Help me come up with a plan for quitting?
November 5, 2023 10:35 PM Subscribe
I'm addicted to smoking weed and vaping nicotine. I struggle with anxiety/depression. I want to quit but feel overwhelmed at where to start.
I'm a woman in my mid-30s. I am actually in very good health by all metrics, live an otherwise pretty healthy lifestyle (moderate activity, lots of vegetables), have a good career etc. but I don't think vaping all day and smoking weed every night can be good for me in the long run. I also worry that my consumption of both is impacting my depression and anxiety, the managing of which is a lifelong battle for me. I take SSRIs which take the edge off but wonder if I would feel better without all the weed.
CANNABIS: I've been smoking weed casually since my teens. I was a party girl through my late 20s and as I gave up that lifestyle I replaced it with smoking weed at home. For the past several years I smoke every night after work and throughout the day on weekends. I keep making plans to quit and putting it off. Weed helps me tune out my job stress, relax, and enjoy creative pursuits and I worry that I won't be able to cope with stress without it.
But, I also worry that it is making me more depressed and anxious (I do get paranoid sometimes when I'm high at home alone) and less intellectually sharp (my memory is not amazing), plus it's not good for the lungs. I'm aware edibles bypass the last part, but they get me high for way longer so I think just switching to edibles is counterproductive. GOAL: take an extended break from the weed, and resume smoking socially or a couple times a week instead of every night.
NICOTINE: I replaced cigarettes with vaping a few years ago, but the convenience of vaping means I have ended up way more addicted to the vape than I ever was to cigarettes. I mostly smoked cigs while drinking and could easily go without, while now I vape all damn day. I've tried going without and only made it one or two days. Like I mentioned, I struggle with anxiety and I don't deal the best with stress, so the moment I had a stressful moment at work I caved.
I do wonder if I quit vaping altogether I would be less anxious, since nicotine is a stimulant. GOAL: completely quit, or just keep it to a couple puffs when drinking (I don't drink much anymore, so I don't think that would be a big issue).
So, I know I need to just...you know, do it. But I feel overwhelmed at the thought of even where to start, and I keep waiting until the right time, but there never IS a right time. Do I start with the weed or the nicotine, do I try both at once, or what? Is replacing weed with CBD products "cheating" or a good way to quit? Help me come up with a plan.
I'm a woman in my mid-30s. I am actually in very good health by all metrics, live an otherwise pretty healthy lifestyle (moderate activity, lots of vegetables), have a good career etc. but I don't think vaping all day and smoking weed every night can be good for me in the long run. I also worry that my consumption of both is impacting my depression and anxiety, the managing of which is a lifelong battle for me. I take SSRIs which take the edge off but wonder if I would feel better without all the weed.
CANNABIS: I've been smoking weed casually since my teens. I was a party girl through my late 20s and as I gave up that lifestyle I replaced it with smoking weed at home. For the past several years I smoke every night after work and throughout the day on weekends. I keep making plans to quit and putting it off. Weed helps me tune out my job stress, relax, and enjoy creative pursuits and I worry that I won't be able to cope with stress without it.
But, I also worry that it is making me more depressed and anxious (I do get paranoid sometimes when I'm high at home alone) and less intellectually sharp (my memory is not amazing), plus it's not good for the lungs. I'm aware edibles bypass the last part, but they get me high for way longer so I think just switching to edibles is counterproductive. GOAL: take an extended break from the weed, and resume smoking socially or a couple times a week instead of every night.
NICOTINE: I replaced cigarettes with vaping a few years ago, but the convenience of vaping means I have ended up way more addicted to the vape than I ever was to cigarettes. I mostly smoked cigs while drinking and could easily go without, while now I vape all damn day. I've tried going without and only made it one or two days. Like I mentioned, I struggle with anxiety and I don't deal the best with stress, so the moment I had a stressful moment at work I caved.
I do wonder if I quit vaping altogether I would be less anxious, since nicotine is a stimulant. GOAL: completely quit, or just keep it to a couple puffs when drinking (I don't drink much anymore, so I don't think that would be a big issue).
So, I know I need to just...you know, do it. But I feel overwhelmed at the thought of even where to start, and I keep waiting until the right time, but there never IS a right time. Do I start with the weed or the nicotine, do I try both at once, or what? Is replacing weed with CBD products "cheating" or a good way to quit? Help me come up with a plan.
