Please Help Me Read My Scared Cat's Body Language
January 7, 2020 11:34 AM
I adopted a 6-year-old torbie from a nearby shelter a week and a half ago. She had been in 2 different shelters for the last 7 months and was microchipped, so presumably had a home before that. She is very, very scared and has mostly stayed in hiding, which is not a huge surprise. But I'm confused by some of her body language, which concurrently seems comfortable and loving but also defensive and scared. Can you help me understand what she's conveying?
So the background is that she had been in shelters for several months, and her previous owners didn't respond when contacted via the microchip. I have no other pets and a small 1-bedroom apartment. She had a couple of hiding spots, and over that first week, she got comfortable enough to come out to eat, eventually playing with a toy and chasing her tail out in the open of the living room, with me a few feet away on the couch. If I'd move at all, she'd run. But when she was in her hiding place, she'd let me get down on her level, reach underneath, and pet and scratch her.
Then came my first attempt to get her into a carrier for a vet visit. You can guess how that went.
With the vet appointment canceled for a couple weeks (I failed at getting her in the carrier and worried I was traumatizing her), I'm now trying to regain her trust and comfort. I have a pheromone diffuser plugged in right next to the kitchen table, her favorite hiding spot. She comes out to eat and use the litter box (both nearby) but is very wary of me when she does, slinking around and stopping to eye me for seconds at a time. However, she still lets me pet her on her chair spot under the table, but that's where I'm confused about her signals.
She lets me pet her top to bottom, no apparent sensitivity to certain spots, not even her tail. She purrs the whole time, though I've read that cats sometimes purr to comfort themselves when they're upset. She will sometimes scoot to the farthest edge of the chair away from me, but she doesn't get down and run away. She will put her butt in the air and her front half down on the chair, lay her head on its side looking away from me. Or she'll let me pet her and then will kind of fall over against my hand, which seems to me like she's enjoying it but also maybe looks like the Flinch action from this site? She will sit on that chair while I pet her, purring away and head butting my hand a bit, but she will also here and there keep her tail tucked tightly against her side with the end hooked.
I can't decide whether she's legitimately enjoying being pet and scratched (just as long as she's in her safe place) or whether she's just tolerating it, showing me submissive/fearful behaviors, and purring only to comfort herself. I don't want to overwhelm her if she doesn't like it, but I don't want to ignore her if she does. Help?
So the background is that she had been in shelters for several months, and her previous owners didn't respond when contacted via the microchip. I have no other pets and a small 1-bedroom apartment. She had a couple of hiding spots, and over that first week, she got comfortable enough to come out to eat, eventually playing with a toy and chasing her tail out in the open of the living room, with me a few feet away on the couch. If I'd move at all, she'd run. But when she was in her hiding place, she'd let me get down on her level, reach underneath, and pet and scratch her.
Then came my first attempt to get her into a carrier for a vet visit. You can guess how that went.
With the vet appointment canceled for a couple weeks (I failed at getting her in the carrier and worried I was traumatizing her), I'm now trying to regain her trust and comfort. I have a pheromone diffuser plugged in right next to the kitchen table, her favorite hiding spot. She comes out to eat and use the litter box (both nearby) but is very wary of me when she does, slinking around and stopping to eye me for seconds at a time. However, she still lets me pet her on her chair spot under the table, but that's where I'm confused about her signals.
She lets me pet her top to bottom, no apparent sensitivity to certain spots, not even her tail. She purrs the whole time, though I've read that cats sometimes purr to comfort themselves when they're upset. She will sometimes scoot to the farthest edge of the chair away from me, but she doesn't get down and run away. She will put her butt in the air and her front half down on the chair, lay her head on its side looking away from me. Or she'll let me pet her and then will kind of fall over against my hand, which seems to me like she's enjoying it but also maybe looks like the Flinch action from this site? She will sit on that chair while I pet her, purring away and head butting my hand a bit, but she will also here and there keep her tail tucked tightly against her side with the end hooked.
