Tell me your favorite no-effort potluck recipes!
December 17, 2019 8:11 AM   Subscribe

I unfortunately ran out of fucks before the office Christmas party. I need to take a potluck dish. I need it to impress. I need to put no effort and very little money into it. I cannot overstate how disinterested I am in this thing. It would gall me to put more than a half hour into this mandatory ticky-tacky bullcorn party. Help me come up with something delicious to dump into the office trough
posted by FakeFreyja to Food & Drink (40 answers total) 52 users marked this as a favorite
 
Creamy spinach artichoke dip from Storm Gourmet and a bag of tortilla chips or a box of ritz crackers. Entirely dump and stir of canned goods and a few spices. You can sub yogurt or sour cream for the table cream if you don't have or can't find it. And you can sub dried thyme and/or basil for the Herbes de Provence. I've brought it to potlucks with absolute success. If you wanted to make it seem fancier, you could sprinkle some cheese on top and throw it under a broiler for a few minutes, but it's not necessary.
posted by carrioncomfort at 8:18 AM on December 17, 2019 [7 favorites]


If you have a slow cooker or instant pot, rub a pork shoulder in taco seasoning and make carnitas.
Huge hit.
posted by exparrot at 8:19 AM on December 17, 2019 [4 favorites]


won't impress with looks, but oh man, very tasty.

block of cream cheese covered with either texas sweet hots or some kind of pepper jelly

corn dip - again not fancy but good. and easy
posted by domino at 8:29 AM on December 17, 2019 [5 favorites]


My wife (who does not cook) has made this slow cooker mac and cheese for several holiday office gatherings to much fanfare.

You plug the thing in, dump in the ingredients, stir a couple times and its done.
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 8:31 AM on December 17, 2019 [2 favorites]


Hummus with canned chickpeas takes like 5 minutes with a food processor and just grab a bag of pita bread, and you're done.
posted by toastyk at 8:32 AM on December 17, 2019 [2 favorites]


No-cook options:
-Cheese plate
-Fruit salad
-Toothpicks spearing little mozzarella balls and cherry tomatoes, or ham cubes and canteloupe, or whatever
posted by LobsterMitten at 8:33 AM on December 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


It's really easy to make guacamole, and people seem to really like it fresh. (Or at least, they tell me they do when I bring it in to work.) Just cut up some avocados, tomatoes, red onions, and bell peppers (eyeball it - usually about 4:1:1 ratio of avocados to tomatoes and onions), and then drizzle some lime juice and salt over it and stir. You can, of course, add other stuff to it: hot peppers, cilantro, corn. But the bare-bones stuff only takes like 15 minutes and isn't terribly expensive, depending on how cheap you can get your avocados.
posted by kevinbelt at 8:37 AM on December 17, 2019 [3 favorites]


Christmas Cracker Cookies

40 saltines (about one sleeve)
2 sticks butter
1 c brown sugar
Chocolate chips
Chopped nuts

Preheat oven to 400.

On a large rimmed baking tray/sheet pan, lay out a bunch of saltines (about 40).

In a small saucepan, melt 2 sticks of butter (or margarine, but butter is better) and a cup if brown sugar. Bring to a boil and boil 3 minutes.

Pour the sugar stuff evenly over the crackers.

Put in the oven for 4-5 minutes until bubbly all over. Watch and make sure they don’t burn.

Take out of oven and sprinkle chocolate chips all over the top. Let sit 5 minutes or so and then spread out the now-melted chips into a nice layer.

Sprinkle with chopped nuts (I like pecans) and then let sit to harden.

These are my go to need to bring something sweet to a thing, because they’re super-easy and everyone likes them. I had to bring something for my choir bake sale (which I was annoyed about) and the choir director even mentioned in rehearsal how good they were.
posted by leahwrenn at 8:58 AM on December 17, 2019 [11 favorites]


Go to your local cheap grocery store and pick up an inexpensive fruit tray, and a few sprigs of high end fruit such as cherries. Pick up a tub of fruit dip and a can of mandarin oranges. Take it all home, wash the extra fruit, open the mandarin oranges and pour some of the liquid into the fruit dip, which you then decant into a bowl of your own. Then arrange it more or less neatly on a tray of your own in the shape of a large triangle (Christmas Tree) with the fruit dip decanted into a bowl of your own and covered in plastic wrap. Then it will look like you cut up all the fruit and made the dip from scratch and did all the arranging yourself and are artistic.