For the nicotine: I smoked cigarettes for about 20 years with several failed quitting attempts. Chantix made it relatively easy for me to quit seven years ago, and I never even worried about falling back into it. It takes out the reward part of satisfying the craving, and what's left just isn't fun. You may try switching back to smoking only first. The only side effect for me was some vivid dreams.
Obviously it helps if you can avoid or minimize the culture where lots of people are doing these things around you. Good luck!
posted by SaltySalticid at 4:10 AM on November 6, 2023 [3 favorites]
Obviously it helps if you can avoid or minimize the culture where lots of people are doing these things around you. Good luck!
posted by SaltySalticid at 4:10 AM on November 6, 2023 [3 favorites]
Do you have access to healthcare? Your doctor can help you with this much better than internet strangers can -- including by prescribing medical aids for the nicotine withdrawal and providing accountability.
posted by heatherlogan at 4:52 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by heatherlogan at 4:52 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
Craving to Quit is worth exploring. It's an app that's based in CBT (etc.) research. It's focused on tobacco/nicotine but is relevant for weed, too.
Do you have access to healthcare? Your doctor can help you with this much better than internet strangers can -- including by prescribing medical aids for the nicotine withdrawal and providing accountability.
If only. Speaking from within the public health infrastructure, this is one situation in which group support can be incredibly powerful. Reddit's stop smoking subreddit, in particular, was essential to my quit process. I'm still active there in gratitude.
posted by late afternoon dreaming hotel at 5:23 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
Do you have access to healthcare? Your doctor can help you with this much better than internet strangers can -- including by prescribing medical aids for the nicotine withdrawal and providing accountability.
If only. Speaking from within the public health infrastructure, this is one situation in which group support can be incredibly powerful. Reddit's stop smoking subreddit, in particular, was essential to my quit process. I'm still active there in gratitude.
posted by late afternoon dreaming hotel at 5:23 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
I hear you on the vaping part. Same thing happened to me. I actually went back to smoking cigarettes to cut back after the vape got me up to the equivalent of pack a day, after never smoking more than 2 cogs a day. After I went back to regular cigarettes, I started using nicotine gum which took a couple months to really switch to, and then I used it for about a year before gradually losing interest and now I don't use it at all.
posted by ananci at 5:26 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by ananci at 5:26 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
Does the person prescribing the SSRIs know about the cannabis issue? There may be an upgrade there that could help with overall mood/confidence/etc. It might be possible that a fresh look could reveal some adhd etc that is at the root of the stress. Not to delay any of the other goals, but it might fold in to a feeling of working toward something rather than “why cant I quit self medicating and deal” vibe. Good luck, blue/green colleague!
posted by drowsy at 5:27 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by drowsy at 5:27 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
I would maybe approach this by tackling the anxiety that is at the root of it. Specifically approaching your fear of giving up weed/nicotine from an anxiety perspective. "What am I scared will happen if I don't get high? I will be overwhelmed with anxiety. What can I do to stop that anxiety feeling in my mind and in my body? Ok let's practice doing that ahead of time so I can do it easily in the moment."
If you don't have access to a therapist, these are the two books I'd recommend: Mind Over Mood and The Relaxation And Stress Reduction Workbook. (You can find pdfs online if you search a bit)
posted by EllaEm at 6:04 AM on November 6, 2023
If you don't have access to a therapist, these are the two books I'd recommend: Mind Over Mood and The Relaxation And Stress Reduction Workbook. (You can find pdfs online if you search a bit)
posted by EllaEm at 6:04 AM on November 6, 2023
I agree that you should take these one at a time, and quitting weed first probably makes the most sense. If you decide to go back to occasionally smoking weed, I think it makes the most sense to say "social smoking" only. It's just an easier rule to follow.
For the cigarettes, quitting smoking is hard. I'm an alcoholic (sober 12.5 years now), and quitting smoking was much harder in a lot of ways than quitting alcohol. For me, what ultimately worked was wellbutrin + nicotine gum. But I admit, 11 years later, I'm still addicted to nicotine gum. While that's better than smoking, if I could do it all over again, I would try to quit without using nicotine gum, if possible. Talk to your doctor about Wellbutrin or Chantix to see if either of those are good options for you. (Wellbutrin is used for depression, but I found it made me anxious at higher doses. YMMV)
Oh, also, motivational interviewing was a therapeutic technique that I found really helped get me in the right headspace to quit smoking cigarettes. You also might want to check out Alan Carr's easy way to quit smoking book.
