2017: Just read a Dilbert and go to sleep.

December 23, 2016 2:44 PM

Help me come up with the wittiest motto for 2017.

By the end of December, my friends and I submit our wittiest mottoes for the coming year. They are usually dark, relevant to recent events, and/or absurd, and they're always funny. I can't think of a good one this year (mostly because I am just sad about everything and none of it comes of as funny). Please help me come up with one and lift my spirits!

Thanks.

posted by PorcupineQuills to Society & Culture (69 answers total)

2017: Just Go Limp.
2017: Lie On Your Back And Think Of England.
2017: This Is Not A Pipe.
2017: 2018 is just a year away.
2017: I Am The Force, The Force Is With Me.
2017: Make America Great Britain Again

Hmm. I am not as witty as I'd thought. 2017 is going to be a tough nut to crack.
posted by Major Matt Mason Dixon at 2:48 PM on December 23, 2016 [1 favorite]

2017: No heroes left to die
posted by biffa at 2:55 PM on December 23, 2016 [13 favorites]

2017: Get your fiddle ready, shit's gonna burn
posted by genehack at 2:57 PM on December 23, 2016 [8 favorites]

2017: ::left intentionally blank::
2017: Orange is the new Black
2017: Its got Electrolytes
2017: Even the Cat Memes Can't Save Us
2017: Cards Against Humanity, Live!
posted by CoffeeHikeNapWine at 2:59 PM on December 23, 2016 [12 favorites]

Ooooh. I like biffa's. I was trying to come up with something like that, but couldn't.
posted by CoffeeHikeNapWine at 3:00 PM on December 23, 2016

2017: At Least Abe Vigoda is Still With Us. Wait, What? Shit.
posted by JoeZydeco at 3:01 PM on December 23, 2016 [3 favorites]

2017: Sturm und drang

(alternatively: Drumpf und drang)
posted by Prof Iterole at 3:14 PM on December 23, 2016 [1 favorite]

2017: Ubi dubium, ibi libertas (Where there is doubt, there is freedom.)
posted by Emperor SnooKloze at 3:19 PM on December 23, 2016 [3 favorites]

2017: Surely This
posted by contraption at 3:27 PM on December 23, 2016 [14 favorites]

2017: Duck and cover
posted by Huffy Puffy at 3:43 PM on December 23, 2016 [1 favorite]

Alternatively - 2017: Staring slack-jawed into the middle distance.
posted by Emperor SnooKloze at 3:43 PM on December 23, 2016 [8 favorites]

2017: 1984
posted by contraption at 3:43 PM on December 23, 2016 [42 favorites]

2017: Fan, meet shit.
posted by pdb at 3:46 PM on December 23, 2016 [3 favorites]

2017: The Year Of Weeping Copiously
2017: What More Could Go Wrong?
2017: Not 2016!
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 3:49 PM on December 23, 2016 [7 favorites]

2017: Death to all bosses.
posted by BostonTerrier at 3:49 PM on December 23, 2016

2017: Prime yourself.
posted by bondcliff at 3:50 PM on December 23, 2016

2017: Fan, meet shit.

I say go even stronger than that. 2017: Shit, meet Roomba.
posted by ActionPopulated at 3:53 PM on December 23, 2016 [12 favorites]

2017: Be Happy, Smash a Nazi
posted by SansPoint at 4:12 PM on December 23, 2016

2017: It Sounds Better in the Original German
posted by Etrigan at 4:18 PM on December 23, 2016 [10 favorites]

Be afraid. Be very afraid.
posted by still_wears_a_hat at 4:26 PM on December 23, 2016

2017: Sad!
posted by contraption at 4:57 PM on December 23, 2016 [6 favorites]

2017: Year of the Purdue Wonder Chicken.
posted by adamrice at 5:01 PM on December 23, 2016 [7 favorites]

2017: Skip to the End
posted by Hermione Granger at 5:10 PM on December 23, 2016 [5 favorites]

2017: Threat Level Orange
posted by sideofwry at 5:37 PM on December 23, 2016 [14 favorites]

2017: TL;DR
posted by Juniper Toast at 5:40 PM on December 23, 2016 [3 favorites]

2017: The first year that ends early
posted by thecaddy at 5:40 PM on December 23, 2016 [3 favorites]

2017: not to sound desperate but i’m begging you
posted by Grandysaur at 6:27 PM on December 23, 2016 [6 favorites]

2017: one year closer to Trump's death
posted by david1230 at 6:50 PM on December 23, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right B A Start

seriously what is the cheat code for 2017
posted by danceswithlight at 6:54 PM on December 23, 2016 [5 favorites]

2017: Close your eyes and think of England.
posted by bunderful at 6:58 PM on December 23, 2016 [1 favorite]

