How to get over this #firstworldproblem
April 6, 2018 7:20 AM Subscribe
I'm super duper bummed that I'm missing the cherry blossoms in Japan because they bloomed way earlier than expected. I know this is a privileged problem to have but I'm seriously sad and I need help getting over it.
I will be going to Tokyo in a few days for a week-long trip. This is something I've looked forward to for a long time because I was super excited to see cherry blossoms, particularly across Tokyo, and I don't foresee myself getting another chance like this again. For me, seeing the cherry blossoms in Japan is a once in a lifetime experience in a way that's different from other places because of the age of the trees, the culture, and the general vibe during cherry blossom season (I've lived vicariously through stories people have told me, Instagram, and blog posts I've read over the years).
But due to unexpectedly warm weather, the blossoms bloomed way earlier than expected and the bloom is almost entirely over now in Tokyo.
I'm super bummed and I feel like I can't talk to any of my friends or family about it because it'll just come off as privileged whining. But the truth is I am really super duper sad.
I know there will be blooms farther up north and in the mountains but due to cost (I am not buying a JR pass) and just the amount of time it'll take to get there it's not really feasible. I'll try and swing a trip to the Fuji area to see some blooms but my schedule is a bit tight since I'll be meeting some people in Tokyo and have to be there on particular dates/times.
Anyway, I'm looking for help for getting myself over this...I don't know when the next time I'll go to Japan, much less for cherry blossoms, as I'm planning to have a family and in my culture/family that means settling and not going off anywhere for a very long time. So I guess I also saw this trip as one of my last free escapes which is another reason why I feel crushed that I won't be seeing the blooms. Advice, hard smacks of truth, anecdotes, whatever all welcome to help me get over myself! Thanks!
I will be going to Tokyo in a few days for a week-long trip. This is something I've looked forward to for a long time because I was super excited to see cherry blossoms, particularly across Tokyo, and I don't foresee myself getting another chance like this again. For me, seeing the cherry blossoms in Japan is a once in a lifetime experience in a way that's different from other places because of the age of the trees, the culture, and the general vibe during cherry blossom season (I've lived vicariously through stories people have told me, Instagram, and blog posts I've read over the years).
But due to unexpectedly warm weather, the blossoms bloomed way earlier than expected and the bloom is almost entirely over now in Tokyo.
I'm super bummed and I feel like I can't talk to any of my friends or family about it because it'll just come off as privileged whining. But the truth is I am really super duper sad.
I know there will be blooms farther up north and in the mountains but due to cost (I am not buying a JR pass) and just the amount of time it'll take to get there it's not really feasible. I'll try and swing a trip to the Fuji area to see some blooms but my schedule is a bit tight since I'll be meeting some people in Tokyo and have to be there on particular dates/times.
Anyway, I'm looking for help for getting myself over this...I don't know when the next time I'll go to Japan, much less for cherry blossoms, as I'm planning to have a family and in my culture/family that means settling and not going off anywhere for a very long time. So I guess I also saw this trip as one of my last free escapes which is another reason why I feel crushed that I won't be seeing the blooms. Advice, hard smacks of truth, anecdotes, whatever all welcome to help me get over myself! Thanks!
Hey there life is long. Japan is not so far away; you can have this opportunity again. Keep dreaming of blossoms in Tokyo.
In the meanwhile, plant a cherry tree where you settle with your family and enjoy them blooming together year after year.
posted by notyou at 7:34 AM on April 6, 2018 [11 favorites]
In the meanwhile, plant a cherry tree where you settle with your family and enjoy them blooming together year after year.
posted by notyou at 7:34 AM on April 6, 2018 [11 favorites]
I think the poignancy of not seeing the cherry blossoms is the same kind of poignancy that makes the cherry blossoms so beautiful in the first place.