You'll need to already own a suitable tray and a nice decorative bowl. Multiple tiny bowls like custard cups would also work. Check the internet for a picture to give you a guideline to go for. You want some green stuff to be the tree, such as honeydew melon, green grapes or sliced kiwi or a combination of those.

If you buy the fruit tray and then decide even this is too much work you can always just bring it in, as is.
posted by Jane the Brown at 9:15 AM on December 17, 2019 [3 favorites]


Buy some spinach dip, place it into a nice bowl. Buy a loaf of bread and chop that up into bite size chunks. Use a round loaf if you want to hollow it out and place the dip inside it. Or don't.

If you can, heat up the dip in the microwave for about 1-2 minutes and it will taste even better.
posted by hydra77 at 9:21 AM on December 17, 2019 [2 favorites]


I was binge watching River Cottage on youtube when this turned up: lazy pasta. There are two recipes in there, and specially the second one looks like something you could bring to a potluck if there is a re-heating possibility.

Or buy a charcuterie roast chicken, some romaine salad and make a Caesar salad. I wouldn't buy a bottled dressing, but I would buy a mayo and blend it with anchovies, garlic and grated parmesan cheese rather than making it all from scratch. Not as cheap as the pasta, though if you make it with croutons instead of chicken, which is more authentic, I think, it almost will be. IMO it does have to be homemade croutons then, so more fussy (but still within your 30 minute limitation).

When we were students, a friend of mine would take a drained can of chickpeas and mix it with a can of red sauce cold (choose the sauce you like the best). It was surprisingly delicious. Sprinkle a ton of parsley and some lemon juice on top, and it will feel like some special Middle Eastern recipe. Put pita bread triangles on the side of it if you want to stress that theme.

70's style tuna mousse: blend a can of tuna with half the volume of butter and half of mayo, two spring onions, a spoonful of capers, half a tomato or two cherry tomatoes. Season with pepper. Let cool in a nice bowl till serving. This can be made a day ahead. Serve sprinkled with capers with a crusty baguette. If you turn it out on a plate before serving, surround it with tomato slices (if using a whole tomato) or cherry tomato halves.
In general, presentation means a lot to most people and it often takes less than five minutes. If I can, I bring my own serving dishes and also do the final presentation on arrival at potlucks.

For a sweet option, here's Pioneer Woman's Pots de Crème a l’Orange. It's so good and easy that I have bought a lot of very cheap little glasses to serve it in, because I do it again and again. But they look fine in little plastic beakers as well. This is a dessert that makes people think you are a better person than you really are.
posted by mumimor at 9:25 AM on December 17, 2019 [7 favorites]


Do you have a slow cooker? This cowboy beans recipe should be fairly cheap and is 20 minutes active time. You could use canned beans.
posted by ftm at 9:25 AM on December 17, 2019


Taco Layer Dip with tortilla chips. I don't use the cream cheese, only sour cream. I also top with fresh sliced jalapeño.

I've made two layer dips with ground beef this month and they take less than a half hour. Once you cook the beef (or turkey) it takes minutes to add the rest of the ingredients. People love it. Make it in a 9x13 disposable aluminum pan and you won't have to worry about lugging home a dish.
posted by loveandhappiness at 9:29 AM on December 17, 2019


Block of velveeta. Can of rotel. (Multiply as needed.) Put both in a slow cooker. Bring tortilla chips. Done.
posted by Weeping_angel at 9:33 AM on December 17, 2019 [8 favorites]


Is it this afternoon, or tomorrow?