And don't get discouraged if you have some relapses in your attempts to quit. With both alcohol and cigarettes, I had multiple relapses before finally getting to the point where i was able to give them up for good.
Good luck! You can do this.
posted by litera scripta manet at 6:24 AM on November 6, 2023 [4 favorites]
For the cigarettes, quitting smoking is hard. I'm an alcoholic (sober 12.5 years now), and quitting smoking was much harder in a lot of ways than quitting alcohol. For me, what ultimately worked was wellbutrin + nicotine gum. But I admit, 11 years later, I'm still addicted to nicotine gum. While that's better than smoking, if I could do it all over again, I would try to quit without using nicotine gum, if possible. Talk to your doctor about Wellbutrin or Chantix to see if either of those are good options for you. (Wellbutrin is used for depression, but I found it made me anxious at higher doses. YMMV)
Oh, also, motivational interviewing was a therapeutic technique that I found really helped get me in the right headspace to quit smoking cigarettes. You also might want to check out Alan Carr's easy way to quit smoking book.
And don't get discouraged if you have some relapses in your attempts to quit. With both alcohol and cigarettes, I had multiple relapses before finally getting to the point where i was able to give them up for good.
Good luck! You can do this.
posted by litera scripta manet at 6:24 AM on November 6, 2023 [4 favorites]
Also came to recommend the Alan Carr book. Been a long time since I used it so I've no idea how it aged, but it was really good.
posted by penguin pie at 6:30 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by penguin pie at 6:30 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
I would start with the nicotine because there are a lot of drugs and products designed to help you with it, because it is a physical addiction in a different way than the weed, and because it doesn't seem to be providing clear benefits (you list a lot of reasons why you use weed, but nicotine seems like more of a habit than something that benefits you in any way).
After that, see how you feel, and come up with a plan for the weed based on how you're doing.
posted by metasarah at 6:43 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
After that, see how you feel, and come up with a plan for the weed based on how you're doing.
posted by metasarah at 6:43 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
The reddit community r/leaves - and more so the twice daily discord meetings - were invaluable to me when I was quitting weed. I’d highly recommend getting support from peers with this if possible.
posted by chives at 7:51 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
posted by chives at 7:51 AM on November 6, 2023 [2 favorites]
I was a solid pack a day smoker and quit, entirely, fourteen years ago with the help of Wellbutrin and the Alan Carr book.
As to the weed, echoing whoever above said to drop it out first and see if it has any affect on your anxiety. I went on a long weed hiatus a while back because I realized it was doing the exact wrong thing to my anxiety level and I didn't even know until I quit.
posted by thivaia at 8:00 AM on November 6, 2023
As to the weed, echoing whoever above said to drop it out first and see if it has any affect on your anxiety. I went on a long weed hiatus a while back because I realized it was doing the exact wrong thing to my anxiety level and I didn't even know until I quit.
posted by thivaia at 8:00 AM on November 6, 2023
Check out this book: Quitting Weed. It'll help you contextualize how you're feeling (especially how cannabis might be contributing to your anxiety and depression).
posted by fishhouses at 8:21 AM on November 6, 2023
posted by fishhouses at 8:21 AM on November 6, 2023
Wow good for you! Huge ups for taking on this project. You have good insight into both your strengths and the potential harms of these behaviors on you. You're brave and this internet stranger believes you can do this!
There is a body of research around quitting smoking, much of which applies to vaping nicotine, and some of which applies to any substance use. Your local health department may have resources like California's quit coaches. Even without a coach, including some evidence-supported elements like:
- Pick a quit date
- Identify triggers
- Make a plan
- get medical support (Chiantix as mentioned above, Wellbutrin helpful for some, nicotine replacement for some).
can be a big boost. It may be useful to quit both at once, or you may be a person who decides to taper off. Even if you decide to taper rather than quit, you can still set target dates for different behavior changes.