Their delicacy and ephemerality is what defines them. Lean into the sadness. Knowing that the blossoms' beauty can't last and that you will never be able to *fully* experience it is an inherent part of truly, fully experiencing their beauty.
posted by rue72 at 7:35 AM on April 6, 2018 [55 favorites]
Their delicacy and ephemerality is what defines them. Lean into the sadness. Knowing that the blossoms' beauty can't last and that you will never be able to *fully* experience it is an inherent part of truly, fully experiencing their beauty.
posted by rue72 at 7:35 AM on April 6, 2018 [55 favorites]
I'm actually going to say you don't have to 'get over' this. It's okay to be disappointed about missing something that feels once-in-a-lifetime. So, you know, let yourself be disappointed. But! Try to make sure your disappointment doesn't overshadow your trip, and stay open to different kinds of once-in-a-lifetime experiences that you might have while you're there. Maybe by missing peak bloom, you'll be able to have a less-crowded, less-hectic viewing, and you'll really enjoy it; maybe the full crowds would have ended up bothering you. Maybe you'll end up experiencing something totally unrelated to the blossoms, something unexpected and amazing, that you would otherwise have missed. You won't know until you go!
posted by halation at 7:36 AM on April 6, 2018 [8 favorites]
posted by halation at 7:36 AM on April 6, 2018 [8 favorites]
I think the most appropriate thing to do in this situation would be to write a poem.
Now, hear me out. I have a Japanese Literature degree is this is one of the rare situations where it is useful. A large chunk of the literary output of Japan is musing on the beauty of cherry blossoms. Eventually, writing about actually seeing the cherry blossoms became passé and the real thing became writing about missing the cherry blossoms. It got to the point where people would be annoyed if they *didn't* mistime the cherry blossoms because the subject for their delightfully emo poem would have to change.
I would suggest channeling your feelings into a poem that will last a lot longer than the cherry blossoms because that's the traditional way of dealing with this situation.
And if you think that's BS you should read some of Yosano Akiko's poetry. She dismantles the whole concept of romanticizing cherry blossoms.
posted by Alison at 7:42 AM on April 6, 2018 [78 favorites]
Now, hear me out. I have a Japanese Literature degree is this is one of the rare situations where it is useful. A large chunk of the literary output of Japan is musing on the beauty of cherry blossoms. Eventually, writing about actually seeing the cherry blossoms became passé and the real thing became writing about missing the cherry blossoms. It got to the point where people would be annoyed if they *didn't* mistime the cherry blossoms because the subject for their delightfully emo poem would have to change.
I would suggest channeling your feelings into a poem that will last a lot longer than the cherry blossoms because that's the traditional way of dealing with this situation.
And if you think that's BS you should read some of Yosano Akiko's poetry. She dismantles the whole concept of romanticizing cherry blossoms.
posted by Alison at 7:42 AM on April 6, 2018 [78 favorites]
You are totally justified in being bummed out about missing this.
I’m someone who enjoys astronomical events. One of the things I like about them is that seeing them really depends on being at the right place at the right time. When you hit it, you hit it and it’s the greatest feeling in the world. When you miss it? Sure, it sucks, but you just have to accept it and move on. I was very fortunate that I witnessed the 2017 total solar eclipse from my airport hotel in Nashville while people I knew who were in downtown Nashville saw only clouds. I told myself that morning that if there were clouds then I would just be happy I made the attempt.
For the 2012 transit of Venus I bought solar filters for my camera, made a filter for my binoculars, bought eclipse glasses. I was all set for it. The morning of the transit was rainy and cloudy. The next one won’t be until 2117. I will not get another chance to see a transit of Venus unless maybe I can store my head in a jar. I accepted this and I moved on.
Japan isn’t going anywhere. The cherry trees will blossom every year. It’s true that you missed out on it this time around. You can always go back. Maybe not for many years, but you can. You don’t have to wait until 2117. There are also cherry trees elsewhere in the world that will bloom. And certainly there is more to enjoy about Japan than the cherry trees.
Life is filled with all sorts of events that require us to be at the right place at the right time. Sometimes we miss out. Life goes on, and there are many, many wondrous events and places to enjoy.