I can't decide whether she's legitimately enjoying being pet and scratched (just as long as she's in her safe place) or whether she's just tolerating it, showing me submissive/fearful behaviors, and purring only to comfort herself. I don't want to overwhelm her if she doesn't like it, but I don't want to ignore her if she does. Help?
This sounds a whole lot like how my cat acts, especially the "leaning against my hand" thing. Nothing in your description is worrying. Leaning into being petted is, the way I interpret it, a request for more petting and harder (and my cat is surprisingly tolerant of being treated that way, so yours might be too). If she were doing that "flinch" pose, she wouldn't be doing it while you were petting her.
Being scared of the carrier for vet visits is, AFAIK, normal cat behavior. This is a place you'll have to use some force, and it's not going to be pleasant for either of you, but she will need a vet trip at some point and it's the only way to do it. Expect mournful meowing all the way to the vet. But it'll all be fine once you get home, and some treats when you get back might help her recover her mood (depending on what your cat likes).
posted by wanderingmind at 11:54 AM on January 7, 2020
Being scared of the carrier for vet visits is, AFAIK, normal cat behavior. This is a place you'll have to use some force, and it's not going to be pleasant for either of you, but she will need a vet trip at some point and it's the only way to do it. Expect mournful meowing all the way to the vet. But it'll all be fine once you get home, and some treats when you get back might help her recover her mood (depending on what your cat likes).
posted by wanderingmind at 11:54 AM on January 7, 2020
My skittish tortie spent her whole life being petted like this. She was pretty friendly but ended up being happiest near us, not sitting on us. Keep up with it and I’m sure she’ll come out of her shell.
For the carrier - my trick was to get the carrier out a few days in advance and put it in a small room. On the day of, I would grab the cat and take her to the carrier (small room means you can shut the door and contain the cat).
posted by some chick at 11:56 AM on January 7, 2020
For the carrier - my trick was to get the carrier out a few days in advance and put it in a small room. On the day of, I would grab the cat and take her to the carrier (small room means you can shut the door and contain the cat).
posted by some chick at 11:56 AM on January 7, 2020
Yeah no. I mean, the purring we could argue about, I guess, but the headbutting and falling over and the stretching and looking away from you all speak of a cat who trusts you and demands your petting - at times.
That is, I see nothing inconsistent about a cat who is a huge budding snugglebutt, but is still sometimes easily spooked by her new human.
It's been a week and a half! Give her more time! (And petting! And treats! MOARRRR treats.)
posted by Omnomnom at 11:58 AM on January 7, 2020
That is, I see nothing inconsistent about a cat who is a huge budding snugglebutt, but is still sometimes easily spooked by her new human.
It's been a week and a half! Give her more time! (And petting! And treats! MOARRRR treats.)
posted by Omnomnom at 11:58 AM on January 7, 2020
I agree the description sounds like enjoyment. I'm not an animal behavior specialist or anything, but I've only ever seen cats do the "purring to comfort themselves" thing when they're ill or hurt, not when they're just scared or annoyed. If she's truly getting irritated, her tail will probably start swishing forcefully. If you persist beyond that, you'll likely get smacked with a paw and/or hissed/yelled at and then she'll run off.
I give my cats gabapentin before we go to the vet. It makes the packaging somewhat easier and also smooths out the car ride and office visit.
posted by slenderloris at 12:09 PM on January 7, 2020
I give my cats gabapentin before we go to the vet. It makes the packaging somewhat easier and also smooths out the car ride and office visit.
posted by slenderloris at 12:09 PM on January 7, 2020
After nearly 2 years with my cat, I learned that it's easier to set the hard-sided cat carrier upright with the door open. I started to leave little treats in and around the carrier so he got familiar with it. I'll pick up Oliver with his feet dangling down free and dip him in feet first. Once I close the top, I slowly tip the carrier so that it's horizontal. Easier to do it this way.