If tomorrow, how about Firecrackers? As cheap as can be, and people love them. This recipe says to stand them on end in a Tupperware, but I just throw everything in a giant ziploc and flip it a few times over the course of an evening. Nothing to wash but the measuring cup :)
posted by slenderloris at 9:40 AM on December 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


I have also employed this old family recipe in a pinch: go to grocery store deli counter, buy red-skinned potato salad (or whatever), put in a fancy bowl, cover with cling wrap, take credit.
posted by Weeping_angel at 9:41 AM on December 17, 2019 [28 favorites]


Buy two or three bags of frozen meatballs and the same number of jars of tomato sauce. Dump it all in a slow cooker and set it on whatever temp seems right given how much time you have. This is usually one of the most popular dishes and it always gets a stupid amount of compliments for how easy it is.
posted by stellaluna at 9:43 AM on December 17, 2019 [5 favorites]


Fruit tray or DIY cut-up apples and pears, and this dead-easy fruit dip. (Marshmallow fluff and cream cheese, which makes little to no sense until you try it. Add cinnamon sprinkles or Cool Whip if you're so inclined.) (Apologies for auto-play in link.) If you DIY apples and pears, this quick saltwalter rinse prevents browning while the fruit slices are in the communal trough.

on preview: the meatball rec also works with cream of mushroom soup and cream cheese, for "Swedish" meatballs. And the grocery-store buy in own bowl works too, esp. if you stop in the produce aisle for fresh parsley to dice and sprinkle on top of your creation.
posted by Iris Gambol at 9:55 AM on December 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


This gado-gado dip from Lucky Peach's 101 Easy Asian Recipes is amazing, just get a veggie tray and rearrange it nicely on a platter and put a dish of this in the middle. People go nuts for it.

INGREDIENTS
1 fresh red chili, such as Holland or Fresno, or 1/4—1/2 t chili flakes
1 garlic clove
1/2 C peanut butter
3 T lime juice
3 T brown sugar
2 T fish sauce
1 T soy sauce
1/4 C hot water
+ kosher salt

PREPARATION
Combine the chili, garlic, peanut butter, lime juice, sugar, fish sauce, and soy sauce in a blender and process until smooth. With the blender running, drizzle in the hot water and process until creamy. It should have a honey-like consistency. If it doesn’t, add more water by the tablespoon. Season to taste with salt. The dip will keep, covered and refrigerated, for 3 days.
posted by exceptinsects at 9:57 AM on December 17, 2019 [7 favorites]


The meatball thing also works with grape jelly (really) and BBQ sauce!
posted by Weeping_angel at 9:58 AM on December 17, 2019 [6 favorites]


We had to put something together on short notice just a couple of days ago. Here's our go-to emergency potluck dish (which I think I originally got from Ask):

Southwest Corn and Bean Salad

1 can black beans, drained and rinsed
1 can sweet corn, drained and rinsed

Combine in a bowl with enough room to stir. Add

1 tsp each black pepper and chili powder
2 Tbsp balsamic vinegar and EVOO.

Mix thoroughly. Ready to serve or refrigerate until ready.
posted by maurice at 10:12 AM on December 17, 2019 [3 favorites]


Here ya go.

Buy a pound or two of chicken salad from the deli.
Buy a bag of Hawaiian sweet rolls, the little slider roll ones.
Go home and boil a bunch of elbow macaroni. Drain and cool to room temperature.
Mix the cooled elbow macaroni with the chicken salad together and dump in a bowl. Cover and refrigerate.

Drag bowl and bag of rolls to office party. Throw on the counter.
posted by HeyAllie at 10:21 AM on December 17, 2019 [4 favorites]


Going a step further on Weeping_angel's suggestion, you just bring your fancy bowl to the deli, they will put it on the scale, zero it out, and then fill the bowl directly with fancy potato salad. Boom.
posted by radioamy at 10:39 AM on December 17, 2019 [9 favorites]


Super easy corn salad. I use three cans of corn for this set of ingredients.
posted by watch out for turtles at 10:51 AM on December 17, 2019


Came here to say brickle or as leahwrenn mentioned, Christmas Cracker Cookies, also known as Christmas Crack. So easy. Super popular.
posted by yawper at 11:53 AM on December 17, 2019


Buy two or three bags of frozen meatballs and the same number of jars of tomato sauce.