I'm sorry you missed the cherry blossoms but I know you'll get to see them one day. It's nice to have something to look forward to.
posted by bondcliff at 7:44 AM on April 6, 2018 [5 favorites]
I’m someone who enjoys astronomical events. One of the things I like about them is that seeing them really depends on being at the right place at the right time. When you hit it, you hit it and it’s the greatest feeling in the world. When you miss it? Sure, it sucks, but you just have to accept it and move on. I was very fortunate that I witnessed the 2017 total solar eclipse from my airport hotel in Nashville while people I knew who were in downtown Nashville saw only clouds. I told myself that morning that if there were clouds then I would just be happy I made the attempt.
For the 2012 transit of Venus I bought solar filters for my camera, made a filter for my binoculars, bought eclipse glasses. I was all set for it. The morning of the transit was rainy and cloudy. The next one won’t be until 2117. I will not get another chance to see a transit of Venus unless maybe I can store my head in a jar. I accepted this and I moved on.
Japan isn’t going anywhere. The cherry trees will blossom every year. It’s true that you missed out on it this time around. You can always go back. Maybe not for many years, but you can. You don’t have to wait until 2117. There are also cherry trees elsewhere in the world that will bloom. And certainly there is more to enjoy about Japan than the cherry trees.
Life is filled with all sorts of events that require us to be at the right place at the right time. Sometimes we miss out. Life goes on, and there are many, many wondrous events and places to enjoy.
I'm sorry you missed the cherry blossoms but I know you'll get to see them one day. It's nice to have something to look forward to.
posted by bondcliff at 7:44 AM on April 6, 2018 [5 favorites]
Cherry blossoms come every year. I know you said you don't think you'll ever get to travel like this again, but travel is changing and if you keep your eyes open for opportunities you'll be able to find a way. While you're there this year, delve into the trip with no regrets. There will still be so many things happening, early spring is a big time for Tokyo and even the locals get into the spirit of things, and that will still happen even though the petals have fallen. The cherry blossoms are the showiest, but there are beautiful things everywhere you look.
I honestly think that just the process of traveling and being there and enjoying the place and people will help you get over your sadness, and that's just a few days away. Until then, go ahead and feel sad. You're allowed to feel sadness about this. Cherry blossoms are in part a big deal because they're something incredible that everyone is able to enjoy, regardless of class. Being sad about missing them isn't a first world problem, it's an incredibly universal feeling.
After your awesome trip is over, you might start planning a way to get to D.C. during their cherry blossom season. It's not at all the same, but it's the same trees, it happens every year, and there are many ways to make it special that might be more attainable for you.
posted by Mizu at 7:47 AM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
I honestly think that just the process of traveling and being there and enjoying the place and people will help you get over your sadness, and that's just a few days away. Until then, go ahead and feel sad. You're allowed to feel sadness about this. Cherry blossoms are in part a big deal because they're something incredible that everyone is able to enjoy, regardless of class. Being sad about missing them isn't a first world problem, it's an incredibly universal feeling.
After your awesome trip is over, you might start planning a way to get to D.C. during their cherry blossom season. It's not at all the same, but it's the same trees, it happens every year, and there are many ways to make it special that might be more attainable for you.
posted by Mizu at 7:47 AM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
As you make your own family, you can begin to make your own customs as well. Maybe it won't be financially realistic to go back to Japan for a while, but even a decade or two truly isn't that long for a young-ish person, especially if that time involves establishing yourself and/or raising a child/children. In the meanwhile, you absolutely can still travel and have experiences, either independently or with your family. However, it's very okay to be sad and disappointed now about this experience you wanted to have.
posted by teremala at 7:51 AM on April 6, 2018
posted by teremala at 7:51 AM on April 6, 2018
To cope with disappointment, I say to myself, for example: "if this is the worst thing that happens to me this year, then I will be doing pretty well", but then again I always want to slap other people when they say stuff like that to me.
posted by thelonius at 7:54 AM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
posted by thelonius at 7:54 AM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
If this "once in a lifetime" experience is really that important to you, you can spend the extra $150 or whatever and just take the train a couple of hours to someplace where the cherry trees are still blooming. There are shinkansen trains heading north from Tokyo several times an hour.
posted by Umami Dearest at 8:06 AM on April 6, 2018 [13 favorites]
posted by Umami Dearest at 8:06 AM on April 6, 2018 [13 favorites]
According to this site, there's some blossom varieties that bloom later - maybe there's still some spots where you could see those? Even if not, Tokyo is still an amazing place to visit any time of the year.