posted by HeyAllie at 12:12 PM on January 7, 2020
posted by HeyAllie at 12:12 PM on January 7, 2020
Cats can be context dependent. Our closest to still feral cat will let me pet him (even out in the open). He'll stand on our laps. I can sit on the ground, grab him by the sides, walk him to my lap and clip his nails. But if I pick him up, the second his feet are off the ground he immediately switches to flight mode. He won't bite, but will happily claw me to pieces squirming to escape until the second his feet hit the ground. And then he'll look at me with anger and suspicion for a bit, but he won't go into hiding.
Similarly, one of my previous cats was happy to be held, picked up, pet and was our most affectionate cat ever. Heck, I could even pill him without needing the cat burrito technique. However the first 4+ years of owning him I had a 100% chance of getting fear-peed-on when putting him in a cat carrier. That only improved to about 50% as time went on for the next few years before the poor furball died too young. Bringing him home and releasing him would result in him hiding and wanting nothing to do with us for about an hour. After that hour-ish he was back to his normal love-y self.
Which is to say that if the cat is sitting on a table chair and is seemingly affectionate with the head butting while you pet her I'd take that at face value. And you might just have to accept that getting her in a cat carrier will forever be a horrible chore done with good quality leather gloves/towels (which of course the cat will learn what the presense of gloves/towels means).
I think a good test of the trust would be how long your cat hates you after getting her into the cat carrier and letting her out. If she's back to her current normal in less than a day than the carrier is probably not as stressful as her actions at the time seem to indicate. What was the recovery timeline like the last time you tried getting her in a carrier?
Also I'll note that much like pilling a cat, you should take Yoda's advice with getting a cat in a cat carrier. Do or do not. If you do not, you encourage your cat to fight harder as she's learned she can win. If you start to try to get her in the carrier, have any supplies for escalation ready (gloves/towel are my goto for a fighter - maybe check youtube for techniques). Do not let her think she can fight and win. Yeah, it sucks to be confrontational with a cat. The sounds they make and visible distress can be heart breaking. But you must win. Every stinking time.
Initially she will fight harder as you get her in the carrier; but this is the Extinction Burst. Eventually she'll fight less. But only if you *always* win. Otherwise it's like a slot machine - fight enough and she might get a payout.
Alternate option if you can reliably get the cat into a relatively contained room - book a home visit with your vet. It will be more costly, but if the carrier is what is freaking out the cat, a stranger coming into the house to poke and prod might be better. If your vet won't do a home visit, call around - you'll find one.
posted by nobeagle at 12:35 PM on January 7, 2020
Similarly, one of my previous cats was happy to be held, picked up, pet and was our most affectionate cat ever. Heck, I could even pill him without needing the cat burrito technique. However the first 4+ years of owning him I had a 100% chance of getting fear-peed-on when putting him in a cat carrier. That only improved to about 50% as time went on for the next few years before the poor furball died too young. Bringing him home and releasing him would result in him hiding and wanting nothing to do with us for about an hour. After that hour-ish he was back to his normal love-y self.
Which is to say that if the cat is sitting on a table chair and is seemingly affectionate with the head butting while you pet her I'd take that at face value. And you might just have to accept that getting her in a cat carrier will forever be a horrible chore done with good quality leather gloves/towels (which of course the cat will learn what the presense of gloves/towels means).
I think a good test of the trust would be how long your cat hates you after getting her into the cat carrier and letting her out. If she's back to her current normal in less than a day than the carrier is probably not as stressful as her actions at the time seem to indicate. What was the recovery timeline like the last time you tried getting her in a carrier?
Also I'll note that much like pilling a cat, you should take Yoda's advice with getting a cat in a cat carrier. Do or do not. If you do not, you encourage your cat to fight harder as she's learned she can win. If you start to try to get her in the carrier, have any supplies for escalation ready (gloves/towel are my goto for a fighter - maybe check youtube for techniques). Do not let her think she can fight and win. Yeah, it sucks to be confrontational with a cat. The sounds they make and visible distress can be heart breaking. But you must win. Every stinking time.
