Resources for coping with ongoing trauma?
January 11, 2023 12:28 AM Subscribe
Please share resources on coping with ongoing trauma.
So much advice around healing from trauma assumes or requires that the events and initial response or processing are in the past.
How do you manage ongoing trauma, including everyday, normalised, 'little-t' trauma, such as microaggressions or systemic discrimination?
Looking for resources - articles, books, websites, etc. - that are about general coping with ongoing trauma or specific to contexts of sexism and/or ableism.
So much advice around healing from trauma assumes or requires that the events and initial response or processing are in the past.
How do you manage ongoing trauma, including everyday, normalised, 'little-t' trauma, such as microaggressions or systemic discrimination?
Looking for resources - articles, books, websites, etc. - that are about general coping with ongoing trauma or specific to contexts of sexism and/or ableism.
You might try the tapping/eft videos on YouTube with Brad Yates… I just did his dealing with a scary person (or something like that) video yesterday and it was super helpful!
posted by catspajammies at 4:39 AM on January 11, 2023 [3 favorites]
posted by catspajammies at 4:39 AM on January 11, 2023 [3 favorites]
The Nagoski sisters' book Burnout sounds pretty on-point - it acknowledges ongoing and systemic stressors (specifically, patriarchy). It also talks about processing stress as a separate thing from dealing with the cause of the stress.
posted by mersen at 6:23 AM on January 11, 2023 [5 favorites]
posted by mersen at 6:23 AM on January 11, 2023 [5 favorites]
+1 for Burnout - helpful perspective that "facing your fears" or "vanquishing or eliminating stressors" is often not possible (bad news) but also not necessary for processing and removing stress (good news).
I would recommend Trauma Stewardship - though geared towards secondary trauma, I found it helpful for the problem of caring for yourself and others brings inevitable trauma and suffering for experiencing harm - to yourself and others.
posted by sol at 8:20 AM on January 11, 2023 [2 favorites]
I would recommend Trauma Stewardship - though geared towards secondary trauma, I found it helpful for the problem of caring for yourself and others brings inevitable trauma and suffering for experiencing harm - to yourself and others.
posted by sol at 8:20 AM on January 11, 2023 [2 favorites]
For interpersonal trauma, try to get away from the people. When a house is on fire, the goal would be to exit the house before trying to bandage the burns. Try to exit the situations. Break up from a toxic friend or partner, look for a new job, get out of a living situation, etc. There is almost always a way to leave.
Recovering from ongoing systemic discrimination is really hard, I struggle with it too. Follow people on social media who talk about it - in particular there are a lot of Black women activists and disabled activists who have good strategies. Ericka Hart, Imani Barbarin, Roxane Gay, Ijeoma Oluo, and Nina Tame are good to follow for starters.
It can also help to find people in your same situation who will listen and share stories. Reddit or other online groups can be a good place to find support. It's good to know you're not the only one, and hearing others' stories can help you spot systemic patterns of abuse, which can help depersonalize the experience so you can realize the other person or system is the source of the problem, not you - also help you look ahead so every single instance isn't such a shock. Good luck.
posted by nouvelle-personne at 9:29 AM on January 11, 2023 [1 favorite]
Recovering from ongoing systemic discrimination is really hard, I struggle with it too. Follow people on social media who talk about it - in particular there are a lot of Black women activists and disabled activists who have good strategies. Ericka Hart, Imani Barbarin, Roxane Gay, Ijeoma Oluo, and Nina Tame are good to follow for starters.
It can also help to find people in your same situation who will listen and share stories. Reddit or other online groups can be a good place to find support. It's good to know you're not the only one, and hearing others' stories can help you spot systemic patterns of abuse, which can help depersonalize the experience so you can realize the other person or system is the source of the problem, not you - also help you look ahead so every single instance isn't such a shock. Good luck.
posted by nouvelle-personne at 9:29 AM on January 11, 2023 [1 favorite]
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posted by freethefeet at 2:04 AM on January 11, 2023 [3 favorites]