I know the feeling - I've always wanted to see a total eclipse. I planned over a year out to see the one this past summer, flew halfway across the country, drove for hours to a prime viewing spot, only to have an unexpected thouderstorm move in less than 10 minutes before totality. I was crushed, but I reminded myself that there will be other eclipses, and am already brainstorming a way to (hopefully) see the next one in 2024.
posted by photo guy at 8:23 AM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
I know the feeling - I've always wanted to see a total eclipse. I planned over a year out to see the one this past summer, flew halfway across the country, drove for hours to a prime viewing spot, only to have an unexpected thouderstorm move in less than 10 minutes before totality. I was crushed, but I reminded myself that there will be other eclipses, and am already brainstorming a way to (hopefully) see the next one in 2024.
posted by photo guy at 8:23 AM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
I just last week missed the cherry blossoms in DC because they're blooming LATE this year. Goddamn cherries. You can't win.
Also, as an idiot teen I missed Halley's comet despite the fact that there was a telescope set up and trained on the comet in my front yard. Just couldn't be bothered. I was probably engrossed in a VC Andrews novel. By the time it comes back if I'm alive at all my eyes will have shriveled up like a couple of dried peas.
posted by Don Pepino at 9:28 AM on April 6, 2018 [9 favorites]
Also, as an idiot teen I missed Halley's comet despite the fact that there was a telescope set up and trained on the comet in my front yard. Just couldn't be bothered. I was probably engrossed in a VC Andrews novel. By the time it comes back if I'm alive at all my eyes will have shriveled up like a couple of dried peas.
posted by Don Pepino at 9:28 AM on April 6, 2018 [9 favorites]
I'm sorry the timing of this trip didn't work out for you. Of course you're going to feel disappointed that a trip you carefully planned and looked forward to won't turn out as you had hoped.
To me part of the pleasure of travel is taking experiences as they come and finding beauty and and enjoyment in unexpected places—but another part is accomplishing those "bucket list" items that are unique to a particular time and area. If I were you I would rearrange my schedule and take the bullet train up north for a day. No requirement to book a Japan Rail pass in advance (and when I priced it out for a trip earlier this year, it wasn't worth it for one trip).
If that truly isn't feasible due to time or budget constraints, consider that babies and toddlers are small and portable enough that traveling as a family doesn't have to be a logistic nightmare or cost-prohibitive. I know a few people (including my own parents) who took international trips with toddler-age kids and had a really good time. They had to take some things a little slower but were still able to experience quite a bit, and cute small kids also provide a natural conversation-starter for chatting with locals.
posted by 4rtemis at 9:34 AM on April 6, 2018
To me part of the pleasure of travel is taking experiences as they come and finding beauty and and enjoyment in unexpected places—but another part is accomplishing those "bucket list" items that are unique to a particular time and area. If I were you I would rearrange my schedule and take the bullet train up north for a day. No requirement to book a Japan Rail pass in advance (and when I priced it out for a trip earlier this year, it wasn't worth it for one trip).
If that truly isn't feasible due to time or budget constraints, consider that babies and toddlers are small and portable enough that traveling as a family doesn't have to be a logistic nightmare or cost-prohibitive. I know a few people (including my own parents) who took international trips with toddler-age kids and had a really good time. They had to take some things a little slower but were still able to experience quite a bit, and cute small kids also provide a natural conversation-starter for chatting with locals.
posted by 4rtemis at 9:34 AM on April 6, 2018
So I guess I also saw this trip as one of my last free escapes which is another reason why I feel crushed that I won't be seeing the blooms.
