.
As Jacen said, it's a struggle, and my early years were isolated and miserable. But overall I wouldn't trade my autism to be "normal" if it meant losing those enriching, joyous, wonderful relationships.
posted by underclocked at 3:04 AM on January 27
I have Auditory Processing Disorder. Essentially, my ears are fine, but my brain is like a wonky computer that doesn't always correctly manage what I hear.
I wasn't diagnosed until my mid-30s, but many of my ad hoc coping strategies (like taking careful notes and then rattling things back to confirm I understood correctly) served me well at work and now in personal situations like doctor's appointments. I'm able to clarify misunderstandings on the spot, and a little notepad allows me to seem more imposing.
APD also means I focus in one-on-one conversations. I know I need to put in the extra effort.
And when my child was struggling with a speech delay, I was able to understand why she was so frustrated. And I'm her advocate as she navigates school.
APD is challenging in a lot of ways - group socializing is frustrating, particularly when there's a lot of cross-talk. And my brain gets full really fast from too much input.
But I've made it work.
posted by champers at 3:20 AM on January 27
I wasn't diagnosed until my mid-30s, but many of my ad hoc coping strategies (like taking careful notes and then rattling things back to confirm I understood correctly) served me well at work and now in personal situations like doctor's appointments. I'm able to clarify misunderstandings on the spot, and a little notepad allows me to seem more imposing.
APD also means I focus in one-on-one conversations. I know I need to put in the extra effort.
And when my child was struggling with a speech delay, I was able to understand why she was so frustrated. And I'm her advocate as she navigates school.
APD is challenging in a lot of ways - group socializing is frustrating, particularly when there's a lot of cross-talk. And my brain gets full really fast from too much input.
But I've made it work.
posted by champers at 3:20 AM on January 27
We are well-positioned to analyze social norms and recommendations from authority figures and disregard the ones that don't serve us well, such as ever going back to any similar workshop because apparently whatever value it maybe could have offered your family was drowned by ableism and judgement. Self-care is important and if stuff like that brings you down this bad (it does me too), then your kid is probably better off without you risking exposure to it. I know that's kind of a meta answer (ha) but I mean it too.
posted by teremala at 5:33 AM on January 27
posted by teremala at 5:33 AM on January 27
I volunteer as a support worker to a company of (adult) actors with learning disabilities and neurodivergence. One of them says that she thinks being autistic has made her a much more confident performer because she’s not too fussed what other people think about her (I realise this might not be the case for other autistic people - just her own perspective).
I’d also observe that, as a group, they’re all incredibly compassionate and tolerant of the wide variety of human ability and aptitude. Most of them have spent a lot of time in programmes with other people who have a huge variety of disabilities/neurodiversity and as a result, are truly gifted at accepting difference and unobtrusively, kindly, stepping in to help and support each other, and cheerlead for each other. Again, everyone is different, not saying that’s universal.
posted by penguin pie at 7:57 AM on January 27
I’d also observe that, as a group, they’re all incredibly compassionate and tolerant of the wide variety of human ability and aptitude. Most of them have spent a lot of time in programmes with other people who have a huge variety of disabilities/neurodiversity and as a result, are truly gifted at accepting difference and unobtrusively, kindly, stepping in to help and support each other, and cheerlead for each other. Again, everyone is different, not saying that’s universal.
posted by penguin pie at 7:57 AM on January 27
One of my students said, “I’m worried that having ADHD will mean I can’t be successful in grad school, and without even thinking, I blurted, “There are no neurotypicals in physics.” And I stand by it. My colleagues suggest that the statement should be broadened to academia in general.
The world needs all different kinds of brains. A certain type of neuroatypicality is prevalent in STEM. Those of us who have it can smell it from a mile away. After I have a 30 minute conversation with a student who is struggling in Physics 101, I can predict with high accuracy whether or not that kid is going to have a PhD in 10 years, because it doesn’t matter whether you’ve mastered algebra as an 18-year-old, what matters is how you think about the world around you, and a lot of that is down to how you experience the world.
I have to be grateful for my ADHD, because if you took it away from me, my brain would be very, very different. I mean, I’d rather not be time-blind and lose my keys constantly, but would it trade that for a brain that zags where neurotypical brains zag, instead of zigging? Hell, no.