Take this to the next level of 70s amazing by subbing a 50/50 mix of Heinz Chili Sauce and Grape Jelly (sounds foul, tastes incredible).
posted by Exceptional_Hubris at 11:55 AM on December 17, 2019 [4 favorites]


You can also sub Lil’ Smokies (those little cocktail sausage things) for the meatballs in the grape jelly and chili sauce.
posted by Weeping_angel at 12:10 PM on December 17, 2019


Boil some pasta and mix in good quality pesto. Let cool. Add halved cherry tomatoes and those little mozzarella balls. Your yummy pasta salad is done.
posted by speakeasy at 12:40 PM on December 17, 2019 [2 favorites]


I asked more or less the same question. I brought "pasta salad:" rotini pasta with vinaigrette and sun dried tomatoes from a jar. You could add basil or spinach-from-a-bag if you wanted to.
posted by slidell at 12:49 PM on December 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


Buy a roll of Pillsbury croissants and a jar of pesto. Cut croissant triangles in half and spoon pesto onto one side of each--roll them up so the pesto is contained within the rolls (it will be greasy). Bake according to instructions on can. Put a tea towel in a tin or rubbermaid container and load those little suckers in. Fold tea towel around warm croissants until it's time to place on table.
posted by Miss T.Horn at 1:46 PM on December 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


My lazy go-to is Tex-Mex Cranberry Salsa and some Tostitos Scoops. Unusual enough that it makes people go "Whoa, wild!" before eating all of it because it's tasty, easy enough that chopping up jalapeños and scallions is the most labor-intensive part.

Note: the recipe that I linked to makes this dish sound way more difficult than it actually is. Ignore all of the directions related to fresh cranberries and just use a can of cranberry jelly. I also never put cilantro, fresh or otherwise, in this salsa and it tastes fine, so there's another step you can drop.

Edit to add: it's best to make this the night before so everything has time to meld together, flavor-wise. That's it. That's the only trick. Good luck!
posted by helloimjennsco at 2:20 PM on December 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


This cheesy hash brown casserole is super easy and everyone loves it. You can even make it in a crock pot if you omit the cornflake topping. But the topping is delicious, well worth the 30 seconds of extra effort.
posted by Serene Empress Dork at 2:34 PM on December 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


you guys are making me very hungry.

ok, my idea: make box mix brownies into which you have mixed maybe half a tsp of mint extract. frost with canned fudge frosting, smash up some candy canes and sprinkle them on top.
posted by fingersandtoes at 2:40 PM on December 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


Black and White Bean Salad: 1 can of white beans, 1 can of black beans. Drain. Add a cup of your favorite salsa. Add some ground cumin, some red wine vinegar (or whatever you have) and a bunch of chopped parsley. You can also add some diced peppers, red, yellow, whatever and some green onions. There you go.
posted by lois1950 at 3:49 PM on December 17, 2019


Since there have been so many great recipes, I am just swimming against the flow to say that I misdoubt me if anyone will care if you just don't bring something. I still remember an old friend and coworker who came to the office Christmas potluck one year with a "licorice and cheese plate." It was obvious that the only thing he had in the house when he realized it was potluck day was a half bag of red licorice and a pack of individually-wrapper American "cheese." Needless to say, even after thirty years someone reminds him of this at least a few times a year around the holidays.
posted by Gilgamesh's Chauffeur at 6:21 PM on December 17, 2019 [2 favorites]


If you have a slow cooker: slice up a kielbasa or two and put in slow cooker. Add a lot of brown sugar (half a box, maybe?). Heat for a few hours. Put toothpicks out for people to use to spear them.

The sugar and the fat from the kielbasa melt together into a great, sticky sauce without anything else needed.
posted by current resident at 7:37 PM on December 17, 2019 [1 favorite]


If you're truly not feeling it, offer to bring napkins, plates, cutlery and/or drinks. Extremely low effort, but always appreciated.
posted by peppermind at 6:06 AM on December 18, 2019 [1 favorite]


Whole berry cranberry sauce is the simplest, most impressive holiday potluck contribution ever.
posted by zem at 8:21 AM on December 18, 2019


2 cans black beans, rinsed
1 bag frozen sweet corn
1 jar sliced green olives
Finely chopped cilantro (or parsley)
Juice of a lime (or two)
Salt (and pepper?) to taste

Mix it all together in bowl. Serve. It works well as a side salad.
posted by pingzing at 9:28 AM on December 18, 2019 [1 favorite]


Log of goat cheese topped with half a jar of decent spicy tomato sauce (like arrabbiata, not Ro-Tel). Heat briefly, serve with sliced baguette.
posted by scyllary at 8:43 PM on December 18, 2019


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