I have travelled more, alone, since having kids than before. I hear you about your culture and family but I give you permission *now* to be the crazy parent who looks for every bargain and kids her kids hand me downs and second-hand everything so that you can stuff dollars in a box in your drawer and place your kids in the care of relatives or your spouse for one week to go fulfill this dream again - and again, and again if you want, culminating in your grown children chipping together for you to go to Tokyo for a *month* for your 65th birthday.
It's just fine to mourn this! But do not cut your dreams off at the knees!
posted by warriorqueen at 9:34 AM on April 6, 2018 [11 favorites]
I have travelled more, alone, since having kids than before. I hear you about your culture and family but I give you permission *now* to be the crazy parent who looks for every bargain and kids her kids hand me downs and second-hand everything so that you can stuff dollars in a box in your drawer and place your kids in the care of relatives or your spouse for one week to go fulfill this dream again - and again, and again if you want, culminating in your grown children chipping together for you to go to Tokyo for a *month* for your 65th birthday.
It's just fine to mourn this! But do not cut your dreams off at the knees!
posted by warriorqueen at 9:34 AM on April 6, 2018 [11 favorites]
Umami Dearest is right--if it's that meaningful to you, it would be worth it to take a train out of Tokyo and see the flowers in a different city or area. I know you said you were excited to see them "particularly across Tokyo," and I'm sorry and understand your disappointment that that's not possible this time, but in another city they'll still be beautiful, I assure you! And you might find it easier to enjoy viewing them with a smaller crowd, too.
Visit this page to track where the flowers are blooming, and consider taking a train from Tokyo to Matsumoto or Fuji Five Lakes (often marked on signs, etc. as "Fuji Go-ko," btw) to see the blossoms there. There's a lot of beautiful cities, towns, and landscapes to see in Japan outside of Tokyo!
posted by honey wheat at 9:35 AM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
Visit this page to track where the flowers are blooming, and consider taking a train from Tokyo to Matsumoto or Fuji Five Lakes (often marked on signs, etc. as "Fuji Go-ko," btw) to see the blossoms there. There's a lot of beautiful cities, towns, and landscapes to see in Japan outside of Tokyo!
posted by honey wheat at 9:35 AM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
Edit: Sorry, I should have said Takayama, not Matsumoto, as it looks from that webpage like the blossoms in Matsumoto will be past their peak when you get there--but take a look at the page I linked and you'll see that you have a number of options! Enjoy your day trip to see the blossoms, and take in the joys of the Japanese tourism road less traveled!
posted by honey wheat at 9:40 AM on April 6, 2018 [1 favorite]
posted by honey wheat at 9:40 AM on April 6, 2018 [1 favorite]
I'm going to join the chorus of people saying you have the right to be sad about this. I went to Tokyo last year, and we had booked a tour to Mount Fuji in advance. I wasn't really aware of this, but if it's a cloudy day you basically won't be able to see Mount Fuji while on the tour.
As it turns out, every single day we were in Tokyo, the weather was cloudy and rainy - except the day we went to Mount Fuji. We very much lucked out on happening to have a clear day when we went, and we had a nice view. However, everyone who went on that tour any of the other days that week had their once-in-a-lifetime view of Mount Fuji ruined. I bet they were sad about it, and they have every right to be. It's a big deal for everyone who goes on that tour.
Just because you are able to go on this trip doesn't mean you aren't allowed to be disappointed if some aspects of it don't pan out the way you dreamed they would. That being said, I hope you are able to find other things to enjoy on your trip to Japan. I loved every day I was there, even when my shoes got soaked from the rain and I was walking around for hours with cold, wet feet.
posted by bananana at 10:30 AM on April 6, 2018 [1 favorite]
As it turns out, every single day we were in Tokyo, the weather was cloudy and rainy - except the day we went to Mount Fuji. We very much lucked out on happening to have a clear day when we went, and we had a nice view. However, everyone who went on that tour any of the other days that week had their once-in-a-lifetime view of Mount Fuji ruined. I bet they were sad about it, and they have every right to be. It's a big deal for everyone who goes on that tour.