Initially she will fight harder as you get her in the carrier; but this is the Extinction Burst. Eventually she'll fight less. But only if you *always* win. Otherwise it's like a slot machine - fight enough and she might get a payout.
Alternate option if you can reliably get the cat into a relatively contained room - book a home visit with your vet. It will be more costly, but if the carrier is what is freaking out the cat, a stranger coming into the house to poke and prod might be better. If your vet won't do a home visit, call around - you'll find one.
posted by nobeagle at 12:35 PM on January 7, 2020
I would feed her treats by hand, maybe churu -- something incredibly delicious -- and only from your hand. That is likely to increase association between you and goodness in her mind.
I took a cat to be spayed in 1996. She did not want to go in her carrier. I got her in after quite a struggle, and then she spent the entire time between my home and the vet throwing herself at the door of the carrier. I got to the vet and the receptionist said, "You're bleeding." Sure enough, a deep scratch on my wrist was dripping blood.
I still have the scar. She was never a lap cat, but she was sweet and not scared of me after the first few weeks of us living together.
posted by janey47 at 1:00 PM on January 7, 2020
I took a cat to be spayed in 1996. She did not want to go in her carrier. I got her in after quite a struggle, and then she spent the entire time between my home and the vet throwing herself at the door of the carrier. I got to the vet and the receptionist said, "You're bleeding." Sure enough, a deep scratch on my wrist was dripping blood.
I still have the scar. She was never a lap cat, but she was sweet and not scared of me after the first few weeks of us living together.
posted by janey47 at 1:00 PM on January 7, 2020
It sounds to me like she’s coming around, but be prepared for it to take many more months for her to be truly comfortable.
I would skip the vet for now unless you have specific concerns. Or better yet, see if there’s a mobile vet who will come to your house. I used one for the first time this year to do the yearly exams and vaccinations on my three cats - it was cheaper and so, so much less traumatic than driving them across town.
posted by something something at 1:33 PM on January 7, 2020
I would skip the vet for now unless you have specific concerns. Or better yet, see if there’s a mobile vet who will come to your house. I used one for the first time this year to do the yearly exams and vaccinations on my three cats - it was cheaper and so, so much less traumatic than driving them across town.
posted by something something at 1:33 PM on January 7, 2020
At least two times she’s been in a carrier, she’s been left behind and abandoned. I wouldn’t get in it either.
I have a soft backpack/rolling luggage cat carrier and leave it open for my cats to sleep in if they like. They still hate going to the vet - or anywhere - but the carrier isn’t a stressor.
Fonzie went to the vet last week, then two days later was sleeping in the carrier. It has a big open flap, and I put some soft things and a tshirt that smells like me.
If cat didn’t want you petting and scratching - you’d know. I’m so many different ways.
Maybe try a home-service vet this first time if it’s available to you?
posted by crankyrogalsky at 1:40 PM on January 7, 2020
I have a soft backpack/rolling luggage cat carrier and leave it open for my cats to sleep in if they like. They still hate going to the vet - or anywhere - but the carrier isn’t a stressor.
Fonzie went to the vet last week, then two days later was sleeping in the carrier. It has a big open flap, and I put some soft things and a tshirt that smells like me.
If cat didn’t want you petting and scratching - you’d know. I’m so many different ways.
Maybe try a home-service vet this first time if it’s available to you?
posted by crankyrogalsky at 1:40 PM on January 7, 2020
Nthing mobile vet, if you can manage it. Otherwise, my tactic is to leave the carrier out in the house, with the door open, for as long as possible before the appointment -- like, a week or two, ifyou can deal with it. Let it become another trusted item in the house, put a blanket in there, catnip, etc.
posted by BlahLaLa at 1:46 PM on January 7, 2020
posted by BlahLaLa at 1:46 PM on January 7, 2020
I leave the carrier out and open so it becomes part of the furniture and less scary. They all still hate it when the door is closed and they are captured at that point.