Understanding my own disability has also really opened my mind when working with people with all kinds of difference, and shifted my mindset in teaching away from training students to conform with the culture that currently exists in STEM (white, male, tolerant of a certain type of neurodiversity but intolerant of many others) and instead helping each person explore their unique strengths.
posted by BrashTech at 10:00 AM on January 27
The world needs all different kinds of brains. A certain type of neuroatypicality is prevalent in STEM. Those of us who have it can smell it from a mile away. After I have a 30 minute conversation with a student who is struggling in Physics 101, I can predict with high accuracy whether or not that kid is going to have a PhD in 10 years, because it doesn’t matter whether you’ve mastered algebra as an 18-year-old, what matters is how you think about the world around you, and a lot of that is down to how you experience the world.
I have to be grateful for my ADHD, because if you took it away from me, my brain would be very, very different. I mean, I’d rather not be time-blind and lose my keys constantly, but would it trade that for a brain that zags where neurotypical brains zag, instead of zigging? Hell, no.
Understanding my own disability has also really opened my mind when working with people with all kinds of difference, and shifted my mindset in teaching away from training students to conform with the culture that currently exists in STEM (white, male, tolerant of a certain type of neurodiversity but intolerant of many others) and instead helping each person explore their unique strengths.
posted by BrashTech at 10:00 AM on January 27
People with dyslexia can be astonishingly good at systems thinking.
I wanted to add that I have a dyslexic student who discovered, with the help of one of my my amazing colleagues last semester, that they have an easier time if they draw little pictures or hieroglyphs rather than letters for variables in their algebra on their homework.
Honestly, I think that’s brilliant. My policy has always been that you can use whatever variables you want, as long as you define them clearly.
They say they feel like they’re getting away with something, but my response is that this field needs their brain because they are going to do amazing things—they’re one of the students that will have a PhD, probably, although it may take them a little while to realize it—and it’s my responsibility to train them to think, not to police their orthography.
posted by BrashTech at 10:20 AM on January 27
I wanted to add that I have a dyslexic student who discovered, with the help of one of my my amazing colleagues last semester, that they have an easier time if they draw little pictures or hieroglyphs rather than letters for variables in their algebra on their homework.
Honestly, I think that’s brilliant. My policy has always been that you can use whatever variables you want, as long as you define them clearly.
They say they feel like they’re getting away with something, but my response is that this field needs their brain because they are going to do amazing things—they’re one of the students that will have a PhD, probably, although it may take them a little while to realize it—and it’s my responsibility to train them to think, not to police their orthography.
posted by BrashTech at 10:20 AM on January 27
As someone who was once the child in this situation, this line of thinking might be ok if it's to make yourself feel a bit better about a the reality of a certain situation, but it's an extremely fucked up thing to tell a kid (and tell them, and tell them, and etc) "that thing that is going to make the rest of your life miserable? It's extremely good actually".
In fact, I'm finding myself getting angry reading these replies and imaging you, random internet person, telling your kid (or whomever) some of this stuff.
Sure, those things about me are surely a net-positive because there is a bright direct line between them and the upper-middle class lifestyle I have achieved, but up until my own child was born (because as a parent, I'll suffer through anything...) I would have traded it all away just to be someone who could bring themselves to pay attention in class for more than 90 seconds at time who didn't have to spend decades learning how to have natural normal human interactions with other people.
posted by Back At It Again At Krispy Kreme at 12:59 PM on January 27
In fact, I'm finding myself getting angry reading these replies and imaging you, random internet person, telling your kid (or whomever) some of this stuff.
Sure, those things about me are surely a net-positive because there is a bright direct line between them and the upper-middle class lifestyle I have achieved, but up until my own child was born (because as a parent, I'll suffer through anything...) I would have traded it all away just to be someone who could bring themselves to pay attention in class for more than 90 seconds at time who didn't have to spend decades learning how to have natural normal human interactions with other people.
posted by Back At It Again At Krispy Kreme at 12:59 PM on January 27
The ability to multitask effectively is something some people with ADHD have. The fact I could run multiple different and complicated projects and switch between them has served me well professionally.
Anecdotally, most of my cohort when I studied music who were skilled composers were somewhere on the spectrum.
posted by Candleman at 3:42 PM on January 27
Anecdotally, most of my cohort when I studied music who were skilled composers were somewhere on the spectrum.
posted by Candleman at 3:42 PM on January 27
+1 to "there are no neurotypicals in STEM". It is not the case that all neurodivergent people are successful in STEM, by any means. But I think a neurotypical person who wanted to be successful in science or software engineering or math would probably attempt to get there in part by acting more autistic to fit in socially, that's how prevalent those traits are.
posted by potrzebie at 4:08 PM on January 27
posted by potrzebie at 4:08 PM on January 27
Not being able to fit in with society at large can mean you are, sort of, freed from the expectation that you'll ever properly fit in or sync up with it. This can be awful, but if you can find other people who don't fit in to make common cause with, can be a blessing, too.