Just because you are able to go on this trip doesn't mean you aren't allowed to be disappointed if some aspects of it don't pan out the way you dreamed they would. That being said, I hope you are able to find other things to enjoy on your trip to Japan. I loved every day I was there, even when my shoes got soaked from the rain and I was walking around for hours with cold, wet feet.
posted by bananana at 10:30 AM on April 6, 2018 [1 favorite]
It's definitely disappointing, and you shouldn't beat yourself up for being sad about it. Missing ephemeral things and the resulting wistfulness is I think a pretty universal experience.
Part of the magic of hanami is I think the excitement of collectively enjoying something so fleeting. I hope you can find other comparatively magic moments in Tokyo. Would you be interested in, for example, going to the Azalea Festival at Nezu Shrine in Tokyo? It's certainly not exactly the same, but definitely beautiful and festive and special, and not something you could do any other time of year. There's also the spectacular peony garden in Toshogu Shrine in Ueno Park, or treating yourself to tea in Hamarikyu Gardens.
Obviously none of these will be the same or replace the opportunity you've lost, but I think you can still have a wonderful time and feel great creating a different experience in Tokyo that embraces that same kind of ephemeral spring beauty. I'm jealous - I've only been to Japan in the winter and I think you will love the spring gardens no matter what is blooming!
posted by bowtiesarecool at 12:04 PM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
Part of the magic of hanami is I think the excitement of collectively enjoying something so fleeting. I hope you can find other comparatively magic moments in Tokyo. Would you be interested in, for example, going to the Azalea Festival at Nezu Shrine in Tokyo? It's certainly not exactly the same, but definitely beautiful and festive and special, and not something you could do any other time of year. There's also the spectacular peony garden in Toshogu Shrine in Ueno Park, or treating yourself to tea in Hamarikyu Gardens.
Obviously none of these will be the same or replace the opportunity you've lost, but I think you can still have a wonderful time and feel great creating a different experience in Tokyo that embraces that same kind of ephemeral spring beauty. I'm jealous - I've only been to Japan in the winter and I think you will love the spring gardens no matter what is blooming!
posted by bowtiesarecool at 12:04 PM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
Good news! Even though you won't be there during peak bloom, some trees may still be in bloom and it will be slightly less crowded. I live in D.C. (which has a similar climate to Tokyo) and our cherry blossoms peaked last weekend, but there will still be blossoms on the trees for a few weeks. Peak blooms usually last around 14 days and while there are fewer trees in bloom after that, there are still a fair number that take their time to blossom and are equally as pretty.
It may also hearten you to know that gardens may be even more beautiful post the cherry blossom peak bloom! Even though DC's cherry blossoms are in peak bloom right now, most spring perennials are not at full bloom yet. Daffodils and crocuses are around, but not in full display and only a few tulips have bloomed. It's very picturesque to find a late blooming cherry tree surrounded by spring flowers.
I'm really sorry that you are missing peak bloom. I get really into planning for my vacations and it's a real bummer when my best laid plains are foiled by something beyond my control.
posted by donut_princess at 1:22 PM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
It may also hearten you to know that gardens may be even more beautiful post the cherry blossom peak bloom! Even though DC's cherry blossoms are in peak bloom right now, most spring perennials are not at full bloom yet. Daffodils and crocuses are around, but not in full display and only a few tulips have bloomed. It's very picturesque to find a late blooming cherry tree surrounded by spring flowers.
I'm really sorry that you are missing peak bloom. I get really into planning for my vacations and it's a real bummer when my best laid plains are foiled by something beyond my control.
posted by donut_princess at 1:22 PM on April 6, 2018 [2 favorites]
That is super disappointing, but maybe you can also refocus a little; it looks like you'll be there when the wisteria is in season which looks amazing and might be enough of a similar, though different, experience that you won't feel it's a wasted trip.