It sounds like your kitty is already getting aclimated to your home and you; so, good job!
posted by mightshould at 1:51 PM on January 7, 2020
It sounds like your kitty is already getting aclimated to your home and you; so, good job!
posted by mightshould at 1:51 PM on January 7, 2020
We got a much bigger carrier than was necessary for our, ah, Very Special Cat. It lives behind the couch, open, permanently, and the only time Very Special Cat gets treats is when they’re thrown deep into the carrier and he has to go in to retrieve them. He dives in head first without a second thought and we never have to fight him to get him into the carrier when it’s necessary.
posted by jesourie at 2:32 PM on January 7, 2020
posted by jesourie at 2:32 PM on January 7, 2020
Seconding "leave carrier out so it's part of the house furniture." Put a comfy blanket/carpet piece/pillow in it, and add small treats sometimes, so she starts to think of it as a rewarding place to visit. If there's no urgency with a trip to the vet, once she's occasionally willing to enter the carrier on her own (and has done so several times), secure the door, bring it to another room, and open it up and let her out. Let her figure out that "travel in carrier" is not innately a traumatic event. (Article: Get Your Cat to Like His Carrier)
Nthing all the "headbutting, nudging hand is a good sign" comments. If a cat doesn't want to be touched, and has space to move away, they'll move away. They will not stay in a comfortable safe spot and put up with uncomfortable touches - unwanted touches override the security of the location. Coming back to a location where they've been touched, is a strong sign that they liked, or at least didn't mind, the petting.
Laying down nearby facing away from you is a sign of trust; it's more vulnerable than watching you. And cats don't seek out contact with people who scare them. "Move away but not far away" is not a sign of submission or fear - she's scared, she'll move away if she can. Moving to the other side of a chair could mean she's spent time with humans who were prone to sudden jarring movements and doesn't want to be in range of that.
Sounds like she likes the place and she likes you, but is very nervous that whatever bad things happened before are going to happen again. Off the top of my head, and with no serious animal training, it sounds like she may have been in a place with grabby small children - so sudden movements are scary, and she keeps her tail tucked in, but she likes normal petting and scritches just fine.
posted by ErisLordFreedom at 1:11 PM on January 8, 2020
Nthing all the "headbutting, nudging hand is a good sign" comments. If a cat doesn't want to be touched, and has space to move away, they'll move away. They will not stay in a comfortable safe spot and put up with uncomfortable touches - unwanted touches override the security of the location. Coming back to a location where they've been touched, is a strong sign that they liked, or at least didn't mind, the petting.
Laying down nearby facing away from you is a sign of trust; it's more vulnerable than watching you. And cats don't seek out contact with people who scare them. "Move away but not far away" is not a sign of submission or fear - she's scared, she'll move away if she can. Moving to the other side of a chair could mean she's spent time with humans who were prone to sudden jarring movements and doesn't want to be in range of that.
Sounds like she likes the place and she likes you, but is very nervous that whatever bad things happened before are going to happen again. Off the top of my head, and with no serious animal training, it sounds like she may have been in a place with grabby small children - so sudden movements are scary, and she keeps her tail tucked in, but she likes normal petting and scritches just fine.
posted by ErisLordFreedom at 1:11 PM on January 8, 2020
This thread is closed to new comments.
The flopping, headbutting, purring, butt in the air, all sound like good signs.
Going to the vet will always be traumatic. Individual cats may require tailored approaches to getting them into the carrier. Personally, I set the carrier up in another room quietly, with door open and facing upright. then I grab the cat and whisk to other room where i plop them thru the hole at the top and then close the gate behind them. You may need to experiment prior to the vet appointment to get your technique just right.
posted by some loser at 11:50 AM on January 7, 2020