I recommend picking up other activities at your peak use-times. So if getting home from work is your trigger to get high, pick some replacement behaviors for that specific time, ideally behaviors that have some accountability built in (walk with a neighbor at 6:00 PM each night, quit-support group at 7 PM, practice a new musical instrument on the front porch (somewhere away from where you normally smoke).
New hobbies may also connect you with new friends who don't smoke weed or vape. Take a dance class or start volunteering at the animal shelter on weekends. Stuff like that.
I also recommend financial rewards: Set aside any money you would be spending on nicotine and canabis in a jar or some kind of visible bank account or set calendar alerts to let you know how much your saving or something, and then either save it up for a big reward or buy yourself small rewards with the money if regular positive feedback seems more motivating.
Great work so far reaching out for help. You've got this!
posted by latkes at 8:39 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
There is a body of research around quitting smoking, much of which applies to vaping nicotine, and some of which applies to any substance use. Your local health department may have resources like California's quit coaches. Even without a coach, including some evidence-supported elements like:
- Pick a quit date
- Identify triggers
- Make a plan
- get medical support (Chiantix as mentioned above, Wellbutrin helpful for some, nicotine replacement for some).
can be a big boost. It may be useful to quit both at once, or you may be a person who decides to taper off. Even if you decide to taper rather than quit, you can still set target dates for different behavior changes.
I recommend picking up other activities at your peak use-times. So if getting home from work is your trigger to get high, pick some replacement behaviors for that specific time, ideally behaviors that have some accountability built in (walk with a neighbor at 6:00 PM each night, quit-support group at 7 PM, practice a new musical instrument on the front porch (somewhere away from where you normally smoke).
New hobbies may also connect you with new friends who don't smoke weed or vape. Take a dance class or start volunteering at the animal shelter on weekends. Stuff like that.
I also recommend financial rewards: Set aside any money you would be spending on nicotine and canabis in a jar or some kind of visible bank account or set calendar alerts to let you know how much your saving or something, and then either save it up for a big reward or buy yourself small rewards with the money if regular positive feedback seems more motivating.
Great work so far reaching out for help. You've got this!
posted by latkes at 8:39 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
I hear you on being more addicted to vaping than cigarettes. It’s just too easy!
I’ve had great luck with using the patch to quit before, and actually am back on day one of patches today. The various pills have some mental health side effects that concern me, whereas the patch just makes me not want to hit the vape. There are 3 levels, so you can taper yourself off. A two week supply of the Target brand patches is about $25, but you can probably get them free from your doctor. Having some sugar free candy on hand for the oral fixation is nice too. The only thing negative about the patch is that I had gruesome dreams if I didn’t take it off before bed.
I think this time it will stick because a) I am SO over vaping, and b) cigarettes taste so gross to me now that I can’t imagine bumming one in a moment of weakness. Having to go and buy a vape is enough of a barrier. Hopefully.
Good luck! I’m rooting for ya!
posted by sacrifix at 8:39 AM on November 6, 2023
I’ve had great luck with using the patch to quit before, and actually am back on day one of patches today. The various pills have some mental health side effects that concern me, whereas the patch just makes me not want to hit the vape. There are 3 levels, so you can taper yourself off. A two week supply of the Target brand patches is about $25, but you can probably get them free from your doctor. Having some sugar free candy on hand for the oral fixation is nice too. The only thing negative about the patch is that I had gruesome dreams if I didn’t take it off before bed.
I think this time it will stick because a) I am SO over vaping, and b) cigarettes taste so gross to me now that I can’t imagine bumming one in a moment of weakness. Having to go and buy a vape is enough of a barrier. Hopefully.
Good luck! I’m rooting for ya!
posted by sacrifix at 8:39 AM on November 6, 2023
Here's one other way to come at this; I want to turn your question around and ask YOU some questions:
1) What is motiving you to quit?
2) How do you want your life to look in 6 months? How will quitting these behaviors help with that goal?
3) What will help you achieve your goals? What support people do you have to call on? What resources do you have access to that might help?
4) What are some things you can try if you feel a craving?
YOU know better than all of our internet wisdom the answer to these questions!
posted by latkes at 8:44 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
1) What is motiving you to quit?
2) How do you want your life to look in 6 months? How will quitting these behaviors help with that goal?
3) What will help you achieve your goals? What support people do you have to call on? What resources do you have access to that might help?
4) What are some things you can try if you feel a craving?