(We walked through a bunch of empty wisteria trellis on our visit and wondered at how it would look, but didn't have to much time to get bummed as we'd be distracted by the bright burst of hydrangea which were in season and amazing! )
posted by platypus of the universe at 2:32 PM on April 6, 2018 [1 favorite]
(We walked through a bunch of empty wisteria trellis on our visit and wondered at how it would look, but didn't have to much time to get bummed as we'd be distracted by the bright burst of hydrangea which were in season and amazing! )
posted by platypus of the universe at 2:32 PM on April 6, 2018 [1 favorite]
I have incurable cancer and I think you have every right to feel hugely disappointed. I really hate the whole “first world problems” thing. Sure, you can always find someone worse off than you, and sometimes that can help with appreciating what you have, but you have a right to your feelings. I also saw an essay by a man from a third world country who hates the implication that people in third world countries don’t also have to deal with minor problems. He feels the first world problem idea leads to stereotyping of people in third world countries.
I also agree with those who say don’t assume you can’t achieve this dream. Life is full of opportunities and surprises you can’t imagine right now. This internet stranger is hoping you’ll make this happen some day.
posted by FencingGal at 4:12 PM on April 6, 2018 [3 favorites]
I also agree with those who say don’t assume you can’t achieve this dream. Life is full of opportunities and surprises you can’t imagine right now. This internet stranger is hoping you’ll make this happen some day.
posted by FencingGal at 4:12 PM on April 6, 2018 [3 favorites]
I was in Japan for a couple of cherry blossom seasons and it was never that great. All of the famous parks are packed with people having their hanami parties, so it's crowded, noisy and filled with drunk people. Even at night. The best bits are streets and rivers that have stands of trees but no real places for people to sit. To be honest, the plum blossoms look much nicer but don't get nearly as much love because you can't enjoy them in your t-shirt. I think a lot of the excitement around the cherry blossoms is because people are supposed to be excited about them. And that everyone can get drunk in the park in the daytime.
Also, as you're starting a family let me tell you that Japan is one of the best places to travel to with kids. Its extremely safe, there are decent facilities for changing kids, and its a pretty good ice breaker for random encounters with strangers. Also there are lots of cute mascots to take pictures with. So maybe you'll be able to visit with your family and see the cherry blossoms in the future.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 6:17 PM on April 6, 2018 [1 favorite]
Also, as you're starting a family let me tell you that Japan is one of the best places to travel to with kids. Its extremely safe, there are decent facilities for changing kids, and its a pretty good ice breaker for random encounters with strangers. Also there are lots of cute mascots to take pictures with. So maybe you'll be able to visit with your family and see the cherry blossoms in the future.
posted by any portmanteau in a storm at 6:17 PM on April 6, 2018 [1 favorite]
You are totally justified in feeling disappointed about this. You should not feel like you have to apologize for it. But you should not rule out a trip up north. It really doesn’t take long or require any complex arrangements — could be an overnight or even a day trip if need be — and will be a welcome break from the crowds in Tokyo.
posted by chimpsonfilm at 7:47 PM on April 6, 2018
posted by chimpsonfilm at 7:47 PM on April 6, 2018
Good news! Even though you won't be there during peak bloom, some trees may still be in bloom
Sorry, but this is simply not true. I live in Tokyo, and looking down from my window now I can see a big cherry tree that was in full bloom eight or nine days ago, and the flowers are just completely gone now.
Just reframing my comments to the OP earlier - I think what you will feel in the future won't be disappointment (that you missed the cherry blossoms) but perhaps regret - regret that you were in Japan during cherry-blossom season, you had said that you were excited about this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and yet you couldn't be bothered to spend an extra couple of hours and a bit of train fare to actually go see them.
(It's really not hard to do - you don't need to book your trains in advance, and you don't need to stay overnight.)
posted by Umami Dearest at 8:43 PM on April 6, 2018
Sorry, but this is simply not true. I live in Tokyo, and looking down from my window now I can see a big cherry tree that was in full bloom eight or nine days ago, and the flowers are just completely gone now.