I wouldn't call it an advantage, exactly. More that there's nothing wrong with a life lived in the weird niches neurodiverse people end up finding or carving out for themselves.
posted by BungaDunga at 10:43 PM on January 27
I wouldn't call it an advantage, exactly. More that there's nothing wrong with a life lived in the weird niches neurodiverse people end up finding or carving out for themselves.
posted by BungaDunga at 10:43 PM on January 27
Got one that babbles nonsense syllables? Echolalia gives you a significant advantage in writing poetry, which in turn gives you a significant advantage in creating mnemonics.
Prosopagnasia trains your social skills, because when you can't tell people apart you get a lot of practice having conversations with strangers at just the right level so that you are warm and friendly and easily general small talk. You learn that midpoint where people who have talked to you before think you recognize them and people you have never seen before find you approachable, but that you have boundaries.
Autism is often associated with extremely strong systematizing skills and can provide so many skills in academics and logic that someone with those traits makes an extremely good engineer or programmer.
The difficulty that many autists have in feeling any social connection can be extremely helpful in several professions intolerable to people with strong empathy. They often make good surgeons, because they don't experience trauma cutting people open, and they often make good social workers and medical professionals because they are detached from their patients and clients enough that they don't suffer from compassion failure and burn out.
People on the spectrum often have a very strong sense of fairness and ethics, which can make them unusually compassionate and committed to justice.
People with visual processing difficulties often do better with audio information then average people with no visual processing issues.
People who stim can develop skills around the stimming. If they sing to stim, they will get practice singing with no pushing, and with a little training are going to have magnificent voice control. If they do kinetic puzzles they will get really good at that and develop wonderful 3D rotational abilities. Buy them more puzzles. If they doodle, you have an artist on your hands. If they like to have a piece of velour to stroke, give them a chance to learn to sew small fuzzy stuffed animals. If they have to watch Disney Cinderella every day after school to unwind, teach them about animation and how different visual effects are created. The creator of Studio Ghibli must have started somewhere. You never know if stimming by dragging a thumbnail across the teeth of a plastic comb can be parleyed into learning to play a stringed instrument or not, or parleyed into an interest in working with leaf springs and you won't know if you just take the comb away and tell them to stop it.
Many autistic people are highly tolerant of routines. If they find a good one they can stick to it for years. They often thrive on things like having peanut butter on toast for breakfast every day for ten years. Once they adapt to a routine they can often sustain it indefinitely without frustration.
Sensory processing disorders often go with abnormally good perception. The kid who is always bothered by sounds may be able to hear much better than normal, including hearing in registers that other people cannot. That kid is also more likely to have perfect pitch or other musical acuity skills.
Check your kid for party tricks. The doctor who diagnosed my son who was reading a comic while we were in the office, took the comic away from him and asked him to say what it said. He promptly recited back two pages of dialog, word for word. We just looked at each other. Emboldened by this, my son then revealed that he could quote from Tolkien too, and started with the first paragraph of LotR and kept going until stopped. We had no idea. He couldn't do this with stuff he wasn't personally delighted by, such as his Geography homework, but he could do it with stuff he loved. People with learning disabilities on the spectrum sometimes have phenomenal memories which they can access for things they really care about. We basically never saw him do this because we didn't see any reason to make her perform, but the talent was there and presumably still is.
People with speech production issues, stammerers and late talkers often have too rapid word production and cannot keep up with it. Teach them to touch type and at 65 wpm they are far better than average at writing fluency. Many kids with early speech production issues go on to become writers.
Antisocial people often do much better at things that take practice than people with strong social needs. The kid who overwhelms at the birthday party and sneaks off to their room after ten minutes of socializing is the kid who will not be distracted from putting in the thousands of hours of practice it requires to become a good musician, or artist, or researcher if any of those paths inspire them. Or they may just get their homework done because they are not chatting with their friends all evening.
Kids with delayed sleep phase disorder are also kids that often do well because, while they can't get up in time for school to save their life, they can quietly spend their evening working. This kind of kid is the one that thrives when taking evening courses. If a kid struggles with high school, they may excel when the can attend class after 6 PM. Many adults who have had to take night work due to delayed sleep phase disorder end up with a job that gives them a lot of down time that they can use constructively. Some of them end up working two jobs simultaneously, manning a desk in case a customer comes in, and meanwhile working on webdesign, or something like that.