2017: The Grand Finale
2017: America: The Final Season
posted by salvia at 7:21 PM on December 23, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: And you thought it couldn't get worse.
posted by nothing.especially.clever at 7:25 PM on December 23, 2016 [4 favorites]

2017: I Am America and You Can't Either
posted by danceswithlight at 7:27 PM on December 23, 2016 [4 favorites]

2017: Hope this year exceeds your (positive) expectations
posted by Napoleonic Terrier at 7:39 PM on December 23, 2016

2017: Well, the launch codes worked.
posted by mrdaneri at 8:05 PM on December 23, 2016 [4 favorites]

2017: Nolite te bastardes carborundorum
posted by bigendian at 8:06 PM on December 23, 2016 [9 favorites]

2017: Frantically mashing the rewind button
posted by mochapickle at 8:36 PM on December 23, 2016

2017: [imperial march]
posted by bunderful at 8:38 PM on December 23, 2016 [1 favorite]

2017: I Can't Believe It's Not 2016
posted by dutchbint at 8:47 PM on December 23, 2016 [3 favorites]

2017: Take another Xanax
posted by Toddles at 8:52 PM on December 23, 2016 [3 favorites]

2017. So this is what they meant by going to Hell in a basket.
posted by wwax at 9:37 PM on December 23, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: The Social Justice Warriors Strike Back
posted by Rob Rockets at 11:00 PM on December 23, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: Fuck hoverboards, dude, where's my End of History?
posted by protorp at 12:00 AM on December 24, 2016

2017: If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress?

also

2017: Year of the Rump Congress
posted by effluvia at 12:19 AM on December 24, 2016

2017: Bend Over And Grab Your Ankles
posted by The otter lady at 12:46 AM on December 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: Beyond Thunderdome
posted by EmpressCallipygos at 5:13 AM on December 24, 2016 [3 favorites]

2017: Interesting
posted by andrewcooke at 5:45 AM on December 24, 2016 [4 favorites]

2017: Memories of Butter
posted by Spathe Cadet at 7:08 AM on December 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: And Then Things Got Really Weird
posted by Spathe Cadet at 7:09 AM on December 24, 2016

2017: Giant Meteor, Take Me Away!
posted by Major Matt Mason Dixon at 7:11 AM on December 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: This is fine
posted by cooker girl at 7:14 AM on December 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: To The Pain
posted by Spathe Cadet at 7:21 AM on December 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: Let's all agree to disband and join other nations.
2017: No do-overs.
2017: Because apocalypses are way faster in Roland Emmerich movies.
posted by mordax at 7:26 AM on December 24, 2016

2017: Freedom is in peril; defend it with all your might.
posted by BrashTech at 8:08 AM on December 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: Is it still there?
posted by Cold Lurkey at 8:23 AM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

2017: Welcome to the Republic of Gilead.
2017: Welcome to the Turner Diaries reality show!
2017: There was a terrible ghastly silence. There was a terrible ghastly noise. There was a terrible ghastly silence.
posted by JohnFromGR at 9:26 AM on December 24, 2016 [2 favorites]

2017: Avengers, Save Us!
2017: Closing in on 2020 every day!
posted by bhdad at 10:59 AM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

2017: I hope you leave enough room for my fist, because I'm going to ram it into your stomach and break your goddamn spine!

2017 is the year "The Running Man" takes place...
posted by jozxyqk at 1:02 PM on December 24, 2016

2017: Bend over and spread 'em, here comes my…bullet!
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 1:17 PM on December 24, 2016

2017: Rogue won
2017: And now for something completely different
2017: To the drain
2017: Pack the court
posted by Homer42 at 2:53 PM on December 24, 2016

2017: the abyss gazes back.
posted by janey47 at 5:05 PM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

2017: Because what if 2016 was the last good year?
posted by General Malaise at 6:41 PM on December 24, 2016

2017: slouching towards Bethlehem
posted by Boxenmacher at 8:58 PM on December 24, 2016 [1 favorite]

201: Not sure if we get to finish this y
posted by Nanukthedog at 9:24 PM on December 24, 2016

The Great Leap Backward.
posted by adamrice at 10:01 PM on December 24, 2016

2018: The Standers Have Won
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 10:25 PM on December 24, 2016

Sic semper tyrannis.
posted by glonous keming at 8:44 AM on December 25, 2016

2017: 2016 But Every Time Something Bad Happens It Gets Faster
posted by Johnny Wallflower at 12:47 PM on December 26, 2016 [1 favorite]

2017: Donot go gently into the night, rage rage against the dying of the light
posted by cynicalidealist at 5:59 PM on December 29, 2016