Just reframing my comments to the OP earlier - I think what you will feel in the future won't be disappointment (that you missed the cherry blossoms) but perhaps regret - regret that you were in Japan during cherry-blossom season, you had said that you were excited about this once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and yet you couldn't be bothered to spend an extra couple of hours and a bit of train fare to actually go see them.
(It's really not hard to do - you don't need to book your trains in advance, and you don't need to stay overnight.)
posted by Umami Dearest at 8:43 PM on April 6, 2018
+1 to spending a bit of money and time to see the blooms further north! You don't need a JR pass, you can get a single ticket. And I imagine there will be far fewer crowds than in Tokyo, making for a more enjoyable experience and better photos of the blooms without people in the way.
posted by sunflower16 at 2:59 AM on April 7, 2018
posted by sunflower16 at 2:59 AM on April 7, 2018
Cherry blossoms fall
Some years sooner than others
It is their nature
posted by seanmpuckett at 4:56 AM on April 7, 2018 [3 favorites]
Some years sooner than others
It is their nature
posted by seanmpuckett at 4:56 AM on April 7, 2018 [3 favorites]
I've had a few major holes appear in holiday plans in recent years, from a festival being cancelled because of rain, to a friend being unable to join me on a long-planned train trip because of a family emergency. In each case I had already embarked on my holiday when I got the bad news, and I spent the next couple of days trudging around feeling very deflated, convinced the holiday was pretty-much ruined. But then I started discovering the other cool things about the festival town, or I got caught up in the rhythms and surprises of life on the train - and yes, of course I wished things had worked out according to plan, but here I was on holiday in a new place, and there was so much to notice and enjoy.
That is a huge disappointment about the cherry blossoms, and the idea of setting off for Japan knowing in advance that the plan has fallen through probably makes the disappointment feel more bitter. But once you're there, there will be so much new to distract you, you may have a decent chance of truly enjoying the holiday after all.
posted by kelper at 8:23 AM on April 7, 2018
That is a huge disappointment about the cherry blossoms, and the idea of setting off for Japan knowing in advance that the plan has fallen through probably makes the disappointment feel more bitter. But once you're there, there will be so much new to distract you, you may have a decent chance of truly enjoying the holiday after all.
posted by kelper at 8:23 AM on April 7, 2018
This is a sign. Planning is great... then plans fall through... then exciting, wonderful, totally unexpected things happen.
Celebrate the cherry trees when you get there. Maybe someone will have a tree that is blooming late that they can share with you. Absorb a little of the post-tree culture. Ask "what happens next?"
"Be here now" when you get there.
Coincidence? Maybe not.
May your trip give you what you need.
posted by TrishaU at 9:07 AM on April 7, 2018
Celebrate the cherry trees when you get there. Maybe someone will have a tree that is blooming late that they can share with you. Absorb a little of the post-tree culture. Ask "what happens next?"
"Be here now" when you get there.
Coincidence? Maybe not.
May your trip give you what you need.
posted by TrishaU at 9:07 AM on April 7, 2018
I just wanted to say that in the long run, as Tokyo gears up for the 2020 Olympics and beyond, Japan is only going to get easier and less expensive to visit from the US. Travel as whole is changing - if you just travel with hand luggage and don't bother booking a seat or a meal, you can fly to Spain or Mexico or Norway for almost nothing. What was unimaginably lavish to previous generations of Americans - trips to Iceland for a long weekend, for example - is now so routine that we scroll right on past friends' trips to the Blue Lagoon and Iceland Airwaves. It's also great that you have something so natural and enduring to enjoy; the cherry blossoms still blossomed in the awful springs of 1945 and 2011 in Tokyo, and in this age of comparative peace, safety and prosperity hanami season will be there whenever you get there.
posted by mdonley at 10:17 AM on April 7, 2018
posted by mdonley at 10:17 AM on April 7, 2018
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Assuming it's not work-related meeting up, any chance that some of the people that you're meeting in Tokyo would be up for a trip with you so you can both see the blooms in the Fuji area and hang out with them?
posted by sldownard at 7:34 AM on April 6, 2018 [11 favorites]