YOU know better than all of our internet wisdom the answer to these questions!
posted by latkes at 8:44 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
I can't speak to the weed, but nicotine lozenges helped me to quit vaping. I was on the lozenges for over a year (longer than I really wanted). I used the really small mini-lozenges that would easily fit between my cheek and gums, where it would take a couple of hours for them to dissolve. I was using maybe three or four of the 2mg lozenges each day. The 4mg ones were too strong and made me feel ill. I eventually quit the lozenges cold turkey, rather than tapering (which was my original plan). I felt cravings for a few days, maybe longer, but then it passed. As British writer Oliver Burkeman puts it, "The capacity to tolerate minor discomfort is a superpower."
posted by akk2014 at 11:28 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
posted by akk2014 at 11:28 AM on November 6, 2023 [1 favorite]
Get it! Congratulations on moving toward the life you want.
If you’re in the US, there are a lot of public resources dedicated to smoking cessation:
From the CDC:
“For support in quitting, including free quit coaching, a free quit plan, free educational materials, and referrals to local resources, call 1-800-QUIT-NOW (1-800-784-8669).”
Link to the CDC’s Quit Smoking page, which also has links to state-level resources
The National Cancer Institute’s smokefree.gov
FDA Office of Women’s Health: Medicines to help you quit
posted by rrrrrrrrrt at 1:24 PM on November 6, 2023
If you’re in the US, there are a lot of public resources dedicated to smoking cessation:
From the CDC:
“For support in quitting, including free quit coaching, a free quit plan, free educational materials, and referrals to local resources, call 1-800-QUIT-NOW (1-800-784-8669).”
Link to the CDC’s Quit Smoking page, which also has links to state-level resources
The National Cancer Institute’s smokefree.gov
FDA Office of Women’s Health: Medicines to help you quit
posted by rrrrrrrrrt at 1:24 PM on November 6, 2023
one way to get off nicotine: get a vuze, step yourself down on the nicotine percentage until you're at the lowest ones (1.8%?). they won't be nearly as satisfactory and that's what you want. vape as much as you want but keep stepping down your percentage. take a few weeks at each step if you gotta. the bad feelings of vaping kinda start to outweigh the good feels. when you get to the lowest % pods, get a 7 or 14mg patch in there. I found 14mg to be a little intense after a long period of taper down (and I take them off to sleep, too) but ymmv. when you go from 14mg > 7mg, get the gum (nicorette tastes like ass now, there's another brand on amazon that isn't full of fake sugar) or lozenges in there. take your time. I am still on small patch because it turns out that full nicotine withdrawal will give you hella brainfog, but i have not vaped in months.
I have also removed myself from drinking/smoking environments, because I absolutely would smoke a cigarette if offered.
good luck!
posted by sibboleth at 8:34 PM on November 6, 2023
I have also removed myself from drinking/smoking environments, because I absolutely would smoke a cigarette if offered.
good luck!
posted by sibboleth at 8:34 PM on November 6, 2023
If you are interested in learning in a group setting, you might get some value from SMART Recovery meetings. It is practical and evidenced-based.
posted by Mouse Army at 4:19 AM on November 8, 2023
posted by Mouse Army at 4:19 AM on November 8, 2023
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It's easier to quit or take a break from than nicotine, and it'll be useful for you to find out if it's been negatively affecting your anxiety or depression, which it's more likely to be doing than the nicotine.
You might find it had no impact and go back to socially smoking, which is a great outcome!
But I've had a few friends who, only when they stopped, realised it had been exacerbating their anxiety. If it makes you paranoid sometimes, that is the flag to try none for awhile - either your anxiety is reduced, which is a good outcome! Or you realise after a few week break that it doesn't make a difference and can go back to smoking with less worries/guilt/reservations - also a good outcome.
The sooner you trial going off weed, the sooner you will find out which category you fall in.
Don't reduce, just completely go off it to see if it's been affecting your anxiety etc.
Just get it over with - no weed for a month. Do it now and you can start again over the holiday period if you are fine!
Spend a bit of cash on alternative relaxation activities, like book a massage now and in 2 weeks to see if that helps a bit. Swimming can be good. Treat yo self while you are changing your routine
posted by Elysum at 11:14 PM on November 5, 2023 [1 favorite]