Many times a disorder like dyscalculia is a pairing such as where the kid has terrible short term memory and can't memorize their times tables, but they can understand and remember the algorithms used to solve equations or do trigonometry with very little effort. If you find exactly what the weak areas are, you are not unlikely to find other areas that are equally strong.
Kids who tend not to be good at conforming are often protected from learning undesirable behaviour from other kids. The kid that is always distracted into going their own way and being out of step with the group is also the kid who is most likely to not join in when everybody starts picking on Judy, and might be the only one who doesn't go back into a burning building when everyone else assumes it was a false alarm and goes back to class. (Actual experience: It was winter and bloody cold, the fire truck arrived ten minutes after everyone had gone back inside, then smoke started pouring out of one of the stairwells and they went home, because it was clearly going to take awhile to put out.)
Many kids on the spectrum are developmentally delayed. This is not a bad thing. If the kid is held back until their development catches up, for by example starting grade one when they are seven going on eight instead of being six, being made to wait until their brain is now ready to learn to read, they will be developmentally advanced in some other areas, which adds up to them not struggling to keep up, but going through life being the most competent person in their cohort. It really, really does not matter if your kid starts university at twenty-one instead of eighteen, and can end up making their path easy instead of a struggle the whole way along.
Remember that strengths and weaknesses are usually two sides of the same coin. The kid that won't shut up is the kid that can develop strong verbal skills. The kid that is anxious is the kid that won't take stupid risks. The kid that won't do anything unless you give them a good reason is the kid that will learn why we do things and may argue their way into leading a union. The kid that rocks back and forth all the time is getting more cardio than the one who sits still. "Why can't you be normal?" is the wrong question to ask. The question is "How can you use that trait to be happier and to succeed at things?"
posted by Jane the Brown at 1:27 PM on January 28
Prosopagnasia trains your social skills, because when you can't tell people apart you get a lot of practice having conversations with strangers at just the right level so that you are warm and friendly and easily general small talk. You learn that midpoint where people who have talked to you before think you recognize them and people you have never seen before find you approachable, but that you have boundaries.
Autism is often associated with extremely strong systematizing skills and can provide so many skills in academics and logic that someone with those traits makes an extremely good engineer or programmer.
The difficulty that many autists have in feeling any social connection can be extremely helpful in several professions intolerable to people with strong empathy. They often make good surgeons, because they don't experience trauma cutting people open, and they often make good social workers and medical professionals because they are detached from their patients and clients enough that they don't suffer from compassion failure and burn out.
People on the spectrum often have a very strong sense of fairness and ethics, which can make them unusually compassionate and committed to justice.
People with visual processing difficulties often do better with audio information then average people with no visual processing issues.
People who stim can develop skills around the stimming. If they sing to stim, they will get practice singing with no pushing, and with a little training are going to have magnificent voice control. If they do kinetic puzzles they will get really good at that and develop wonderful 3D rotational abilities. Buy them more puzzles. If they doodle, you have an artist on your hands. If they like to have a piece of velour to stroke, give them a chance to learn to sew small fuzzy stuffed animals. If they have to watch Disney Cinderella every day after school to unwind, teach them about animation and how different visual effects are created. The creator of Studio Ghibli must have started somewhere. You never know if stimming by dragging a thumbnail across the teeth of a plastic comb can be parleyed into learning to play a stringed instrument or not, or parleyed into an interest in working with leaf springs and you won't know if you just take the comb away and tell them to stop it.
Many autistic people are highly tolerant of routines. If they find a good one they can stick to it for years. They often thrive on things like having peanut butter on toast for breakfast every day for ten years. Once they adapt to a routine they can often sustain it indefinitely without frustration.
Sensory processing disorders often go with abnormally good perception. The kid who is always bothered by sounds may be able to hear much better than normal, including hearing in registers that other people cannot. That kid is also more likely to have perfect pitch or other musical acuity skills.
Check your kid for party tricks. The doctor who diagnosed my son who was reading a comic while we were in the office, took the comic away from him and asked him to say what it said. He promptly recited back two pages of dialog, word for word. We just looked at each other. Emboldened by this, my son then revealed that he could quote from Tolkien too, and started with the first paragraph of LotR and kept going until stopped. We had no idea. He couldn't do this with stuff he wasn't personally delighted by, such as his Geography homework, but he could do it with stuff he loved. People with learning disabilities on the spectrum sometimes have phenomenal memories which they can access for things they really care about. We basically never saw him do this because we didn't see any reason to make her perform, but the talent was there and presumably still is.
People with speech production issues, stammerers and late talkers often have too rapid word production and cannot keep up with it. Teach them to touch type and at 65 wpm they are far better than average at writing fluency. Many kids with early speech production issues go on to become writers.
Antisocial people often do much better at things that take practice than people with strong social needs. The kid who overwhelms at the birthday party and sneaks off to their room after ten minutes of socializing is the kid who will not be distracted from putting in the thousands of hours of practice it requires to become a good musician, or artist, or researcher if any of those paths inspire them. Or they may just get their homework done because they are not chatting with their friends all evening.
Kids with delayed sleep phase disorder are also kids that often do well because, while they can't get up in time for school to save their life, they can quietly spend their evening working. This kind of kid is the one that thrives when taking evening courses. If a kid struggles with high school, they may excel when the can attend class after 6 PM. Many adults who have had to take night work due to delayed sleep phase disorder end up with a job that gives them a lot of down time that they can use constructively. Some of them end up working two jobs simultaneously, manning a desk in case a customer comes in, and meanwhile working on webdesign, or something like that.
Many times a disorder like dyscalculia is a pairing such as where the kid has terrible short term memory and can't memorize their times tables, but they can understand and remember the algorithms used to solve equations or do trigonometry with very little effort. If you find exactly what the weak areas are, you are not unlikely to find other areas that are equally strong.
Kids who tend not to be good at conforming are often protected from learning undesirable behaviour from other kids. The kid that is always distracted into going their own way and being out of step with the group is also the kid who is most likely to not join in when everybody starts picking on Judy, and might be the only one who doesn't go back into a burning building when everyone else assumes it was a false alarm and goes back to class. (Actual experience: It was winter and bloody cold, the fire truck arrived ten minutes after everyone had gone back inside, then smoke started pouring out of one of the stairwells and they went home, because it was clearly going to take awhile to put out.)
Many kids on the spectrum are developmentally delayed. This is not a bad thing. If the kid is held back until their development catches up, for by example starting grade one when they are seven going on eight instead of being six, being made to wait until their brain is now ready to learn to read, they will be developmentally advanced in some other areas, which adds up to them not struggling to keep up, but going through life being the most competent person in their cohort. It really, really does not matter if your kid starts university at twenty-one instead of eighteen, and can end up making their path easy instead of a struggle the whole way along.
Remember that strengths and weaknesses are usually two sides of the same coin. The kid that won't shut up is the kid that can develop strong verbal skills. The kid that is anxious is the kid that won't take stupid risks. The kid that won't do anything unless you give them a good reason is the kid that will learn why we do things and may argue their way into leading a union. The kid that rocks back and forth all the time is getting more cardio than the one who sits still. "Why can't you be normal?" is the wrong question to ask. The question is "How can you use that trait to be happier and to succeed at things?"
posted by Jane the Brown at 1:27 PM on January 28
They exaggerate the deficits in those workshops, I’m sure.
posted by haptic_avenger at 7:32 PM on January 28
posted by haptic_avenger at 7:32 PM on January 28
Am dyslexic. Born 1990. Did the whole learning to read thing from 1996 to 1999.
My mother spent a lot of time doing the flashcards and phonics with me, and encouraged me to read a lot, so I developed the habit of reading fiction and still love reading up to this day.
My brother is autistic. He used to obsessively watch TV (between ages 5 to 12-ish). Finally something clicked and he became serious about his studies. He also found a martial arts class around this time. His autistic tendencies wherein he needs a routine made him a conscientious person who is strong-willed in the face of obstacles.
I find that these learning differences/neurodiversity don't necessarily come with gifts. Any positive side effect is the direct effect of what you choose to do with it, but as a result, you can shape the outcome of having the issue.
posted by Didnt_do_enough at 8:25 PM on March 19
My mother spent a lot of time doing the flashcards and phonics with me, and encouraged me to read a lot, so I developed the habit of reading fiction and still love reading up to this day.
My brother is autistic. He used to obsessively watch TV (between ages 5 to 12-ish). Finally something clicked and he became serious about his studies. He also found a martial arts class around this time. His autistic tendencies wherein he needs a routine made him a conscientious person who is strong-willed in the face of obstacles.
I find that these learning differences/neurodiversity don't necessarily come with gifts. Any positive side effect is the direct effect of what you choose to do with it, but as a result, you can shape the outcome of having the issue.
posted by Didnt_do_enough at 8:25 PM on March 19
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posted by anadem at 7:03 PM on January 26